The Weakness in Me

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The Weakness in Me Page 5

by Josie Leigh


  “Were you drinking?” he accused, as he caught her before she hit the ground. “I know Missy’s parents don’t exactly police their liquor cabinet.”

  “No,” Sammy frowned at him in disapproval of his assumption and knowledge. “I’m just tired,” she yawned as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder to pull her up again. “I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to her and Patrick groping beside me,” she finished, burrowing into the warmth of Jason’s arms.

  “Your boyfriend was making out with Missy?” he stopped walking and looked down at her. “How are you so calm right now? And if you were doing homework, why was Patrick there in the first place?”

  “Ugh, you sound like an overprotective father right now,” Samantha sighed as they finally made their way into her back door and into the kitchen. Plopping down in a chair in the dark, she set her school bag against a leg of the table. “Besides, he was in our group for our history project. He had to be there, too.”

  “Okay…” Jason said, sitting down in a chair beside her. “That explains why he was there, but not why you aren’t carrying a clump of tangled blonde curls right now.”

  “Cause she did me a favor,” Samantha shrugged. “I wasn’t really into Patrick.”

  “Since when?”Jason’s face was close to hers in the dark, looking for something in her expression, but she was too tired to try and decipher it now.

  “I don’t know, like last week? I knew she liked him” she laid her head on her arms and looked up at him. “so I told her she could have him, but just this once. If she ever does it without my permission, we’re done.”

  “Okay…why didn’t you just break up with him first?” Jason laughed.

  “People don’t always break up before moving on to the next person, believe me. Besides, it seemed easier this way,” her eyes were closing as she felt Jason help her out of the chair and up the stairs to her bed. “That way he’s the bad guy. Missy said that it would be fun to play the scorned one and she could play the vamp. We’re going to fight at school tomorrow.”

  “Sounds like so much drama. Why not just let it go?” he asked, helping her lay on her comforter.

  “She said that’s how best friends act sometimes,” Samantha said, scooting up to settle her head on her pillow.

  “You’ve been my best friend for eight years now, Sammy. Have I ever asked you to fight with me like that for ‘fun’?” Jason’s voice took on a tone that was impossible to mistake as anything less than disapproving.

  “Yeah, but you are a boy and boys don’t play games like that. It’s part of why I love you,” she mumbled, tiredly, pulling him in for a hug. She felt him stiffen briefly at her words before relaxing into her embrace.

  “I love you, too, Sammy,” he kissed her forehead and both of her eyelids. He massaged the back of her scalp until she relaxed into her pillow. It was only then that she felt him get up from beside her bed. “I’ll see you in the morning,” she heard him whisper as he left her bedroom. She fell asleep that night comforted by remembering how safe she felt in Jason’s arms and wondering what it would be like if they could ever be more than just friends.

  **

  Over the next month, Jason spent more and more time with Sammy, assisting with Corigan’s care when he was off work and helping to prepare her yard for the winter that was quickly approaching. They’d completed the planting of the new garden just in time. Their first harvest was minimal but successful, as it was merely a test run on the plot of land he’d chosen. He’d added a carved wood sign in memoriam of Caleb as a surprise when they’d finished. The tears in her eyes and the fierce hug she gave him were all the thanks and encouragement he needed to only ever be a phone call away.

  Slowly, their friendship returned to the near close level it had been when they were kids, before all the hearts and flowers got in the way. The panic attack seemed to be long forgotten, even though he sensed that it had brought a change in Sammy he couldn’t quite pinpoint.

  Still another month away from being able to be released back to work, she slowly started trying to run her company remotely. He often found her asleep on the couch in her living room, her laptop lying sideways on her knees. Once Sammy was strong enough to spend more than fifteen minutes on her feet at a time, she started accompanying him on his weekly shopping trips for the house. She claimed it was about her not wanting him to buy any more bologna, but he suspected she was just tired of being cooped up.

  “I can’t believe how quickly you and Corigan can go through food! I feel like I was just here yesterday,” Jason laughed as she moved their cart into the next aisle. He could tell she was starting to get tired by the way she leaned on it as she walked.

  “It wouldn’t be so bad if you weren’t there constantly, eating us out of house and home! I swear, since we became friends again, my food bill has tripled!” she smiled, before shushing him and pointing to Corigan, who’d fallen asleep against his shoulder. Suddenly, Jason felt Sammy stiffen beside him and her slumped body straighten out in defense. He followed her eyes to the woman who’d just entered the aisle pushing a cart full of beer and snack foods. Before he could turn their cart around in retreat, they were spotted.

  “Samantha! Jason! Long time, no see!” Missy Crandell waved. Sammy moaned her displeasure. Jason was surprised she didn’t even bother to disguise her disdain for the tiny blonde making her way towards them. He couldn’t help but note that her white bare midriff tank top, with the leopard print bra showing underneath, and micro black leather mini skirt might not have been the most appropriate grocery store attire. Hell, it wasn’t the best attire to be out in the cold Pacific Northwest November air, either, but she didn’t show the tell tale signs of being chilly.

  ‘But, then again, her heart had always been made of ice, so this was probably… ’ his thoughts trailed off. Her sky-high heels left no doubt at her desperation to attract any single or attached man over the age of eighteen who happened to be shopping and noticed her bevy of ‘man-catching’ food and beverage choices. He shook his head at her audacity and looked back to Sammy.

  “Missy,” she hissed through her teeth, and Jason prepared himself for the battle he knew was about to ensue. This wasn’t going to be pretty. He knew he had to do something to defuse this situation before it got out of hand.

  “Isn’t this cute? Aren’t you two the picture of domesticity?” the woman sneered, laughing shrilly.

  “Jason’s just helping out until I’m back on my feet. I’ve got one more month of physical therapy, but he’s been a great friend, a real trooper,” Sammy said, coldly. Jason couldn’t help but be shocked at her words, considering how hard he had to fight her to be allowed back into her life. He knew she wouldn’t give Missy the satisfaction of knowing how deeply the blonde had wounded their bond all those years ago.

  “How long after Caleb died did you go running back to Jason, Samantha? It hasn’t even been six months; did you even respect his memory enough for the ink to dry on the death certificate?” Missy accused, folding her arms across her chest to push her boobs under her chin, as if she thought she needed to display them more than she already was.

  He felt Sammy tense beside him as his own hands, involuntarily, clenched into fists. If he was seeing red right now, she had to be seeing black. Jason knew he had to move quickly to stop her from throwing Missy into the stack of spaghetti sauce jars beside them, because he was contemplating letting her. Knowing that a scene with Sammy was exactly what she was looking for, he didn’t want Missy to have the satisfaction of thinking she’d ‘won’, when nothing was further from the truth.

  “You shouldn’t make assumptions about things you couldn’t begin to understand, Missy,” Jason couldn’t believe the hatred that was spewing from his voice. He couldn’t stop the words from falling out of his mouth like a cascade. “Like a decades old friendship and the loss you feel when someone you love more than life slips through your fingers at the hands of someone else’s plan for destruction,” he continued in a dangerously calm
voice, but pointedly as he shifted Corigan to his other hip.

  On cue, Missy startled back as if slapped. It was as if she hadn’t been expecting him to stick up for Sammy like this. If she thought for a second he was going to allow her behave to this way toward Sammy, she was sorely mistaken.

  “You say that like you think I don’t know how it feels to be in love,” she said, her pale green eyes narrowing.

  “Do you? Because if you did, you’d think twice about manipulating and demolishing every happy couple or man that makes the mistake of befriending you and trusting you,” Jason spat, with more venom than he knew possible. Seeing Sammy’s questioning gaze slice to him at his poisonous words, he knew he’d just stunned her speechless, and needed to finish this situation before she found her words.

  “If you’ll excuse us, I’m helping my friend do some shopping. She just lost her husband, you know,” he said, dismissively. “And being the paramedic that responded to the accident scene, I’ve gone out of my way to make sure my oldest friend has all the help she needs during this difficult time. I’m grateful that she’s let me help, so I’ll thank you not to spread gossip where it doesn’t exist. Sammy and her daughter deserve the opportunity to grieve in peace, without the pall you tend to cast over everyone. Don’t you agree, Missy?” Jason continued, summoning more patience for the woman who’d helped obliterate his life than he thought possible. Looking to the toddler sleeping on his shoulder, the source of his strength became obvious, and he planted a kiss on Corigan’s head.

  With a huff and a bright red face, Missy threw her curls over her shoulder and whipped her cart out of the aisle without another word.

  “What do you suppose has her all in a tiff?” Jason shrugged as if he were unaffected by the confrontation and moved with Sammy toward the next item on their list. He flicked his eyes to take in her reaction. The fact that he’d need a crane to lift her jaw off the floor was a good start.

  **

  “Wow,” Samantha gasped as she watched her former best friend/frenemy abandon her cart and walk out the front door of the store with her head held high. No doubt she was on her way to tell everyone that Jason Wright had just verbally eviscerated her in the ethnic foods section of Safeway over lost little Samantha Castle, now McKenzie. Right before she told everyone about how they were probably shacking up again, and how Samantha took back her leftovers, she thought sourly. Yet, all she was really left wondering about was where all the animosity for his former lover had come from and what his calculated statements really meant.

  “Now that that’s over with, shall we continue?” Jason said, tightly, picking up the jar of sauce they’d entered the aisle for in the first place.

  “What was that about? I didn’t think you hated her that much,” Sammy asked, scurrying to catch up once her shock subsided. “You were always quick to defend her in the past…” She couldn’t control the growl with her words over the woman who had a hand in destroying her relationship with Jason. Today, though, she was actually glad that even five years later, it hadn’t destroyed their friendship. In the last month, they’d experienced no hiccups with their arrangement. However, the ease of it all continued to scare her to no end.

  “I’ll never make that mistake again, Sammy, believe me,” Jason countered, his blue eyes smoldering in what Samantha thought was anger, but clearly seeing the resolve in his words, too. Hurrying after him, the first shadow of doubt over what Sara said she saw in their bedroom five years ago entered her head. Could she have been wrong all those years ago or had Missy and Jason’s break up been so vicious that he regretted choosing the blonde over her?

  “I can’t believe she just left her cart in the middle of the store like that! How is she going to live without those barbeque pork rinds that she was obviously buying for herself?” Samantha said with the perfect mix of sarcasm and disdain as they passed by the stranded cart. “She should’ve, at least, put the beer back in the cooler! No one wants to buy warm beer. Yuck!”

  “Sammy, you say ‘yuck’ to cold beer, too!” Jason laughed, continuing to maneuver through the store to complete their shopping.

  “While your statement is accurate, I also recognize that yeasty beverages may not be utterly disgusting to everyone. I understand that mine is not the only opinion in the world that matters,” Samantha bumped her shoulder into his, ignoring the pain that erupted from her hip at a teasing move that was so simple for her four short months ago.

  “How diplomatically stated, Sammy! Have you ever considered politics?” he asked, rolling his eyes and giving her shoulder and answering bump.

  After successfully maintaining her balance during the exchange, Samantha shot him a feigned horrified look, “After what Missy just said, I’d be a scandal waiting to happen. I’ll just stick to fixing other people mistakes and promoting their good qualities rather than having to finesse my own.”

  “Oh yes, the self professed queen of all things PR and advertising, Sammy Castle, at my service, I presume,” Jason moved to bow, but stopped. “If I didn’t have a sleeping child on my shoulder that would’ve been smooth.”

  “Keep dreaming, Wright!” she said, patting her daughter on the head and moving on. Deciding it was best to not comment on the fact that she wasn’t Sammy Castle anymore, she wondered when she’d start to feel like Samantha McKenzie again.

  **

  Jason’s phone lit up as he was leaving Sammy’s for the evening. He groaned at the name on the screen. He’d successfully avoided letting her know about his reconnection with Sammy for the last month, but something told him their conversation would be different tonight. With a heavy sigh, he answered the phone from his hands-free system.

  “Hello?”

  “You’ll never guess who I just got off the phone with?” his mother’s fake, syrupy sweet voice rang in his ear.

  “Who?” he sighed, trying to sound interested in a question he already knew the answer to.

  “”Missy Crandell-Davis,” her voice had a slight edge to it after his flippant response.

  “Davis?” Jason asked, confused, “As in Chester Davis? The upstanding proprietor of Chesty Nights?” He tried suppressing the laugh bubbling in his chest.

  “Yeah, that’s him,” she affirmed.

  “I didn’t realize they were married,” he said, bored, hoping she’d finally get to the reason for her call.

  “Oh yeah, about six months ago, but the poor girl has the worst luck!” his mom explained. “They are in the process of getting a divorce now. I guess it just didn’t work out,” she sighed in regret.

  “I’m sorry to hear that,” his voice dripped with sarcasm.

  “She couldn’t help it if his best friend got too handsy as Chester walked in the door. She said they weren’t doing anything and I believe her!” his mother defended.

  “Glad to see some things never change.” This time, the laugh couldn’t be held back, but it came out more bitter than jovial.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” his mom’s voice went up an octave as he signaled to merge onto the freeway.

  “Nothing, mom.”

  “She’s such a nice girl, so misunderstood,” she tutted. Jason had to bite the inside of his cheek to suppress a snort at her words. “Anyway, she said she saw you earlier.”

  “She did,” he confirmed, knowing what was coming next.

  “She said you were there with Samantha Castle,” her voice was now deceptively calm.

  “I was there with Sammy and Corigan,” he, again, verified.

  “Who’s Corigan- you know what, I don’t want to know,” his mother growled. “She said your precious Samantha was horrible to her. Yelled at her right there in the grocery aisle for no good reason! I’ve always told you that girl and her family were nothing but trouble!”

  “Actually, I was the one that yelled at Missy, mother,” Jason refuted, watching the road as the tires chewed up the distance between where he wanted to be and his house.

  “You don’t have to cover for that bitch
, Jason. I don’t even understand why you are even spending time with her again.”

  “I’m not covering, mom. Defending Missy cost me everything. I won’t do it again,” he growled as his memories threatened to assault him.

  “I could never comprehend why you and Missy never dated. She’s a wonderful girl. I hope you’ll consider giving her a chance,” she whined.

  “Not if she were the last woman on Earth,” Jason couldn’t hold back the disgust in his voice at his mother’s suggestion.

  Taking a deep breath, he tried to explain something he knew his mother would never understand, “Sammy just lost her husband; I’m helping out around her house and with her daughter while she heals. I’m not willing to discuss it. Is there anything else you’d like to talk about?” he asked, trying to shut her down.

  “Fine,” she huffed, before finally shifting focus. Her voice was less accusatory and more sullen as she changed the subject, luckily Jason was a few feet away from the parking lot to his condo complex. “Well, I’ve decided that enough is enough with the issues I’ve had with my femur lately and my life coach suggested I find an aromerologist to help me.”

  “Sounds fascinating, and I can’t wait to hear about it, but I just got home. I’m going to have to let you go,” he smiled to himself at the ridiculous ideas his mother comes up with and the money she throws away employing people to help her. Deep down inside, he knew it was because she had nothing else to do, because all of her kids were grown and she’d always been a stay at home mom. The whole thing might’ve triggered him to feel more sad than amused for the situation, if her second favorite hobby wasn’t meddling in the lives of her adult children. So he was more than happy to placate her manufactured health issues, if it meant she stayed away from trying to ‘fix’ him and his sisters.

  “Okay, honey, but think about what I said about Missy. She really is a wonderful girl!” she said, ending their conversation. She just couldn’t resist making one more plea for a woman he’d be happy to never see again.

 

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