by Unknown
Him being back, didn’t change anything. I would still leave in the morning. Slowly, I began backing out of the room, back through the doorway. In the living room, I slumped down on the couch and waited for the pair to finish their discussion. I wondered what they were even doing in my room. It didn’t seem like the prime choice for a private meeting. Mama was powerful enough to know when someone was moving around within her wards. She knew I was there and she didn’t acknowledge my presence or stop speaking. Curiosity began to get the better of me.
I got up and approached the room again, careful not to disturb any of the rickety floorboards that would be all too eager to groan under my weight. I could make out bits and pieces of what they were saying but nothing that was very clear.
I approached the door, creeping forward, straining to hear their conversation. I stopped almost an inch from the door, and smothered the sounds of my breathing.
“Stupid, I know. It was a mistake, but I never meant for the girl to get hurt.” It was Rhys’s voice. “She got the wrong impression and things got out of hand quickly,” he said.
How is sleeping together getting the wrong impression? My face had to be bright red. I was flushed and pissed off. I was biting my bottom lip as hard as I could, trying to refrain from barging in and slapping the smug prick even though he dearly deserved it. Tears were gathering at the corners of my eyes. The ache in my chest was making itself known with the full force of an oncoming panic attack. I tried to breath slowly, anything to calm myself so I didn’t become a blubbering, gasping mess right there on the floor outside of the room.
“Well, she’s hurtin’ now, ain’t she?” Mama snarled at him. I could practically see the shiny glare in her eyes.
“What are we going to do? The ritual is in two days’ time. We have to do something,” Rhys said, changing the subject.
“Maya will go back in da morning. I fear there isn’t much hope for her friend, but maybe da girl will turn out to be da miracle worker she was foretold to be. I just hope that she can set her personal problems aside and get to work.”
“Very well. I’ll start packing. We will need every little bit that we can carry.”
The floorboards groaned under Rhys’s weight as his footsteps towards the door grew louder. I made a break for it, tip toeing as fast as I possibly could before throwing myself down on the couch just as Rhys exited the bedroom. His sure strides into the room told me he was confident and unrepentant.
“Hello Maya.” He nodded to me before continuing through to the kitchen.
Rat bastard.
Mama followed shortly behind him. She gave me a knowing stare that wasn’t even the slightest bit reprehensive. She walked over to the couch and sat down next to me.
Patting my hand, she asked, “Did you hear all you needed to know?”
I nodded. I had, and it made me sick to think that I’d thought Rhys was a better man. Nope. He was just like all of the rest of them. No better than snakes in the grass waiting to strike and cause as much pain as possible. I almost wished that I had made a different choice and signed the other contract offered by the Baron, but ultimately, what’s done is done.
“I need to get ready. I’ve got a long day tomorrow.” I made my way to get up but Mama stopped me with a hand on my arm.
“Don’t forget what’s truly important. Remember what you’re fighting for,” she said as she released me. I dipped my chin and continued on my way to my room.
Once inside the small room, I grabbed my bags and headed back towards the kitchen where Rhys was.
Just ignore him, pretend he isn’t there, I kept telling myself. I set my bags down in front of the herb pantry and began the tedious process of packing the dried plants and bottles of powders into an already fairly full bag.
“Had a busy few days?” he asked, disturbing my impeccable job of ignoring his existence.
I wouldn’t answer. Nope, I wouldn’t do it. Clutching the vial of dried elderberries as hard as I could, I was shocked that it didn’t fracture in my palm as I tried to focus on anything but him. How could he sit there and act like there wasn’t awkwardness between us or like he had done nothing wrong? I continued packing vials and jars of items I thought I might need as tightly and efficiently as possible into my overstuffed bag. Grinding my teeth in an attempt to hold it together for just a few more minutes until I could find solace somewhere private.
I remembered the feeling of being invisible when I’d seen him in the Spotted Cat that night with the Baron. I remembered watching him scan the crowd around him and have his assessing gaze slide right over me like I hadn’t existed. He had sensed something, that much was obvious, but I was sure he had no idea I was there watching his every move. If I was supposed to be some insanely powerful white magic priestess, then I could certainly muster up enough to just ignore him and not cause the dickhead serious bodily harm. Key word, serious bodily harm. Well, I would, at least, contain myself just as long as he didn’t open his mouth and let more stupid pour out. If that happened, then I would no longer hold myself accountable for my actions.
“I heard that you learned quite a bit while I was gone,” he said, hopefully. He just had to keep talking, didn’t he? I turned towards him and gave him the iciest glare I could manage, which as it turned out didn’t take much effort since I was already seething. If looks could kill, and who knew, maybe mine could, he would’ve dropped like a rock right there in Mama’s kitchen.
Pinning him to his spot, I turned and went back to my business, collecting the handful of vials left.
After another minute of packing, I zipped up the bag and brushed past Rhys, heading out the door. I heard him call out to me after I had let the screen door slam shut behind me. It made a solid thwack against its frame. The screen flung open several seconds later. Resolutely, I kept my head forward and made my way back around to the clearing behind the house, towards Mama’s garden, not acknowledging that he was following in my wake or that he was calling my name. Carefully, I set the bag down and knelt next to it. Part of my extensive preparations was to begin the work of gathering fresh herbs that would be needed.
“What the fuck, Maya? What the hell is your problem? What could I have possibly done while I was gone, I might add, to have pissed you off?”
He was angry and I think a bit hurt by my treatment of him. Did he expect me to be waiting for him? To go running into his waiting arms once he returned home? I should think not.
I shot up from my kneeled position and rounded on him. “No! You don’t get to demand answers from me. Fuck you, Rhys. Fuck you!” I shouted.
I was on the verge of tears again, but I needed to hold it together, especially in front of him. The levee holding them back cracked a little and a stray one escaped, sliding down my cheek. He noticed.
Rhys stepped closer to me, lifting his hand to my face and his thumb swept away the escaped tear. I edged back. He was too close and too comfortable as he touched me for my liking at that moment. Squinting towards the trees, I tried to avoid his intense interest. He was having more of an effect on me than I wanted to admit. I crossed my arms across my chest, like another barrier that would keep me safe from him.
“You left,” I said quietly, still refusing to meet his gaze. I was so angry and hurt that I wasn’t sure I could ever make a full recovery. Rhys jammed his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans and found sudden interest in the flowers blooming next to me. He didn’t say anything at all for a long time. We just stood there awkwardly trying to figure out what to do next and waiting for the other to take the lead and say or do something. I wasn’t prepared for him to apologize. I didn’t expect him to either. He had made it perfectly clear when he’d spoken with Mama that, what had happened between us had been a mistake and he didn’t appear to hesitate in the least when the tramp in the Spotted Cat was practically humping his leg like a dog in heat. Yep, I didn’t want to hear it. I just wanted him to leave me alone. I turned back to the garden, hoping he could take the hint and buzz off. But h
e didn’t.
“I didn’t want to leave, just so you know.” He was quiet about it.
I snorted derisively. “Whatever.”
“Look, I didn’t, okay? But sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to and sometimes we have to leave even when we really want to stay. It’s just…” he paused. “A part of the job, I guess.”
I didn’t bother looking back up at him. “Oh, your job, huh? You mean the one where you’ve been watching me for years and meeting me was no accident? You mean that job?” I poured a hefty amount of my rage into my words, holding nothing back. I thought I even heard him gulp loudly.
“How?” was the only thing he said.
“Mama happened to be a bit freer with valuable information than you were. She told me all sorts of things.” I let it hang there. He could wonder exactly what that meant and how much of his business I knew. No matter how much I tried to tell myself that I didn’t care, there was a burning question bubbling its way to the surface, threatening to be blurted out without any kind of filter.
“I can explain, Maya. Just give me the chance. Please?” he pleaded with me. His remorseful tone almost sounded genuine.
“Just stop. Please. I can’t take any more of this. I don’t want to hear it.” My voice kept rising in volume until it started cracking, choking out hear. I still couldn’t bear to turn around and face him so I just kept clipping sprigs from different healing herbs.
Within seconds he was wrapping his large meaty arm around my shoulders and pulling me onto his lap. He buried my head into his chest. It was so warm and his enveloping strength made me more comforted than I had been in days now. The scruff on his chin and cheeks rasped against the sensitive skin of my temple. I let it all go for a brief instant. But a moment of my weakness was all that we could have. I pulled back, putting some space between us.
Rhys’s face fell. The pained expression on his face said he was hurting. Where I thought I might feel some sort of satisfaction at seeing him wounded after everything that he’d done to me, I didn’t. I felt like shit, if that was even possible at that point. Then the tears began to fall and within seconds I was sobbing. I let out all of the pain that he had caused me over the past week. How had that happened? Not even a week prior, we had been happy and then there we were, both of us broken by the other. A tiny voice at the back of my mind whispered that he wasn’t sincere.
The damp ground was beginning to soak through my jeans, making me more uncomfortable than I cared for. Rhys ran both hands through his hair in an exasperated manner. I had to remind myself that he didn’t know about me being in the Spotted Cat or what I’d heard him say about us to Mama. I couldn’t let the poor man live in ignorance of his transgressions.
“I saw you, you know. Several nights ago, in the Spotted Cat. I saw everything,” I croaked out, wiping my tear streaked cheeks.
“What do you mean? How were you there? And what are you talking about, you saw everything?” Confusion danced across his face.
“The blonde that was hanging all over you? You left with her. Ring a bell?”
The light bulb clicked on in his face, understanding now where I was going with this.
“Maya, I can explain. It’s not what it looked like.”
I held up a hand, cutting him off. “Just stop lying to me damn it.” He was fierce just then. I had angered him, more than I had seen him before. “Was everything a lie?” I challenged.
“Is that what you think? That everything I told you was a lie? Well, look here, princess! Sometimes, yeah, I lied to you, but it was only to protect you. If you’d known who I was when we first met in that bar, you’d have been running scared and you know it!”
“I don’t need protecting! Not from you, not from anyone! I’m a big girl and can take care of myself.” I was sick of being treated like a porcelain doll that might shatter with the slightest jostling. I wasn’t. By this point, I thought I had proven myself enough to be trusted. There was still a lot I didn’t know or understand. I was still new to this world, but I was holding my own! To be given some credit was all I wanted!
“The girl? I didn’t sleep with her if that’s what you think. It wasn’t what I’m sure it probably looked like,” he said plainly. “Where were you? Why didn’t you say anything when you were there? How did you even get back to the city by yourself?” he asked.
“I wasn’t by myself and I wasn’t in the city, per se. I wasn’t more than ten feet from you, but I guess you wouldn’t have seen me anyways. You were pretty occupied.” I let the snarky attitude slip back into my tone. God, I wish my moods would just make up their minds and either be crushed or pissed off. It was exhausting to me to have so many mixed and confusing feelings all at once.
I turned to face him, eyeing everywhere except directly at him. This was going to be like ripping a band aid off, quick and painful. I was mentally prepared for him to tell me that what we had was a mistake just like he’d told Mama. However, I was most definitely not prepared for what he said next.
“I think I’m in love with you. Maya, and it scares the hell out of me. I fucked up when I first met you. Okay, I admit it. I’d been watching you for so long and I had gotten to know you, your habits, your favorite cafes and how you like your coffee. Everything. I just couldn’t stay away any longer. Every fiber of my being wanted to be a part of your life. When I saw that Bacalou attack you in the street, I panicked. I thought you were gone and I knew that they would just keep coming back. So, I didn’t really have any choice but to bring you here. I tried everything I could to not feel anything for you, but I just couldn’t. Please tell me you feel something for me, too? Anything at all?”
I had never seen him like this and I wasn’t sure what to make of it. There was still the matter of what had happened when he’d left. I could forgive him for lying about following me. I understood that now, however I couldn’t forgive and forget the ultimate betrayal here.
“If you loved me, you wouldn’t have been in that bar that night with another girl.” My remark made him rub his face.
“I told you, it wasn’t like that.”
“Then how was it? Please enlighten me.” I perched my hands on my hips.
“I was working. The girl was being watched, marked really, to be the next sacrifice. So I flirted for a bit and made sure she made it home safely. That’s it. I didn’t sleep with her. There wasn’t anything there.”
“I didn’t see anyone watching her. I was there, remember?”
“You didn’t see that guy your friend was seeing? I think his name was Brad. He was in the back corner, eyeing her all night. Anyways, how were you there if you weren’t actually there and who were you with?”
“The Baron Samedi. He was very helpful. He even taught me a few things.”
That got his attention. His eyes grew darker as they narrowed. He was deadly. I didn’t explain further. I just waited quietly while he absorbed everything. After a moment, he recovered.
“I see. It all makes sense now. I saw the Baron there that night. Something felt off though. It must have been you. At the time, I just thought it was Brad or one of the Bacalou making their way through the bar but, yeah, I mean that had to have been you, right?” That was a convenient excuse.
“What about everything I heard you saying to Mama Yansa right after you got back then? About how everything that had happened between us was a mistake and you didn’t mean for it to get taken so far? Because I heard all about that!” I shouted.
“You were spying on us? Eavesdropping? Really? Well, I guess you couldn’t have heard everything because I didn’t say anything of the sort.” He was heated up now. It likely didn’t help that Mama had known that I was there listening in and said nothing to him about it either.
He continued, “I wasn’t even talking about you! That girl in the bar, that is who I was talking about. She thought I was coming back to her place with her for the night and was pretty upset when I didn’t. I left. She was on the prowl and looking for company for the night.
I guess she went back out. Brad or another one of those cronies must’ve gotten to her because they found her by the river the next morning. She was cut up and mutilated just like the rest of them.” He seemed pretty torn up about the whole thing, guilt ridden and sorry.
Was it possible that I’d been wrong? That all of it was just some kind of really messed up misunderstanding? A part of me really hoped so and another part thought that all of it was just too good to be true. That had been my overwhelming experience with life. Things were always great, yet it usually came with a price tag that was much, much more than I was willing to pay.
“That’s horrible. Really, I’m so sorry. You still just left, you never bothered to say goodbye or tell me where you were going. You never said anything. We had that amazing night together then nothing.”
I felt bad that the girl had come to such an awful ending, however I couldn’t muster anything more than that. I had instantly despised her from the moment I saw her tracing her paws all over Rhys’s body. If that damned me to hell, then so be it.
“You thought it was amazing?” he said in his charmingly suave manor that was so unique to him. His dimples showed slightly as he gave a small smile. His eyes were drawing me into their dark depths. If I wasn’t careful, I could get lost in them, never to return to the surface.
“That’s so not the point here,” I said with a chuckle.
He reached out tentatively and took ahold of my hand. With a light tug, he pulled me back to the safety of his arms. I didn’t fight him this time. If it was too good to be true then I’d let myself enjoy it for as long as I could. I’d jump into the abyss and hope that he was there, waiting to catch me at the bottom.