by Cooper, Doug
“Well hello to you, too,” Maura said. “I’m great. Thanks for asking.”
Crystal regressed to her little girl voice. “Awww, you know I love you, Aunt Maura. I just get excited when you call.”
“If you love me now,” Maura said, “wait until you hear what I found for you. This could be the one, kid. It’s for a show opening in Vegas called Beached.”
Crystal immediately thought of what it might do to her mother if she left LA, but she also knew she was probably projecting some of her own fear because she had never been away from her mother much more than a night or two. “But what about Mom?” Crystal asked. “I can’t leave her. I’m all she’s got.”
“Slow down, kid. Just give it a shot before you talk yourself out of it,” Maura said. “I’m telling you, this could be huge for you. If the show is successful, they plan to take it to Broadway. This could be your ticket. Your mom can move with you.”
Crystal had heard enough. She was hooked. “What’s the part?”
“I mean, it sounds like it was created just for you; ‘Rangy dancer and singer with exotic/Polynesian/Hawaiian features.’ With your eyes and skin, you’re a natural. It’s a love story about a shipwreck on an island in the Pacific and how the captain falls in love with the daughter of the chief of the island natives. The captain feels obligated to get his crew and passengers off the island, but he doesn’t want to leave the girl. She wants to help him get discovered, but doesn’t want to betray her father and the rest of her tribe, so it’s all about people being stuck in situations and having to choose between what is best for them and for the greater good.”
“Sounds like it might have potential,” Crystal said, already downplaying the opportunity to limit her expectations. “All right, I guess I’ll go. What are the details?”
“Auditions are next Tuesday at the 3rd Street Dance Studio in West Hollywood. Check in at eight a.m. for makeup and hair with your resume and headshot. Callbacks are in the afternoon, so if they like you, you’ll just stay. I’m telling you, I got a good feeling about this one, kid.”
“You always have a good feeling, Maura,” Crystal said. One of the first things Crystal learned was never to get her hopes up. It just hurt that much more when things didn’t work out. Her mother taught her, Feelings are cruel traitors. Never get too high or too low. Focus on the process, and the return will always exceed what you put in.
Dow Jones Close: 6,930.40
Chapter Twenty-Three
Date: Thursday, June, 2013
Dow Jones Open: 14,992.54
Darlene sat on the edge of their bed with her withered arms raised above her head. Bill slipped the dress over and let it fall to her waist. Helping her get dressed was just one of the many things she hated but had to accept. She wasn’t sure which was worse, the cancer or the treatment. She rocked back and forth for momentum, and with assistance from Bill, she stood, allowing the hem of the dress to drop to her shins. When she had bought the dress for his retirement party only seven months before, it had hung just below her knees. Now with all the weight that she had lost following the surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy treatments, the dress draped over her bony shoulders as if it were dangling from a wire hanger.
Bill reached behind her and zipped the dress. “I’ve always loved this color on you.”
She looked in the mirror and frowned, grabbing handfuls of the excess fabric around her waist and hips. “I look ridiculous,” she said. “I might as well cut a hole in a sheet and wear that.”
“Nonsense,” he said and kissed her forehead. “You look as beautiful ever.”
“You’re as blind as you are crazy,” she said.
Bill held out his arm. “May I escort you to your table, my lady?”
After the last visit to the doctor, when they discovered the chemotherapy had failed, and the cancer had spread from the pancreas to the liver and into the lungs, Darlene had plummeted into deep depression. She rarely got out of bed, barely touched her food, and hardly even spoke to Bill. All she wanted to do was lie in bed with the TV on. Her spirit was shutting down like her organs. The doctor had told them she could have a month or six. While they knew she didn’t have much time left, Bill wasn’t ready to let go—but she was.
In an attempt to bolster her spirits, Bill had planned a special surprise, some of which he had told her because he really didn’t have a choice. She asked too many questions for him to slip everything by her. The best part of the surprise, though, he would wait until the actual day. As part of the preparation, he had her wedding ring resized, which she couldn’t wear any longer because it circled her finger like a hula-hoop due to the weight loss. He might have been able to sneak it out of the apartment without her knowing, but if she did look, and it wasn’t there, he didn’t want to cause any additional stress.
For Bill, preparing a meal had never involved more than two slices of bread, some cold cuts, and potato chips. Despite his limited skills and imagination, he managed to prepare, with the help of the young neighbor girl next door, Darlene’s special meatloaf and mashed potatoes from the recipe cards he found in the cupboard. All day he banged around in the kitchen as the neighbor girl came in and out to help. Bill had made Darlene promise not to come out. He didn’t think she would have anyway, but he knew telling her not to would provoke curiosity, which would get her out of bed and seated at the candlelit table later that night even if hunger didn’t.
As they ate, Darlene peppered him with questions, saying more during the meal than she had in the previous days combined. Enjoying the teasing and using suspense as motivation, Bill refused to reveal the surprise he had planned unless she cleaned her plate, which she surprisingly did, in between suggestions, of course, on how he could improve the dish next time. Bill was toying with her, and she wasn’t going to let him be the only one who was having fun.
For dessert, Bill served her favorite, strawberry ice cream, which he admitted he cheated on by buying at the store. Afterward he knelt down and took her hand. He said, “You have given me more joy in this lifetime than I ever could’ve dreamed of.”
She pulled her hand back. “What are you doing, you old fool? Get up before you hurt yourself.”
Bill remained kneeling and took her hand again. “You have always said life will bring people together, but it is up to us to stay together.” He removed the ring from his pocket. “The day we married was the most important day of my life. I want to experience that day again.” He slipped the ring, which now fit snuggly, on her finger. “Will you marry me again?”
Darlene looked at the ring, then at Bill kneeling awkwardly before her. The candlelight softened the creases in her face. She said, “You don’t have to do this. You know I love you more than anything,” Her eyes filled with tears.
Bill reached up and caressed her cheek, wiping the stream that had broken free with his thumb. “You have always stood behind me, regardless of how stubborn and foolish I’ve been. I want you to know that I will be there for you. It doesn’t matter whether we have weeks, months, or years left together. My love and commitment will never change.”
Darlene slid his hand from her cheek to her lips and kissed the back of his fingers. She said, “Of course I’ll marry you again. I’m so sorry for how things have been. I know I haven’t been the easiest person to be around lately.”
“Not another word about that.” Bill pulled himself up, needing the side of the table for leverage after kneeling for so long. “Somehow I remember that being easier the first time around.” He smiled, needing a few moments to straighten his legs and back. “So there’s only one more decision I need for the wedding: Elvis or no Elvis?”
Darlene said, “No Elvis. I can only handle one king at a time.”
Dow Jones Close: 15,176.08
Chapter Twenty-Four
Date: Monday, May 16, 2011
Dow Jones Open: 12,594.77
Penny an
d Alec and his twin brother René sat in the waiting room before Penny’s twenty-four-week prenatal checkup. Alec had insisted René, who was visiting from Vancouver, come along since they had a tee time right after the appointment. Penny probably would’ve let Alec skip all together, but he had missed the previous two appointments for what she thought were questionable excuses: a meeting with his agent and another golf outing. Both of which could’ve been rescheduled. She wasn’t about to let it happen again. She hated the feeling after the doctor finished the ultrasound when, filled with good news, she had no one to share it with.
A male nurse with a round face and body to match opened the door leading to the examination rooms. He had a receding hairline but what hair he did have was long enough to be pulled back into a three-inch ponytail. “Mrs. Baudin?”
Penny and Alec rose from their chairs and walked toward the nurse.
René looked up from his magazine and wished them luck.
“Come back with us,” Alec said without checking with Penny or the nurse if it was acceptable. “You can see your nephew…or niece.”
René looked at Penny. “You sure it’s OK?”
She knew how close Alec and René were and how little time they got to spend together. She had always felt insecure about Alec and René’s relationship. They had such a special bond that, no matter how much time she spent with Alec, she would always be the second closest person to him. But on that day, she had already won by getting Alec to the appointment. René was family after all. If she had a sibling, she would want him or her to come back as well. “Sure. You can see what you put your poor mother through with both of you crammed into such a small space.”
The nurse led the three of them into the examination room and directed Penny to the chair. “Please have a seat. The doctor will be in to see you shortly.” He smiled and left, closing the door behind her.
Alec gestured to René, holding out his pinky. “The ponytail should at least be longer than the…” His words trailed off as he wiggled his finger.
Penny shook her head and reclined in the chair. “You two will never grow up.”
“I hope not.” Alec said. He walked over and fiddled with the stirrups. “The doctor’s not going to use these, is he?”
“He sure does.” Penny laid back, lifted her legs, and picked up the ultrasound wand. “He stands down there and puts this in.”
Alec contorted his face and turned to René. “Maybe you should wait outside.”
“She’s joking with you, idiot.” René punched him in the arm. “You always were the gullible one.”
Penny laughed, shaking her head. “No, silly. The doc just puts some lotion on my belly and moves this around, and we watch the screen.” She loved pushing his buttons. It was another way to feel more in control in the relationship and keep her own insecurities buried.
The doctor, a bespeckled Indian female with streaks of gray running through her shoulder-length black hair, entered with the male nurse who had brought them to the room. The doctor reviewed a chart on a clipboard. “Well, Mrs. Baudin.” She looked up and noticed Alec and René. “And Mr. Baudin, or rather Baudins.” She moved her finger back and forth between the two, noticing their identical appearance, unsure who was whom.
Alec stepped forward. “Nice to meet you, doc. This is my younger brother René, or rather, ‘the placenta that lived,’ as he was known growing up.”
René simultaneously reached out to shake the doctor’s hand with his left and smacked Alec in the back of the head with his right. “The better-looking, smarter brother as I’m known now.”
The doctor shook hands then pulled a stool next to Penny. “So how have you been feeling lately?”
“Physically I feel really good, better than last month actually,” Penny said. “But I haven’t been feeling any movement for the past week or so.”
“Periods of inactivity are common, so probably nothing to worry about there.” The doctor looked again at Penny’s chart. “Your blood pressure is a bit higher than last time.”
Alec walked over and stood at the head of the bed with a hand on Penny’s shoulder. “Is that bad?”
“Not necessarily,” the doctor said. “At this stage, I would expect it to stay consistent or maybe go down until a few weeks before birth.” She picked up the wand and a tube of coupling gel. “Let’s have a look.” She held the tube over her belly. “You know the drill. This is going to be a little cold.” She squirted the gel and spread it around with the transducer. Penny winced then relaxed. The doctor said, “Never get used to that, do you?” She flipped on the ultrasound machine and applied the transducer to Penny’s belly. All their eyes flashed to the screen, even though most of them didn’t know what they were looking at. The shape of a fetus formed on the screen. The doctor moved the transducer around.
Penny shifted her eyes from the screen to the doctor. Panic seized her. “There’s a problem, isn’t there? I knew it. I should’ve come in last week.”
The doctor handed the nurse the transducer. She removed her gloves. Her soft, dark eyes drooped. “I’m sorry. There’s really no good way to say this. I wish I could tell you what happened or why, but sometimes these things just happen.”
“Please no. Don’t say it.” Penny fought to hold back the tears. “This can’t be happening.”
The doctor placed her hand on Penny’s. “I’m so sorry.”
Alec said, “What happened? What do you mean? We could see the baby on the screen.”
“The baby is still there,” the doctor said. “The heart has just stopped.”
Penny clutched her stomach. “When? How?” She had known right away something was different. She could just tell. She hadn’t been as tired or emotional. She was actually feeling normal. She had wanted to call the doctor right away, but Alec thought she was overreacting, that her feeling better was a positive sign. Penny closed her eyes and looked away. René drifted toward the door, trying to be invisible. The nurse wiped the gel from Penny’s stomach and lowered her shirt to cover her belly.
The doctor said, “I’m so terribly sorry. I wish I could tell you more. The good news is there is no reason why you can’t try again.” The doctor stood up. Penny still couldn’t look at her. She couldn’t look at anyone. Her head remained turned away from Alec, eyes closed. The doctor said, “I’ll give you some privacy and come back in a few minutes to discuss the options.”
Penny heard shuffling noises as the doctor stood and left. The sound of the door latching echoed through the room. The emotion she had been restraining and allowing to escape as gentle whimpering burst into full sobbing. She expected to feel Alec’s hand stroke her hair or his lips on her cheek, or at least hear his comforting voice, but there was nothing. She rolled over and scanned the room. “Alec?”
The room was empty. He had exited with the doctor, nurse, and René. Later he explained that he thought he was supposed to, that when the doctor said, “I’ll give you some privacy,” it meant everyone should leave. But in that moment, lying there completely alone in the sterile examination room, she couldn’t fathom a single reasonable explanation as to why he would leave her. All she could hear was the sound of her sobbing bouncing off the white walls, which only made her cry that much more.
A knock sounded at the door. Penny stifled her sobbing and sat up, wiping the tears away with her hands. She plucked a tissue from the box on the stand next to her.
The doctor stuck her head into the room. “Is it all right to come in or do you need more time?”
Penny didn’t want to spend another second alone in that room. “No, please come in,” she said in a nasal tone due to the crying. She blew her nose into the tissue. “I’m sorry for being such a mess.”
The doctor entered, carrying pamphlets and literature. “That’s OK. I understand.” She looked around the room. “Should we wait for your husband?”
Penny fought the urge
to cry again. “No, he is getting some air,” she said. “He doesn’t like hospitals too much.”
The doctor handed the papers to her. “First, I want to reiterate that you didn’t do anything wrong. Some babies are just not strong enough to make it through the pregnancy. The important thing is that we keep you healthy so you can try again when the time is right.”
“Oh no,” she said. “I’m not putting myself through this again.”
“No need to make that decision now,” the doctor said. “But what we do need to decide is how we are going to resolve this. Based on the ultrasound, no membranes have ruptured or signs of infection are apparent so we can wait for natural labor to commence, or we can schedule an induction.”
Penny didn’t hesitate. “How soon can we do the induction?”
The doctor said, “The materials I gave you go over the options, so take some time and discuss with your husband and get back to me. There’s no rush. The most important thing to remember is that you are not at risk.”
“No, the sooner, the better,” Penny said.
The doctor scribbled notations on her chart. “OK, I understand your urgency. My assistant will come by with available times and we’ll get that scheduled right away.”
“Doc, can I ask you something?” The emotion flooded back into her voice. “Was it a boy or girl?”
The doctor put her hand on Penny’s knee to comfort her and soften the impact. “You were having a girl.”
Dow Jones Close: 12,548.77
Chapter Twenty-Five
Date: Friday, March 21, 2014
Dow Jones Open: 16,332.69
Two different people from two different worlds, living very different lives. That’s what I was thinking while watching Les and Crystal play together at my table. There wasn’t very much interaction between them other than the occasional acknowledgement of one another’s smart play. Both knew the game and recognized that in each other. Beyond that there just wasn’t much common ground between them.