by Mary Eason
It was almost eight o’clock when she walked into the house. Brody still wasn’t home. As she walked through the empty place, she understood why he rarely rushed home. The silence of the place was almost deafening. Reyna tossed her bag on the bed and went to the kitchen.
For the first time in a long time, she realized she was hungry. Reyna had passed on the kind offer Martha’s made to make her breakfast. During the day, there really hadn’t been time to eat. Now as she looked around the pristine gourmet kitchen, Reyna wondered if she dared to attempt to prepare anything. The place looked magazine perfect.
It was obvious Brody rarely used the kitchen. No doubt, he mostly chose to dine out. Not that she could really blame him. It wasn’t much fun eating alone. That was one thing Reyna had found hard to get used to with Cade rarely home.
She opened the refrigerator door and stood scanning its contents unaware she was no longer alone.
* * * *
Brody stood silently watching the girl who looked strangely out of place standing in his kitchen. He just couldn’t get used to seeing her there, but he liked knowing he was coming home to her.
She was dressed in loose-fitting dress pants, but he could still see the slim curve of her hip and the way they clung to her bottom. The white tee shirt, although slightly dressier, was similar enough to what she’d worn last night in bed to remind him of everything he hadn’t been unable to forget most of today. How she felt in his arms as she clung to him in her sleep and what lay beneath that innocent white tee shirt.
Her body was perfect. Her slim legs tanned against the white panties and shirt was enough to send his mind back to places he’d been going to in his fantasies since meeting her. Someone had chosen to hurt her. Even though she denied it and he remembered every single one of Cade’s graphic details of what she liked, it was evident she hadn’t enjoyed this. It was there in her eyes. The fear and hurt were all too clear, in spite of what Cade told him.
Brody must have made some small sound because she turned quickly around, startled by his presence. Her hands dropped to her sides, the fridge slammed shut behind her making her jump. Her gaze collided with his for a moment before looking away. She still couldn’t look at him, he thought a little bitterly. He wasn’t sure if she were embarrassed by their closeness the night -before, or by what he’d discovered about her.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he said, taking another step closer. “You look nice. What have you been up to today?”
Her fingers automatically went to her hair and he remembered something, some past comment Cade had made about how much Reyna hated her hair, because in her opinion, it always looked disheveled. Of course, he’d taken advantage of every opportunity to steer the conversation to Reyna whenever he and Cade were together. The corner of his mouth lifted slightly at that thought. She had no idea how obsessed he’d become by every little detail of her. She looked stunning to him. A mixture between lost child and very, very seductive woman.
His eyes slipped slowly over her body. From the blond curls that had fallen in her face, past the tee shirt that clung to her small, firm breasts, down past her flat stomach to the legs he knew were very tan beneath those starched, pinstriped pants. The way she looked standing there so innocently before him did things to his libido that he found hard to control. His gaze met hers again and she saw his reaction. He couldn’t really hide how much he wanted her. Hell, he really didn’t want to. He liked the way she blushed from her head to her toes every time he looked at her as he was at this moment.
“I went job hunting today.” She shook her head making a face that told him just how pitiful the outcome had been and he laughed.
“No luck, huh? Well, don’t get too discouraged. Job hunting, especially in Denver, can be brutal.”
“I wasn’t expecting you to be home this early,” she said nervously. “I was going to make something to eat. Would you like to join me? I could make us dinner.”
He watched her hold her breath. It was hard not to smile and try to ease away her doubts.
Brody didn’t want to have dinner with her. Mostly because he wasn’t sure, he could simply share the intimacy of a meal together with her and not want more. Much more. How soon would it be before she guessed the truth? Figured out that this whole suggestion of having her live with him was just a ploy to be close to her for a little while.
He realized she was reading his hesitation as rejection. Reyna turned away. She opened the fridge again and pretended to study its contents again.
Brody let go of his own breath in a sharp sigh. If he didn’t get control soon, this would never work out. Whatever it was he was trying to get worked out. He forced his less than ‘friendly’ manner aside and steadied his voice.
“I’d like that very much. Can you give me ten minutes? I want to shower and change and then I’m all yours. I’ll be back in a second to help you.”
She was busy chopping vegetables for a salad when he returned, wearing jeans, and a black pullover sweater. He stepped close to her taking the knife from her unresisting hand. She moved away as if she couldn’t stand to be too close to him.
“Something smells good.” Brody watched her curiously, trying not to let her see how much her retreat hurt. Reyna opened the oven and looked inside. Her hand went uneasily up to tuck a wayward curl behind her ear. He was quickly becoming familiar with that little move. He knew what that gesture meant. She was all nerves around him.
“It’s salmon and it’s ready. I thought we could eat outside on the deck, if that’s okay with you. It’s such a nice evening for October.” He smiled at her edginess and took the dish from her, following her outside.
She was right, not that he ever really noticed the world outside of work anymore.
Tonight, the evening was cool, with a slight touch of the winter to come on the breeze that carried the sounds of the city up to where they sat drinking red wine.
They talked about small things throughout the meal. He noticed she was actually relaxing a little.
Brody listened while Reyna told him about her day and the job interviews she had scheduled for the following day. “Reyna, you know if none of those positions work out, I can help you. All you have to do is ask.”
“No, Brody—at least not right away. I want to try to find something on my own. I don’t want to depend on you for everything. You’ve done too much as it is. Do you understand what I mean? It’s important for me that I learn to stand on my own two feet.”
His eyes searched her face wondering if she realized just how small and breakable she appeared to him. Even now, when she was fighting to control her own future, her eyes were begging him to understand. He did. He knew just how important it was to stand alone in a city that could easily destroy a person if they gave an inch.
“I do understand. I know how important self-reliance and integrity can be. Sometimes it’s all you have. But my offer to help will always be there, no matter what happens and without any attachments.” He hesitated for a moment. He had to be so careful not to break the small amount of trust he’d achieved with her. He wanted to ask her about the bruises fading on her body. He needed to know who was responsible for hurting her in such an inhumanly male way, but he dared not knowing she wouldn’t answer him. It was too soon.
So instead of pushing, he listened while she told him about her childhood, growing up with her grandmother.
“Cade mentioned something about your parents dying when you were just a child. That must have been hard. Growing up without them in your life.”
Although she still smiled, her expression held a sad wistfulness.
“I was only five when they were both killed in a car accident. I didn’t really understand why they never came back to me. Gran said I cried for weeks after, although I don’t really remember much about that time. I guess I blocked the hurt out somehow. I was so lucky I had Gran. She was so good to me.”
“You have a cousin, right? Living here in the city?” Brody saw her express
ion change. He’d gathered Reyna and her cousin weren’t all that close when Reyna didn’t mention her cousin as a possible solution to her homeless state. Not that Brody minded. He hated to admit it, but he’d been thrilled they weren’t close.
“Yes, but Jenna and I don’t have much in common and we’ve never really been all that close.”
“So you were happy living with your grandmother?”
“Yes, Gran was great. As tragic as it was to lose them both at one time, they wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. They were so much in love with each other. I think it would have been impossible for one to go on without the other.”
This surprised him. He would have thought a child five years old would never have noticed such a strong emotional love as what her parents clearly had felt for each other.
“Most parents tell their children fairy tales. My mother used to tell me stories of how she and my father met and fell in love. Mom knew it was love from the moment she saw him. They were so happy together.”
Brody watched her as she spoke about her parents and their happiness and wondered how someone who had endured so much tragedy in her own life could still hold onto the belief in fairy tale love stories as she so clearly did. He wondered what she would say if he told her the truth about her husband. Cade was certainly no prince charming at all. He’d made it a point of boasting about the women he’d slept with after being married for such a short time to Reyna.
It wasn’t his right to take her memories away. It wouldn’t make her love Cade any less. The very thought of his friend’s cruelty still had the power to anger him.
“You really believe in that fairy tale? Love at first sight? Even in this day and age? Is that what happened with you and Cade?”
Reyna didn’t look at him but she didn’t need to for him to see her reaction to those words. Brody hated himself for trying to make her see the truth. She needed to believe in those fairy tales to hold onto Cade.
“Yes, I do believe that. I have to.” Her answer, spoken so softly, was little more than a whisper. He had to strain to catch the words but he couldn’t mistake the appeal in her voice. She still hadn’t answered his question about Cade. She was deliberately avoiding it and he found himself pressing her once more, realizing there was something about her lack of answer right now that wasn’t quite right.
“Is that how you felt about Cade, Reyna? If that’s true, then for the rest of your life, are you planning on living in the past? You’re twenty-three years old. You have your whole life ahead of you. You shouldn’t give it up to live in the past. Sometimes, we imagine things we want to believe are true when, in reality, they’re just something we’ve created in our minds. Something that helps us face the truth.”
She shook her head not answering the question, her silence sending his imagination out of control. Maybe all those things Cade had told him about Reyna were true. Maybe she’d been just as unfaithful as Cade. Maybe she wasn’t the sad widow she appeared to be.
“What about you? It’s obvious you’ve been hurt by someone. What was it that turned you so against love? Who was she?” The moment the words were out, Brody could tell she regretted asking them.
His laugh sounded anything but humorous. Brody found himself wondering again just, what she would say if he told her, the only woman he would ever love was sitting next to him now, lost in her past.
“There was no woman. At least, not in the way you mean. After watching my father drink himself to death because he loved my mother and couldn’t get beyond that love, well, it made me realize that nothing lasts forever. What may be love eternal for one person can be a prison for another. You don’t own another person or their feelings. You certainly can’t stop those feelings from changing.”
“Brody, I’m sorry, I’d, forgotten. Cade mentioned something about your parents divorcing when you were young but I didn’t realize how hard that must have been for you. I’m sorry. I…I shouldn’t have brought it up.”
She put her hand on his arm. She was trying to comfort him. Brody rejected that comfort. He didn’t want her pity.
“It’s okay. It happened a very long time ago. It made me see the truth clearly. There really isn’t any such thing as a fairy tale. We’re all human. With very human flaws. Sometimes, it’s best to live in the human world. You don’t get disappointed nearly as much.” He looked at her and realized she was crying. He hadn’t expected her tears, and they shocked him. His reaction to seeing them shocked him even more.
Brody touched her cheek in wonder, wiping away a tear with his thumb. He couldn’t remember anyone ever crying for him before. His voice shook when he spoke.
“Don’t, Reyna. Don’t cry for me. I didn’t tell you about my parents to make you sad. Who knows? Maybe you’re the right one after all. Maybe there really is someone for everyone. Maybe my someone is closer than I think.”
Reyna pulled away then stood and walked over to the railing. The house was perched high on a hill overlooking the city. The views were magnificent.
“Which one is yours, Brody? Which building is Samuels Advertising?” She turned back to him, unexpectedly catching him watching her. The look of raw need in his eyes that had been there so many times took her by surprise. Brody tried to push his feelings aside, but she’d seen. She had to know he wanted her. How soon before she guessed the truth?
He came and stood close behind her; he could feel the change in her. Would there ever be a time when she trusted him completely. He pointed to one of the buildings, speaking softly against her ear. His breath disturbed a pale strand of her hair. She shivered.
“It’s that one. The black glass building three blocks to your left. I’d almost forgotten you were never there before. Why is that, Reyna? Why was it that you chose not to visit the place where your husband spent a great deal of his time each day? I know you didn’t because Cade told me.”
He watched her closely. She was trying to come up with an answer he would believe. She was going to lie.
What was she hiding? He could almost feel her rejecting his questions even before he could voice them. Something was wrong between her and Cade, beyond Cade’s affairs.
Brody didn’t want to believe Cade’s accusations about her sexual experience or the drugs. Nothing about what he believed her to be fit with Cade’s description of his wife.
“It’s late, Brody, and I’m tired. I think I should go to bed now.” She didn’t look at him again. She all but edged past him, careful not to touch him and he let her go without trying to stop her.
Reyna left him standing alone silently cursing his foolish tongue. Wishing he could take back the words that had taken her away from him, and wondering once again what dark secret she kept securely hidden away from him.
Chapter Six
It was becoming harder with each passing day for Reyna to remember Brody was just her friend. It was almost frightening how easy she had adjusted to living with him. She actually looked forward to spending each evening alone with Brody. In the past, she’d dreaded Cade’s return on the occasions when he did choose to come home.
Over the past week, since she had moved into Brody’s house, they had spent every evening together, either making dinner together or ordering in.
She found herself wondering a thousand times why someone so devastatingly attractive, so kind and caring had survived so long unattached.
Brody would be someone’s perfect match. Someone’s best friend. He was everything any woman would want in a man. Strong and determined, yet tender and so caring.
Reyna sometimes wondered if he were waiting until she was settled into her new life before resuming his normal routine. Of course, she knew it was only a matter of time before he started seeing other women again. Why did the thought of him with another woman, holding her, making love with her always fill Reyna with such despair that she wanted to cry?
Reyna put down the book she had been trying to read and removed the small black-framed glasses she wore for reading. She switched on the TV, try
ing once again to concentrate on the old movie she had been trying to get through. It was one of those old Alfred Hitchcock thrillers. One of her favorites, but for some reason, she just couldn’t concentrate on it.
Brody called earlier in the evening to let her know his meeting was running late and he wouldn’t be home until much later. He told her that he would be grabbing some take-out for them on the way home.
Reyna couldn’t remember the last time someone had actually considered her feelings enough to call her and let her when he was running late. She found it both comforting and just a little unnerving as well.
She was staring at the TV without really paying attention when she heard his key in the door and her heart began the all too familiar frantic beat. She forced herself not to go to him. She didn’t want to feel this much happiness simply by his presence.
Absently, Reyna put the glasses back on, somehow feeling as if they gave her a barrier to hide her feelings from him.
“Hi there.” She turned to see him standing in the doorway watching her. As always, Brody looked devastatingly handsome, making her wish… Reyna shook her head killing that train of thought before it could take life.
“Hi there.” She wondered if he too felt the same awkwardness she did each time, they saw each other again. Reyna looked at him fully for the first time. He looked tired. Exhaustion clung to his eyes.
“You look tired. Are you okay?” Reyna heard her voice, it sounded so breathless. Her heart went out to him.
“I’m fine. Don’t worry. Come on, baby, let’s eat. I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”
Reyna let him take her hand as they walked into the kitchen. She couldn’t say a word. Her mind was trying to understand the sweet endearment he’d used when he spoke to her. It came so easily for him, so naturally, but it sent shivers through her each time he spoke to her in that tender way. He’d never called her that before.