by Sarah Morgan
She ground her teeth. ‘Trust me, I’m indifferent.’
He nodded. ‘So what’s causing those black shadows under your eyes?’ He lifted a hand and stroked a finger down her cheek, smiling slightly as she shivered. ‘It’s the same thing that’s causing the black shadows under mine. And it’s called frustration.’
She glared at him. ‘And who is responsible for that?’
‘You.’ He smiled. ‘By refusing to marry me.’
‘I don’t want to marry you.’ She voiced the words automatically, but even as she spoke she felt the first flicker of doubt. Then she pulled herself together and lifted her chin, her gaze provocative and challenging. ‘I’ve told you, I just want hot sex with you.’
If she’d expected to shock him, she was disappointed.
He stepped closer to her, his blue eyes trapping hers. ‘You can have endless, scorching sex with me—’ his voice was a lazy drawl ‘—once we’re married. Just say the word.’
‘I’m not that stupid, Tom.’ She backed away and shifted the pack on her back. ‘And I’m not that desperate.’
She thought she heard him mutter, ‘But you will be.’ She chose to ignore it, stomping up the path at an increased pace, trying to ease some of her mental and physical frustration through exercise.
An hour later they’d climbed to the top of a ridge and Sally paused. ‘According to Sean, this was where the dog went over.’ She glanced around and then took several steps over. ‘Look—she’s left a hat. She obviously panicked and didn’t collect all her things. So we’re definitely in the right place.’
Tom squinted around, his strong legs braced as he steadied himself against the wind. ‘Can’t see anything or anyone.’
‘Well, if the dog went over there …’ Sally peered over the ridge ‘… then I suppose she would have tried to get down to the bottom, which means she would have taken this path upwards and then down to the right.’
Tom looked at her. ‘That’s only if she knows the territory as well as you do.’
‘If she’d gone straight over the edge, we’d see her body,’ Sally said reasonably, ‘and the chances are that she approached from the other direction anyway, so she’d know that there’s a path that leads down to the bottom.’
Tom nodded. ‘OK. Lead on.’
They found the woman crouched on the edge of the path further along, staring into the sharp drop.
As they approached, Sally called out a warning, anxious that their sudden arrival didn’t startle the woman.
‘You’re too close to the edge.’ She hurried up to the woman and gently coaxed her away from the precipitous drop.
‘She fell.’ The woman’s face was chalk white and her eyes were full of tears. ‘She was bouncing along the path, playing, and suddenly it just fell away. She scrabbled frantically and yelped and then she just disappeared.’
‘And she’s on a ledge?’
The woman nodded, her lower lip caught between her teeth. ‘You probably think I’m crazy, making all this fuss about a dog. But she’s all I’ve got.’
Sally gave her shoulder a squeeze. ‘I don’t think you’re crazy. And we’ll get her for you. Just make sure she stays still on that ledge.’
‘I’m trying to …’ the woman’s eyes filled ‘… but she wants to get back to me and she keeps jumping up.’
‘Well, at least she’s fit enough to jump,’ Sally said practically, taking various bits of equipment from Tom as he removed them from his rucksack.
It occurred to her that in almost every aspect of their lives they worked together almost by telepathy, each responding to an instinctive knowledge of what the other needed.
Reminding herself that she wasn’t going to think about what she needed, Sally moved alongside Tom and wriggled into a harness. She clipped on a karabiner and attached the rope.
‘I’ll abseil down to her,’ she said quietly, and Tom nodded, checking the knot on her rope.
‘Don’t do any of your fancy tricks, Jenner.’ His tone was light. ‘Just get the dog and leave, got that? No social chit-chat. None of your free climbing or flash moves.’
She smiled mockingly, paying out the rope and stepping towards the edge. ‘I might hang around if the view is nice.’
She abseiled skilfully and confidently down the side of the mountain and stopped by the ledge where the little dog was trapped.
As soon as the dog saw her, she started to wag her tail frantically.
Sally saw the danger instantly and gave a gasp of dismay. ‘Stay! Sit! Oh, help, you’re going to fall, you silly thing.’ Seeing the dog’s back legs slide off the ledge, she lunged across and grabbed it by the collar, just managing to secure it before it plummeted down to the valley floor.
Her heart was thumping so hard she thought it might explode out of her chest. ‘Don’t do that to me again,’ she scolded, drawing the dog towards her and attaching the harness and the rope. Satisfied that the dog was safely attached, she indicated to Tom that she was ready for him to lift the dog, and then concentrated on climbing back up to them.
Back on the ridge the woman collapsed on the little dog, hugging her tightly.
‘I can never thank you enough for saving her. I saw what happened. If you hadn’t caught her when you did … She’s all I’ve got.’ She buried her face in the dog’s coat and closed her eyes.
Sally unfastened the rope. ‘Well, I did catch her, so let’s not think about it.’
The woman gave a sniff. ‘She doesn’t even seem injured. She was so lucky to land on that ledge. If she’d gone over …’
Tom put a hand on her arm. ‘As Sally said, let’s not think about it. Come on. Let’s get you off this mountain. The weather is closing in.’
But before they reached the bottom another call came from Sean, reporting four boys overdue from a walk.
They agreed that Tom would rendezvous with the rest of the team and Sally would continue to the bottom and take the woman and the dog safely to base.
Initially relieved to be away from the temptation of being near Tom, Sally glanced at the sky and suddenly felt a twinge of disquiet. There was a storm brewing and it had all the signs of being a bad one.
It would mean a difficult and potentially dangerous rescue for Tom and the rest of the team.
Dragging her eyes away from the building cloud, she concentrated on guiding the woman and her dog to safety.
An hour later she climbed on her bike to ride home from the base and then looked at the weather again and decided to wait.
She wouldn’t be able to relax, knowing that Tom was out there.
She needed to be at the heart of what was happening. And it wasn’t as if he ever needed to know that she’d stayed.
Sean was inside, on the radio to Tom and Oliver. ‘According to the parents they were headed for the ghyll—start there.’ He glanced up as Sally walked into the room. ‘I thought we’d got rid of you.’ He lifted an eyebrow in a silent question and she gave a rueful shrug, trying to look casual.
‘I thought I might hang around here with you. You’re going to need some moral support with the parents. They’ve just arrived and they look as though they need coffee …’ Her voice tailed off under Sean’s steady gaze.
‘Sally.’ His tone was firm as he lounged back in his chair. ‘Just marry the man and stop all this messing around.’
Colour touched her cheeks. ‘I don’t know what you mean.’
He sighed wearily and stabbed his fingers through his cropped dark hair. ‘The whole community knows what I mean. At the moment neither you nor Tom have your mind on the job in hand and I don’t want distracted people out there on the fells. Sort it out. Say yes to the guy, Sally. Then Tom will stop drinking my whiskey and you’ll stop staring at me like a puppy worried that his master won’t come home.’
Sally bristled. ‘He isn’t my master.’
‘But you’re worried he won’t come home.’ Sean’s gaze fixed on hers. ‘Heaven knows, I’m no expert on emotions, but doesn’t that tell
you anything, Sal? The fact that you’re still sitting here in this boring building where nothing is going to happen for hours. Doesn’t that tell you something?’
Yes.
But she didn’t want to hear it. She wanted to ignore it.
She swallowed, aware that Sean was looking at her expectantly.
She gave a helpless shrug, knowing that denial was a waste of time. ‘All right! I know I love Tom,’ she said finally, ‘but I’m scared, Sean. Really terrified—and too scared to risk it all again. Do you have any idea what it was like? Trying to live without him?’
‘Seems to me that you’re living without him at the moment anyway, so how much worse could it get, Sally?’ He let out a long breath and pulled a face. ‘Let’s look at it another way. You were the bravest kid I ever knew. When you were thirteen, Tom and I used to bawl at you to use a rope, and every time we turned round you’d be up that rock-face with a grin on your face and absolutely nothing holding you there except your fingers, your feet and your incredible determination. What’s happened to those guts, Sally?’
Her lips felt stiff. ‘I still free climb.’
He nodded. ‘I know you do. So that’s still one risk you’re prepared to take. What about other risks? Why are some risks worth taking while others aren’t? With Tom you’re too wary to even put a foot on the rock-face.’
She couldn’t answer him, shaken by the analogy that he’d used.
She’d never thought of herself as a coward.
Sean ran a hand over the back of his neck. ‘Why do you climb?’
‘Because I love it. Because I can’t not climb.’
‘And if you fell one day?’ He looked at her. ‘Would you still climb?’
She frowned and then nodded. ‘Yes. Of course I would. It’s a part of me. Of who I am.’
‘And so is Tom. And that’s why you’ll never be happy unless you’re with him.’ Sean glanced at the clock and made a move towards the door. ‘Enough psychology. It isn’t exactly my forte, but when I see two people I love making a mess of things, I have to interfere. That’s what comes of being married to my wife for so many years. And now I need to talk to the families of those children and you need to spend some time facing up to the truth, Sally. Don’t punish him for one mistake. You fell once, but your love for him is still there. You can’t live without Tom. He’s every bit as much a part of you as your climbing. And at some point you’re going to have to get back on that rock-face or you’ll have wasted your life by being too afraid to go after the one thing you want.’
He walked quietly out of the room and closed the door behind him, leaving her staring after him in silence, her thoughts clearer than they’d been for a long time.
* * *
It was the longest evening of Sally’s life and for the first time she understood how it must feel to be a relative with a loved one lost on the mountain.
Tom was a skilled mountaineer and he wasn’t lost.
But for some reason she still couldn’t stop worrying.
And suddenly she knew Sean was right. Tom was as much a part of her as her climbing. And she couldn’t live without him.
Sean was prowling anxiously around the base, and when the radio crackled to life he dived for it, expecting to hear Tom’s voice.
It was Oliver, and even though his voice crackled and broke up periodically, they could hear the tension in his voice.
‘We’ve got them. Tom saved one of the boys from going over the edge, but he’s fallen and he’s got a nasty gash on his leg. It’s bleeding like crazy. We need a helicopter.’
Sean swung into action and Sally sank down onto the nearest chair.
She knew that when the wind was this high it was unlikely that a helicopter would be able to take off, let alone land.
In between calls, Sean glanced across at her. ‘You’re white as a sheet,’ he said roughly. ‘Go and make yourself a hot drink. And stop worrying about Tom. He’s made of stern stuff.’
He went back to his calls and Sally wandered aimlessly around the base, waiting and worrying.
She wanted him safely back.
She wanted to tell him that she loved him.
Finally they had the news that the wind had dropped sufficiently for the helicopter to land and pick up Tom and one of the boys. The other three were well enough to be walked off the mountain by the remaining members of the team.
Sean smiled at Sally. ‘Get on the bike of yours and pedal to the hospital,’ he advised, ‘because that’s where your boyfriend is going to be heading.’
Without pausing to argue, she did as he’d suggested, grabbing her jacket and her helmet and dashing for her mountain bike.
She arrived at the hospital as the helicopter landed, and she sprinted for A and E.
Ben MacAllister, Ellie’s husband and one of the A and E consultants, was waiting for the helicopter. ‘No guessing why you’re here,’ he said dryly, holding open the doors so that the crew could wheel the stretcher inside. ‘Take him into Resus. And we’ll have the boy in that cubicle over there.’
Sally looked at Tom lying on the stretcher with his eyes closed and her heart lurched uncomfortably.
If anything happened to him …
They transferred him across from the stretcher and Sally slid her hand into his. ‘Tom?’
His hand felt freezing cold and she warmed it with both of hers, feeling weak-limbed and incredibly shaky.
His eyes opened and he winced slightly. ‘What are you doing here? Are you after my body again?’
‘I thought I might ravish you while you’re under the anaesthetic.’ She kept it light. This wasn’t the time to have the conversation she wanted to have. ‘I didn’t have anything else to do. I told Sean I’d keep an eye on you.’
He nodded, a faint smile touching his mouth. ‘My leg is killing me.’
‘You’ve cut it.’
‘Badly?’
Ben lifted the dressing and examined it. ‘Badly enough to give you a scar. Good job you’re not a swimwear model.’
‘All I want to know is whether it will ruin my chances of having a decent love life.’
Ben grinned. ‘Did you have a decent love life before?’ He poked around a bit more and then nodded. ‘It’s not as bad as I first thought. We can stitch it here. You’ll just be a bit sore walking up the aisle with Oliver tomorrow.’
Sally watched as Ben finished his examination, noticing how pale Tom looked.
How infinitely precious.
‘Were the kids OK in the end?’ Tom closed his eyes and his voice sounded weary.
‘Thanks to you, I gather.’ Ben glanced at the nurse. ‘Can I have some more light here, Nicky? It’s like working in a cave.’
‘Charming.’ Nicky, the A and E sister, rolled her eyes and adjusted the light. ‘I happen to prefer romantic lighting myself.’
Ben drew the edges of the laceration together, carefully aligning them to achieve the best result. ‘Well, I hate to disappoint you, but I don’t fancy Tom.’
Tom smiled, his eyes still closed. ‘I’m gutted. Mind you, I’m amazed you can even remember how to talk, married to Ellie. Having just spent a day on the mountain with her, my ears are still ringing. When do you get to practise talking?’
‘I practise at work,’ Ben said gravely, but his eyes twinkled as he carefully stitched the wound. ‘Because obviously at home I can’t get a word in edgeways. You’re still her hero, by the way.’
‘I don’t deserve it.’
‘Actually, I think you probably do.’ Ben’s tone was calm. ‘Ethan is a wonderful baby and we both know we would have lost him if you hadn’t operated so quickly. You didn’t hesitate. You got her to Theatre and you got our baby out before the situation had a chance to deteriorate. Other doctors would have hung around and waited.’
Tom still had his eyes closed but Sally thought she saw faint colour touch his hard cheekbones. ‘It was the quickest way I knew to stop Ellie talking,’ he murmured. ‘Anaesthetize her.’
‘W
ell, any time you need your leg sewn up, I’m your man,’ Ben said lightly, pushing the stool away and standing up. ‘I’m done here. Nicky will dress it more beautifully than I ever could. Take some painkillers, get home to bed and I’ll check it at the wedding tomorrow.’
‘Can I ride the bike?’
‘No.’ Ben ripped off his gloves. ‘If that’s your only option, I’ll give you a lift home.’
Tom nodded. ‘Thanks. I’d better take you up on that offer.’
Sally felt a flicker of desperation.
There were things she wanted to say to him.
Things she needed to say.
But he was already hobbling after Ben, taking the walking stick that Nicky had jokingly offered him.
Sally followed him to the door, holding it open so that he could pass through, wanting to stop him.
He turned to look at her, his handsome face pale and showing signs of strain. ‘Thanks, Sally.’ He gave a rueful smile. ‘I appreciate the moral support. I’m going to have an early night and see you at the wedding tomorrow.’
She opened her mouth to tell him that she loved him.
To tell him that she wanted to marry him.
But the door had already swung shut behind him.
He was gone.
CHAPTER NINE
‘I CAN’T believe I’m standing in this same church, wearing this same suit that doesn’t fit properly,’ Oliver muttered, sliding a finger round his collar to try and relieve the tension. ‘I wanted to get married on the side of a mountain.’
Tom looked at his brother and tried to ignore the throbbing pain in his leg. ‘Even you can’t expect a woman to exchange vows on the side of a mountain in freezing March.’
‘Well, obviously,’ Oliver grumbled, ‘that’s why I agreed to the church. Now I know why Jack was stressed when he got married. Why is she late? Why are brides always late?’
‘Calm down.’ But Tom’s eyes were fixed on the back of the tiny village church as well, although he wasn’t interested in the arrival of the bride. Just one of the bridesmaids.
He wanted to see Sally.
Last night, when he’d seen her pale-faced and anxious, waiting for him in the A and E department, he’d been completely swamped by love.