Breathe, I tell myself as I feel my hands ball into fists. I look at Brielle and—not for the first time—I notice the girl of my past is now a woman. The curves of her breasts and the thickness of her ass makes my dick jump with excitement.
The fuck am I doing?
Brielle is an adult. If she wants to go home with this asshole, then by all means . . . I have no right to stop her. But when I catch his hand brush a spot along her knee, pausing for a second too long. My reservations elude me.
"Are you fucking dense?" I practically rip Brielle off her stool and pull her to me. Really I just need to get her out of the way so I can kick this guy’s ass.
"Theo!" Brielle tries to worm her way free from my grip. "What’s your problem? We were just eating."
"Yeah, well, I guess that's better than the alternative."
"The alternative?"
"You." I turn my attention to Blake. I point my finger at him, feeling Brielle’s tiny hands pull at my wrist, as if she could hold me back if I wanted to hit him. "What the fuck are you doing?"
I watch him struggle for an answer until he raises his sandwich. "Eating."
Jesus. This guy must have a death wish. I half laugh at his answer and fight the urge not to punch the panini out of his hand. I know I’m blowing this out of proportion, but it’s like I can’t stop. I’m too far gone; I’m seeing red. "Get the fuck out of my club."
I grab my keys off the bar and begin making my way towards the back door. I hear tiny footsteps trailing after me, but I’m not in the mood to stop.
"Theo, wait."
With that, my feet halt. Damn it. Even my feet are against me. I turn around, finding no other option, and frown when I notice her shaking.
"What the hell was that?"
"What else should I have done? Fucking let him finish his sandwich?” I roll my eyes. I’d much sooner shove it down his throat. I cut my eyes to the ground, to the boxes lining the wall. I exhale a breath and kick the closest one. “Do you like him or something?" I feel myself spiraling now. The small smile she offered him and the way she allowed his touch replaying in my mind, like a sick joke.
“Stop.” Her tone is soft, but I can hear the anger she’s suppressing. When I look up, I see something flash behind her eyes, like an old memory resurfacing.
“Stop what?”
"Stop talking to me like this."
Her voice is low. I watch her take in a deep breath and release it.
"This isn’t like you. What happened to the old Theo who was kind and sweet, and—"
"I don't know what to tell you. Maybe you just didn’t know me as well as you thought you did."
“I don’t believe that."
I roll my eyes. "That’s the thing, Brielle. I don’t care what you think. Or what anyone thinks for that matter. If you haven’t noticed, a lot has changed since you knew me."
Damn it. I shouldn’t have said that.
Brielle looks down the hall toward the bar, the same time the front entry door clicks shut signaling Blakes departure.
"Right. Silly me.” She twists to the side. “I'm . . . um . . . I’m gonna go."
I call her name, when she starts to walk away, but she ignores it. I quickly jog around her and block her path. I touch her shoulder, but she shoves it off.
"Don’t, Theo. I just want to go home." She tilts her head up to look at me. But I find little relief in the fact that she doesn't move to try and go around. "I can't do this right now. I can’t go there with you. Think what you want, but we were honestly just eating."
"Come on, Brielle," I say. My eyes trail the length of her, as if her body needed an explanation for how easily she affects men. "There's nothing innocent in the way you make guys feel."
Immediately, the soft tone vanishes in front of me. Her cheeks quickly turn red as she narrows her eyes in frustration. "Can you stop it already? Leave the act behind. I already have Luca trying to take Mason's place. I don't need you doing it too!"
Luca? Mason? What the hell just happened. Am I missing something? What did I say that would make her say that?
“Wait. Hold on a second. Brielle . . .” I reach my arm out to grab hold of her, while she tries to push around me. Neither of us are taking note of the lone box that I kicked earlier, which is now sitting in the middle of the floor, until she stumbles, and we fall face first to the ground.
Instinctively, my first thought is to catch her. But in the mess of things, it doesn’t work out that way. "Shit, are you all right?" I ask, my voice etched in panic. I had inevitably fallen for her—or on top of her—but I’m thankful to find my arms absorbed most of my weight.
I feel her hands pressing against my chest. She’s lying motionless, staring up at me with those damn green eyes. Her blonde waves have fallen, framing her face; the smell of her coconut shampoo quickly overloads my senses again.
“I, um. . .”
For a second, I let my mind drift as I shift my weight onto one arm. With my free hand, I brush a strand of her hair, which is resting over her lips, off to the side. The soft, pink fullness of them ignite a sense of need deep within me—an all-consuming desire to have my way with her. . .to push the limits of what she knows is possible.
I tell myself to get up, but I am no longer in control. Rather, I’m being driven by another part of me—a part that I’m not embarrassed to admit is beginning to inch its way down the leg of my pants.
"I'm sorry,” she says. Her words are breathy and weak. "I wasn't paying attention."
Right.
Without another thought, I roll over and stand up. My mind is a jumbled mess as I reach down and lift her to her feet. As usual, she is light, fitting perfectly in my arms.
"No, it's not your fault." I take a step back, suddenly in need of some distance between us. I push a hand through my hair and force myself to look at the ground. “Um . . I can give you a ride. If you want. That way you don’t have to bother Luca."
I can see her hesitation. She doesn’t trust me. But being who she is, she also doesn’t want to say no. “Sure. A ride would be great.”
chapter nine
Brielle
The next week goes by quickly, and to celebrate the start of the weekend, Luca and I grab lunch on the square after our history class. We would have invited Becks, but after two shifts together and countless hours spent “texting,” she and Wes have officially decided to declare themselves an item. Like any other new couple, they’re practically joined at the hip. And I couldn’t be more happy for her.
"Melle’s Mushroom?" Luca’s asks. His voice, muffled through the phone.
"Sounds good to me. Meet you in ten?"
"It’s a date!"
I arrive a few minutes early, so I hurry inside to grab us a table. Luckily, it’s still early enough that there aren't too many people around just yet. Even with it being a Friday, pizza and burgers before noon isn’t every college student’s ideal choice. But it is ours. When Luca arrives, the waitress comes over, and we place our order. Not too much later, our food arrives, and we both scarf down half a pizza and share a side of fries.
"I was thinking about heading up to the Drafthouse and catching a movie tonight," Luca says as the two of us waste the last few minutes walking around the square. "Want to come?"
"Sure!" I smile up at him. "I haven't been to a movie theater in forever."
"Really? Cool. Pick you up around six?"
“Works for me.”
Later that night, as we arrive at the gas station, Luca hops out to work the pump. The flashing neon lights flicker every so often behind his head, as he leans down to look at me through the driver’s side window.
"Want to go grab us some candy?"
"Is that even a question?" I accept his wallet from his outstretched hand. I smile and open my door. "Any requests?"
"You know what I like."
I turn around and walk inside, happy I decided to come. Luca's been in such a playful mood all day. I love when he's like this. Playful Luca is always
way more fun than brooding Luca. I spot the candy section and almost skip to it. The cashier up front waves to me as I turn the aisle. Eying the Snickers bars, I reach for one.
"Snickers, huh? By that little noise you made the other night, after the Reese’s shot, I wouldn’t have guessed that." The familiar voice whispers over my shoulder. I turn around and jump back, thankful when Wes is able to steady me before I take the whole display down. "Oh shit. My bad. Are you okay?"
I nod. "Yes, thank you." Dusting myself off as if I had actually fallen, I say, "I, um. We. . . we're headed to the movies." I smile, holding up Luca’s wallet. "Luca and I, I mean. Where’s Becks?"
"Oh, she caught a last-minute shift tonight." He takes a step back. "I’m here with the boys. Were all about to head over to K.O. and watch Theo’s big fight.” He reaches around my shoulder and grabs a Snickers for himself. “You should come if you want. Luca, too.”
“K.O.?”
“You know, Knock Out?” he says, but the name doesn’t register. “The bar just outside city limits . . . the one with the boxing ring . . . and the fights . . . and, seriously? You’ve never heard of it?”
I shake my head.
"Hey, man. You ready to—”
I look up to see Ethan turning into the aisle. His eyes make a broad sweep around us, until he settles his focus on me. “Ah, fuck. What the hell is new girl doing here? Are you, like, stalking us or something?"
I narrow my eyes at him.
"Shut the hell up, Ethan. Brielle’s cool." Wes turns around and slaps the Snickers bar to his chest. "Just for that, you can pay for being a dick." His tone flat. Then he turns back around to face me. "So, what do you think? Want to come?"
"Brielle, everything okay? The cars filled up. You ready yet?" I hear Luca walking up behind me. He’s probably been wondering what the hell was taking so long to buy a Snickers, a KitKat, and two bottles of water.
“Oh yeah. Sorry. I ran into Wes and we started talking.” I press my lips together. I can hear my mind screaming at me to walk away and go to the movies. But I’d be lying if I didn’t say the idea of going to Knock Out didn’t sound interesting. Well, not the idea of watching Theo fight, but if I go, maybe he’ll change his mind. “He just invited us to go to Knock Out with them. They’re going to watch—”
“You want to go to K.O.? No! Hell no!”
“Whoa, man.” I watch Wes’s eyebrows pull in. “There’s nothing wrong with K.O., Theo and I go there all the time.”
“Oh well, that makes me feel better, because Theo being there must mean it’s safe.”
I catch the anger spark behind Wes’s eyes, and before anything happens, I slide between them. Just in case.
“Luca didn’t mean that,” I hedge, trying to prevent a fight from happening before we even arrive at the place. “Right, Luca?”
“Wrong. I’ve been there . . . it’s not the best crowd.”
“Luca, please.”
“No, Brielle, please. I enjoy watching me dig their own graves.”
I turn to Wes and touch his shoulder. His sea-blue eyes fall to my hand, then move up my arm and settle along my face.
“Why don’t I just text you if we end up going?” I smile sweetly.
“Ya, I think that might be best.” His lips crease as he runs his tongue along the front of his teeth. “I’ll put your names down at the front.”
“Thank you!”
Luca and I walk back to the car after purchasing what I’d originally gone in for. He holds my door for me as I get in, and I can see he’s busy trying to piece together his defense. He shuts the door when I’m in and walks around to his side.
“Brielle, I know what you’re thinking. The whole fighting, bad boy stuff, as cliché as it is, is attractive to women. But, I just—”
“You think bad boys fighting is hot, Luca?” I tease him.
“Ha. Ha. I said to women, and I only know this because you and Becks made me watch that vampire TV series about ten-billion times last summer. I just don’t think it’s a good idea.”
I suck my bottom lip in between my teeth and bite it. I fully understand why he’s saying this. I mean, hell, I think it’s insane for something like this to even exist. But it does, and yet, I still want to go.
“Look, what if we only went just long enough so I can see the place—if only so I can say I’ve been there once. We don’t even have to sit with Theo if you don’t want to. Wes said he was fighting anyway.”
“Of course, he is.” Luca rolls his eyes. “Brielle, have you seen the guy? He’s built like an NFL linebacker and covered in tattoos. I know you probably think he’s still the old Theo, but that guy is long gone. And this new version is trouble.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re right.”
“I mean, what would your father say if he found out you went to a bar that has a secret boxing league? Because I already know what he’d do to me. He’d kill me and lock you up for temporary insanity.”
Crap. I hadn’t even thought about my father, or what he’d do to Luca if he found out he was the one who drove me there. I look up when I hear Wes’s voice snap at Ethan across the parking lot. His blond mess of hair is draped in front of his face, like it usually is, as he tosses Ethan a Gatorade across the tailgate. A minute later, they pull out and speed off while we’re still parked.
I close my eyes, fully aware that there’s a good chance I’m going to regret this, and say, “Luca, I want to go.”
“Seriously? After everything I just said, you still want to go?”
“Yes.”
Luca runs a hand over his hair, then pulls out of the parking lot. “Fine, but we’re not staying long.”
We drive the rest of the way in silence as I look out the window. Fifteen minutes ago we passed a building and I haven’t seen one since. At the next light, Luca takes a right turn. And another mile down, we come up to a big field where a hundred or so cars and trucks are parked, surrounding a lone building. The building itself is massive and is easily fifty-thousand square feet, or more. It looks like a venue one might rent out for an event more than a bar.
“This is it?” I ask, leaning under the rearview mirror as we turn in and round the front, looking for a place to park.
“Yup. This is the place.”
In bright, bold letters, the words: “KNOCK OUT,” are lit up in red over the entrance. Luca finds a place to park up close, when we see Wes and Ethan cross over the parking lot and meet up with Theo. I cut my eyes back to Luca and notice the worried look on his face.
“Everything is going to be okay, Luca.”
“Yeah, you say that now.”
I laugh then hop out of the car. I wait at the trunk for Luca, when a group of guys leaving are passing by. Seeing them, Luca grabs my arm and rips me back to him.
His sour expression is confusing at first, until he leans in to whisper in my ear, “See what I mean?”
At first, I’m not sure what he means. A group of guys leaving a bar, is a pretty normal sight. But when I take a closer look, I see the guys are covered in blood—lots of blood—up their arms, around their hairline, and across their face.
“What the hell?” I inhale in a quick breath. My fingers dig into Luca’s arm.
Oh yeah.
This place definitely isn’t legal.
“You sure you still want to go?” Luca almost seems excited for a moment.
I turn back to the bar and catch another group, shuffling out the door. Two of them pull out their cigarette packs, while the other two hang back and lean against the concrete wall. I barely get a glimpse inside enough to see the corner of the ring before the doors slam shut.
If Becks were here, she’d tell me to suck it up and move my ass—and that I need to stop being so scared of what my father thinks and just live in the moment. I rub my hands together and pull at the frayed end of my shorts.
“Yes, now come on.”
I link Luca’s arm with mine, and we start to walk up to the bar’s entrance. I barely make it a step be
fore I catch Theo’s eyes spot me from across the lot, and instantly I feel the weight of his stare, which is full of the slow, burning anger that I saw the other night at the club. I avert my eyes, feeling my cheeks heat up.
I hate that he had to see me like that. I found out from Becks, the next morning, that I’d passed out in his car and that that he had to carry me inside and put me to bed. Put me to bed! Like a child!
“Um, I’m sorry, but what the fuck is she doing here?” Theo yells out loud. The twenty or so guests walking around out front all stop and turn to stare.
Yup, I’m already regretting it.
chapter ten
BRIELLE
What the hell are you doing here?" Theo repeats, his eyes shifting from the bar to me, then back to the bar. He pushes past Wes, barreling through four guys, and meets me at the door. His expression contorts from shock to confusion, to full on anger, as he grabs my arm and drags me over to the side of the building.
"Do you realize where you are? You don’t belong here." His eyes dart between Luca and me. “What were you thinking, bringing her here? Take her home! Now!”
I shake my head and push past him. But the second I take a step, his hand reaches out and grasps my arm, twirling me around to face him. "Stop grabbing me!" I yell and pull my arm away.
"Then stop walking away from me and I will."
He exhales a breath and pauses. His eyes flit behind me and out into the parking lot. Being this close to him, I can smell the spice of Katrina’s vanilla perfume on his shirt, and I hate the fact that it’s there. “You’re not going inside.” He shakes his head. A smug smile spreads along his lips.
Ugh! "I'm not some high schooler anymore, Theo. I'm an adult. I don’t need you, or anyone, to protect me. I can go wherever the hell I please."
Cinching his hands around my hips, Theo pushes me against the cement wall of the building. I feel his fingers dig into my skin as he leans over me. His eyes rest on my mouth. I can tell by the look in them that he’s deliberating what to do next.
"Do you even know what goes on in there? The type of people that hang out at places like this?" he says in a low voice.
With You: With you, I am who I want to be. Page 7