by Jessop, K. L
Adam doesn’t reply. He just stands, glaring at Jamie with a tense jaw, while I stand praying that he will leave soon before the temperatures rise. With a smirk, Jamie turns to me, and Adam laces his fingers through mine as if I need protection. “And, Everly. You look… you look amazing.”
I’m taken back by his words that have him seeming unusually polite, but that doesn’t mean I buy it. However, to keep good feeling, I smile. “Thank you.”
“What are you doing here, Jamie?” Adam asks abruptly.
Jamie opens his arms as if to state the obvious. “It’s New Years, and this is where the party’s at. Can’t I come and have a little fun?”
“Of course,” I reply, wanting to end this tension that’s suddenly taking over. “Adam and I are going to go back and dance now.”
“Whatever.”
I pull Adam back to the dance floor and take his jaw in my hands, but his eyes are still on Jamie.
“Look at me, Adam Knight.” He does and that tension is gone within seconds. “Now you listen to me. You are always telling me not to let him get to me. The same goes for you, too. Who cares if he is here? This is our night. Not his. Ours. We are going to dance and have fun and forget about him. Please don’t let him get to you. Nothing is important other than us right here okay?”
He watches me a moment, his chocolate eyes focused on mine, before I feel him relax completely and a smile graces his lips. “You’re a remarkable woman, Everly Rose.”
“That’s why you love me.” I scrunch my nose up playfully. “Promise me you won’t let him get to you?”
“I promise.”
“Good. Now let’s get a drink, it’s almost midnight.”
* * *
“THREE. TWO. ONE. HAPPY NEW YEAR!”
Streamers pop, fireworks explode outside and people begin to link arms and sing Auld Lang Syne, a New Year’s tradition that I don’t think will ever die. The buzz of the social hall has doubled, and the atmosphere is nothing less than enchantment and adoration. Our little market town has always been one filled with love and friendship, but there is something about bringing in the new year that brings us closer together. I guess in this very moment we all are wanting the same things: to have another successful year filled with hope, dreams and fortune. The strong arms of Adam pull me towards him and before I can say anything, he takes my face in both hands, and kisses me. For the second time in a matter of hours, our tongues dance, heat rises in my body and goosebumps glaze across my skin with his touch. “Happy new year, Everly,” he whispers against my lips.
“Happy new year. Thank you for being a big part of my life.”
“Thank you for being every part of mine. You have no idea how much I love you and how much more I want to do with you. I want to take you on those adventures we've always talked about; make memories that last forever; have a family and build our kids a tree house while we sneak in it at night and have some alone time while they are sleeping.”
I giggle at the idea. “I want that too. All of it.”
“I love you.”
“I love you more.”
“I love you forever and I mean every word because…”
My heart stops when he pulls away from me and in slow motion, I see him drop to the floor on one knee, never taking his eyes from mine, and when he takes out a small black box from his pocket, my heart restarts with a beat so strong my hand flies to my chest as if I have to hold it in place. The volume of the music seems to quieten down—or at least I think it does—and everyone watches—or I believe they do.
This isn’t happening. Is it? A rush of something I’ve never felt before takes over my body and whatever it is, I want to feel it forever as tears fill my eyes. “Adam…”
I gasp when I latch eyes on the ring. It’s my grandmother’s: the one I adore and the one she promised me one day that I would wear when my prince gets down on one knee. If only she was here now to see that it’s happening.
“Everly Rose Braithwaite, I love you more than life itself and can’t imagine my life without you in it. I want everything with you because I believed that even at the very age of fourteen when you walked into my arts class, I knew you were my girl and I’d be your guy. You lit up my world from that very moment and you have done so ever since, and I knew that very day that our love will last forever. So, will you do me the honour of becoming my beautiful wife?”
I’m nodding before he finishes, and the tears roll down my face. “Yes!”
An explosion of cheers erupts around us and my teary giggle follows as Adam slips the ring on to my finger before standing to kiss me. I want to hold on to him but people keep interrupting us with congratulation handshakes and hugs. When I finally get him, I wrap my arms around his neck and beam. “We’re getting married.”
“We sure are. You have no idea how nervous I’ve been.”
“How did you get the ring?”
He wipes a stray, happy tear from my cheek. “A little help from your dad.”
“He knew?”
“I spoke with him the other day when you were out shopping with your mum. He knew tonight would be the night.” He pulls me tighter. “And now you’re my hottest fiancée.”
Fiancée. I’m going to be a wife. Adam’s wife. Mrs Knight.
“That sounds so good yet so strange.”
He rests his forehead on mine, still looking at me. “Are you happy?”
“I’m so happy I could burst. I love you.”
“May I cut in?” We pull away to find Jamie standing at the side of us, holding two glasses of whiskey. Offering one to Adam he says. “Ad’s I know things have been a little tense these last few days and I agree I was a dickhead, but I just wanted to say congratulations to you and Everly and that I hope you’ll accept this drink as an apology.”
As much as I am pleased that Jamie appears to be trying, alarm bells ring for me. There has to be a catch somewhere. However, I squeeze Adam’s arm, ready to give Jamie the benefit of the doubt, and say quietly, “New year, new start. There’s no harm in being civil.”
“Exactly,” Jamie says, pushing the drink a little further towards my man.
With a reluctant sigh, Adam accepts the drink. “Fine. But this is your last chance. Don’t fuck it up.”
“You can count on me. And once again congratulations. She’s a lucky girl.”
“I think I’m the lucky one,” Adam adds, giving me a wink.
I kiss Adam on the cheek as I plan to head outside. “I’m just going out to ring my parents before the phone lines get crazy and I can’t get hold of them. Are you coming?”
“Can he come out in a second?” Jamie answers politely. “I just want a brotherly chat. It won’t take long.”
I look at Adam and he raises his eyebrows as if he, too, can’t believe this new, friendly-sounding Jamie. “You go on ahead, babe. I’ll be out real soon.”
“Okay.”
I weave my way across the dance floor with a smile on my face and a bounce in my step. I can’t wait to share the news with them. I know my dad won’t have told mum of Adam’s plans as she loves surprises. Wrapping my arm around my stomach to try and protect myself from the cold winter night, I dial their number. Fireworks rocket into the night sky, filling the darkness with colour as the stars twinkle above them. Leaning against the large oak tree that is centre along the pathway, I watch the display take place.
“Hello.” My mums voice chirps down the receiver.
“Hey, Mum. Happy New year.”
“Everly, darling! Your father and I just tried calling you but we couldn’t get through. Are you having a good time?”
“Am I on speaker? Put me on it.”
“Oh, right. Robert, dear. How do I do this speaker thing Everly is asking about?”
“Press the button.” I hear Dad say in the background.
“What button? That one?”
“No, you’ll cut her off. That button there—the one that says speaker.”
“Nothing says speaker; it’
s just icons.”
I can’t help but giggle while listening to the pair of them. Mum and technology don’t mix and I can visualise her looking at the phone as if it’s some foreign object she’s never seen before. I’m bursting to tell them the news. I could quite frankly squeal it from the top of my lungs so everyone in the Lake District will know just how goddamn happy I am.
“Press the icon, Mum.”
“Right, Everly. We are good to go.”
“Can you both hear me?”
“Yes, darling. Are you both having fun?” Dad says.
I bounce on my heels, beaming from ear-to-ear. “The best time ever. And you’ll never guess what just happened?”
“Has it snowed?” Mum questions with excitement. She loves that dreadful stuff.
“Way better than that. Adam just asked me to marry him!”
The phone line is suddenly filled with a loud, happy squeal from my mother as Dad’s chuckle blends in between her excitement. I can’t help but laugh at her exhilaration as fresh tears of happiness mask my eyes.
“Oh sweetheart, congratulations. We are both very proud of you. Both of you. Oh Robert, how lovely.” Now her own emotions begin to take over as she continues. “Tell me all about it. How did he pop the question?”
“No doubt with romance and sweet words after our man-to-man conversation the other day. I was both honoured and proud that he kept with tradition and came to me first. Not many youngsters do that these days.”
“It was perfect.” I smile. “Everything about it was perfect.”
“Where is the man himself?” Dad asks. “Is he there?”
“Yeah, he’s—” I turn around to face the hall to where Adam is still inside but come face-to-face with Jamie who stands watching me. “He’s inside at the moment. Probably responding to everyone’s best wishes. I just wanted to come out and ring before the lines got busy.” Jamie’s stare is unnerving, and when he rakes his eyes down my body, an unpleasant chill cascades down my spine.
“Right, well you go back and have fun and we’ll speak to you both tomorrow.” Dad says as Jamie takes a step towards me.
“O-okay. I love you both.”
“Love you too, darling,” Mum replies. “And congratulations once again. Your love is like no other. You’re a very lucky girl. Chat soon.”
With that, the line goes dead and the excitement that was just bubbling inside of me feels like it’s popped as Jamie stands in front of me. The man who was not long ago inside trying to make amends seems to have disappeared, and I now have the unpredictable man back as his eyes once again run down my body. “Jamie? Is everything alright?”
“Sweet, little Everly. Why out here all alone?” Looking around, I see that I am now on my own when only minutes ago there were people out watching the display of colour filling the sky.
“I was just calling my parents. I’m heading back in now.” I go to step past him, but he blocks me. I try to move to the other side, but again, he blocks my movements. My chest tightens. “Jamie, please move. I’d like to get back to Adam.”
“Adam is busy getting shitfaced; I wouldn’t worry about him.” He steps closer causing me to step back. I’m now caged between him and the large oak tree, my heart now pounding with his unwanted proximity and my body creeping into a cold sweat as his breath hits my neck.
I need to go.
“Jamie I’d like to go please.”
“But I wanted to congratulate you in person like I’ve just done with Adam.” His voice is gravelly. “But also, to say that you’re making a big mistake.”
I’m trembling, only it’s not from the cold—it’s from fear.
Looking over his shoulder, I see Adam through the window of the hall, laughing with the boys, and I want nothing more than for him to come find me. Jamie has never liked mine and Adam’s relationship because he believes I took Adam away from him, but no amount of the fear that runs through me right now will stop me from expressing what I feel. “I’m not making a mistake. I love him. Why do you hate me so damn much?”
A grin spreads across his face. “I don’t hate you, Everly. I want you.”
My body tenses. When he reaches out to touch my face I slap his hand away with aggression. “Don’t touch me.”
As quick as lightening, he grabs me by the throat, pinning me against the large oak tree as red-hot panic runs my veins, but it’s the words he growls in my ear that makes me feel like blades have sliced my stomach. “I want a piece of this fine fucking arse you tease me with. I want to know what it’s like to have sweet Everly Braithwaite around my cock while she begs.”
My stomach rolls as bile clogs the back of my throat. I don’t like this feeling inside of me. I have to get away. Fast. With all the strength I can muster with his large frame over me, I lift my knee in force and hit him hard. He grunts painfully and doubles over, giving me the chance to escape. Making a run for it, I focus on Adam through the window of the hall as I head back to him.
But I’m too late.
The vicious grip on my hair burns my skull as he grabs me from behind. I cry out, but my plea is shut down when his hand covers my mouth, lifting me off the ground in his tight muscled grip.
No. No. No.
A rush of hot terror burns through me, knowing the fate. Tears blur my eyes as I thrash out, kicking and scratching at his arms, screaming through my muffled cry for him to let me go. But he doesn’t.
I want Adam. I need Adam.
I want someone to see us, but we’re alone. Fireworks fill the sky once more in roars that drown out everything that’s happening.
I’m ice cold with fear.
My heart is rapid, my head is spinning and for a second, all sense of time stops before I feel a deep blow of his fist to my stomach, causing stars to form behind my eyes, and every ounce of air exits my lungs as I’m thrown to the ground. I thrash out and shriek through the tears with every ounce of strength in me when his dead weight straddles me, fighting against the strikes I give him, but he’s too strong.
“GET OFF ME! I DON’T WANT THIS!”
My arms are pinned above my head, his eyes fixated and evil as his face gets close to mine. “Shout all you like, little bitch. No one can hear you.”
I spit in his face, but the blow to the back of my head is agonising when he smacks me against the concrete. His callous hand covers my mouth in a bruising act as I shout, scream and sob under his hold, digging my nails into his skin, thrashing my body to try and break free, begging for him to stop but it’s no use. My body unwillingly begins to shut down with my fight when his dense frame completely covers me.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t move.
I want Adam.
“I’m a man that never fails to get what he wants,” he growls in my ear. “I don’t stop until I get it.”
And just like that, my world of bright colours, happiness and love is taken away and filled with unbearable darkness and terror as he rips into me, taking everything from me.
My heart.
My soul.
My life.
Everything.
5
Adam
It’s been twelve weeks since I had the best Christmas a guy of my age could have; twelve weeks where my own family has made it even clearer that I’m slowly becoming a distant part of their lives; and twelve weeks where I have found that no matter what, I have a new family in the Braithwaite’s. It’s been twelve weeks since the girl of my dreams said yes to becoming my wife and twelve weeks since I last remember feeling alive.
I don’t know what is happening or how it’s even got to this point, but in just eighty-four days my world has changed into something I never thought was possible. Life now has become a dark cloud of never-ending questions and discomfort as I try to recap time and time again what actually happened after I got down on one knee and proposed.
She’d been happy.
She’d been excited.
She’d been my beautiful girl who could talk to me about any
thing.
Then, like an electric current had hit our relationship, that girl had changed. Talking turned to arguing, making love changed to hardly holding her at all, sitting next to each other went to her not even being in the same room as me. Seeing her beautiful smile every day turned into to barely seeing it at all.
And the final, gut-wrenching blow, confirming that I’ve somehow really fucked this up, is finding her engagement ring on the table in the wood cabin with a note to say she is sorry but that she can’t do this anymore and not to look for her.
I hold it in my shaking hands as the tears slip down my cheeks. My heart feels like it’s been ripped out of my chest. I’ve looked everywhere—begged her parents to tell me everything and anything, but they, too, are just as distraught.
It just doesn’t make sense.
Why does none of this make sense?
This ache from knowing she’s gone is unbearable. It’s crippling.
I’ve struggled for weeks to get back what we have somehow lost but have failed myself and her when I couldn’t. I just don’t understand. In a matter of weeks, my life has slowly fallen apart right in front of me and now my heart is shattered into tiny pieces as pain radiates through me.
Dropping to my knees, I clutch onto the engagement ring and crumple the paper like it’s the only thing I have left. And it is.
The rawness in my chest suffocates me in every way as my tears fall with no control. I hurt everywhere. I can’t breathe and I don’t think I ever will again as all traces of my girl are gone.
My beautiful Everly has gone and I’ve no idea why.
She never told me why.
6
Everly
Ten Years Later.
“Goddammit,” I growl, throwing my paint brush across the room and letting the red acrylic splatter across the floor and merge with all the other colours. The frustration inside of me is beyond annoying as I’ve been trying to perfect this painting for the last four days—it’s now nothing but a mess. I’ve never spent so much time on a piece of art where it’s still nowhere near finished.