by Tia Siren
But the sadness ebbed, and as the ball had drawn close, her dizziness returned. The deceased Colonel hadn’t been the first man to propose to her, and he wouldn’t be the last. She was sure of it.
“You are not eating,” her father said to her, from over his own bowl of soup.
“My stomach is in knots,” Annabelle said.
“You think you will be engaged tonight,” her father said in a knowing tone.
“As if father would be so lucky, to get you taken off his hands,” Annabelle's brother, Reginald, said. He was two years younger than Edwin, and still lived at home, while Edwin had been married for three years, and had his own home elsewhere outside of London, in the same green fields and pastures where Henry’s home was built.
“I’ll marry before a woman will accept your proposal,” Anna said, glaring across the table to her brother.
“You two bicker too often,” Anna’s mother said quietly, and both of her children bowed their heads slightly.
“Eat,” Henry said, and Anna lifted her spoon to her mouth, knowing there was no sense in arguing with her father. “You do not want to waste away,” he said with a laugh as he watched her. With each bite she took, Annabelle realized just how hungry she was, and through her nerves were on edge, she cleaned her plate and bowl, and then hurried upstairs to begin getting ready for the most important evening of her life.
Chapter 2
The excited young woman knew that it would take hours for her to be ready, so though the ball didn’t begin until eight, she didn’t dawdle in the bath. Anna washed herself quickly after the brass tub was filled with hot water that almost boiled by two servants, and then she was out, allowing a young girl to wrap her in a towel. She went back to her room and was surprised to see Mrs. Clack there. Mrs. Clack had been Anna’s chaperone to all of her social gatherings since she had first developed under her corsets and under her gowns, and men began to lust after her. Mrs. Clack oversaw the servants in the Catesby household, and had done so since before Anna was born. She was a short woman of lean frame, with a severe and hooking nose like a hawk’s, the only thing which marred a rather pretty face. Her eyes were icy blue and her hair as fair as an early morning sunrise.
She was married to Mr. Clack, who had been the groundsman of the manor for just as long as Mrs. Clack had been overseer. They had been hired separately, and met on Mrs. Clack’s first day, as they enjoyed telling the Catesby children every few months. They lived together in a small cabin in the southern corner of the grounds, and had both grown to be a part of the family, as much as they were hired help.
“I thought you may want to ready yourself early,” the older woman said.
Annabelle smiled. “I wish to look my best.”
“You wish to find a husband,” Mrs. Clack said.
Anna thought there was a gleam in the woman’s eye, which might have been a teary mist in her gaze. “You cry Mrs. Clack?” Anna placed her hand upon the older woman’s arm. “I did not mean to upset you.”
Mrs. Clack laughed and wiped away the tears. “Silly girl, it is not sadness, but an overwhelming sense of pride I have for you,” she said. “Your mother feels the same. We spoke of it earlier, and I know she will want to see you off. When you come home, neither of us doubt that it will be as a woman engaged. I can remember bathing you myself, you know.”
Annabelle smiled and nodded. “As can I. Mother and you both often.”
“You were that much of a handful,” Mrs. Clack teased.
“You know, I think of you as a second mother,” Annabelle told the woman, and she could see the effect her words had on her instantaneously.
Mrs. Clack beamed, her eyes widening, her mile spreading to show an almost impossible number of teeth. She had no children of her own, and had become attached to Annabelle in particular, since she was the only daughter out of three children. Anna’s mother had never been the kind of woman to leave it all to the servants, but she had always allowed Mrs. Clack a bit of space and time with her daughter, because Mrs. Clack had been told at a young age that it would be unlikely for her to conceive, and that had proven true.
“I thought you might want to wear this,” Mrs. Clack said, turning and marching to the armoire. She opened the heavy oak doors and reached inside. The gown she collected was gorgeous, a light blue color that shimmered as it turned in the light. The neck was a low cut scoop, and the sleeves were ruffled and fell to the wrist. Down the front of the gown were pale white bows.
“It’s my favorite, you know that,” Annabeth said with a soft smile.
“And mine too,” the old woman said. “Let’s get you ready, shall we?”
Anna dressed in small clothes first, and then let Mrs. Clack help her wiggle into a corset. She sat on the edge of her bed, keeping her back stiff and straight while the old woman sat behind her, and pulled the wide ribbon at the back, tightening the corset and forcing it to give Anna a pleasing hourglass shape.
Once the corset was tied, Mrs. Clack pulled stockings onto Anna’s legs, since the young woman was unable to bend that far to do it herself. Afterwards Anna stood up and they worked to pull the gown on over her head. The skirt didn’t flair as much as other gowns in Anna’s collection did, and Annabelle was glad for that, it made it easier to walk.
Dressing took some time, a little over an hour when all was said. Then Anna sat at a small desk, and Mrs. Clack stood behind her, and they began work on her hair.
“What a sight,” a voice said from the doorway, and Anna turned her head as much as Mrs. Clack would allow to see her mother there. She was the opposite of Mrs. Clack in every way. Heavier and taller, with dark brown hair the color of the bark of an oak tree. She was beautiful, with eyes the same honey brown as her daughter.
“Thank you, mother,” Annabelle said with a smile. Her mother came into the room properly, and stood next to Mrs. Clack.
“Would you care to finish?” Mrs. Clack asked.
Mrs. Catesby nodded and took the older woman’s place. She took her daughter's hair up in two hands, and with practiced movements twisted and piled it. Once her hair had been piled up in a cascade upon her head, Mrs. Clack brought Annabelle a couple of head-dresses to choose from. The girl thought for a moment, and then settled on a small band with two flowers upon it, side by side. Mrs. Clack placed it upon Anna’s head. Then Anna’s mother helped her put on her shoes, ankle length heeled boots the color of pitch. They all went to a mirror near the door to look.
“Beautiful,” Mrs. Clack said. “I fear you may have too many men to choose from tonight.”
The women all giggled, and then Annabelle turned to hug them in turn. “I love you both.”
“And we love you,” her mother replied. “Do you have time for tea with us?”
“I believe so,” Annabelle said, and the three women went downstairs together. Mrs. Clack went off to fetch the tea while Anna and her mother sat in the drawing room.
“Tell me about father,” Anna said.
“About your father? Don’t you know him?” her mother asked with a laugh.
“I know him now. I don’t know who he was when he was younger. If he ever was younger.”
“Of course he was younger!” Anna’s mother insisted. “You want to know about when he proposed to me?”
“I do.”
“Well, it’s a bit different than your proposal may end up,” the older woman said. “I knew your father for quite some time. His mother worked for mine. Your father’s father was not a successful man, not as successful as your father. He didn’t work as hard, you see. So while I didn’t grow up the way you and your brother’s have, I wasn’t wanting either. Your father would not have been a good suitor for me, and indeed he was not. I knew him, and I thought he was dashing, but I could not be his wife, so I fell in love with another.”
“You loved another man?” Anna asked, her mouth opening in shock.
“Oh yes,” Anna’s mother said, nodding her head softly. “His name was Hector. He was a kind man, three y
ears older than I. His family sold horses, and they had grown it into quite a business, and the horses they bred were known far and wide. He loved me as well, though we met when I was too young to marry.”
“What happened to him? He is not my father.”
Anna’s mother nodded, and a small smile curled upon her lips, but it was one that was bittersweet and sad looking. “He died.”
Anna couldn’t help but think of her deceased colonel. “How?” she asked, hoping it wasn’t too painful for her to speak of.
“He became ill,” her mother said simply, and for a moment, Anna thought that was all she was going to say. But then she opened her mouth and more came out, and once she was talking it didn’t seem as though she would stop. “He was a strong young man, so tall, so handsome. Not as handsome as your father, I will say, but handsome. His hair was the color of a strawberry not quite ripe. A hint of red. I’ve never seen a shade like it. I loved it. He kept it long, so I could run my fingers through it as we walked together, or lay together,” she added, with a slight glance to her daughter. “When he was twenty-one he became ill. A cough at first, nothing more, but then it simply kept growing worse. A cough became sweating, and it was a hoarse hacking sound in his chest. He grew so thin in those few months. By the end, he didn’t look like the man I had once known and loved. He wasted away, and he died, and I was inconsolable.”
Anna watched her mother as she spoke, and she wondered if this was the first time she had ever spoken of such things since they had happened. Surely she had never said any of this to her husband, and it was doubtful she had told her sons.
“A couple of years passed, and I had other suitors, but I would not let myself forget that man, the man I had watched die. I couldn’t. I saw him in my dreams. Even awake, when I closed my eyes, I saw him. And then your father came for me. In the years since I had seen him last, he had moved away and built his business. It wasn’t even a half of what it is now, of course, but it was enough. He was in better standing socially, my father thought it would be a good match, and we were married. I was excited. He was the man who helped me forget about what I had lost.”
Anna felt a warmth growing through her. Hearing her mother speak of lost loves and her husband, it made Anna excited for her own future.
Shortly Mrs. Clack returned with a platter of tea, and after serving everyone she sat.
“Mother was telling me about daddy, and the man she loved before him. Have you any such stories?” Anna asked the woman who was like her second mother.
Mrs. Clack laughed, and then glanced over her shoulder as if to check that her husband wasn’t loitering nearby. “I have three,” she said, and the other two women laughed.
“Three, Rebecca?” Annabelle’s mother asked, using Mrs. Clack’s first name.
“Yes,” she replied, nodding. “Well, one was a childhood yearning I must admit.”
“Who was he?” Anna asked.
“David Rothschild,” Mrs. Clack said. “I met him when I was just a girl, ten or so. He moved next door to my mother. She raised me alone you know, my father died when I was quite young. She never had more children, it was just her and I. She never had many suitors that I can remember, and we grew quite close, with no one to come between us. But David arrived, and I was drawn to him. Davey I called him.”
“What happened to him?”
“Nothing, as far as I know. He was a handsome boy and grew to be a handsome man, and though I loved him, he never loved me. He married the baker’s daughter and moved away with her.”
Anna glanced at Mrs. Clack, trying to find a hint of sadness in her eyes, but it didn’t look as though there was any. Sometimes, though something may hurt when it happens, it works out in the end for the better. If Mrs. Clack would have married David Rothschild, she wouldn’t have been able to marry Mr. Clack, and Anna knew she loved her husband very much.
“Second and third were two brothers,” Mrs. Clack said, speaking quickly and quietly, and she couldn’t help but grin when both Anna and her mother gasped.
“Scandalous,” Anna’s mother said, and the three women tittered.
“It was at different times. The first was Martin O’Riley. Their father was Irish, though he had married a woman from here. Martin was nineteen when I was seventeen. His brother was Seamus. He was three years older than Martin. I met Martin first, and we had a bit of a fling. Martin was trouble, though, and he liked to fight and he liked to gamble. One day he gambled and lost. He tried to fight instead of paying and was killed in a duel. I was devastated, and it brought me closer to Seamus. I thought we might be married, but one day he told me every time he looked at me, it made him think of how much his brother had loved me, and he left.”
Now Mrs. Clack did tear up. She sighed deeply and shook her head. “But then I met my husband, and it’s been better than it ever would have been with one of the other men.”
Anna smiled at Mrs. Clack.
“I think perhaps it’s time for you to go,” Anna’s mother said suddenly, looking out the window. Indeed, without Anna noticing, the sky had turned dark and night had come on.
“I’ll go ready a carriage and driver,” Mrs. Clack said. She stood and placed her hand on Anna’s shoulder before walking out.
Anna stood along with her mother, and the two women embraced.
“I’m excited for you,” Annabelle’s mother said.
“I am too,” Annabelle said with a grin.
Mrs. Clack returned and it was time to go.
Chapter 3
The ball was held in Lady Patterson’s manor. Lady Patterson had been married twice. Both her husbands were dead, and both had left her an allowance to be paid to her each month by their respective bankers so that she needn’t worry about marriage again.
She lived in her second late husband’s manor, and it was a massive house on a slight rise just outside the city. A bricked drive snaked up the green hill to the front door, and Anna’s carriage worked its way through the turns as she nervously kept smoothing the skirt of her gown out with sweaty palms.
The carriage stopped in front of the great oak doors of the manor. They were open wide, with two men in smart tuxedos on either side. The driver climbed down and opened the door, offering Annabelle a hand to alight.
“Thank you, Samson,” she said to the man who drove her.
“I’ll be near for when you depart,” Samson said, and then he helped Mrs. Clack out as well, who had agreed to chaperone Anna one last time.
“Remember,” the old woman whispered as they climbed up the steps. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. I’m too old to chase you around this home.”
Annabelle smiled and laughed, and one of the servants by the door turned to show them the way to the ball room.
The ballroom was as big as you would expect by looking at the house. The dance had already begun. A band played along one side, and a large number of guests surrounded the dance floor. Lady Patterson was dancing with an older gentleman. His hair glistened the color of snow and he had a bushy moustache, which reminded Anna of her father’s.
He was Duke Rathers, a well-known bachelor who had never married. There had been some hushed whispers in the last couple of years about Lady Patterson and the Duke’s relationship. It was a scandal waiting to explode.
When the song was over, Lady Patterson held a chubby hand up to the band so they wouldn’t start anew and then addressed the crowd.
“Thank you for coming,” she said loudly, Duke Rathers by her side. “I am not one for long speeches, so let me just say I hope you enjoy yourself, and I hope some of you may find a happiness here you have not yet felt.”
It was common for young people to court one another at dances like this, and there were always more than a few proposals. As the band began to play again, it did not take long for a man to appear by Anna’s side. His name was Bertram Sutherland, a Duke. But his reputation was less than stellar in terms of an addiction to drink, women, and horse racing. Still, he was as handsome a man as Ann
a had ever seen, and she found him wickedly funny. He had proposed to her more than once and had tried to get inside her small clothes even more than that.
“Beautiful Annabelle,” he said, reaching out for her hand. She allowed him to take it, and he pressed his lips to it after drawing it to his mouth.
“My Lord,” she said softly. His lips were plump and wet, and though he had kissed her hand before, it always made her wish he was kissing her somewhere else. Her lips, her neck, between her thighs.
Annabelle was not a virgin. There had been a rather forgetful night where she and a young man who worked in the stables had drank her father’s wine and made love outside under the stars. But that had been it, and Anna had wanted to experience it all again with a clear head and a bit more of romance.
“How many times must I ask you to forgo the titles? Call me Bertram, my dear,” the Duke said.
Annabelle nodded. “Betram it is, then.”
“Will you dance with me?”
“I will.”
Bertram led her to the dance floor, and Annabelle stole a glance over her shoulder at Mrs. Clack, who beamed at the young woman as she went.
Bertram proved to be rather adept at dancing, and they twirled about the room together at a fast pace, matching the band’s quick tempo. Anna looked up at the man, taking in his features. His jaw was perfect as if it had been chiseled out of a stone by a talented artist working in marble. His eyes were a soft gray color, almost like the fur of a rabbit. His hair was dark and fell to his collar, shaggy without looking unkempt. He was a tall man, her head only came to his chest, and he felt strong, one hand on her waist, his fingers gripping tightly.
They didn’t speak as they danced, and they didn’t need to. The dance was one of passion, of desire, and they both felt the heat between them. As they moved about the floor, Annabelle fantasized about what the man would look like naked, and how he would feel, guiding himself into her between her legs. She desired to learn, and once she stepped too close to him. She felt his manhood through his breeches, engorged and pushing against her belly since she was so much shorter. It was nice to know Bertram was thinking similar thoughts.