by Ward, Alice
“Thank you, Reverend,” I replied as I stepped outside.
I have a feeling I’ll need all the prayers I can get.
CHAPTER 4
“Stand still… that’s a good boy.” I scrubbed Thunder with a soapy sponge while Matt tied Liberty to the hitching post.
“Mason said he’d do this for us,” Matt told me. “He knows we need to get packed for tomorrow.”
I dipped the sponge back into the bucket, shaking my head. “You can go ahead and take off if you want. With all the training and paperwork I’ve done this week, it feels good to actually have my hands on the animals. Besides, I finished packing last night.”
“Actually, I’m already packed too,” Matt confessed. He sprayed Liberty down with the water hose and lathered her in shampoo. “I’m so excited about this weekend. Lucas and I went shopping in Grand Junction yesterday and bought the most amazing clothes for the trip.” He rubbed Liberty down with a sponge while I hosed suds off of Thunder.
“I’m so glad Lucas changed his mind about coming with us.” I tossed the water hose his way and covered Thunder with my own concoction of coconut oil and vanilla extract to keep the horseflies and gnats away.
“Once James bailed on the rodeo, there was no real reason for him to stay home,” Matt explained.
“I didn’t realize James was supposed to ride with him this weekend,” I said, trying my best to keep my voice casual. I hadn’t told Matt that I’d yet again slept with James after swearing I was done with him forever. I knew Matt loved me, but I also suspected that his patience was wearing thin with my constant back and forth love life.
There’s no point in talking about it right now, anyway. James promised he’d give me until after Belmont to decide what I want. There are so many things to take care of between now and then, the expansion, the wedding… Bradley. Surely once all that has settled down, I’ll feel less emotional, more capable of making a decision.
Matt sprayed Liberty off with the hose and lowered his voice. “Look, Willow. I don’t want to upset you. But James told Lucas that he’s planning to leave Colorado soon. They were supposed to go to a rodeo in Boulder this Saturday. They were going to team rope, and James was going to bull ride... it’s a PBR qualifier. Lucas says James is only a few points shy of joining the tour.”
“Are you serious?” I asked, doing my best to act shocked. “I can’t believe he’d leave the ranch. Surely he plans to stay until after the wedding, at least?”
“He’ll have to stay for a few more months at least, now,” Matt assured me. “Lucas says that the next qualifier isn’t until August. I’m really surprised that he decided to go to Maryland with us. Not that I’m complaining. I’m thrilled that Lucas gets to go.”
“James didn’t decide to come with us. Daddy and Renee told him he has to. Reverend Hawthorne said we should spend quality time getting to know each other,” I said, my voice thick with irony. “God, I’m burning up. Spray me down, would ya?”
It was ninety degrees outside with no breeze. My jeans and t-shirt clung to my skin, drenched with sweat. I turned around and Matt sprayed cool water across my back. I turned back to face him, twisting the cold water out of my shirt.
“Well, I’m glad James is going, whatever the reason,” Matt told me. “Now, you’ll have more time to change your mind before he leaves for good.”
I untied Thunder’s lead rope and led him towards the barn. “Please don’t make me get in to this again,” I pleaded. “Think about it from a business perspective. We’re partners now. You have just as much to lose as I do, and none of the reward.” Thunder and I stepped into the barn with Matt and Liberty following close behind.
“My reward is seeing you happy,” he corrected me as we stalled the horses. “And we don’t have to get in to this again, but I thought you needed to know about the Professional Bull Riding Tour. Lucas says...” He hesitated, biting his lower lip.
I shut the door to Thunder’s stall and stared Matt in the eye. “Lucas says what?” I pressed.
Matt swallowed and looked down to the ground.
What could he possibly be so afraid to tell me?
“Lucas said that once James leaves on the tour, he’s not planning on coming back,” he answered softly.
He didn’t tell me that. He mentioned the tour, but he never said he’d leave forever. He wouldn’t.
“Well of course he’ll come back,” I insisted. “This is his home. He wouldn’t just leave Renee. If nothing else, he’ll come back for holidays.”
Matt shook his head. “That’s not what he told Lucas. James said that being here, having to act like you’re all a happy family is just too hard for him. He feels like he’s living a lie. I’m sure he’d come home eventually. But if you let him leave, I wouldn’t expect to see him again for at least a few years.”
James said he wanted to join the tour, that he needed some space. But he never said anything about not coming home… Lucas must have misunderstood.
“Thank you for letting me know, Matt,” I said with a long sigh. “But if James wants to leave, there’s nothing I can do about it. He’s a grown man. He makes his own decisions.”
Matt threw up his hands in defeat. “Okay, I promised I wouldn’t push it, so I won’t. What are you doing tonight? Lucas is staying at his place to get everything lined out before we leave. You should come over. We’ll have a few drinks and you can help me narrow down my wardrobe for the weekend,” he suggested as we walked out of the barn. “My suitcase could use some lightening up.” He leaned against his truck and I stood in front of him, shading my face with one hand.
I thought about the evening in front of me and frowned. “I can’t. I have to go to a stupid fucking dinner with Bradley.”
SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! I can’t believe I said that out loud!
I wasn’t used to keeping secrets from Matt and I’d completely forgotten that he didn’t know about Bradley’s blackmail.
Matt’s forehead wrinkled with confusion. “You’re going to dinner with Bradley? How did that happen?”
I thought fast. “It’s a business dinner and he wants to make a good impression. I promised I’d go as a favor to Dale. He’s trying to retire, but he won’t be able to if his contacts don’t take Bradley seriously.”
He raised a suspicious eyebrow. “That was awfully nice of you.”
I shrugged and put my hands on my hips. “It’s just dinner, it’s no big deal. But if I’m going to be on time, I need to get up to the house and shower. I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”
“Okay…” Matt hesitated. “Willow, if Bradley does anything that makes you uncomfortable tonight, I want you to call me. I’ll come pick you up, no matter what time. After what he did in Kentucky, I don’t like the idea of you being alone with him.”
“I’ll be fine,” I assured him. “And if I’m not, you’ll be the first to know.”
***
At five to seven that evening, I pulled into the parking lot of the Gas N Sip. I was surprised to see Dale’s Mercedes waiting at the gas pump instead of Bradley’s Ranch King. I parked on the side of the building and walked to the front of the store.
He’s not even going to get out of the car.
I opened the passenger door of the sedan and slid onto the leather seat.
“You look good,” Bradley told me as I buckled my seatbelt. “I’m relieved to see you in a dress. I was half worried you’d show up in some god awful denim skirt, just to spite me.”
I’d taken a lot of time choosing my outfit for the night. I didn’t want to look sexy, but I didn’t want to look frumpy either. I finally decided on a simple, sleeveless black dress with a high neckline and knee length skirt. The last time I’d worn it was to a funeral, so it seemed an appropriate choice for my fake date with Bradley.
“I don’t want to spite you, Bradley. I don’t want to argue or fight… I just want to get the night over with,” I told him, careful to keep my voice even. I’d psyched myself up during my drive to the Gas N Sip and
I was determined not to let Bradley get the best of me.
“Let me tell you how this is going to go.” He continued as if I hadn’t said anything at all. “We’re meeting the guys at Lawson’s Steakhouse.”
I nodded. “Good choice, they serve our beef.” Lawson’s was one of a few local restaurants that bought full sides of beef from our ranch.
“Feel free to throw that out there over dinner,” he said. “Fit it in somewhere casually… or better yet, wait until they complement their steaks.”
“Okay,” I sighed and stared out the window.
“You need to get your attitude in check before we get there,” he snarled. “I’m doing a favor by keeping my mouth shut. Don’t make me regret it.”
“I promise as soon as we get to the restaurant, I’ll plaster a smile across my face and leave it there for the rest of the night. I agreed to do that. I didn’t agree to play nice while we’re alone and I don’t know how you could expect me too,” I hissed back at him. Bradley kept his eyes on the road and his body relaxed.
“Fine,” he said with an amused laugh. “Act like a bitch if that’s what you want. But when we get to Lawson’s, I don’t want to hear a trace of that condescension in your voice. I expect you to act completely enamored by me, like you’re hanging on to every word I say. They’ll ask you about the horses. Give brief, modest answers and turn the conversation back to me.”
“I thought you wanted me to impress them,” I argued. “How the hell am I supposed to do that if I’m acting like some dumb puppet? Wouldn’t they take you more seriously if they thought a smart woman was actually choosing to spend time with you?”
Bradley frowned. “These are old fashioned men we’re meeting with, Willow. They were raised in homes like mine, where men are men and women understand they should be seen and not heard. The Derby win makes you a bit of a novelty, so they might pretend to be interested in your opinion. But they’re not, so save them the trouble and do what I told you.”
“Fine, I’ll smile, drool over you, and keep my mouth shut. But you’re over exaggerating, no one thinks like that anymore.”
“Plenty of family’s still have good, traditional values,” he insisted. “You wouldn’t know that since you grew up without a mom and your fool ass father let you run around like a little boy. Don’t get me wrong, I love Cole. But he didn’t do you any favors.”
He’s hitting below the belt on purpose. He wants me to snap so he has an excuse to post the pictures. I have to keep my cool. I’ve got to get on his good side or this entire evening is going to be a nightmare.
“What happened to you, Bradley?” I asked softly. “You were always such a nice guy… too nice. I know it wasn’t all a front. Why have you been so angry these last few months?”
“Because I got sick and fucking tired of waiting around for you to see what was right in front of your face,” he exclaimed. He made a fist and pounded the steering wheel. “Damn it, do you know how frustrating that was for me? When you moved home from college, I figured it would only be a matter of time before you got tired of shoveling horse shit and realized it was time to settle down. We could have been great together, Willow. I could have taken over for both of our fathers when they retire…”
“That’s why you wanted to be with me? So you could combine our family’s assets into some sort of agricultural superpower?” I asked, my voice full of disbelief.
“Well, I was attracted to you too, for what it’s worth,” he sneered. “But you took care of that. Mark my words Willow. Ten years from now, you’ll regret losing your chance with me. You’re going to end up bitter and alone when you could have had a respectable family.”
“Something tells me I’ll be okay,” I snorted. We passed a road sign and I was relieved to read that Durango was only five miles away.
Seven minutes tops and we’ll be at the restaurant. This charade works both ways. He’ll have to be nice to me in front of the other guys.
“You asked what happened to me. I could ask you the same,” Bradley said. “You used to be so level headed, so practical. Suddenly, you’re carrying on a sleazy affair with the very last person you should even think about being with. Seriously Willow, James is rodeo trash. Even without the weird brother sister thing thrown in, he’s bad news. What the hell happened to you that you can’t see that?”
“For the record, there’s nothing sleazy going on. James and I are two consenting adults and we’re in no way related. If the timeline was reversed and Daddy and Renee had gotten together after James and me, no one would have had a second thought about it. You’re blowing this whole thing out of proportion,” I said defiantly. I sat up straight in my seat and held my head high.
“If that’s true, why are you here?” Bradley asked.
I slunk back into the seat and stared out the window. I knew Bradley was right, and couldn’t think of anything to say in my defense. I saw lights in the distance and was relieved that soon, I’d at least be able to escape the car.
“That’s what I thought,” Bradley said smugly.
The road widened to four lanes and streetlights lined the shoulders. We drove past a small residential area and into downtown Durango. I spotted the neon sign for Lawson’s Steakhouse a few blocks down the road.
“All right, Willow, remember the rules. If you play your role, this should be relatively painless.”
I sighed and resigned myself to the hell of the next few hours. I checked my makeup in the visor mirror as Bradley pulled into the restaurant’s parking lot.
“Don’t get out, I’ll come get you,” he instructed as he took a space near the front door. He parked, got out of the car, and circled around to open my door.
I doubt anyone is watching us. This is probably overkill. But at least he’s being too nice again, instead of a royal jackass.
Bradley opened my door and offered me his hand. I accepted it and stepped out of the car.
“Are you ready, sweetheart?” he asked with exaggerated sweetness.
“As I’ll ever be, honey doodle,” I replied. I gave him my best fake smile, took his arm, and we walked into the restaurant.
***
“So Willow, Bradley here tells us that you think your horse has a chance at the Crown. Tell me, how much equity do you still own in him?” Charles McMullen, the elder of the McMullen brothers, asked me. Charles looked to be in his late fifties or early sixties. He had pale skin, grey eyes, and ash blonde hair that was gray at the temples.
“Just five percent,” I said with a modest smile. “Mondo was born at my ranch. I couldn’t bear to part with him completely.”
“I hear that five percent equity is a standard clause when you sell a horse or a stud service,” Wyatt McMullen, the younger brother added. I only knew he was the younger brother because that’s how he introduced himself. His features were nearly identical to Charles’s.
I nodded. “I take pride in what I produce. A lot of time, effort, and thought go into putting together a perfect breeding pair. I think that’s worth five percent of whatever the foal turns in to.”
Bradley nudged me under the table and I realized he thought I’d spent too much time talking about myself. We’d been at the restaurant for twenty minutes, and this was the first time I’d spoken other than saying a brief, near silent hello.
“That shows good business sense,” Wyatt told me. “I wish my wife could find a hobby like that. It would kill two birds with one stone: she’d be out of my hair for a few hours a day and she’d be contributing a little money to the household.”
Hobby? Did he really just call my work a fucking hobby?
I took a long sip of my wine and steadied my rapidly fraying nerves. “Yes, it is nice to have something to occupy myself with while Bradley works all day,” I said, my voice sugary sweet. “He’s been working so hard since Mr. Miller decided to retire. I’m so proud of him.” I put my hand over Bradley’s and stared at him with adoration. He smiled back at me.
“Thank you, sweetheart. It’s so n
ice to know you appreciate everything I’ve been doing lately.”
Wyatt grabbed a stuffed mushroom from our appetizer tray and popped it into his mouth. “She’s a smart girl, Bradley. She knows the harder you work, the better off she’ll be.”
Great. I have to keep a dumb smile on my face and mind my manners like a lady while this guy talks with food in his mouth.
Charles nodded. “You definitely have a keeper here, kid. Not only is she a looker, but she also knows just how to bump up against the line without crossing it.”
I probably don’t want to know what he’s talking about.
I knew I should let his comment pass without clarification, but curiosity got the better of me.
“You’re both very kind,” I told the brothers. “But which line exactly are you talking about?” I was careful to keep my tone amused instead of defensive.
“The man woman gender role line, of course,” Charles explained. “You want to be a part of the racing world, but you know your place. You breed the horses and then sell them to men who are capable of turning them into champions. I think your independent streak is just the right size, Willow.”
I took another long drink of my wine, still determined to keep my cool.
I can do this. It’s just one night, and then I’ll never have to see these pigs again. I wonder what their wives are like. Surely they can’t be happy. I hope they don’t have daughters.
I wanted to tell them that I planned on proving myself more than capable of turning my horses into champions. I wanted to tell them that my mother had done the same and that they could kiss my ass. But I realized that Bradley was right. These men didn’t give a damn about anything I had to say. Taking a stand wouldn’t accomplish anything, so kept a smile on my face and pretended to be gracious.
“What a lovely compliment. Like I said, the horses give me something to do while Bradley is running the farm. I keep telling him he should slow down and enjoy life a little, but he’s determined to make his father proud.” I laid the praise on thick and was amazed that the McMullen brothers bought every word. They looked at Bradley with a blend of surprise and admiration.