“Baby steps remember?" I say and a wicked grin graces his lips as he makes his way over to the table.
"What do you have planned today, Jessica?" I look at my mother, a little taken aback by her question. She never, ever asks me about my plans. I guess I should take her new personality with a pinch of salt, because I doubt it will last for long.
“I've got a few loose ends to tie up at Stanton's and then I'll head to the shops to get some food in. What about you?"
‘I'm thinking it's about time I got out of your hair. You don't need me here cramping your style, do you? I'll pop down to the letting agents and see what they have available."
I instantly place my cup down on the table and look her sternly in the eye. "Mum, you know it's not as easy as that. You can stay here until you get back on your feet. There's no rush for you to go anywhere, as long as you quit it with the attitude. Who knows, maybe this is what we both need? Maybe we could try and start again?"
Max clears his throat and I'm suddenly brought back to the here and now. Shit. I hope he hasn't picked up on anything.
“I've got some stuff to go over with Heath, so I'll leave you ladies to it. Call me later and let me know what you're doing?"
“Hmm mm." I nod and lean into him for a goodbye kiss. "See you later."
“Oh Jess?"
“Yes?"
“Do me a favour and charge your phone. It's a bloody nightmare trying to get hold of you at the best of times."
I watch him leave and I'm fully aware that I have the biggest dopey arse smile on my face.
“He's going to rip your heart out girl." My mother pipes up as I sit back down. "They're all the same. Men like that only want one thing. A bloody good time, until they find someone else."
“Mum, we're not serious; we're just seeing how things go right now."
“That's what I said with your dad and look how that turned out. Your dad turned heads wherever he went. Everyone knew him and everyone wanted him. I'll never forget how he made me feel. I was instantly attracted to him but I kept my distance for some time. All I ever heard was Di, don't do it. He's going to break your heart and you'll never be able to fix it." She looks off into the distance and I don't know what to say. I've never heard my mum talk about my dad like this before.
Normally she's closed off and never speaks about him unless she's slagging him off for one thing, or another. "He never stopped pursuing me though. He'd wow me with flowers and spontaneous visits at work, until one day I eventually gave in. I let him take me on a date and it was the best date a girl could ever wish for."
“What did you do?" I ask, intrigued at the story of my mums past.
“Well I finally said yes and on the day I stuck my glad rags on and waited for him to collect me. He was early, which surprised me and he took me to a fast food diner, where we happily ate burgers and drank milkshake." She smiles while in thought and it's so good to see. "It was one of the happiest days of my life."
“It sounds like you had a blast."
“Oh we did. You see, I know that's how you’re feeling right now, ecstatic in your perfect little bubble of happiness, I was the same. This Max, sure he might be a decent guy, but he reminds me of your father too much for me to take to him just yet. His arrogance, his persona, it's all the same. Just watch your heart with him Jess, because if you are anything like me at all; you won't recover from the damage. Look at me after all these years, I'm still trying to figure out how."
“Like I said earlier, you can stay here for as long as you need to. Get yourself on the right track, get a job and then we can look at getting you a new place, okay?"
“I've never said this often enough Jessica. Thank you and I'm sorry for the way I have treated you in the past."
“Don't worry about it, like you said, it's in the past. As long as it stays there, then we can both move on and try and make something of this relationship."
I leave my mum back at mine while I pop out to check how things are going on at Stanton's. Hopefully Max has managed to find out some more information from Heath so we can try and sort this mess out before Mal gets wind of it. The tube’s packed as usual, and today I remembered to wrap up warm to protect myself from the icy gale. How I took my leisurely walks along the beach for granted.
Soon enough I'm rocking up to Joe's with numb hands, a tad windswept and a delightful red nose. Oh how attractive I must look to all the passers-by.
“Can I get two flat whites and a cappuccino from the hot barrister, please?" I say with a smile as I try to fight off the clatter of my teeth.
“How's your mum?" George asks while he works his magic. "Gotta say princess, it came as a bit of a shock to find out that she's staying at yours."
“Tell me about it. I woke up this morning and it took me a moment to remember that she was there, but I can't leave her homeless can I?”
“You can if she starts giving you shit again. I hope she realises how lucky she is that you've taken her in."
“Don't worry, I've already had a talk with her. She's officially been warned. Any funny business and she'll be out on her ear."
“I believe that the sex god is also back on English turf, too?" I can't hide the smile that lights up my face at the mention of Max's name?
“Yes he is. I've not seen him as much as I would have liked, to be honest. I'm not going to lie, I'm getting desperate to spend some alone time with him but it just isn't happening."
“Princess. If that was me, he wouldn't have left my bedroom. A man like that is to be used purely for your enjoyment." I laugh as an elderly woman gasps in shock beside me. Bloody George, he has no shame, no matter where he is, and I love him for it. He leans over the bar, much to the woman's distaste and gives me a peck on the cheek before passing me my drinks.
“See you later, tiger" I say and wink at him. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em and all that. It feels so good to have my friends around me again, but for how long, I can't be sure.
"I come bearing gifts." I shout as I walk into Stanton's. It should come as no surprise to see Max seated in Mal's office looking sexy as hell with his tie loose around his neck, top button open and his sleeves bunched up at the elbows. Damn he is utter perfection. He catches me biting down on my bottom lip, while I check him out and he greets me with that devilishly wicked grin of his and I blush instantly.
“Oh is that coffee?" Tim asks as I step further into the office.
“You bet'cha." I look around to see if Amelia has made an appearance, but surprise, surprise; she isn't here. I really need to remember to try and call her again later.
“Any news on Heath?" I ask Max as I pass him his flat white.
“Not yet, but hopefully soon. Hey, I've been thinking things over with this. Did you see anyone in the office or hanging about looking suspicious when I wasn't around?"
“No. That's impossible isn't it? I thought only us two and the PA's had access to that floor?"
“It is, or at least it should be. Have you noticed anything strange going on here recently, Tom?"
“It's Tim." I nudge him in the ribs with my elbow as he smiles playfully and pulls me down into his lap. Oh how I love playful Max.
“Not that I've noticed. There's only been me here most of the time anyway, to tell you the truth mate."
“Why? Do you think this was done deliberately by someone we know, trust even?"
“I'm not too sure, but I'll try my goddamed hardest to find out. That phone call you received Tim, do you remember if it was male of female?"
“Oh yes I remember. The caller was definitely female. That's what got my suspicions on high alert as I thought she might have been a reporter or something trying to dig for dirt. That's when I knew I needed to call Jess."
“Did she have an accent at all...?" Max asks, but cuts off all of a sudden when a commotion breaks out in reception.
"Why are you following me? Do you not listen? I told you to fuck off." I hear Amelia's voice before I step out of the office. What's happened now? An
other row with the boyfriend? Well at least she's here. She still has her back to me as she continues to hurl insults to whoever it is that’s following her.
“You can't do this to me. How the fuck could you have been so stupid? You do realise that you've ruined everything that I ever had don't you."
I freeze instantly on the spot as I hear that all too familiar voice. This can't be happening. It's all got to be one fucked up dream.
“Excuse me?" She shouts unaware of the audience she now has behind her. "Don't you dare blame me for this. Just because you weren't getting any at home and needed to stick it elsewhere."
“I'm warning you Amelia. Do not push me on this, you know how I feel about it. There's no way you can possibly go through with it."
“Just sit back and pissing watch me, you arsehole."
“How deluded can you be? Do you really think I'm going to father a child with a pyscho bitch like you?"
Everything suddenly turns into slow motion. I couldn't possibly have heard that right. A noise of some sort must escape me, because Josh suddenly turns to face me as I stand outside Mal's door with my mouth hanging wide open. Amelia notices a change is his face and turns to see what's suddenly caught his attention and when she sees me, she pales instantly.
After what feels like forever, I finally manage to speak. "You're pregnant? With him?" I whisper pointing my finger in Josh's direction. Oh my god I feel sick, I'm actually going to be sick right in front of everyone.
“Jess..." Josh says as he starts to walk towards me, but Max suddenly stands by my side and he stops in his tracks instantly.
“When? How do you two even know each other?" I begin and then suddenly everything clicks into place. "How could I have been so fucking stupid? You're Mike? All this time and I have been worried about some arsehole that's been upsetting you, and all along it was him. How long have you two been laughing at me. Fuck, I bet you've been having a whale of a time at my expense."
Amelia holds her hands up and steps towards me. "Jess I didn't know..."
“Don't." I cut her off. "You better thank your lucky fucking stars that you're pregnant, and you." I turn on Josh. "You can go and play with traffic, you twat."
I feel Max move closer to me, but it's taking everything I have not to break down and cry in front of everyone. How could they do this to me?
Max
I try to hold her, let her know that I am here, but she quickly storms out of the office without a backwards glance. It's pointless trying to stop her. Nothing I say now is going to make her feel any better. All I can do is be there for her when she needs me, and I'll fucking make sure that she doesn't need anyone else for the rest of her life.
With my fists clenched at my sides and my jaw working overtime, I look at the self-centred prick stood before me and all I want do is rip his fucking throat out. I didn't like him the first time I saw him, and I sure as hell don't like him any better now.
“I think it's best that you leave while you still can." He looks at me as if noticing me for the first time since he arrived here.
“This has got fuck all to do with you pal so how about you back the fuck off to where you came from?"
“That's where you're wrong. It's got every goddamn fucking thing to do with me. You might have hurt and fucked her over in the past, but I sure as hell won't stand back and watch you hurt her again. I'll give you one more chance, which is more than what you deserve. You either leave now while you still can, or I'll personally make sure that you won't be using your legs, or anything else for that matter, for a very fucking long time, pal. Am I making myself clear yet? And you," I look at Amelia, Jess' so called friend in utter disgust. "I’ll see you in my office. Now!" I order.
Josh doesn't wait around for long. The little prick shouldn't even be able to father a child the ball less bastard.
“Don't even think about contacting her either." I growl after him.
"Take a seat." I signal to the chair opposite me and wait for Amelia to sit down. She's gone a perfect shade of green and I don't know if that's the crazy hormones that women have when they're pregnant, or if she's actually sickened at what she's done. Either way, at this moment in time I couldn't give a toss.
“I just want to apologise for my outburst. It was completely unprofessional and it won't happen again." She says, practically on the verge of tears.
“You bet it won't. I don't think it's me that you need to be apologising to either, do you? That's not the reason why I called you in here. I think it's about time we had a little chat about your absent and lateness issues."
“I've had a couple of days..."
“That's to be expected given your, erm, situation. However every business has a policy in place for sickness and so on, and it needs to be followed at all times. The first being that you contact your employer to let them know if you won't be coming into work. I'm not sure how Mal deals with his HR stuff, but I've had a look at your file and you've never been absent while he's been here."
“I tried to call, numerous times but no one picked up."
“There are other methods that you could have used, Amelia. You have Tim's mobile or the works email address, right? Being AWOL is gross misconduct and a sackable offence."
“You're firing me? Does Mal even know about this?"
“Not yet ,and no he doesn't, but I can promise you that if he knew how you had been treating your job, he most likely would have fired you ages ago. I understand that you're not well at the moment and you've got some personal issues going on, so what I suggest is that you take some time out. I think it's unwise that you and Jess should be working together at the minute, don't you?”
She looks at me and mouths a silent "Thank you." to me.
“Don't thank me. I'm not doing this for my benefit. Between me and you, if you weren't pregnant, then I would have fired you, but fortunately for you the ball isn't in my court. That power right now lies with Jess. Go home and think about what you want and how seriously you take this job."
She stands to leave, but pauses as if she wants to say something to me but thinks better of it.
"We'll be in touch soon. Oh, and Amelia, keep Josh away from Stanton's. I won't have another scene like that in here, because next time I won't be so lenient." My blood is pounding as she leaves and all I want to do is get to Jess. I have no idea where she is and her bloody phone isn't on again.
"Tim." I call out. "I'm going to see if I can find Jess. Will you be okay here?"
“Sure. Let her know I'm here if she needs me."
“I will." I pat him on the back, thankful that at least one of her colleagues is still looking out for her. I have no idea where she will be. Jens at work as I remember her saying something this morning about catching up with her tonight and I doubt she would have gone home with her mum there. The impression that I'm getting is that they're not the closest mother and daughter in the world. The only other place I can think of is the coffee house where George works. I hope to god I'm right. I could be out looking for her for hours, otherwise. The look on her face as she witnessed what those dicks had done back at Stanton's is still imprinted in my mind. How I refrained from snapping that twats neck, is beyond me. He had a lucky escape, but if I see him anytime soon I can't guarantee that he'll have the same outcome.
I spot George as soon as I enter Joe's and he tilts his head towards the alcoves next to the window. My perfect angel looks completely lifeless as she sits with her legs curled beneath her and an extra-large coffee cup in her hands.
“Hey." I whisper as I approach, worried that if I speak any louder then I'll break what's left of her. She lifts her head up and she looks at me, her eyes swollen from crying a stream of constant tears and her cheeks all blotchy from where she must have been rubbing them. I want to reach out and make it all better, fuck I want to erase the whole goddamn day and erase what those two spineless pricks have done to my baby, but I can't. Instead I crouch down before her and cup her face between my hands.
“I'm so so
rry angel."
“Don't you dare apologise for something that isn't your fault. I should have seen it coming a mile off. How could I have been so stupid Max? I feel like a fucking laughing stock."
Jess
Having Max beside me makes it a bit more bearable, but I'm still struggling to breathe. Every time I try to get a lung full of air my chest fights against me. I've been sat at Joe's for god knows how long, with my mind full of questions that won't go away. Ones that I can't face, or prepare myself to get the answers to. George has been amazing, giving me time to myself while keeping me in a warm supply of fresh coffee. It took me a while to stop him from marching out of here to confront Josh, but in the end I think he could see he was causing me more pain. I don't even want to think about Jens reaction. This time I reckon she will definitely try to rip his balls off.
Max lifts me up and positions me in his lap once he sits back down. I lean into him really close, worried that if I don't, he'll up and disappear out of my life and then I'll be left on my own. I don't want to think about being alone right now. I just want to sit like this, feeling the heat of Max beneath me, while he silently soothes me by stroking my hair; all while asking nothing of me.
“Are you ready to go home angel? I think George wants to close up." I lift my head and look into those piercing blue eyes and wonder why I got so lucky. He could have lost his shit seeing me crying over my cheating ex's baby news, but instead he has comforted me and allowed me head space. I don't ever want to lose him. I don't ever want to have to wake up without him by my side. Today has taught me one thing and that's to fight and protect what you truly want in life and with Max sat by my side I know now, no matter how much it hurts right now, I'm thankful that Josh did what he did. If he didn't, there is no way on earth that I would be sat in his arms right now.
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