by Bella Andre
Susan, Bob, and the Mavericks had continually told her they thought it best to give him room, to let things settle. But as far as Paige was concerned, all that had accomplished was enabling Evan to go deeper into hiding with every passing week. If not for tomorrow’s wedding, he’d probably still be thousands of miles away.
Well, Paige was happy to play the bad guy if it meant getting Evan to wake up and realize how much everyone cared for him—and how badly they all wanted to help him rebuild his life without Whitney. Hopefully, their friendship could survive some hard truths. Because Paige couldn’t imagine her life without Evan in it.
Deciding there was no time like the present, even if they were currently standing in front of the vast array of food set out at the buffet, she said, “Everyone has been frantic about you.” She made sure to modulate her voice so that only Evan could hear what she was saying. “You ran out on them all—Susan, Bob, the other Mavericks.” And me. “It didn’t help that your text left way more questions than it answered. Daniel told me all about it when he called to see if I might know anything that could allay Susan’s worries.”
“The bean casserole is good.” Evan added a lump of it to her plate before saying, “I needed some time. They all understand that.”
“Of course they understand. But you still deserted them. The wedding was coming up. The holidays. It was supposed to be a happy time, but they were all too worried about you to really enjoy it.”
Emotion moved through his eyes even as his mouth settled into an increasingly stubborn line. He took her plate and plunked it down next to his at the end of the dining table, far away from everyone else in the house. But though his family tried to pretend nothing was happening in Susan’s prettily decorated dining room, Paige still felt as if they were on display.
“I know how bad it was for you,” she continued in a low voice. “But you still blew it. You’ve been there for them when they needed help. You should have let them be there for you.” She’d gotten herself so wound up, she couldn’t hold back anymore. “And you should have let me be there for you too.” She swallowed hard before adding, “I’m sure that my being Whitney’s sister made it hard for you to talk to me, but I thought we were friends.”
“We are friends,” he said in a low voice. But he followed up with, “What exactly did she tell you?” The tenor of the question told her he suspected the worst.
“She admitted that she faked the pregnancies and miscarriages…and took steps to make sure she wouldn’t get pregnant by accident either.” The horrible way Whitney had abused Evan’s love and devotion sickened Paige. She shook her head, unable to adequately express the monstrosity of those lies and the utter ruthlessness of her sister’s actions. “I don’t know how she could have done that—and I can’t even begin to imagine what learning the truth must have been like for you.”
The shock of discovering Whitney’s horrible lies must have been devastating. Beyond devastating. Paige had been so sure Evan would need his family, his friends. She’d waited for his call. A text. An email. Some word from him.
Instead, there’d been total silence.
Even now, his face was a steely mask as he worked to hide every last ounce of emotion. But that was no good. Not with her. Not when she knew him well enough to see the grief—and fury—that flickered in his hazel eyes, darker now with the emotions he couldn’t fully conceal.
“She claimed it was all because of me,” he said in a grim voice. “That I pushed her to have kids when she didn’t want to. That she had no other choice.”
“She’s always been good at putting the best possible spin on things for herself,” Paige said. “Gathering her supporters around her, revealing exactly what she wants them to hear, eliciting the necessary sympathy.”
He held her gaze for a penetrating moment. “Did it work?”
She stared at him in shock, an actual physical pain tightening around her heart. “How can you even ask me that?”
Whitney was two years younger, the baby of the family, and though Paige hadn’t wanted to admit it, she’d long known that her sister had a dark side. How could she pretend it didn’t exist when she’d been the recipient of that darkness herself so many times?
But this was beyond anything she could have imagined Whitney was capable of.
As a psychologist, every single day Paige helped people manage their emotions—which often included dealing with difficult family members. Somehow, though, none of her schooling or experience helped her when it came to her own sister. Whitney always managed to make her feel like she wasn’t good enough.
According to her sister, the men Paige dated were losers. She didn’t wear the right clothes. Didn’t live in the right neighborhood or have the right kind of friends. And every time Paige looked into the harsh mirror her sister held up, she would question her decisions, asking herself if Whitney might be right.
Evan’s question pricked that nerve all over again, making her angry enough to snap, “You should trust me more than that. Yes, there are as many sides to every story as there are people involved. But there’s no way I could be on her side in this. It doesn’t matter that I’m her sister. I abhor what she did.”
Paige’s breath was shaky as she dragged it in. Despite her irritation—and how painfully aloof Evan seemed right now—her whole body ached with the need to throw her arms around him, to absorb his pain, to make it all better. Whitney had ripped his heart out and shredded it into pieces. Even if he wasn’t admitting it.
During the past year or so, Paige had felt him withdrawing more and more from everyone, and she hadn’t known what to do for him. It was so much easier to analyze from the outside than it was to examine your own emotions. And the truth was that hers were too involved to offer the solace he needed.
Which was why she should get up from the dining table, and away from Evan, before she said anything she’d regret. It was okay to make sure he understood how much he’d hurt his family with his desertion.
But if he ever found out why it had hurt her so much…
She didn’t have to be a psychologist to know that little piece of forbidden truth wouldn’t help any of them.
“All right, I’ve gotten things off my chest.” She stood. “Now I’m going to enjoy some girl talk with Harper and the rest of the gang.”
She marched from the dining room and back into the herd of Mavericks. But she left a piece of herself behind with Evan.
Just the way she always did, whether she wanted to or not.
* * *
Paige was right. Evan hadn’t simply gone dark—he’d deserted everyone. Especially Susan, the foster mother who’d taken him in when his own mother had abandoned him.
In the living room, Will laughed at something Jeremy said. Sebastian high-fived Jeremy, and Matt ruffled his hair, while Daniel pulled out his phone to take a picture of the group.
Evan had come home, determined to enjoy himself. Yet he was still standing on the other side of a chasm from everyone who mattered to him. All because he was too full of pride—and too ashamed—to admit that he’d been completely duped. His career was based on seeing deep inside a situation, making accurate judgments, having good instincts, assessing things correctly. But he hadn’t been able to see inside his own marriage.
Finding Susan alone in the kitchen, he slipped his arm around her waist. “I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize, honey. It’s okay.”
He remembered an old movie line, something about love meaning you never had to say you were sorry. He’d always thought that was total crap. Love meant you absolutely had to say you were sorry when you’d been an ass.
“It’s definitely not okay, Mom. I was wrong about a lot of things. Paige woke me up to some hard truths just now.”
Susan glanced at Paige, whom they could see through the open kitchen door. She wasn’t looking at them as she chatted with Harper, but Evan had a feeling Paige knew exactly what was being said in the kitchen right now. She was always able
to see through to the heart of people. Unlike him.
Susan’s face softened, a hint of a smile creasing her lips. “I’m glad she woke you up. But I do understand, even if I was worried. I remember when you were a boy how hard it was for you to talk about your feelings. Your way has always been to keep things inside.”
When he’d first come to live with the Spencers at age eleven, after his mother abandoned him and his father gave him away, he hadn’t allowed himself to be part of the family. If he’d felt like Susan was bossing him around, he’d given her the silent treatment. Of course, “bossing him around” had consisted of things like making him take a bath so he didn’t stink, or asking him to remove his muddy boots before he tracked dirt inside. And if he hadn’t been shutting her out, he’d done stupid passive-aggressive stuff, like when she’d asked him to take out the trash, he’d leave the bag just outside the door so that the rotting smell would seep inside. He’d done specifically what she’d asked and no more.
He’d been so afraid to let himself believe he actually belonged with them, no matter how good Susan and Bob were to him. Until their love taught him how to finally trust.
The trust that Whitney had done her damn level best to destroy all over again.
“I still should have called you, should have told you what happened instead of leaving it up to Paige to give you all the whole story. And I should have realized there was something wrong with my marriage long before I did.” He’d been nothing more than a pawn in Whitney’s games. He’d spent the past month trying to figure out how he could have been so gullible…but he still hadn’t found any answers.
Susan shook her head sadly. “I can’t believe she made up the pregnancies, the miscarriages. The pain she caused you. But to have an operation without even telling you?” Her jaw flexed as she gritted her teeth. Susan was always the calm one, totally unruffled by just about anything life had ever thrown at her—and life had thrown a lot. Clenched teeth weren’t her style, but Whitney’s actions had pushed even Susan’s limits. “I made so many excuses for her. So you can’t beat yourself up for not seeing the truth, honey. Because I certainly didn’t see it. She was so convincing.” She sighed, her brow furrowed. “I just hope she won’t keep hurting you now that you’re no longer together.”
“While I was gone, I had my lawyer draw up the divorce papers. I’m letting her have the flat in San Francisco and the apartment in New York.” She’d picked out both, and the spaces had frankly always left him more than a little cold. “But the business stuff is all separate, so she can’t touch it.” Thank God.
“I’m glad you protected your business ventures. I never thought I’d have to say that. But then, I didn’t realize she was so devious.” Susan actually shivered, before curling her arm through his. “I want you to remember that we’re here for you while you go through this. You don’t have to do it alone. We all love you.”
He pulled Susan in close, hugging her off her feet. “I won’t shut you out again, I promise. And I’m done giving Whitney even one more grain of our lives.”
But instead of nodding, Susan frowned. “Some things are easier said than done. Especially after we’ve spent so much of our lives with someone, good or bad.” She glanced toward the living room. “Paige was wonderful while you were gone. She knew all the right things to say. I’m sure she wants to help you through this difficult time too.”
His chest squeezed at Susan’s words, even as he reminded her, “She’s Whitney’s sister.”
Susan clucked her tongue at him. “Which means that she knows her best. When you add in the fact that she’s a psychologist, I’m confident she can help you navigate the obstacles in getting over Whitney.”
Susan was only trying to help, but Whitney’s sister was the last woman in the world he should ask for help. Not when he couldn’t stop noticing how the deep red of Paige’s sweater made her auburn hair shine and that the gentle curve of her hips in jeans was mouthwatering.
And definitely not when every second that she’d been reading him the Riot Act in the dining room, his urge to kiss her had grown to near irresistible proportions.
Chapter Four
Paige grabbed her coat and stepped outside to enjoy the snow. She was a California girl, so the only snow she ever saw was up in Lake Tahoe. Unfortunately, she didn’t get up to the mountains often enough.
Standing on the deck beneath the overhang, she gazed out over the backyard, the porch lamps bathing the snow with a soft blue light. The snow-covered lawn was pristine, with only the tiny footprints of a squirrel running from one side to the other. Flakes fell gently, floating in the air like wisps of magic.
The beauty of the scene reached deep inside her, easing the tension of the past weeks. She loved the career she’d chosen—helping families come together again, teaching people to see the good in their lives instead of only the bad, watching the growth of their spirits. But none of that happened overnight, and the process could sometimes be draining. When Paige added in her own personal issues—including not only the devastation Whitney’s lies had caused, but also Paige’s unrequited feelings for Evan—she had ended up feeling more than a little plowed under herself.
Thankfully, the serenity of the snowy night restored her. It also helped that Evan had spent the past couple of hours making his rounds inside, giving apologies and explanations about all that had happened. He was doing the right thing. Surely he would have gotten around to it even without her putting his feet to the fire, but she was glad he’d done it tonight so that nothing left a blemish on the wedding tomorrow.
Behind her, the sliding glass door opened, but she didn’t turn at the sound of footsteps. She already knew it was Evan. He had a subtle scent all his own, something that always made her heart beat faster. As he stopped beside her at the railing, all it took was his nearness to heat her up.
For a long moment, they stared out at the yard that was as pretty as a calendar picture. She’d been angry before, but now she was simply glad to stand in the silence with him.
Finally, he said, “Thank you for your advice.”
“It wasn’t advice. It was righteous indignation.”
He laughed softly. She hadn’t realized how good his laugh could sound when it had been absent for so long. Or that it would fill her up in the places where she’d felt so empty this past month.
He put his hand on hers for a brief moment. “I’m sorry, Paige. It wasn’t fair of me to put you in the position of having to explain to everyone what happened. And I shouldn’t have left you to handle Whitney alone either.”
Over the last month—at least until her sister had left for the south of France just before Christmas—Whitney had called several times, always trying to convince Paige that she was in the right—and Evan was at fault. For her part, Paige took her sister’s calls out of hope that she could get Whitney to see the terrible betrayal in what she’d done, to convince her that she had to change, that she needed to atone. But that hadn’t happened…and, if Paige was totally honest with herself, it likely never would.
Instead of going through the play-by-play of the last weeks, however, Paige simply told Evan, “Her calls came less often when she realized I wasn’t sympathetic.”
“She tried to punish you for my kicking her out, for wanting a divorce, didn’t she?”
After a moment, Paige admitted, “She said my mother wouldn’t have been surprised that I’d failed her yet again.”
“Your mother wouldn’t have approved of what Whitney did.”
“She certainly wouldn’t have,” Paige agreed. But her mother would have made excuses for her sister anyway.
Because Whitney was the baby of the family, her parents had indulged her. Buying her toys when she cried, rationalizing when she behaved poorly, giving her money instead of insisting she earn it herself.
Their mother had passed from cancer three years after Whitney married Evan. As she lay dying, she’d made Paige promise to take care of her father and sister. “You’re all they hav
e now,” her mother had said.
Paige had only just started her family therapy practice, and while she was still in the weeds of her new business, somehow her father had floundered before she even realized it. He hadn’t taken care of himself, and when the flu turned into pneumonia, he wasn’t strong enough to fight.
After horribly failing her vow to look after him, Paige had sworn she would do whatever it took to support Whitney. She’d stuck with her sister no matter what, listened to Whitney’s complaints, given advice she knew her sister wouldn’t take, even made excuses for Whitney when she was cruel, selfish, or hurtful.
But once her sister betrayed her husband in such a monumental fashion, Paige had to finally draw the line.
“Apart from being angry with me,” he said softly, “how are you doing?”
Paige was always the one who asked that question. She wasn’t used to being on the receiving end. “I’m fine.”
He raised an eyebrow. “I know a thing or two about those words.” He held her gaze. “I also know they’re not always the whole truth, even if we wish they were.”
She turned slightly, brushing his arm with hers. “You’re home, and your family is ecstatic to have you back. There’s going to be a beautiful wedding tomorrow.” Yes, she was burying her head in the sand, but she didn’t want to talk about Whitney anymore. She turned back to the snow. “And we’ve got this gorgeous sight laid out before us. Like a Norman Rockwell painting.”
When Evan’s mouth curved slightly as he took in the scene, her heart lifted. He would be fine. There’d be days or even weeks when it would all drag him down again, but in the long run, he’d be better off without her sister. Paige would make sure he was.
“Look, the snow is coming faster,” she said, leaning over the railing to catch the big, fat flakes. They melted quickly against her skin, and she wiped her wet hand on her coat, the cold suddenly shivering through her.