Robert had moved his hand back, staring at her with a concerned frown.
“Are you all right?”
Beth realized she must have visibly flinched enough for Robert to notice. Flushing so much that her face felt like it was burning, she looked down at the floor, wringing her hands awkwardly together.
“I’m fine,” she mumbled. “I’m just… I’m not a people person. Physical contact with someone I don’t know well doesn’t... well... I find it difficult.”
That wasn’t the case. Beth knew she was lying. Before she had been attacked, she had been fine with people touching her in a cordial way. Now, after the incident, she felt as though she had been tainted for anyone else and if others touched her, she would end up in the same terrifying position.
That one incident had scarred her.
Swallowing, she looked up expecting Robert to be upset and possibly shout at her. Instead, he looked confused. Then Robert nodded and gave her a smile.
“My apologies, Beth. I’m just glad you’re here.”
“Thank you.” Beth didn’t want to dwell on it. Her reaction to him was just embarrassing. It was only her saving grace that nobody else was there to see what had happened. She picked up her suitcase and squared her shoulders. “Do you mind if we drop my things off at your home first? I don’t want to lug these up the aisle?”
Robert chuckled.
“It’s hardly an aisle, but I get where you’re coming from.” He looked at Beth’s suitcase. “Would you like me to carry your things?”
“I can manage.” Beth hefted the suitcase. “It’s not that heavy.”
It was on the heavy side, but Beth wasn’t about to be dependent on anyone, even her husband.
Robert looked like he didn’t believe her, but he shrugged and allowed her to carry it alone. They left the station and walked down the street. It was dusk, and there were very few people about. Beth was glad it was quiet; she didn’t know what she would do if everyone turned out to see her. She knew how small towns worked and she didn’t want to be paraded in front of the old timers.
Robert walked silently beside her. Beth took a moment to survey him, admiring the way he moved, the line of his jaw and the twinkle in his eyes. He was really nice to look at. Beth was glad she had chosen well. Maybe her judgment wasn’t as off as she thought.
“How was your journey?” Robert asked.
Beth was so busy listening to the beautiful lilt of his voice, something she hadn’t heard in anyone else before when she realized he had asked her a question. She focused on the question and managed to answer.
“It was a novel experience,” she told him about the families and their drama for most of the journey. “Luckily, once we left Missouri, I had the compartment mostly to myself, so it wasn’t cramped.”
“I remember that from my train ride down here,” Robert grunted. “It was quiet for about half a day. As soon as people found out I was a doctor, they immediately started asking me to look at various things that they concocted on the spot or showing me body parts I don’t want to see outside of my surgery.”
Beth couldn’t help but laugh. That was exactly the reaction anyone would have done. The husband of the family who had stayed in her compartment had been a doctor. He and his wife had been arguing about the number of times he had to leave the compartment because someone needed a doctor. Beth had a feeling something else was going on, but she wasn’t about to be nosy.
Beth focused on Robert. He was almost an enigma in himself. He was young, only a couple of years older than her, and he was a doctor. Added to the strange but alluring accent he had and it was no wonder women found him attractive. Which Robert had alluded to in his letters. Beth hadn’t believed it until she met him. He could charm the birds out of the trees with that voice of his if he wanted.
“How long have you been in Canyon?”
“About six months now.” Robert turned them into another road, and they walked off the main street. “Charles Farley was the doctor for both Canyon and Frye, but he lives in Frye, and it’s a bit of a journey. So, they suggested that I move here to lighten his load.”
“I don’t mean to be rude, but you don’t sound American.”
Robert gave her a lopsided smile.
“I’m actually from Scotland. We moved here when I was twelve. I haven’t got rid of the accent yet, even after fifteen years, so I kind of stand out like a sore thumb.”
Robert had mentioned living abroad for a part of his life, but he hadn’t said anything about being born elsewhere. If he had, Beth probably missed it.
She found herself smiling.
“I like it. It’s nice.”
The smile she got in return made her want to swoon.
“Thank you.”
If he could make her react like that to his smile, Beth didn’t want to contemplate what his charm could make her do. The thought frightened her; after Baltimore, that wasn’t what she wanted. But Robert showed himself to be an honorable, kind man, both in person and in writing, and Beth was willing to risk it.
She had nothing back in Baltimore; this was her only option if she wanted any chance of a normal life... and maybe, just maybe, a doctor would understand.
Chapter 4
She was everything Robert had ever imagined. Petite, a little on the thin side but not enough to make him concerned. She had long black hair and stunning blue eyes that sucked him in. Beth was truly beautiful. Robert couldn’t have picked better to be his wife.
And yet, he was concerned about her. She had visibly flinched when he touched her hand. Fear had passed across her eyes and quickly disappeared when she realized what she had done. Robert partially believed Beth when she said she wasn’t keen on physical contact, but there was something more. Someone had hurt her, and it resulted in Beth having a fear of being touched.
That didn’t bode well for their future, but Robert was more patient than he let on. He liked Beth through their correspondences, and he liked her on sight; he was willing to wait and let Beth tell him what was going on in her own sweet time.
If she told him at all.
Once they dropped off Beth’s suitcase in the master bedroom, they had made their way to the courthouse. When they were told to hold hands while they exchanged vows, Beth had looked nervous. But Robert let her make the first move, and she eventually held out her hands with a look that said she wasn’t happy about it. It hurt but Robert was willing to let it slide considering what was happening in Beth’s mind right now. She was warring with a lot of things, and he wanted to go at her pace.
Even if the touching thing was a little concerning.
He didn’t kiss her when they were declared husband and wife. He kissed her hand, which had resulted in Beth’s face burning bright red. She looked very pretty when she blushed.
Robert had a quick visit to make that evening once the ceremony was completed, so he walked Beth home and told her to make herself at home while he conducted a visit. Beth had acquiesced, but something in her body said she wasn’t looking forward to him coming back.
So, Robert went off to see another new mother with a lot of confusion in his head. He didn’t know what was going on and it was making him wonder if he had done the right thing. The feeling warred with the thought that he had chosen well for a wife until Robert didn’t know what to think anymore. It made him distracted when he was checking over the mother and baby. Distracted enough that the mother called him out on it. Luckily Rachel Bass was a mail order bride herself, and she understood what was happening.
It was dark by the time Robert returned home. It was completely dark inside his house, and Robert guessed Beth had gone to bed. But wouldn’t she still have a candle lit?
He pushed the door open and nearly jumped back in surprise. Someone was sitting in the shadows, huddled on the couch. Finding his matches in his pocket, Robert went to the nearest candle and lit it. Then he turned and saw Beth curled up on the couch, staring into the unlit fireplace.
Robert was confused.
What was going on? Why was Beth sitting in the dark?
“Beth? Are you all right?”
Beth flinched. Robert was shocked to see how white her face was when she looked up at him.
“I’m fine.”
She sounded far away. Robert reached out towards her.
“Are you sure? Why haven’t you put your things away?”
“I just…”
Then, as Robert watched, something changed in Beth. She went from distant to terrified, almost bounding off the couch in her hurry to move. Robert moved back as she jumped up, almost bumping into him in her rush to grab her bags. Once she had them, she hurried to the stairs.
“I’m really sorry.” She sounded profusely apologetic. “I don’t know what came over me. I’m so sorry.”
Stunned, Robert followed her upstairs. Beth had gone into his bedroom – now their bedroom – and was opening the bag out onto the bed, almost ransacking her belongings.
Robert stood in the doorway and watched her in bewilderment. What had just happened? It was like two completely different people.
Beth was changing so much he didn’t recognize her anymore.
“Beth…”
“I’ll go and sort out my things.” Beth glanced at him and bit her lip. “I’m so sorry.”
Then Robert realized that she was scared. Of him. She thought he was going to be angry at her because she hadn’t done as he suggested.
“Beth, I’m not angry at you. Beth?”
But Beth was not listening. She was filtering quickly through her clothes in a haphazard way, running between her suitcase and the dresser. Robert stepped in and grabbed at her arm.
“Beth…”
Beth turned and swung. Robert barely had any time to react but managed to duck. Beth’s fist missing him by mere inches. Beth let out a grunt of frustration as she swung but as soon as she realized what she had done the color drained from her face until she was nearly translucent. Her mouth dropped open, and she backed away, putting her hands to her mouth, her eyes rounded in horror.
“Oh, my God. I’m so sorry. I…”
“Don’t.” Robert raised a hand. He tried to keep his voice level. “That was my fault. I won’t touch you again. I promise.”
Robert was still surprised at Beth’s reaction. He hadn’t realized she was this afraid of being touched. Whoever, whatever had made her like this must have been awful.
Robert felt anger burn inside him. Some man had done this. If he found out who... there would be hell to play.
Beth’s hands were shaking as she lowered them. Her bottom lip trembled.
“I don’t like to be touched,” she whimpered.
“I know. And whoever made you this way makes me want to go out and beat them to a pulp. And I’m not a violent man.”
“No one did this to me.”
The response came too quickly. Robert shook his head. He would address it later. Now was too much.
“Look, I’ll let you unpack alone. Take up as much space as you want. If my things are in the way, put them on the chair by the window and I’ll sort them out later.”
“Really?”
Beth’s eyes were rounded, almost in disbelief. Robert wondered if anyone had given her space like this before. He gave her a gentle smile.
“Really. This is your home now. You don’t need to ask permission. Put your things wherever you want to put them.” Robert took a step back, giving his wife space. “I’ll go and sort out dinner. You must be starving.”
He wasn’t sure, but as he left, he thought he heard Beth mumble ‘thank you.'
Chapter 5
Robert gave the sleeping baby a smile and laid him down in his crib.
“You’ve got a beautiful son, Charlotte. He’s healthy and seems to be feeding well.”
“He’s actually sleeping well.” Charlotte leaned her head against the pillows and smiled. “I think he’s slept more than he’s been awake so far.”
“Well, from what the midwife said I think he exhausted himself coming out so quickly.” Robert grinned at the new mother. “Make the most of it because it will change.”
Robert loved babies. Mostly because he was only the doctor and he was able to give them back. He had no idea how he would react once he had his own children but Robert was sure it wasn’t as bad as mothers often said. Rachel was happy and glowing with love, and yet she still looked exhausted.
Charlotte had given birth in the middle of the night three days before. The midwife had managed to get there before things had happened and had told Robert the day after that the baby had come out so quickly that there had been a bit of tearing. She managed to stitch Charlotte up and insisted on bedrest, which was clearly making Charlotte agitated.
Robert didn’t need to check if the midwife was coming back periodically to check the stitches. Apparently, they were minor tears so they would heal eventually. He just got to check over the baby and make sure Charlotte’s welfare was good.
Charlotte prodded at her stomach, which was now deflated.
“I’m just relieved my belly doesn’t feel heavy anymore. It just feels…empty.”
Robert chuckled.
“That will change in time.” Putting a blanket on the baby and tucking it into the crib, he sat on the bed. “How’s Nate doing with his new son? Are they bonding?”
“He absolutely adores him. I told you it was going to be a boy.” Charlotte beamed in triumph.
“Yes, you did.” Robert laughed. If he had a dollar for every time a mother had said she would have a girl or a boy and she was wrong, he would be a rich man. Still, it was nice to see them both looking so well.” Charlotte’s face glowed as she spoke. “When he’s up here he won’t put him down. He’s planning on showing him off later once he wakes up.”
Robert chuckled. Charlotte and Nathan hadn’t decided on a name yet, but he had a feeling Nathan was going to have a big say on what they should call their little boy. Robert had a feeling this was going to be a long discussion where neither were going to budge.
He didn’t want to be in the middle of it, but he would love a front-row seat.
Charlotte adjusted the pillows behind her and laid her hands on her belly.
“How are things going with Beth? Are you enjoying married life?”
Robert hesitated. Suddenly he didn’t know what to say. He had been eager to talk to Charlotte about the issues he was currently experiencing, but now he wasn’t so sure. Robert didn’t think he wanted people to know about his problems, even after a week of marriage.
But Charlotte was a friend as well as a patient. She had made him feel welcome when he first moved to Canyon, and Robert couldn’t keep anything from her. Charlotte, along with her cousin, Rachel, were probably the only two people who wouldn’t spread gossip around the town and hang the dirty laundry of his marriage out for others to see. Robert knew he couldn’t stand that and that it would cause irreparable damage to Beth and maybe to his marriage.
In the end, he let out a long sigh. “I don’t know,” he answered finally.
Charlotte raised an eyebrow. She looked confused.
“You don’t know if you’re enjoying married life?”
“I don’t know what I should think if I’m honest.” Robert paused. “Beth’s quiet, sweet and very intelligent. When we do talk, we can talk for hours. She knows a wide variety of topics from her job. But she’s very nervous about being touched. I touch her hand, and she flinches, even if she thinks she’s not doing it. She went to punch me on our first night when I grabbed her arm. She was acting bizarrely after I asked why she hadn’t unpacked and I was trying to calm her down.”
It was moments like that that Robert had a problem processing. He had a beautiful wife who was a real sweetheart when she wasn’t scared of being touched. But Robert didn’t want another episode. He had taken to sleeping in the guest bedroom so he wouldn’t roll over and touch her while they were sleeping; Robert wasn’t keen on being beaten over the head while he slept or of scaring her any m
ore than she already was.
“She tried to punch you?” Charlotte barked out a laugh. “Nice way to start a marriage.”
“Didn’t you throw a cooking pan at me last year?”
Robert jumped and looked around to see a tall, dark-haired man enter the room. How long had he been there? Charlotte stuck her tongue out at him.
“Only because you called me a weakling,” she shot back.
Robert raised his eyebrows at Nathan Price, who moved across to his son’s crib and leaned over the side. Looking down at his son a loving look came across his face, and he seemed mesmerized by the tiny tot before him.
“He called you a weakling?”
“I know.” Charlotte rolled her eyes, smiling. “Awful, isn’t he?”
Nathan quirked an eyebrow at his wife with a smile and straightened up.
“It was the last time I tell my wife not to do something when she’s in the middle of it.” He looked at Robert and sighed. “I was listening in as I came up the stairs. From the sound of it, your wife must have been scared badly, and I would say it was not that long ago. It’s frightened her whenever something similar occurs, and she reacts the only way she knows... she fights back.”
That made a lot of sense. Robert had figured as much but to hear it from someone else made him feel better that he wasn’t going crazy. Beth was like two different people at times, and it was giving him a headache trying to keep up with her. He wanted to help, but Beth refused to talk about anything.
“But she won’t tell me why.” Robert felt like he was whining. “And after a week I’d expect her to be telling me something... but it’s just not happening.”
Nathan sighed.
“It takes a lot more than a week to gain somebody’s trust. If you want answers, so your marriage doesn’t end up unhealthy, you need to take it at her pace. She’ll confide in you once she starts to trust you. You need to gain that trust first.”
“Nate’s right,” Charlotte added. “You just need to take things slowly. You had married before you knew each other properly. Things are around the wrong way, but you can get it back on track.”
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