‘I’m not busy.’ Jamie’s face brightened. ‘How were the boys this morning?’
‘Great.’ Janet smiled.
‘Did they eat their porridge?’
‘They won’t consider eating anything else now. It’s a competition to see who gets the highest average of toenails before you visit again. I have to keep a chart on the breakfast table and they mark each one and then count them up at the end. Rory asked for a second helping this morning.’
Jamie looked pleased. ‘That’ll do them good. Nothing wrong with lots of porridge.’
‘It’s doing their maths skills some good at the same time.’ Janet caught Jamie’s eye. ‘You’re a natural, Jamie.’
‘A natural what?’
‘Parent. You seem to know the right thing to do and say without even trying.’ Janet tried not to sound resentful. She’d never had anybody to tell her whether or not she’d been doing a great job in the early years of being a mother. She’d learned her parenting skills the hard way—by trial and error.
Jamie straightened proudly. ‘Do you think so?’
Janet looked at Jamie again. Giving the praise had been worthwhile. She could see the pleasure she had clearly given him. ‘I know so. I may not be as old and wise as you, but I’ve had a bit more practice at the parent thing.’
Jamie nodded. Then he smiled rather poignantly. ‘I had no idea how well I was doing.’ He reached out and touched her hand. ‘Thanks for that, Janna.’
Janna. No one else had ever used that diminutive of her name. And Jamie hadn’t used it since he’d reappeared in her life. It was more than friendly. The intimacy of the private name curled around Janet’s abdomen and squeezed deliciously. Jamie’s hand was still touching hers and she couldn’t look away. If she turned her hand over, she could return the touch. She wanted to return it—and more.
‘You’re welcome,’ she said softly. ‘And it’s true. You’ve only known the boys for a couple of weeks. They think you’re wonderful.’
‘They’re wonderful kids. You’ve done a great job.’
‘Thanks.’ Janet’s hand turned and she squeezed Jamie’s fingers gently.
‘They talk about you all the time,’ Jamie added. He didn’t try and remove his hand. ‘Except when they’re talking about how much they want a dog.’
Janet laughed. ‘They can be very persistent when they’ve set their hearts on something. I’ll bet you hear about it every time you take them out.’
‘Sure do.’ The pressure of Jamie’s hand enclosing hers increased as he grinned. ‘On the trip to Orana Park the wolves looked like dogs. At the Antarctic Centre they wouldn’t leave the husky exhibit. Even the movie I took them to was a dog story.’ Jamie’s tone became serious. ‘They should have a dog, Janet. It would be good for them.’
Janet pulled her hand free. The moment of closeness had gone. She could sense potential criticism of her parenting. ‘We couldn’t possibly keep a dog. I work long hours. It wouldn’t be fair.’
‘So stop working long hours. If you only worked part time, you could be home for the boys after school and in the holidays and you could let them have a dog.’
‘I can’t afford that.’
‘You can now.’ Jamie’s stare was intent. ‘I can help.’
‘I don’t want your money,’ Janet said sharply. ‘I’m not going to lose my independence. How long do you think I could rely on you, Jamie? What happens when a better offer comes up and you walk away? Where would that leave us?’
‘I’m not going to walk away,’ Jamie said impatiently. ‘Maybe you should learn to trust me.’
‘Oh?’ Janet stepped back, her face tense. ‘Like last time, you mean?’
Jamie looked angry now. ‘Yes, like last time,’ he said menacingly. ‘If you hadn’t been so bloody—’ He broke off as Sandy knocked on the half-open door. She was grinning.
‘Constance Purdie is here,’ she announced. ‘Shall I bring her through?’
‘Yes, please.’ Janet nodded quickly. She didn’t want to hear what Jamie had been about to say. What further blame he was going to lay at her feet. He still seemed to consider their break-up to have been her fault. What a nerve! They both needed to step back and cool off before their acrimony made it impossible for them to work together.
Constance Purdie was tiny, only a little over five feet tall. She had a round face and tightly permed white hair. She walked with only the aid of a walking stick. Her daughter, Hope, had never married and was a younger version of her mother. Her permed hair was grey instead of white and as yet, she needed no help in walking.
Jamie was smiling again. ‘I don’t believe this is your daughter, Mrs Purdie,’ he said. ‘You look like sisters.’
Constance Purdie beamed at Jamie. ‘You’re a very charming young man,’ she announced. ‘Are you married?’
‘Mother!’ Hope Purdie remonstrated.
‘It’s all right, dear.’ Constance allowed Janet to remove her jacket and help her onto the bed. ‘He’s too young for you. I was thinking more about wee Janet here.’
Janet smiled, shaking her head. ‘Let’s get these shoes off, Constance. And your stockings.’
‘I don’t know why you’re making such a fuss about my feet, dear. They don’t hurt a bit.’
‘Ulcers can get nasty if they’re not looked after properly.’ Jamie was putting on a pair of surgical gloves. ‘And Janet tells me you’re a very special patient, Mrs Purdie.’
‘You can call me Constance,’ she told him. ‘And what’s your name, dear?’
‘Oh, I’m sorry,’ Janet apologised. ‘This is Dr Jamie McFadden. He’s filling in for us while Josh is away.’
‘Where’s Dr Cooper?’
‘He’s on his honeymoon, Mother. I’ve told you that already. Several times.’ Hope Purdie had settled herself on the chair at the foot of the bed.
‘Don’t snap at me, child,’ Constance reprimanded her daughter. ‘I’m not senile yet.’ She turned an alert gaze on Janet. ‘It’s about time you had a honeymoon yourself, Janet Muir. What’s wrong with this young man? Looks like a strapping lad to me.’
‘Mother!’
‘Oh, all right.’ Constance tutted irritably. ‘I just can’t understand you girls these days. So fussy! Look at my Hope here. It’s going to be too late for her if she doesn’t get a wriggle on.’
Jamie caught Janet’s eye. She could see the amusement bubbling in his face. Neither of them dared look directly at Hope who was sending distinctly mutinous messages with her body language. A wriggle of any sort seemed highly unlikely.
‘Can you feel this at all, Constance?’ Jamie was prodding the sole of the old lady’s foot with a disposable toothpick.
‘Can’t feel a thing,’ Constance assured him. ‘I told you it was nothing that needed a fuss.’
‘Janet was quite right to make this appointment for you,’ Jamie told Constance. ‘This is quite a big callus and it has an ulcer developing underneath. We need to remove the hard skin on top, clean things up and then put a dressing on it.’ Jamie took the tweezers Janet was holding. ‘This should be completely painless.’
Jamie worked quickly, removing the dead skin and debris, exposing a surprisingly large ulcerated area. ‘We’ll flush this with saline,’ he told Janet, ‘and then give it a fizz with some hydrogen peroxide and flush it again before we put a dressing on.’ He glanced at the shoes lying beside the bed. ‘You’re going to need some footwear that will help protect your feet,’ he told Constance. ‘Something with plenty of toe room, a shock-absorbing sole and laces so you can adjust the level of support. Trainers are ideal.’
‘Trainers? You mean those stripy things the runners wear?’
‘Aye.’ Jamie nodded. He watched as Janet flushed the ulcerated area with the second dose of saline and nodded again approvingly. ‘Nice and clean. Let’s put on an impregnated dressing and some Tegaderm. It’ll need a dressing change every two to three days for a while.’
‘I’d like some of those shoes,’ Constanc
e announced. ‘I think we’d better go shopping, Hope.’
‘Not today, Mother.’
‘No time like the present.’ Constance wagged her head and smiled at Jamie. ‘At my age, you have to get on with things. If you wait it might just turn out to be too late.’
‘Absolutely,’ Jamie agreed. He looked at Janet and winked. She smiled back, grateful that the tension between them had evaporated. Constance Purdie and her daughter left a short time later, and Jamie shook his head admiringly. ‘That was a bit of a treat.’ He looked at Janet questioningly. ‘Do you suppose she really thinks there’s still time to get Hope married off?’
‘Age is relative, I guess.’ Janet smiled. ‘I hope I’m still that enthusiastic about life when I’m ninety-eight.’
‘I hope I am when I’m thirty-eight.’ Jamie grinned. ‘Right now I’d like to put my feet up and have a cup of tea. Have you got time for a break?’
‘I’d love one.’ Janet nodded.
‘Good.’ Jamie led the way to the staffroom. ‘You can tell me about another place I can take the boys to on the weekend.’
Janet tried to think as she filled the jug and put it on to boil. It had been two weeks since Jamie had asked to have time out with the boys by himself. Two weekends where they’d spent a whole day out together. Jamie had been to the house for dinner on another occasion and had taken Janet and the boys out to a pizza restaurant only two nights previously. The boys were loving it but had been suspicious on the first occasion. Janet had made sure they’d been dressed in clean clothes and had brushed their teeth.
‘Why aren’t you coming?’ Adam queried anxiously.
‘Because Jamie wants to spend some time just with you and Rory.’
‘Why?’
‘He likes you,’ Janet said casually. ‘Come here, I need to brush your hair again.’
‘Dennis never took us anywhere,’ Adam reminded her.
‘Dennis was a dork,’ Rory stated. Janet ignored the giggles.
‘Jamie’s not a dork,’ Adam said decisively.
‘No.’ Rory was quick to agree. ‘Jamie’s cool.’
‘So you’re happy about it, then?’ Janet asked.
‘About what?’
‘Going out with Jamie. Without me.’
‘Where are we going?’
‘Orana Park.’
The boys nudged each other gleefully. ‘Awesome!’
They didn’t even ask if Janet was going with them the next time, and Janet was startled by her reaction to seeing them drive off. She recognised the jealousy she felt and was dismayed. Had Jamie been right all along and she just had a jealous and suspicious nature? What was even more disturbing was that the jealousy wasn’t directed at Jamie for having the pleasure of a special outing with the boys. She felt jealous of her sons having the time alone with Jamie.
‘That tea is going to be completely stewed.’
Janet jumped. ‘Och, sorry. I was miles away.’
‘So, have you thought of somewhere for us to go?’
‘There’s the Crusaders game coming up. If you’re lucky you might be able to get tickets.’
‘That’s not for a couple of weeks.’
‘You don’t have to go anywhere special.’ Janet poured the tea carefully. ‘They’re quite happy to kick a ball around the park or even stay home. They want to try building a wooden maze for the rats. The cardboard one’s falling to bits.’ Janet handed Jamie the sugar bowl. ‘And they’re keen to finish the story you all started writing the other night in the restaurant.’
‘‘‘The Poisonous Pizza’’?’ Jamie grinned. ‘That was great fun.’
‘They want to write it down.’ Janet hesitated. ‘It’s just the sort of thing the remedial reading people encourage.’ She sipped at her tea, still standing beside the bench. ‘I had a call from the headmistress of their school yesterday. She wanted me to know how well the boys are doing at the moment. She said there’s been a huge difference in the last couple of weeks.’
‘Is that right?’ Jamie blinked in surprise. ‘You don’t think that’s got anything to do with me, do you?’
Janet nodded slowly. ‘I suspect it has everything to do with you, Jamie. Have you noticed they’ve even started talking with a Scottish accent?’
‘No.’ Jamie looked delighted. ‘Have they?’
‘Aye.’
Jamie laughed. ‘Do you listen to yourself, then?’
‘I don’t have much of an accent any more.’
‘Nonsense. Some things you can never get rid of. You sound exactly the same as the day I met you, Janna.’
Janet put her mug down on the bench. No, some things you could never get rid of. Like the way that name made her feel. Like the way she felt about Jamie McFadden.
‘It’s about time we told the boys, isn’t it?’ Jamie asked softly. ‘I mean, the truth about me.’
‘No. Not yet.’ Janet’s hand bumped her mug and some tea slopped over the side. She reached hastily for the dishcloth. ‘As you just told me, if you don’t do things in too much of a hurry, then you don’t get hurt.’
‘I prefer Constance’s philosophy,’ Jamie countered. ‘If you wait, it might just turn out to be too late. I want to tell them,’ he said firmly. ‘Soon.’
‘No!’ Janet tipped the rest of her tea into the sink. ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’
‘We have to talk about it,’ Jamie said grimly.
‘Not right now. I’ve got work to do.’
‘Tonight, then.’
‘No.’
Jamie caught Janet’s arm. ‘The boys are going to be told. If you won’t even talk about how and when, I’ll just go ahead and do it my way. Is that what you want?’
‘No,’ Janet whispered. ‘You know it isn’t.’
‘Then we’ll talk,’ Jamie said coolly. ‘Tonight.’
Tonight. The word hung over Janet for the rest of the day. She tried hard to keep up her normal level of enthusiasm but even the patients seemed to want to make life more difficult. Like Mrs Terence, who came in for her next pack of nicotine replacement patches and pep talk and promptly burst into tears.
‘I’ve started smoking again,’ she sobbed. ‘I can’t do this. I’m a complete failure.’
Janet handed over the box of tissues and drew her chair closer. ‘One little setback isn’t a failure, Mrs Terence. You’ve been doing so well. You can win.’
‘No.’ Mrs Terence blew her nose vigorously. ‘It was one little setback last week. On Monday I had three and today I’ve already had five. I feel so depressed about failing I just have to smoke.’
‘It’s not the end of the world,’ Janet said soothingly. ‘And it doesn’t mean you’re never going to be able to stop. It just means starting again.’
‘I can’t,’ her patient moaned. ‘Truly—I can’t face it.’
‘It doesn’t have to be today,’ Janet said calmly. ‘You need to feel ready and choose another time. Then we’ll start again. You might find you understand your difficulties better after this. It’ll make you stronger next time. Better prepared.’
Mrs Terence dabbed at her eyes. ‘Maybe I should try acupuncture instead. Or hypnosis. That might be easier.’
‘It’s never going to be easy,’ Janet warned. ‘All these methods simply help. Most people find the patches work better than anything else. You have to be ready, though. And you have to really want to give up.’
‘I do, I do. I hate myself for smoking,’ Mrs Terence said fervently.
‘Let me know when you’re ready to try again,’ Janet told her. ‘Don’t leave it too long.’
‘No, I won’t. Thank you, Janet.’ Mrs Terence smiled a little shakily as she left.
Mr Courtney came in next, accompanied by his wife. They were both large people but it was Mr Courtney’s blood test that indicated a high cholesterol level. Oliver wanted to try some dietary intervention as a first response. Janet’s initial queries about the Courtney’s dietary habits indicated that she had another uphill battle on her han
ds.
‘Fruit?’ Mrs Courtney echoed. ‘The only way Bernie eats fruit is if it’s cooked in a crumble and has whipped cream on top.’
Bernard Courtney licked his lips involuntarily. Janet got up to retrieve some pamphlets from her desk. ‘There are lots of good ideas for reducing saturated fats in these,’ she explained. ‘You don’t have to do it all at once. One small change every week is enough. Like using a polyunsaturated margarine instead of butter. Or removing all the visible fat from meat and the skin from chicken.’
‘The skin’s the best part,’ Mr Courtney protested. Janet glanced out of her window as she handed each of the Courtneys a pamphlet. Mrs Terence was standing outside on the footpath, lighting a cigarette. Janet sighed inwardly and sat down.
‘Let’s go over these ideas,’ she suggested, ‘and we can talk about the best way to get started.’
The cases that followed the Courtneys fortunately needed little in the way of counselling. Janet checked peak-flow readings for asthmatic patients, took blood tests and pressures, gave injections and changed dressings. Between patients she was in and out of the main office and the side room, but she deliberately kept contact with her colleagues brief.
Sandy was doing her job brilliantly and needed little assistance. Sophie was coping well enough but was still subdued and looked pale. Oliver and Jamie were positively cheerful. They were chatting together in Oliver’s office when Janet went to get a glass of water from the staffroom. She heard Jamie laugh as she passed the door and the sound made her flinch. Perhaps he was actually looking forward to their meeting tonight. He had stepped firmly into the lives of Janet and her sons and was now in a position to take control.
Jamie was coming out of Oliver’s room as Janet made her return journey.
‘Seven o’clock,’ he told her quietly. ‘You don’t have to feed me tonight.’
‘The boys go to bed at 7.30,’ Janet reminded him.
‘I know.’ Jamie’s gaze locked with hers. ‘It’s you I’m coming to talk to, Janet.’
Adam and Rory had no intention of leaving their mother alone with Jamie. They bounced around in their pyjamas and bare feet.
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