“Mia, we don’t have to…”
“No, I want to.”
And she did. She wanted to know what every other woman knew, and she wanted to experience it with him. And it would be a memory that she would treasure until she was old and gray…the handsome prince who swept her off her feet one magical summer.
But it suddenly wasn’t enough to be passive in this moment, to lie still and allow him to play her body like an instrument. He was her superior in every way possible whether it be in social standing, financial opportunities, and even in attractiveness. She had never had the courage to call him anything other than “Sir” but if she was willing to shed her clothes and her morals for him, she was certainly not going to be subservient at this moment. She was no longer going to close her eyes and pretend that she was swept away in the moment while he had his way with her.
Here and now they were equals, and he was going to be reminded of that fact.
She rolled to her side and pushed on his shoulder until he laid flat on the bed. Leaning in closer, Mia pressed her lips lingeringly to his and trailed her hands over his biceps, shoulder, and the slight curve of his pectorals before pausing to play with his flat, male nipples.
She was rewarded for her courage when he issued a slight groan, though his hand had begun to move again, shaping her breasts before trailing down her ribs and making it more difficult for Mia to focus on making him just as madly aroused as she once was. Before his fingers could travel any lower, she wiggled down further so her tongue could delicately lick the very tip of his nipple. She closed her eyes briefly before she reached out to wrap her long fingers around his phallus and began to move her hand, stroking from root to tip.
And it was Mia’s turn to smile smugly as his breath became shallow and his moans louder. She had the power now; he was completely at her mercy.
“If you’re expecting us to finish this together, you should stop now,” he gritted out after a few minutes, and Mia half-laughed before leaning down to kiss him again even as she moved to straddle his flat stomach.
She wrapped her hand around his sex and pulled it away from where it rigidly returned to his stomach. Reminding herself that this was what she wanted, she leaned forward slightly so she could position him at her core’s entrance. His cock nudged against her, firm and intimidating. Despite her mind’s willingness, her body resisted the intrusion.
“I don’t think this will work,” she said flatly, vacillating between relief at not having to complete the act and frustration that she’d become this brave only to fail at the last moment. It had been very uncomfortable with only the tip of him and she was fairly certain any further act would have been painful.
“Perhaps a different position,” Dominic replied, his breathing heavy and his eyes glittering. The candle’s weak and flickering flame still revealed the muscles in his shoulders and chest and the flat plane of his stomach that even now was heaving with his uneven breaths. He was so impossibly handsome she wondered how she even had the temerity a few minutes earlier to touch a man so obviously out of her reach.
But it was the fire in his dark eyes that convinced her to attempt the act again. If he had seemed the least agreeable to ending the whole venture, Mia would have gladly picked up her clothing and scurried back to her room. Instead, she lay down on her back, acutely aware that her breasts looked far better in a sitting position that they ever did when prone. She no longer felt powerful and beautiful. The whole situation was again awkward, and the night air was making her chilled.
She moved her knees apart though her legs now felt weak and shaky and Dominic settled his weight between them. She expected him to get the deed done – that was how she now thought of it, “the deed” – but he seemed to think they had to start from the beginning again. Long, slow kisses, the brush of his knuckles against the underside of her breast, his now calloused fingertips sliding from knee to thigh.
Though she thought it impossible, the tension began to build again, the fire that she thought was extinguished again curling in her belly before turning into white-hot need. She frantically ran her fingers over the muscles in his back, clutched at his shoulders, and drove her pelvis upwards so his fingers could delve into her body more easily.
Except now it wasn’t his fingers but something longer and thicker and infinitely more frightening. Mia reflexively squeezed her eyes shut as her insides felt impossibly stretched and the delicious feelings that had coursed through her body only moments before now shriveled up and disintegrated. She had heard it could hurt, that the act could even be agonizing, but she had assumed that with someone as physically perfect as Dominic, it would naturally be wonderful. Painful intercourse should naturally be reserved for the bunglers, the inept, men with crude table manners and slovenly personal habits.
Dominic didn’t seem to notice her growing panic, his eyes shut and a fierce expression of concentration on his face. He moved his hips by only infinitesimal degrees and Mia realized that he was trying his best not to hurt her. His consideration at this point, a point when everyone said men became irrational beasts, made something painfully tighten inside her chest, a feeling not unlike the one she felt when he declared his love of her dimples. With a quick breath, she wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him closer, ignoring the stab of pain and the tears that sprang to her eyes.
They remained still for a moment, tangled together, impossible to say where one began and the other ended, and both of them afraid to move until the pain receded. Tentatively at first, Dominic began to move again, the tempo first slow and steady until he quickened the pace, his breath hot and fast on the side of Mia’s neck. Despite her loss of desire and the minor twinges of pain, Mia found herself drawn to the building tension radiating from Dominic’s body, the promise of explosive passion even if it would not be her own.
Then, his face tightening in the flicker of candlelight, he let out a groan before slowing his pace, his forehead resting briefly on hers before he rolled off to the side of the bed, leaving Mia feeling exposed, sore, and unsure of what people did at this point. Married women presumably drifted off to sleep in their sanctified bed. Unmarried women likely gathered up their clothes and quietly slinked away, hoping not to arouse the suspicions of parents, guardians, or local gossips.
So the decision was really already made for her.
Mia gingerly sat up, looked at the pile of wanton clothing, and cringed at the thought of tiptoeing across the floor naked. Dominic might not have examined her figure closely earlier, when the promise of sex was likely a distraction, but now there was no hiding her pitiful lack of curves, even if the shadowy candlelight was forgiving. She couldn’t even wrap the counterpane around herself for some semblance of modesty – though who would believe that now? – since Dominic was still lying on top of it.
She glanced at him uncertainly. Still completely naked, he looked as if he could already be asleep, his mouth now slack, his body relaxed. Even his…well, Mia had heard twenty words for the thing but none of them really appealed to her. They all seemed unnecessarily crude or strangely clinical now. That had even begun to soften, now slowly shrinking to rest on his golden-brown hair-covered thigh. Dominic’s still heaving chest was the only indication that he had just done anything the least bit strenuous.
Mia eased one leg off the bed, now anxious not to disturb him, intent on making it quietly back to her own room where she could scrutinize every moment thoroughly and cringe at the memory of every horrible gaffe she inevitably had made.
Her toes had almost touched the floorboards when Dominic’s voice made her jump.
“You can stay. The bed is big enough for two.”
It wasn’t exactly an invitation and Mia paused uncertainly. Sleeping next to him hadn’t been in her hastily made plan but there seemed no logical reason to refuse. His bed was much bigger and more comfortable. After living with someone for six weeks and then letting him explore things that no one else had touched, it seemed ridiculous to shuffle back through th
e darkness.
“All right,” she replied, careful not to make eye contact as she slid between the sheets and then leaned over to quickly blow out the candle that had nearly burned down to its brass holder.
She felt the bed shift as he briefly stood before he too lifted the covers and settled into the bed. Lying against the very edge of the bed, Mia held herself stiffly, wondering if he would try to touch her again and not knowing how she would react to him. She simultaneously wanted him to leave her alone but was desperate for him to show some interest in her other an opportunity for sexual release.
“You should have told me that this was your first time.” His disembodied voice sounded loud in the darkness. “I didn’t realize until the, uh, end.”
“Why? Would it have changed anything?”
He remained silent. It’s too late for regrets now, Mia thought savagely.
“Who was he?” She thought he had fallen asleep, so his voice made her startle.
“Who?” Mia asked, though she knew perfectly well to whom he was referring.
“The man who you…had some experience with before. Is he the reason you came here? People said there was a scandal.”
His voice was matter-of-fact, and Mia’s lips quirked in appreciation at his lack of sympathy – any pity would have made her past sound much more sordid than it really was and given credence to all the rumors that had dogged her for years. The darkness made it surprisingly easy to relate a tale she would have blushed if she had to repeat in a confessional…though after tonight, she supposed she had far more experiences to blushingly relate.
“His name was Jack Boole, and his brother and I worked in a house in Frampton together. His brother was the footman, but Jack had inherited his family farm. He would come by to visit his younger brother and I suppose I caught his eye. He was full of charm and flattery and I was just lonely enough to nearly believe it all.”
“What happened?”
“We were caught…in the hay loft of places. How unimaginative. His clothes were awry. Well, his trousers were down, and my hands were places they shouldn’t have been. I thought he’d immediately declare his intentions and my humiliation would be forgotten once I was safely his wife.” She laughed, irritated at her younger self. “It appeared he already had a fiancée...a rather pretty girl who was likely to inherit the farm adjoining his.”
“No one informed you when they saw his interest?”
“Maybe they didn’t know. Perhaps they thought I wouldn’t care. My mistress reminded everyone that she was taking a very great risk on me considering my havey-cavey background. My father had persuaded them to hire me, you see. They were constantly checking to see if I’d pocketed the silver, so I doubt they’d consider seducing someone’s fiancé beneath me.”
A long silence ensued, and Mia wondered if Dominic was stewing at the injustice of it all…he had just discovered for himself that she hadn’t done everything that lowlife Jack Boole had wanted. She had kept her skirts down and her knees together but still had been tossed out on her ear.
“Were you in love with him?”
Mia smiled again at her long-ago, rather opportunistic self. Jack had been a way out of service, a chance for a real home instead of the back of a wagon or a spare room beside the kitchen. She had thought Jack had seen her as an equal, a partner in a future where they both would build a wonderful, solid life. His betrayal had pricked her pride, not her heart.
“No.”
Dominic shifted closer, and she could feel his warm breath move her hair slightly.
“Should I tell you about the ones who came before you? It’s only fair. Though we probably should have had this conversation a bit earlier in the evening.”
She could hear the smile in his voice and knew he’d be glad to tell her about the quirks and eccentricities of his previous lovers, but she didn’t want to hear about them even if they insisted on feeding their dog at the dining table or painted portraits in the nude. They were certain to be beautiful and elegant, with lily-white hands that had never shoveled horse manure and soft feet that only wore silk slippers and had never suffered a summer, or even an early winter, barefoot.
“No, thank you.”
Dominic put a firm arm around her ribs and hauled her flush against his body, her back fitting against his chest and his legs curled under her own. It should have been strange and uncomfortable, a man’s body pressed so intimately against her own, his mysterious and odd body parts nestled against her bare bottom, and perhaps it was, a little. But it was also lovely to be encased in warmth and to have his chest rhythmically move against her, a constant assurance.
“About those women,” Dominic murmured, sounding as if he were speaking more to himself than her. “I didn’t love them either.”
Long after Dominic’s breath had settled into a deep and slumberous rhythm, Mia’s eyes stared fixedly into the blackness. She didn’t know if his last words before sleep were meant to assure her that he didn’t judge her for her past experience. Her heart hadn’t been engaged then, completely against what most of society would expect before they could forgive, but he had admitted that neither had his emotions been a factor in his past relationships. Now, with Dominic, she was terribly afraid that her heart wasn’t just involved…it was completely lost.
Chapter 14
The morning light crept slowly into the room, a light drizzle leaving the sky a pewter gray and delaying the sun’s persistent rays from waking Dominic as early as usual. His eyes popped open when the memories of the previous night came rushing back to him and he turned over carefully to examine the figure next to him in the bed.
Mia was still deep asleep, cocooned under the sheets though she had stuck one small foot out from underneath the covers, her toes and slender ankle looking strangely bare without stockings. The sun’s rays creeped closer and warmed the dark wings of Mia’s eyebrows, causing her to grunt and throw an arm over her eyes. Dominic couldn’t stop his grin when her pale pink lips turned down in an annoyed pout as she pulled the down-filled pillow from under her head, rolled away from him, and settled the pillow firmly over her face, effectively shielding her face from the persistent sunshine. He never doubted that she didn’t enjoy mornings, not with the frown and half-closed eyelids she wore until the church bells struck at least eight, but the proof of her ill-will towards dawn was somehow endearing.
She had put her chemise and most likely her pantaloons back on some time in the night and Dominic again shook his head, almost baffled how he had found himself in bed with a virginal maid. Most women he had known have greeted him and the morning with a breathy sigh, making certain that their sleepy smile was inviting, their hair spread over pillows while the covers just barely covered their bare breasts. But those women had been worldly, knowing that if they wanted his continued attention, they would have to be sophisticated but entrancing, sexually irresistible but emotionally distant.
He knew this because they expected the same from him.
And perfection was exhausting. When he was young, he’d remain all night with a woman so he could walk cockily home by mid-morning, the proof of his sexual prowess glaringly apparent by wearing his evening attire from the night before, but as he got older, it was easier to slip out of beds and return home so he wouldn’t worry about his hair sticking out at odd angles, his clothes being wrinkled, or the need for more witty banter first thing in the morning when his body was aching after sleeping on a flattened pillow and unfamiliar mattress.
How much more pleasant it was to wake up next to Mia, with her mass of tangled hair and disgruntled expression, and already feel like he was home.
Before Mia had surprised him at his bedroom door, he had considered leaving for Hampshire that very morning. The new stable wasn’t yet finished, and he hadn’t planned on a return journey for another two weeks but living with someone who fascinated him, entranced him, even challenged him had put him into a terrible storm of lust, frustration, and longing. It had seemed better to take himself out of t
emptations path entirely before he did something he’d regret.
He certainly couldn’t leave now. Announcing his departure directly after deflowering his maid was the definition of outright villainy. And now the damage was done. To hide from Lincolnshire in order to keep his honor intact and her reputation unsullied now was akin to locking the stable after the horse had bolted.
He reached out a cautious finger to stroke the back of her slim, strong arm and she immediately rolled over, her blue eyes open a mere slit and her wide mouth still turned down in a pout.
“Good morning.”
“Hmph,” she grunted back before her eyelids started to drift shut again. Something must have clicked in her brain because she then sat straight up in bed, one hand immediately trying to smooth down her wild mane and the other clutching the blanket to her chin as she gave him a self-conscious smile.
“I’ll cook some breakfast,” she murmured apologetically, and Dominic caught her wrist as she tried to rise from the bed.
He didn’t actually know what to do now that he had her attention. This experience was new to him too…her wide unsure gaze could have been reflecting his own doubts on where they went now. But then her eyes drifted lower, settling on his mouth and a rosy blush pinked her cheeks.
She slowly leaned down to him, the loose fabric of her chemise gaping slightly to give him a teasing glimpse of small, firm breasts, before her lips met his tentatively.
It wasn’t the most enthusiastic beginning to a morning romp but after a few moments, they both forgot about breakfast entirely.
∞∞∞
It was three days of bliss. They avoided crossing the little footbridge to the main road, as if venturing onto the public road would break the spell that had been cast on the cottage. They made certain they were properly attired when Mrs. Marwood or one of her children arrived with supper, but the rest of the days were spent relaxing by the stream, relating childhood stories and making love. Dominic honestly couldn’t remember being happier.
One Enchanted Summer Page 15