by Ward, Alice
“He was interested in a lot more than that,” James snapped. “And you seemed to be enjoying it.”
I opened my mouth to argue and Renee stepped out onto the porch.
“There you are,” she said with a hurried smile. “If you want your dinner hot, you better get in here.”
Damn it, I just need a few more minutes. I have to make him understand. If he stews on it for the next hour, it will only get worse.
“Sorry, Mom,” James replied. He moved past me and stepped into the house. I had no choice but to follow and hope for the best.
CHAPTER 5
I stood on the porch of James’s cabin, pounding on the door. “James… I know you’re in there. I watched you walk home, remember?”
My knocks went completely ignored. James had barely said a word during dinner. He told our parents that he had a headache and excused himself the moment Renee cleared the dishes. I was desperate to explain myself, so I grabbed a bottle of Advil from the cabinet and told Daddy and Renee I was going to check on him.
“I know where Daddy keeps the spare key,” I warned as I knocked again. “One way or another, you’re going to talk to me.”
The door swung open and James greeted me with a glare. “I don’t think we should talk right now, Willow,” he said through a clenched jaw.
I pushed past him and walked into the living room. “We have to,” I insisted. “You completely misunderstood what happened in front of the barn. That was Colby Spencer, his family owns…”
“I know who he is,” James growled, slamming the door. And it was pretty clear what he was doing here.”
I was too upset to sit down, so I paced the room while James leaned against the wall. “He came to look at the horses,” I told him again. “As soon as he showed up, I told him that nothing was for sale. He still wanted to see them. I couldn’t be rude. I gave him a tour of the barn and explained that my program is closed. We talked about Belmont for a few minutes and then… he just kissed me.” I left out the part where Colby had invited me to stay with his family in the Hamptons. That detail wasn’t going to help my case.
James stared back at me, his eyes cold. “You didn’t give him any reason to think you wanted him to kiss you?”
“Of course I didn’t. I love you,” I reminded him. “I was polite, but I didn’t flirt with him. And it’s not like I could tell him ‘sorry, I have a boyfriend’.”
“Yeah, because heaven forbid that news gets out,” he snorted.
I threw my arms in the air in frustration. “You know why we’re still keeping this a secret.”
“I thought I did,” he replied. “But now, I’m starting to wonder. Maybe you don’t want to tell anyone because you want to keep your options open a little longer.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
Where the fuck does he get off…
“I’m sorry but if I remember correctly, I’m not the one who may be having a child with someone else,” I bellowed, my face hot with rage. I crossed the room and stood directly in front of him with my hand on my hips. “I also seem to remember finding Katelyn wrapped around you at that rodeo. So you don’t get to throw a fit because some guy kissed me on the fucking cheek,” I finished, poking him in the chest.
James wrapped his hand around mine with a tight grip. He stared at me, his eyes suddenly sad instead of angry.
“I’m sorry,” he said. He dropped my hand and looked away. “I know none of this has been easy. And I know most of that has been my fault.” He massaged his temples with his palms and moved towards the recliner.
“When I saw you with Colby, I was furious as hell. I can’t remember ever feeling so jealous. But over dinner, I had another thought.”
I sat in front of him on the coffee table and crossed my legs. “What was the second thought?”
James sighed and stared out the window. “I thought I can’t blame you if you want something less complicated. Let’s face it, Willow. There will always be a good reason to keep our relationship a secret. First it was racing season, then Cole’s heart attack, now Katelyn. I’m absolutely sure that baby isn’t mine, but as soon as this crisis clears up there’s bound to be another one. And if you were with someone like Colby…”
“I love you, James,” I said quickly. I took his hand and he met my gaze.
“I love you too, Willow,” he replied, his dark eyes full of sadness. “But I’m not sure that’s enough anymore. And I know if that paternity test comes back positive, it will be the end for us.”
It was my turn to sigh because I couldn’t argue with him. I still wasn’t sure that James and I could have a future if Katelyn had his baby. I stared at him and saw the same despair I felt radiating from his face.
“I know you’re sure you’re not the father. But have you thought about what you’ll do if you’re wrong? How would you raise a baby with Katelyn and still be with me? And how the hell would we explain ourselves to the kid once it gets old enough to understand that most people don’t date their step-siblings. Have you thought about any of this?” I asked.
“I haven’t thought much about it,” he replied. “Because I know it’s not my baby. But all of those questions you just asked have easy answers. If the baby is mine, I will be there for it. I’ll pay child support, get visitation, and treat Katelyn with respect. But I don’t want to be with her, Willow. And when the baby is old enough to start asking questions, I’ll give honest answers. But if the test is positive and you’re not ready, I’ll understand that too. All I want is for you to be happy, Willow.”
It was a good answer, but I wasn’t satisfied. Mainly because I wasn’t sure I was ready to be a part of a child’s life. I felt much more equipped to be an aunt than a stepmother. But then, I stared into James’s eyes and imagined them on a tiny, squishy face. I remembered how wonderful he’d been with Jase and Josie and thought about what it might feel like to watch him with his own child. I realized then that wasn’t something I wanted to miss.
“I love you, James,” I said again. “And I can’t imagine my life without you. You don’t have to worry about Colby Spencer or anyone else. In fact, while I was talking to him, all I could think about was you… he was charming, he was attractive… but he wasn’t you. And you’re the only man for me.” I crawled into James’s lap and he wrapped his arms around me.
“I’m sorry I threw such a fit about Colby,” he said, kissing my forehead. “I love you so much and the sight of him with his lips on you was more than I could take. If the parents hadn’t been home, I’d have marched down there and told him exactly where he could stick his lips.”
“We’ll probably see him in New York next week. If you’d like to stake your claim then, be my guest,” I said. I nuzzled my face to his neck and planted a soft kiss on his jaw.
He pulled away and stared at me with a wide grin. “Do you mean that? Because I’d love to.”
I nodded. “Your mom and I had a long talk at lunch the other day. She kept going on and on about how much she wants us to be a happy family. I felt so damned guilty I almost told her about us right there in the restaurant. She said she loves me and wants to show me what it’s like to have a mother. She’s getting too attached to the idea of me as her stepdaughter. She needs to start seeing me as her…” I couldn’t say the word out loud.
“Her what?” James asked, his eyebrow pointed in amusement.
“You know what.” I blushed. “I mean… we haven’t exactly talked about the distant future… but…”
“I know,” he agreed. “I was just teasing you. But since we’re talking about it now, I agree with you. Mom needs to stop thinking of you as her stepdaughter and learn to see you as her daughter-in-law.”
“So you’ve thought about it?” I asked. My heart beat quickened with excitement.
Oh my God, if I could go back in time a few years and tell my high school self about this…
“Of course I’ve thought about it,” James replied. “From the moment I realized I was in love wit
h you, I knew that it had to be all or nothing. We can’t exactly break up and get away from each other, given our circumstances. I’m in this for the long haul, Willow.”
“Because you’re stuck with me anyway?” I teased.
“Because you are the most beautiful, amazing woman I’ve ever met,” he replied, his voice soft but serious. He pulled the neck of my t-shirt over my shoulder and kissed my collarbone.
“Because when you walk into a room, the whole world stops in the best possible way,” he continued, his mouth moving up my neck.
“Because when you look at me, I feel like I could conquer the world. I didn’t know it was possible to feel this way, Willow. Not until I met you. And I never want to let you go.” He kissed me and I tasted my salty sweat on his lips.
“God, I must smell awful,” I said, pulling away. “I was in the pasture all afternoon. I should have taken a shower before I came over.”
“You’re not that bad,” James assured me with a smile. “What were the parents doing when you left the house?”
“Daddy was pretty tired. Your mom was doing the dishes and then I think they were going to bed… why?”
“I was just wondering if they’d notice you’re not back yet. Sounds like they won’t, so how about I run you a bubble bath?” he suggested, squeezing my ass cheek.
I raised my eyebrows. “A bubble bath?”
“I picked some up the other day,” he confessed. “I was hoping we’d get a chance to enjoy it together.”
“I could go for that,” I agreed, feeling my body already beginning to stir. I climbed out of James’s lap and he stood.
“There’s a bottle of Pinot in the fridge. Why don’t you pour us each a glass and meet me in here?” he suggested as he walked into the bathroom.
“I can do that,” I called after him.
I heard the bath water rumble through the pipes as I opened the refrigerator and retrieved the wine. I popped the cork and filled two plastic cups before racing to join James in the bathroom.
The room was dim, with soft candlelight flickering across the walls. James was already in the tub, his body covered in thick, jasmine scented bubbles. I handed James his wine and sat mine down on the edge of the bath before pulling off my clothes. James watched me undress, his eyes smoldering with desire. He offered me a hand and I stepped into the small, narrow tub.
“Settle down in front of me and I’ll give you a massage,” he directed.
I sat between his legs and leaned back against his chest. James dipped a washcloth into the bubbles and gently rubbed it up and down my body.
“There’s not much room in here,” I observed as he struggled to move his legs.
“I know,” he agreed, squeezing the washcloth against my neck. The hot water ran down my spine, relaxing my exhausted muscles. “When we build our house, I want the biggest tub money can buy,” he said.
I smiled and moved my hips, rubbing my back against his hard, slick cock. “That sounds perfect. And I want a shower like the one in our Baltimore suite.”
James gathered my hair in his hands and brushed it over my shoulder. He leaned forward and kissed the top of my spine. Shivers ran through my body as he moved his hands to my shoulders.
“You’ve been so stressed lately,” he observed, massaging my muscles. “And I’m so sorry. But things are about to get much better, baby. I can feel it. We’ll tell the parents before we leave for Belmont. The trip can be the beginning of the rest of our lives.”
My heart smiled at the thought of walking into Belmont Park as James’s girlfriend. I was no longer afraid of anyone else’s opinion. I knew plenty of people would gossip and whisper behind our backs. But I also knew that if Mondo won the Triple Crown, the people who mattered in the industry wouldn’t give a damn who I was sleeping with. They’d pay through the teeth for the select horses I chose to part with while I was building my bloodline.
“You feel more relaxed,” James said, kissing my shoulder. “What are you thinking about?”
“Walking into Belmont Park on your arm, with nothing to hide. What are you thinking about?”
He kissed my other shoulder. “Carrying you into my bedroom and having my way with you,” he whispered into my ear. His hands moved around my chest and he gripped my breasts roughly. “Any thoughts?”
“I think I could get on board with that,” I cooed. I took a sip of my wine as James climbed out of the tub. He toweled off quickly and then offered me his hand. I stood up and he wrapped a towel around me before lifting me into his arms.
“I’m starting to notice a trend,” I teased as he carried me through the living room. “You always carry me to bed.”
“If I had my way, I’d never let you go,” he said, pushing open the bedroom door. He deposited me on the mattress and I rolled out of the towel. I slid up to the headboard and James lay down beside me. I crawled into his lap and stared down into his eyes.
“I’m all yours baby… forever,” I whispered. I held his face in my hands and kissed him softly. I felt his stiff cock throb between my legs and reached to the drawer for a condom.
“I want you, right now,” I said, staring into his eyes. I opened the package and reached between us, rolling the rubber down his shaft. I planted my knees on the bed and lowered myself down on his cock. I settled into his lap and then stilled, relishing the feeling of having him inside me.
“Oh God Willow, you don’t even have to move,” he moaned. He caressed my face and kissed me gently, holding himself back and then thrusting his hips up just once. “It feels so good, just being inside you.”
I kissed him again and then tightened my pussy muscles for a quick second. James groaned and his breath quickened.
“Just think, James. We have the rest of our lives to do this,” I whispered, my voice husky. I raised myself a little and then slammed back into him.
“Oh Willow,” he moaned again. He put his hands on my ass and pushed in deeper. He leaned back against the headboard and I dropped my lips to his neck.
I squeezed him again, this time a little longer, and then released. His cock grew even bigger inside me and I lost the will to hold myself back. I bounced up and down on the mattress, coming down harder with every thrust. James gripped my ass tighter and buried his face between my breasts. He licked and teased them as I speared myself over and over again with his cock. I cried out as I climbed to my release.
James took one hand off of my ass. He brought it to his lips, licked his fingers, and circled around to my backdoor. No one had ever done that to me before, and I was shocked by how willing I was to try it. He teased the hole cautiously and breathed into my ear.
“Tell me if you want me to stop,” he whispered.
“Just go slow,” I moaned in reply.
He gently pushed one finger inside and I was consumed with sensations I’d never had before. I’d never felt so full, so completely consumed by someone. I lost control of my body and fell into James’s chest. He lifted me up and down on his cock and my body exploded in the most powerful orgasm I’d ever had. I felt his body soaked beneath me and for a split second, I wondered if I’d lost control of my bladder.
“Oh my God, Willow,” he moaned. “Do you feel how much you just came? That is so hot.”
He pulled his hands away and rolled me onto my back. The comforter was damp beneath me and I marveled at the sensations still rocketing through my body.
“I think… I’m still coming,” I moaned beneath him.
“Yeah, baby?” he moaned, jackhammering into me.
“Yes… yes… oh God…”
My toes curled and my legs spasmed as I clamped my pussy muscles again. James cried out and then with a soft grunt, collapsed beside me on the bed. He held me as my body continued to spasm. It took almost five minutes for my muscles to calm.
“That was amazing,” I said, my breath still labored.
“You’re amazing,” James corrected me. He kissed my shoulder and offered me a bottle of water. I accepted it and too
k a long drink while he wiggled between the sheets. I handed the water back to him and moved to leave the bed.
“Where are you going?” he asked, taking me by the arm.
“Home,” I replied. “I can’t stay here tonight, remember?”
“I’m not ready to let you go,” he insisted, pulling me into his arms. I slid between the sheets and curled up on his chest.
“I’m not ready to go,” I confessed. “But I can’t fall asleep here.”
“Just stay a little while longer,” he pleaded.
It didn’t take much to convince me.
I won’t fall asleep. As soon as I feel myself drifting off, I’ll get up and go home.
“Fine… just a little longer,” I agreed. I nuzzled into James’s neck and listened contently to the sound of his breath.
***
“What the fuck is going on here?” Renee demanded.
Her loud voice startled me awake and I bolted upright in the bed. Sunlight was shining through the bedroom windows and Renee was standing in the doorway. Her hands were on her hips and her face was red with fury. My heart raced and my mouth felt like it was full of cotton.
“Renee… what are you… this isn’t…” I stammered, pulling the blankets up to my neck.
“Save it, Willow,” she snapped. She stormed across the room and shook James awake. He stirred, but didn’t open his eyes.
“James Parker, wake the fuck up right now,” she yelled into his ear.
James opened his eyes and the color immediately drained from his face. “Mom,” he croaked. He cleared his throat and sat up, leaning against the headboard. I felt trapped. I knew the last thing Renee wanted to see was James and me in bed together. But my clothes were in the bathroom, so I couldn’t exactly run away.
“What time is it?” James asked, rubbing his eyes.
“What time is it?” Renee repeated, her voice full of frustration. “I walk in on this and the first thing you have to say is what time is it?”
“Mom, I’m sorry,” James said. “I wanted to tell you. We were going to tell you... but then Cole had his heart attack and… I never wanted you to find out this way. What are you even doing here?”