by Anna DePalo
The fact that he’d refused to be paid to protect her gave her some small measure of hope. There would have been a time when she’d have seen his volunteering as further evidence that Connor was just as overprotective as her family. But given what she knew of him now, she thought it was just another way for him to show he cared.
Connor protected those he cared about. It went to the core of what he was. It went back to being the son of a police officer killed in the line of duty, back to funding community projects in his old neighborhood.
Of course, the fact that he viewed the Whittakers as a substitute family could explain a lot about why he’d volunteered his services. He could simply have been doing her family a favor.
Yet, there was a part of her that refused to believe that was the whole explanation—at least, she hoped there was more to it. Because he hadn’t only volunteered his company’s services. Rather, he had insisted on protecting her himself when he could have delegated the task to someone on his staff, which would surely have been the logical thing to do since he probably had enough on his hands running his company.
When she’d thought Quentin was paying Connor for his services, she’d just assumed that her brother had insisted Connor take a personal hand in the matter. Instead, it had been Connor who had insisted. She liked to think it was because he cared about her, desired her…and more.
Quentin’s question sounded in her head again. Why don’t you ask him?
At a thump overhead, she looked up at the ceiling. Connor was up there packing and she was down here feeling all nervous and jittery. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach at the thought of the conversation she should be having with him, but inexplicable shyness made the task seem daunting.
Annoyed with herself, she threw down the dish towel she’d been absentmindedly using to wipe the kitchen counter.
As she went up, she thought about what she could say to him. It’s suddenly occurred to me that I love you? Our relationship may be a mistake, but it’s a mistake I want to spend the rest of my life making?
Maybe she should just start with, don’t go. Don’t go. Please don’t go.
She walked along the upstairs hallway and stopped at the open doorway to the spare bedroom. Connor was tossing some jeans into a suitcase. Her heart wrenched.
He looked tough and forbidding. And pulse-flutteringly gorgeous. In a pale blue T-shirt and jeans, he projected a casual sexiness.
He looked up and, when he saw her standing in the doorway, he paused for a second, folded T-shirts in hand, before resuming his packing. “If you’ve come to do a victory dance at seeing the back of me, you’re a little early. I won’t be ready to walk out the door for a while yet.”
She rubbed sweaty palms on the cargo pants she was wearing and walked into the room. “That’s not why I’m here.”
“Really?” He stopped packing and looked up at her. “Then why are you here, petunia?”
She bit her lip and then folded her hands together in front of her. “To say thank you. And to apologize.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Thank you for what?”
“For helping me.” She took a deep breath. “For capturing Kendall.” For defending me to my family. For making me love you.
“And what’s the apology for?”
“For giving you a hard time along the way.”
“That’s the second apology I’ve gotten from you in two weeks, princess.” His lips curled into a sardonic smile. “Must be a record.”
Despite her best intentions, she found herself becoming irritated by his taunting tone. And, frankly, it was easier to deal with him behind the shield of her annoyance. Coward. “What about the apology you owe me?” she demanded. “I haven’t heard any apology cross your lips, Rafferty.”
He sighed. “Okay, I’m going to play along here. Apology for what? Sleeping with you?”
Her lips tightened. “You purposely misled me about your security services. Quentin didn’t hire you. You volunteered.”
He folded his arms and nodded. “All right, I admit I’m guilty of doing that. I apologize. Is that all you came here to say?”
“Why?” she asked.
“Why what?”
“Why did you volunteer?”
He regarded her for a second before answering, his face inscrutable. “Just following through on what I told Quentin I’d do, which was beefing up your security.”
“No, I mean, why did you volunteer when Quentin could well have afforded to hire you? And why did you show up when you could have sent any number of the experts that Rafferty Security has on its payroll? Why did you insist on staying when you had no obligation to?” There, she’d gotten it out.
He unfolded his arms. “I think you know the answer to those questions,” he said softly.
Her chin came up. “No, I don’t. Why don’t you enlighten me?”
“Have any theories suggested themselves?”
A quiver started in the pit of her stomach as he came closer. “You were doing a favor for a friend you consider to be practically family?”
He nodded, seeming to mull it over. “That would be a theory. Do you believe it?”
“Is it true?” she countered.
“No.”
She backed up, but he kept on coming.
“I wouldn’t say that was my major motivation, much as I like your family.”
She skirted the side of the bed and found herself with her back to the wall. “You must not like them that much then,” she said breathlessly.
He braced an arm against the wall near her head and caressed her cheek with the knuckles of his other hand. “Maybe I like you more.”
Her heart plummeted. Like, not love.
She shoved at his chest and started to stalk past him, but he grabbed her arm and whirled her around. She felt the wall at her back seconds before his lips came down on hers.
It was the way it always was between them. A heavy dose of wanting and need shot through her. Her sense of the world around them dulled even as she became sensitized to his every touch…his lips molding hers…his body pressing against her.
She broke his hold on her to twine her arms around his neck, kissing him back with all the ardor she had kept pent up inside her.
As soon as he felt her willing response, he groaned and took the kiss deeper. His hands moved restlessly up and down her sides before one shimmied down her leg and then snaked around to cup her bottom and bring her flush up against him, letting her feel his erection.
Finally, he tore his mouth from hers and they broke apart. They were both breathing heavily. He looked as if he still had half a mind to take up where they had just left off, which was, she realized, not far from how she was feeling.
He spoke first. “You are hands-down the most frustrating woman I’ve ever known, petunia.”
“Same goes,” she parried.
And then his face was devoid of its usual sardonically amused expression, and what she read there made her breath catch in her throat. “Are you going to make me say it, princess?” He paused, holding her gaze so that she couldn’t look away. “The reason I volunteered is that the thought of anything happening to you tore me up inside. I wanted to rip to shreds the bastard who was terrorizing you.”
“Connor—”
“No, let me finish,” he said fiercely. “I may never be as polished as the guys down at the country club, but I have plenty of money these days. You’d have trouble spending all of it even if you tried.”
She nodded. A giddy happiness was growing and spreading within her. Not about the money, but about the fact that he was laying his soul bare.
“More importantly, we have tons of chemistry between us. The kind of chemistry that a lot of people spend a lifetime looking for and don’t find.”
She nodded again, her heart melting.
“And you sure as hell aren’t going to find a man who loves you more than I do. Because it isn’t possible. I’m so in love with you I ache with it.”
He loved her.
The confession was blunt and to the point—just like Connor—and she couldn’t ask for anything more. Unexpected tears welled up in her eyes.
He gave her another fierce look. “So, get used it, petunia. You’re under this tycoon’s protection for the duration.”
“May I say something?” she asked almost meekly, her smile tremulous.
“Only if it’s what I’m waiting to hear. Are you ready to say the words, petunia? Because if you’re not—” he looked down and gave her a slow, heated perusal “—I can be very convincing.”
“Darn it, Rafferty,” she said, blinking rapidly. “You’re going to make me cry.”
He caught a tear with the pad of his thumb. “Tears over me?” he said softly.
“Yes,” she said, then sniffed and blinked. “You are the most irritating and annoyingly smug man I’ve ever met and I love you. Madly and passionately.”
He grinned, genuine happiness suffusing his face. “I’d say mad and passionate sort of sums up our relationship.”
“We’ll never be dull,” she agreed.
“I can’t believe you were going to let me walk out that door today.”
“I can’t believe you were planning to walk out,” she countered.
He gave her a lopsided grin. “Even if I had, I’d already formulated a backup plan.”
“Oh?” she inquired. “And what would that be?”
“To woo you and make such a pest of myself that you’d realize we were destined to be together.”
“I realized that long ago,” she said wryly.
He looked surprised. “Do tell.”
Since they were being completely honest, she figured she owed him the truth. “I had the teenage crush on you to end all teenage crushes.”
He chuckled. “Now that I find hard to believe.”
“Believe it,” she said firmly. “Why do you think I was in that bar that night? Why do you think it was so humiliating for me to have you of all people turn me in to my parents?”
“You were there because you thought I’d be there?” he asked, astonishment showing on his face.
She nodded. “I figured if I acted grown up, you’d think I was. Instead, you hauled me home as if I were a sack of potatoes.”
He shook his head. “If I’d known you were there for me, I’m not sure I could have resisted you up to now.”
Now it was her turn to look disbelieving. “I thought you did a good job of acting as if I were completely resistible.”
“Acting would be the operative word there,” he said dryly. “Over the years, it became easy to treat you as if you were just a spoiled little rich girl. It meant I didn’t have to analyze my feelings too closely.”
“You said something in the kitchen after I had turned the water nozzle on you—”
He smiled. “Yeah, how can I forget?”
“You referred to ‘what’s always been between us.’ I thought you knew about my teenage crush.”
“No.” He shook his head. “I meant the electricity that practically crackles between us whenever we’re in the same room.”
She reached out to caress his jaw, tracing the crescent-shaped scar on his chin. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”
He sighed but his eyes remained intense on hers. “You were the younger sister of my old college buddy. The precious gem of a socially prominent family. The daughter of people who’ve treated me like a son.” He paused. “There’s a trust there that you don’t betray.”
“Sometimes I wish they wouldn’t think of me as quite so precious,” she grumbled. Yet, she had to respect Connor’s code of honor. It was part of why she loved him, she realized.
“I know, petunia.” He turned his head and kissed her palm. “But it’s only because they care.”
“I lumped you in the same category with them, you know. Then I realized that what I thought of as high-handed overprotectiveness was just a way for you to show you cared.”
“Oh, I cared all right.” He gave her a quick kiss on the lips. “But how did you come to that realization?”
“It was the night in the Berkshires. When you were talking about your father and then going back into your old neighborhood to try to make peoples’ lives safer. I realized that’s the way you showed you cared. By protecting the people and things you loved.”
He smiled but shook his head. “Before you give me too much credit, I did use some heavy-handed techniques where you were concerned.”
“You don’t say?” she teased. “You mean, like getting the key to my house from Quentin? And moving right in when I told you to get lost?”
He looked contrite. “Yeah, that. In my defense, I’ll say that it was only because I was scared out of my mind that something might happen to you.” He added, “But, you were right that I wasn’t giving you the credit you deserved. If you want to continue at the DA’s Office—”
She put her finger on his lips. “Shh.” She knew how hard this was for him. Having lost his father, it would be tough to see someone else he loved in harm’s way. “You taught me not to be so lackadaisical about my safety and you were right. I thought I’d done a fairly good job by taking self-defense classes. The truth was I was a bit cavalier. I’d been raised in a tight-knit family in a nice, quiet community and nothing terrible had ever happened to me. Certainly nothing as bad as having a parent shot and killed by a burglar.”
His shoulders relaxed. It was clear he was glad she understood that part of his nature.
“As for the DA’s Office, I’m going to take it one day at a time. Now that Kendall’s been caught, the immediate threat is gone. I don’t know how long I’ll stick to the prosecutor’s job,” she admitted, “but I know that, for now, that’s where I want to be.”
He nodded. “I can’t promise I’ll always succeed, but I’ll try hard to keep my protective instincts in check.”
She smiled at him, tears threatening again. “That’s all I ask.” She added, “And, by the way, what was it that persuaded you to take our relationship to the next level, when, as you said, you were worried about betraying my family’s trust?”
“The fact that someone was threatening you,” he said simply. “When I realized something might happen to you, I knew I’d kick myself if I didn’t at least try to explore what was between us.”
He rubbed her upper arms with the palms of his hands. “Ultimately though, I’m not sure the decision was that conscious. I knew moving in with you was going to test my resolve to keep my hands off you, and I was right. Once I moved in, one thing led to another….”
“Because we hit sparks off each other.”
“Exactly.”
“Well, I just want to set the record straight. I never thought you were beneath me. Like you, I had my defensive mechanisms. To the extent you dismissed me as a spoiled, rich princess, I was going to try to live up to the image in the most obnoxious way possible.”
“By calling us a mistake, for instance?” he asked, eyebrows raised.
She looked at him, surprised. “Is that what you thought I meant?”
He shrugged. “Seemed logical.”
She shook her head. “What I actually meant was that, if you still thought of me as little better than an impetuous teenager, then I didn’t think we had the makings of a relationship based on mutual trust and respect.”
He looked deeply into her eyes. “You’ve got my trust and respect. And my love. Don’t ever doubt it.” He took her hand then and led her to the bed. He watched with hot eyes as she kicked off her sandals and shimmied out of her cargo pants, then pulled her white T-shirt over her head, so that she was clad only in her bra and panties.
“Aren’t you going to take off anything?” she teased.
“Mmm,” he responded as he reached out to caress her shoulders, a glint of amusement lighting his eyes. “Since you only have on a bra and panties, there isn’t much to choose from.”
Allison laughed. “Connor, that’s not what I meant—”
“But I think I’ll go with the b
ra,” he continued smoothly before undoing the front clasp of her bra with a flick of the fingers. As she spilled out of the loosened cups, his eyes darkened with desire.
Letting the bra slide down her arms and drop to the floor, she said breathlessly, “Now your turn.”
He unsnapped his jeans and lowered the zipper, which made a rasping sound as it opened. She helped him slide his boxers and jeans down his hips as he kicked off his shoes and then tugged his shirt over his head.
Rising back up from helping him out of his jeans, she reached out and stroked his arousal.
He sucked in a breath. “Ah, petunia.”
“Love me,” she said, her voice husky.
Bending toward the bed, he made a sweeping motion with his arm, sending his bag and clothes sliding off the blanket and onto the floor. Then he picked her up as easily as if she were nothing more than a bit of fluff and deposited her on the bed before coming down beside her.
His mouth moved to her breast, sending spasms of pleasure through her, before moving to her other breast and doing the same. Finally, when she thought she couldn’t stand it any longer, he raised his head for a long, slow, drugging kiss.
His hands caressed her, finding her pleasure points, making her moan. “Connor—”
“Yes,” he said gruffly, distracted by running kisses down the side of her neck.
She caressed his back, running her hands over his sinewy muscles, feeling them flex under her fingers. The anticipation was nearly too much as he built a response from her. “Please.”
He reached down between their bodies and touched her. His breath came harshly, his desire held in check, until she moaned, arched, and pulled him to her.
He put on some protection then and positioned himself, giving her a hard kiss before sliding into her with a groan.
“Oh, Connor.”
They began to move together, slowly at first and then faster, while her world dimmed to just the two of them.
When they climaxed simultaneously, her world exploded in spasms of sensation followed by a feeling of completeness and contentment that was total and encompassing.
Afterward, she snuggled close to him.
“You are a wonder,” he growled.
She laughed.