by Marcy Blesy
Grandpa pushes open the front door and joins me on the rickety wooden swing that withstands year after year of Michigan winter with only chipping paint to show as battle scars. “You going to stay long?” he asks.
“Maybe a few days—unless I’m putting you out,” I say.
“No. Stay as long as you like. The house has been kind of quiet as of late.”
“Oh, it can’t be that quiet with a teenage boy living in the house,” I say, laughing uncomfortably.
“Blake?” Grandpa shakes his head. “Nah, he’s never home. Got himself a new girlfriend, and between that and conditioning for basketball, it’s rare he’s home before 10:00, 10:30 every night. Can’t recall the last meal he ever sat down to eat.”
“Hmm,” I say, contemplating this news. Blake has definitely cut back on his texts to me in the last month or so, but I had no idea that he had a girlfriend. Maybe that’s the change he was referring to in one of his last texts. Anyway, it’s new information I need to explore. He’d better be home for dinner tonight. He did promise he’d make time for his big sister.
“You have a good summer?” Grandpa asks, shuffling his feet back and forth to make the swing move faster.
“It’s been…interesting,” I say, carefully choosing my words.
“Get all that information you were looking for?” He stops swinging and looks at me. A nice smile would have helped to prep the conversation we are going to have, but none crosses his face.
“I know I wasn’t abandoned at the lodge by my mom,” I say quietly. He bites his bottom lip but doesn’t speak. “And I know that your son did something that intentionally—or not—caused her to die. And then he abandoned me after taking a bunch of money which I assume he shared with you to relieve the burden that Blake and I presented.” I raise my voice the longer I speak and don’t hear that the screen door has opened again. Grandma is staring at me, holding herself upright with a different cane than the one she used to walk down the hall.
“Don’t raise your voice in this house, young lady,” she says, her eyes wrinkling with anger. “We didn’t take a cent from Johnny. We raised you kids because you’re family and that’s what families do. Johnny went out by Detroit and got himself a job. He did what was best for you kids by giving you to us to raise. He was in no shape to raise two kids when his charlatan wife ran out on him and got herself pregnant with somebody else’s baby.” She looks me squarely in the eyes, her own the steely gray color that matches the coldness of her heart.
“That’s not true,” I say. “Mom didn’t date dad then. She didn’t cheat on him like he did with her….”
Grandpa puts his hand on my knee and squeezes as hard as he can. I stop talking. “Enough,” he says.
“Why do you hate me so much?” I ask. “None of this is my fault.”
“We don’t hate you, Reese,” says Grandpa.
“You’re stubborn like your mother,” says my grandmother, spitting the words in anger. “Always have been.”
“I wouldn’t know,” I spit back. “Nobody talked about her much. I think I learned more about my mother in the last three months than I did my whole life.”
“That’s because you met your real father, I imagine,” she says.
“You knew?” I ask.
“I knew when Johnny came back after your last trip to the lodge to tell us,” she says, coughing.
I wait until her coughing spell has passed before speaking again because I want them both to hear the question I have to ask. “What did he say to you about why he decided to dump his children like a ton of bricks?”
Grandpa takes a slow breath and lets it out in a deep sigh, more like a groan. “He said there was an accident, Reese, something he didn’t do intentionally, but something that might look otherwise in the eyes of the court, and that he took some money as part of a promise to…to leave. It wasn’t fair to you to lose your mother and then see your dad possibly sent to jail—or worse—for the rest of his life.”
“And it was better to tell us nothing and lead us to believe that we were abandoned because no one wanted us?” I am yelling again, but this time Grandpa doesn’t try to stop me.
“We wanted you,” he says quietly.
“She didn’t,” I say, pointing toward my grandmother who uses the wall to support her frail weight. She doesn’t speak.
“If I’d known how ungrateful you’d become, I’d have said no,” she says, turning back toward the house and letting the door slam behind her.
“Why?” I ask Grandpa, tears filling my eyes.
He puts his hand on my knee and squeezes again. “Because when we agreed to raise the two of you, your grandmother lost her beloved Johnny. He was too afraid to come around anymore for fear that the tragedy at Tremont Lodge would catch up to him even after all these years, and he’d be sent to jail. And Johnny, well, he has always been her one true love.”
“But Blake and I didn’t sign up for any of this. It’s a shame she hasn’t learned to let go of grudges. She’s just going to die a bitter, old lady.”
The slap across my face is beyond startling as every nerve in my body fires shock and pain. “Don’t talk about your grandmother that way. You owe her your life. Without her, you’d have been put in the foster system. Would that have been better, Reese?”
I grab my cheek, imagining the red imprint of his hand still upon my face. “Maybe it would have been,” I whisper, getting up from the swing and walking down the long driveway to the country road that leads to forever and nowhere all at the same time.
If Blake hadn’t been in town, I would have gotten into my car and driven back to the lodge, but I couldn’t come home without talking to him. Home. What an odd word, since I feel more like a nomad wandering the earth with nowhere to permanently land, as if no one wants to claim me for his own. I sip my iced tea as I wait for Blake to arrive at the local greasy spoon restaurant, and I think about Finn and our stupid fight. I wonder if he is thinking about me, too.
“Earth to Reese,” says Blake, sliding into the booth across from me.
“Hey! It’s about time you got here,” I say, reaching over the table to hug my little brother who isn’t so little anymore.
“Other than the frown on your face, you look great,” he says, a large smile filling his face, his light gray eyes blazing with merriment and mischief. I suppose we both got our hair color from our mother. The realization that we are only half-brother and sister hits me hard, and I feel a new wave of emotion rolling through my heart. “Hey, I was only kidding,” says Blake, squeezing my hand. “I’m really glad you’re here.”
I blink back my tears and spend the next hour listening to Blake tell me about his new girlfriend Hannah—redhead, cute as a button, sweet as pie, smartest girl in school, and rockin’ body—and how he took a new job working at the state park cleaning litter off the beach now that the vacation crowd has gone back to Chicago.
“So you’re not working on the fruit farm anymore?” I ask.
“Some, but they have a fleet of seasonal workers. And, truthfully, I don’t have much time with all my school work and basketball and the park job—and Hannah.” He smiles again at just the mention of her name. “Plus, with Grandma being sick she prefers I stay in the house with her when I’m home rather than run off in those fields as she likes to say.”
“Sick?” I ask, confused.
“Yeah, the cancer treatments are a bitch.”
I suck in my breath and blow it out slowly, feeling light-headed as I do so. “She has cancer?” I ask, surprised.
“Didn’t they tell you? I mean, I didn’t want to tell you in a text message or anything like that, but I figured they’d have told you today. That’s kind of why I stayed away as long as I could—to give you guys a good time to talk.”
“Yeah, that didn’t quite happen,” I say under my breath, but Blake hears me.
“What happened?” he asks. A trail of nacho cheese hangs between his fingers and the plate of chips in front of him.
&
nbsp; “I…we…” Why tell him now? If he’s not curious, what benefit could it possibly add to Blake’s life if he knew the truth about our parents? “It was just awkward. I’ve been gone for a while, you know?”
“Tell me about it,” he says, chomping on another chip. “The house is way too quiet without you here, but at least I have Hannah now.”
I smile this time. I know the feeling of being in love, and it makes me miss Finn even more. “Are you happy, Blake?”
He pauses as if to consider the question. “I am, Reese. I’m really happy, except, you know, for Grandma being sick and all.”
I nod my head like I understand, and maybe I do a little bit. If I’d lost a child like Grandma feels she lost her son, and she knows she’ll probably die without ever seeing him again, then I guess I’d be a little bitter, too. “It was really good talking to you in person,” I say. “You should come up to the lodge this fall,” I say.
“Oh man, that would be great, but I don’t know if Hannah’s parents will let me bring her. They’re kind of traditional.”
“You could come alone, you know?” I ask, though I already anticipate his answer.
“I could, but…”
“I know, Blake. It’s okay. Being in love is kind of cool.”
Chapter 14:
The fruit trees and vineyards fade in my rearview mirror as I drive away from my grandparents’ farm and back to the interstate that will bring me back to Tremont Lodge and Finn and maybe the dad that abandoned me a long time ago, but I’m not afraid anymore. I know I don’t belong in Bridgman. Maybe I belong at Tremont Lodge. Maybe I don’t, but that figuring out will all come in time.
I call Finn through the Bluetooth of my car to let him know I am coming back to the lodge and to let him know how much I’ve missed him…and that I’m sorry. Bree and Tinley have been amazing additions to my life this summer, but Finn has been the one constant who never wavered in his support of me. Maybe I had to go through all the crap in my life so it would bring me to this very place where I’d meet the man of my dreams. And maybe that fact makes it all worth it after all. His past with Samantha is just that—the past. At least that’s what I try to tell myself right now. But Finn doesn’t answer, so I leave a message instead.
“Hi. Letting you know I’ll be home by dinner, and I’d love to see you. I miss you.”
The employee parking lot is sparse compared to last weekend when there wasn’t a spot to be found for the last hurrah of the summer. Now reality has set back in for everyone, and life continues away from vacation land. Only, when you’re living at a resort, maybe a little bit of that escape can sink into your day-to-day—if you let it. But first I need to talk to Ted.
The elevator takes me to the third floor of the lodge. “Hi, Georgia,” I say to Ted’s faithful secretary and, I presume, intimate confidante. “I’d love to see Ted if he’s available.”
“Reese, I’m sorry, but Ted’s not here.”
“Oh, okay, when might you expect him back?”
“I’m not sure. The doctors have him on another new medication, and it’s really wiping him out.” She dabs at her eyes with a tissue she’s clutching in her dainty hands, one of which is wearing a large, sparkly diamond. Interesting.
“That’s terrible,” I say. “Has he been working at all this week?” I bite the inside of my cheek and hope that Georgia can’t read my mind, but it doesn’t work.
She stiffens up and throws back her shoulders, pushing out her perfectly sized bosom and flashing her bright blue eyes. “If you mean, who has been running the daily operation of the lodge since you ran off, it hasn’t been him, no. Lawson has stepped up to take over where you left off.”
“Lawson?” I ask.
“Yes, he’s quite capable. After all, things were operating just fine here at Tremont Lodge before you came along.”
The accusation hangs in the air before dropping its full weight. “Thanks for the information, Georgia,” I say, biting my cheek again and moving on before I say something I will regret.
I’m exiting the elevator to the main level of the lodge as Lawson is preparing to enter. “Reese?” he says, surprised. “You’re back!”
“Yeah, I’m back. I bet you’re completely thrilled, too, aren’t you? It’s not all clear right now, but your hand is in this somehow.”
“What are you talking about?” he asks, entering the elevator and pushing the button for the third floor offices, the door closing behind us.
“You…you wanted me to leave the lodge! You hugged me so that Finn would see and think the wrong thing! You stirred the pot so I’d get so pissed I’d leave—not to mention contacting my dad so he’d cause more trouble. You’re the reason for all my problems. You have been all summer long!”
Lawson shrinks back into the corner of the elevator, but he’s no coward. He stands at his full height, flexing his arms as I move closer. “I didn’t force you into my arms, Reese. And it wasn’t done with a malicious intent. Despite my world turning upside down since you got here, I care about you.”
I take a deep breath and steady my heart with a hand over my chest. Breathe in. Breathe out. The door to the third floor offices opens again. “I’d like a brief of what’s been going on at the lodge the last few days. I’ll be back here in an hour to get it.” Lawson steps out of the elevator without another word. I continue upstairs, more determined than ever now to meet with Ted despite my trepidation after first speaking with Georgia. I don’t know what I was so afraid of. What do I have to lose, after all?
The elevator opens directly into Ted’s penthouse suite that encompasses the entire main floor of Tremont Lodge. I haven’t been here since the visit with Lawson to get clues about my last vacation to the lodge when I was five, but I remember the hidden key slot that I hope my master key will grant me access to get into the suite. I can’t help but feel like I am trespassing again, even with Ted being present this time. A collection of pill bottles litters the kitchen counter with dirty dishes piled next to the sink. An assortment of blankets lies in a crumpled heap on the couch that sits directly in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows and overlooks the lawn. It seems odd that so many blankets would be out when the day’s low temperature hasn’t dipped below sixty degrees at night and eighty degrees during the day.
“Who’s there?” a frail voice asks from a room down the hall.
I take another deep breath. “Mr. Oakley, it’s me. Reese.”
“Reese?” I hear him repeat.
“Yes.”
After a couple of minutes, Mr. Oakley shuffles down the hall until he is standing in front of me. He is wearing a navy blue robe with matching slippers. His eyes droop like he hasn’t been sleeping in days. “I wasn’t sure you’d come back,” he says.
“I just needed a breather,” I say.
“I trust that you feel better now,” he says.
“Honestly, not really. Why don’t you sit down?” He motions to the couch that is covered in blankets.
“Sorry about that. It’s kind of cold up here.”
I nod like I understand, but I don’t. “I should go. You look like you’ve been resting. I’m sorry to have bothered you.”
“You are not bothering me, Reese. Truthfully, I feel a lot better now knowing that you haven’t abandoned me—I mean, the lodge—entirely.” He smiles weakly, and I smile, too. “What did you have to say?” He sits in a chair across from me. The late afternoon light from the windows shines on him, making him look like a heavenly figure which seems at odds with my thoughts on the man who also abandoned me in so many ways.
“My grandparents said they didn’t take any money from my dad—my…the man I thought was my dad.” There’s no right way to ease into this conversation, so I say what’s on my mind.
“I see. So, you think I lied about your dad?”
“No. I’m not sure…did you?”
“I wrote John Prentice a check for $100,000 to leave the lodge, to make arrangements for his children that didn’t involve him
, and to never speak of the incident with your mother or Lawson’s mother ever again…or to come back to Tremont Lodge.”
The tears spring to my eyes, and I feel so sad. Both of my fathers chose a life of money over any love for a little girl—a little girl who grew up despite them both, a little girl who deserved love more than anything. “Thank you for the information.” I start to get up, but Mr. Oakley puts his hand on my arm and beckons me back to the couch with his pleading eyes.
“Reese, please sit down. There’s more.”
“What do you mean?”
This time it’s Ted taking the deep breath. “I’ve been watching your father off and on for the last sixteen years.”
“What? Why?” I blink back the tears in confusion.
“I couldn’t risk him coming back and spilling the horrible secrets of that night so long ago, so I needed to make sure he was staying away from you and your brother…that he hadn’t weakened in his resolve to go to the grave with the secrets of the past.”
“Go on,” I say.
“He’s been present in your life more than you know.”
The hair on my arm stands up. “What do you mean?”
“My private investigators found him at your high school a few times watching a game or in the audience at your graduation—things like that. He never got close enough to talk to you, but he was there.”
“Did my grandparents know?”
“I don’t think so.”
I think about the messages I have received this summer.
I think you look beautiful.
Looking forward to seeing you again today.
Even the picture he delivered in a wrapped box, the orange balloons a nod to my favorite color, my favorite Hello Kitty clock, the newspaper clippings. Even the last name he chose to use during registration—I suppose it could all point to a man with regrets over his choices to cut me out of his life. I suppose there is nothing sinister involved, but… “Do you know that he is here now?” I ask, my hand shaking almost as much as Ted’s.