Chapter Thirty-Two
Like Melanie, Kate had spent quite a few Christmases alone. When she got to thirty, she decided that it was just tragic to keep going back to her parents’ house: the single daughter still sleeping in her old bedroom with a Duran Duran duvet cover on the single bed. So Kate made certain that each year after that she booked a fantastic exotic holiday for the Christmas week. It certainly helped ease the pain of hearing that Dan would not share his Christmas with her again to know that she would be spending Christmas Day on a beach.
That year would be very different. For a start, she had Ian now, though thanks to his fear of supermarkets, they had failed to score a turkey. Also, Kate’s mother’s illness had brought it home to Kate that she wanted to spend that Christmas with her family. Tess agreed that they should make that year a proper family affair, with all of them around the same table for the first time since Lily was born. She made it sound like a wonderful, jolly idea. The unspoken reason behind it lurked like the ghost of Christmas Future. The initial relief of hearing that their mother’s lumpectomy had gone well had soon dulled with the thought of the radiotherapy to follow. They were still a long way from getting the all-clear.
So, Kate and Ian drove down to the south coast on Christmas Eve. They were billeted at Tess’s house to save Elaine and John from having to do extra laundry. When they arrived, Lily was already on the naughty step, bargaining hard to keep her mother from mentioning the latest infringement to Father Christmas. Tess was hugely relieved when her sister appeared.
‘Here,’ she said to Lily, ‘you can drive Auntie Kate up the wall instead.’
Lily did not stop until ten in the evening, by which time all the adults wanted to go to bed themselves. Ian volunteered to tell the bedtime story, allowing Kate a few moments with her sister over the washing-up.
‘How’s Mum?’ Kate asked. ‘She keeps saying she’s fine, but you get to see more of her than I do. What’s the real story?’
‘She’s OK,’ said Tess. ‘Tired from the operation, of course, but I think that what’s stressing her out more is the idea that she might be having radiotherapy right around your wedding.’
‘Oh.’
‘She’s putting a lot of pressure on herself in that respect.’
‘She hasn’t said anything to me,’ said Kate.
‘Of course she wouldn’t. She doesn’t want to upset you.’
‘What exactly is she stressing out about? She doesn’t have to do anything for the wedding except turn up. It’s only going to be a small affair. With a stupidly big dress.’
‘I love that dress.’
‘You don’t have to wear it.’
Tess handed Kate another plate to dry.
‘Kate, you don’t think . . . No.’ Tess shook her head. ‘It isn’t fair of me to even suggest it.’
‘Suggest what?’
‘No, I can’t ask you. It’s so soon. It isn’t fair.’
‘Just bloody ask me!’ Kate laughed.
‘You don’t think you could hold back on the wedding for a month or two? To give Mum and Dad breathing space after all the hospital stuff. I know you’ve waited for a long time for this, Kate, and I wouldn’t ask, but . . .’
‘It’s fine. I understand.’
‘A couple of months, though? Oh, it’s nuts. You’re supposed to be getting married in March.’
‘It’s not such a crazy idea. I’ll ask Ian.’
Though she didn’t say it to Tess, Kate felt an odd sense of relief flood her limbs at the thought of an extra couple of months.
Kate asked Ian what he thought of the plan when they got into bed that night. He agreed, of course. How could he not? It wasn’t as though Kate was asking to postpone because she needed an extra month or two to lose enough weight to get into her frock. Still, Kate was surprised that he was so chilled out about it.
‘Are you sure? The wedding we’ve planned is only ten weeks or so away.’
‘Whatever makes you happy,’ he said.
Kate told her parents the following morning.
The television was on, showing the arrival of the royal family for the Christmas-morning service at Sandringham. Elaine was disappointed by the absence of Prince William and his fiancée, but she approved whole-heartedly when she heard that William was working and Kate was spending a last Christmas with her mum and dad.
‘She should make the most of it. Her life is going to be turned upside down. She’s going to be even more popular than Diana,’ said Elaine. ‘She’s got that same glow about her, but she’s seen enough of the world not to get swept up in all the hoo-ha.’
The news flashed to a shot of Kate and William announcing their engagement again.
‘Just seeing those two together warms the cockles of my heart,’ said Tess.
‘I can only imagine what pressure she must be under to organise such a big wedding so quickly,’ said Elaine.
Kate seized her opportunity.
‘Exactly,’ she said. ‘And to think I thought we could organise even a small wedding in a few months. Mum, Dad . . . Ian and I have been talking. We’ve both got a hell of a lot of stuff on at the moment. Ian’s busy at the office, and I need to prepare for my new job. I totally underestimated how much I would have to do. So we wondered if you would mind if we put the wedding back a little bit. Maybe until May?’
‘Oh, Kate,’ said Elaine, ‘why would you want to do that?’
‘We just think we could have a far better wedding if we had a little more time to devote to planning it.’
‘But . . .’
‘We’ve waited long enough, I know, and that’s why we’re not too worried about waiting for just a few weeks longer. We’re only going to do it once, so why not make sure it’s really special? And if we have it later, we can take a bit of time for a honeymoon too. I couldn’t disappear for a week so soon into my new job if we did get married in March.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘We’re sure.’
Ian nodded in agreement.
‘Well,’ said John, ‘I suppose it would give us one less thing to think about for the moment too.’
‘But it’s only ten weeks away!’
‘Exactly. Ten weeks and I haven’t prepared a thing.’
‘Haven’t you?’ Elaine looked stern.
‘Except the dress.’
‘All right,’ said Elaine. ‘If you think it’s for the best. Your father is right that I’ve been worrying that I can’t help as much as I’d like to because of all the hospital visits, but if you’re happy to wait until May . . . As soon as the radiotherapy is over, I am going to properly throw myself into organising a wedding for you.’
‘Mum, there’s nothing much to organise. We’re getting married at a register office and then we’re having lunch.’
‘You don’t have to have a small wedding because of me.’
‘Because of you?’
‘Yes. I know it’s not what you really wanted. You just scaled down your plans because you thought it would be more manageable with me being in and out of hospital.’
‘That’s not the case.’
‘Kate, I know you. I’ve known you for your entire life. I knew what you wanted before you even had the words to say it. I know that you don’t want your wedding day to be like any other day of the week.’
‘I’m really happy with what we’ve planned,’ Kate insisted.
‘Rubbish. Now that you’ve delayed it a couple of months, why don’t you let me put some effort into making it a really special day? We did it for Tess. Don’t you remember how lovely her wedding day was? It wouldn’t be right if we didn’t do the same for you.’
‘Even though we spent your wedding money on the patio,’ John chipped in.
‘That’s why I want to help with the organisation,’ said Elaine.
‘Really, Mum, Dad, I don’t want you to worry about anything. I just want you to concentrate on getting well.’
‘It won’t be a worry. It’ll be a pleasure. I’l
l always remember how excited you were when Charles and Diana got married. You were excited about it for weeks before it happened. You were crazy about that dress. You wanted a wedding just like that. And with the dress you’ve already bought, why shouldn’t you have your Princess Diana moment at last?’
‘Mum,’ said Kate, ‘a year after that wedding, I wanted to be Jayne Torvill.’
Chapter Thirty-Three
‘What do you think?’ Kate asked Ian as they were getting ready for bed that night. ‘Mum and Dad seem determined to get involved.
‘Well, let them.’
‘But they’d like us to get married down here.’
The conversation had quickly developed from a discussion of a mere change of date to the planning of an entirely different kind of wedding. Of course, Kate and Ian could have a London register-office wedding if they wanted to, but something on the south coast would be entirely easier for her parents to arrange.
‘I don’t mind,’ said Ian.
‘I thought you wanted to get married in London.’
‘I want to do whatever you want to do.’
‘Really? So you wouldn’t mind being married down here?’
Ian shrugged.
‘Tell me,’ said Kate. ‘Tell me please what your honest opinion is, because I have a feeling that Mum is going to run with this if we let her. If I know her, she’s already online looking for a coach and horses.’
‘I haven’t really thought about it.’
‘Your gut instinct, Ian. That’s what I’m after. I don’t want anyone to be upset or offended. We’ve got to tell Mum and Dad what we want and be really clear about it.’
‘I don’t know. I want you to be happy, I suppose.’
‘And I want you to be happy, but right now I have no idea whether it would make you happy to stick with our original plan or whether you would prefer we got married in a yurt.’
‘Not a yurt . . .’
‘Great. Not a yurt. But what do you think about Mum and Dad taking over? I mean, really taking over. Doing everything?’
Ian shrugged again. ‘I’m tired. Can’t we talk about it tomorrow?’ he asked. He rolled over. End of conversation as far as he was concerned. Kate counted cracks on the ceiling and fumed.
‘Whatever you want to do.’
Kate felt her frustration rising again. Ian thought he was being helpful when he said that, or a variation on it, every time she asked his opinion on what he felt like doing at the weekend or whether he wanted fish or chicken for supper or whether he wanted to sell both their flats and buy a house in between the Commons or splurge all the money on a year-long five-star trip round the world. He couldn’t be like that about their wedding too.
By teatime on Boxing Day, the wheels were in motion for a very different wedding than the one Kate and Ian had planned for March. John suggested a family walk to work off some of the food they had been stuffing in during the past twenty-four hours. The walk took them past the golf-course hotel where Kate had endured her first and last wedding fair.
‘We could ask if they have availability,’ Elaine suggested.
‘But . . . Mum . . .’
‘The food is good and it’s ever so reasonable,’ Elaine said to Ian.
‘The food’s not bad,’ said Tess, a little more guardedly.
‘Well, let’s go and see what they can do for us,’ Ian responded, ever happy to please.
Kate was open-mouthed.
‘No harm in just looking,’ said Ian.
‘Ian,’ Kate hissed, ‘you have no idea what you’re getting us into. The place looks like a Travelodge.’
Ian disagreed. To Kate’s astonishment, in contrast to her views, he said he actually liked the aesthetic of the jumble of buildings from different eras, and he was impressed by the Christmas tree in the lobby. It was tastefully decorated. That was a good sign. Ian was swung by the free mince pie offered with every full-priced Italian coffee. ‘Why don’t we just see what they can do, for comparison’s sake?’
Elaine was delighted.
‘We can do the ceremony and the reception,’ the hotel manager explained. ‘If you decide to have both, with a canapé reception between, we can do a very reasonable price. Just fifty pounds per head including half a bottle of wine and two glasses of champagne per guest.’
Kate saw to her surprise that Ian was nodding along, encouraged by her mother.
‘I like the sound of that,’ he said. ‘It would be nice and simple to have everything in one place. What dates do you have available?’
‘Well, we’re very popular. Most of the summer weekends are already booked up. We could do a weekday, but if you want a Saturday, then the only day we’ve got before October is the day after the royal wedding, 30 April. We had a cancellation.’
‘Well, we wouldn’t have to worry about getting time off to get ready,’ said Ian, thinking logically, ‘not with Easter right before and then the extra bank holiday.’
‘Oh, it would be so easy,’ said Elaine, ‘if you really were happy to get married down here, Kate. I could just take control. You wouldn’t have to worry about a thing except turning up on time. You could just concentrate on starting your new job like you need to. And it’s so much cheaper than London. You could have so many more guests at this price!’
‘My mother would be pleased to hear that.’ Ian nodded. ‘I’ve got a big extended family.’
‘What do you think?’
‘I think that anything that takes the worry off our shoulders is a great thing,’ said Ian. ‘I don’t want Kate to feel under pressure, especially with the new job.’
All eyes were now on Kate, who suddenly felt very much under pressure. Eager and anxious to please, everyone awaited her approval. Kate couldn’t find the words.
‘Three other brides have been considering the package you’re after for that weekend,’ said the hotel manager to break the silence.
‘Oh, you might lose it!’ said Elaine, betraying her own wishes in the desperation of her exclamation.
‘Then it’s settled,’ Kate said. ‘We’re getting married here, at a golf-course hotel.’
‘I can get a couple of practice rounds in the day before,’ said Ian, completely missing the sarcasm in Kate’s tone. He pulled out his credit card to put down a deposit for a canapé reception and three-course meal for 150 guests.
How had that happened? Kate asked herself that night in bed. How had her simple, chic city wedding become a ‘country-house-hotel’ extravaganza? It was just like the dress. The moment she saw her mother’s eager face, she was doomed. Kate could not disappoint her, especially not now.
But it’s my day. Wasn’t that what Kate was supposed to say? Everyone always bangs on about it being the bride’s day, but the fact was, it wasn’t Kate’s day any more, from the dress to the venue. Even Kate’s guest list was under scrutiny. Now that the potential invitees had increased from 40 to 150, her mother had mentioned at least a dozen family friends who would appreciate an invitation. None of this was what Kate had envisaged, and yet she felt that she couldn’t complain. Officially, it was her day, but she also wanted the day to reflect Ian’s desires. Ian seemed to want to get married on a bloody golf course! And then she wanted the day to make her parents happy too. If, as Tess had suggested, being more involved with the wedding would give their mother something to focus on other than radiotherapy, then how could Kate deny her the opportunity to take control?
‘You know that Mum will make sure it’s tasteful,’ said Tess.
Kate had a flashback to her encounter with the chair-dresser at the bridal fair.
It didn’t matter, Kate tried to tell herself. Nothing mattered except actually getting married and becoming man and wife. Man and wife? How about woman and husband? Kate thought. OK. Nothing mattered except becoming woman and husband. It really didn’t matter if the day didn’t reflect Kate and Ian’s personalities as long as they signed the register and everybody had a good time.
She rolled over to look at Ian. He
was sleeping soundly again. None of this seemed to bother him. He swore blind that he wanted to get married in that golf-course hotel, but Kate had the distinct impression that he would have married in a yurt, just so long as he didn’t have to make any effort to plan it. Increasingly, she began to think that Ian didn’t want to have to make an effort for any reason at all.
Chapter Thirty-Four
14 February 2011
‘How does he love me? Let me count the presents.’
That was Diana’s mantra on Valentine’s Day. For Diana, 14 February was every bit as important as Christmas and her birthday. Not for her the old-fashioned romance of an anonymous Valentine’s card. Diana expected a card, a gift (a significant gift) and an evening on the town. Ben knew not to disappoint. It wasn’t worth the grief. What Diana wanted, Diana got, starting with a lot more time off.
Diana had, as threatened, given up her part-time job right after Christmas. Since then she had thrown herself into wedding preparations. The blackboard in the kitchen formed the centre of operations. Every day a new to-do list appeared in neat white chalk letters. There was one column for Diana’s responsibilities and one for Ben’s. Ben couldn’t understand how, though he was still very much in full-time employment, he seemed to have easily as many items in his column as Diana did in hers.
‘Yours are just little things,’ she explained. ‘I don’t think you appreciate how much pressure there is on me. I’m not just planning a wedding; I’m planning the rest of our lives.’
Certainly, she appeared to have taken to micromanaging Ben’s time. They never seemed to have a night to themselves any more. Friday evenings were now taken up with dance lessons for that all-important first dance. They inevitably ended up in a row when Ben accidentally stepped on Diana’s toes. Meanwhile, Saturday nights now meant another bloody dinner party.
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