“Who the hell are you to tell me anything about her? You fucked her once. Once!” Being the asshole that I am, I raised my eyebrows.
“More like twice, but who the hell’s countin’.” Lucky’s fists clenched at his sides. Oh hell, I was really pushing this son of a bitch.
I took a drag off my smoke and blew it out harshly before saying, “Look, brother. I sure as hell didn’t come here for a fight. In fact, I didn’t even come here to fuck, that was a surprise bonus. At any rate, that girl holds a lot inside her. I’m not a fuckin’ rocket scientist by any means but if I can see that shit, you sure as fuck can too.” His hands slowly come unclenched as he looks at me.
“It’s not the way I am.” I didn’t know what the fuck that was supposed to mean and frankly, I didn’t give a shit either.
“That’s on you, man. I got shit to handle while I’m here. You want to take that shit out on me? Go for it. I’m fuckin’ game.” Brushing past him, I head out of the room. I’m not into that kind of shit. I’m a love ‘em and leave ‘em kind of guy. Getting mixed up with another brother’s ol’ lady, or lack thereof in this case, was so not my style.
I was greeted at the bar by Lukas with that same shit-eating grin plastered across his face.
“You know what motherfucker. I’m tired of seein’ that goddamn smile of yours.”
Lukas slapped a hand on my shoulder, “I don’t give a fuck. You done with the pussy fest so we can get this shit taken care of?” Nodding my head I couldn’t help but think, I am for sure done with that one.
I grabbed the beer that was slid down the bar top to me before I noticed the rest of our boys making their way into the room.
“Goddamn! Been a long time since I saw you, ugly motherfuckers.” Pushing off the stool, I move towards the guys. Rush is the first to fist bump me when he’s close enough.
“Look at you, all grown up.” Laughter erupts from the guys around us. He always had made fun of my height. I did tower over a lot of the guys, though.
“You sure the fuck ain’t!” Nox walked up next, pulling me into a brief hug.
“How you been, Vape? Been a while, brother.” That it has. These guys were pretty straight back in the day.
“If we could get this shit taken care of with the Devils I’d be a hell of a lot better. These motherfuckers are movin’ in on us.” Archer didn’t look too pleased with what I’d just said. Hell, neither were we.
“I heard about that a while back. I was wonderin’ when you’d give us a call, but then shit got real with Grind...” Archer pulls out a chair from the table that we’d moved over to. I watched the guys as they sat down around me. This is what I love about my life. The fact that we can make a phone call and know who the fuck has our backs. We can pitch in for one another just like a family should. We might be different clubs but deep down, our roots are the same.
“I heard about that, man. I was sorry to fuckin’ hear it.” I said my useless platitudes just to get ‘em out of the fuckin’ way. We sat at the table just kicking back and talking. Drinking, reminiscing, and catching the boys up on the shit going on back down south.
Archer knew a few of the other guys that used to be in Black Diamond years ago. The way of our world took a lot of good men from us; it was a never ending process. There wasn’t a damn thing you could do about it either.
It was the chance you took sliding your arms into those colors every day. You risked the chance of going on a run and never coming home. The fact that I could be the next one rushes through my veins at every waking moment of my life. I’d be lying if I said the thought never crossed my mind. Hell, I thought about it all time, hence my hard and fast rule of disposable pussy only. Just like that little taste of pussy I took from Moira, I let the rest of it go. I couldn’t be what anyone needed, not when I couldn’t see past today to know what tomorrow would bring.
Nox excused himself, not liking where this talk was going. I couldn’t say that I blamed him, though. No one really wants to go to war, especially men with families waiting for them back home. This war, in particular, was gonna turn bloody. Lives were gonna be taken, never to be returned. It was a shit storm waiting to happen, and these two fucks had to go and get the full meal deal. Women, a wife, the two point five kids, house with a picket fence, the whole steaming pile. Fuck.
I still couldn’t believe that one of Archer. Nox, I wasn’t so surprised, but Arch really threw me. A fuckin’ wife and kids… I thought we were gonna be fucked until Rush spoke up.
“Let me make some phone calls, Vape. You’re not the only motherfucker that can collect.” He made eye contact with Archer whose mouth turned down before he nodded. Rush nodded back and I watched him push himself up and walk to the little glassed in room with thick dark curtains hiding what was inside. I was surprised to see the computers and all the surveillance equipment when he went inside. I didn’t know what kind of deal he was thinking he was going to make with those assholes, but I’d sure as hell like to find out.
I was left alone with Archer, which wasn’t so reassuring. Grinder and I were the ones who had had a fairly good friendship back in the day, but that didn’t stop bullshit from coming between us. Typically that bullshit came in the form of Archer being a fuckin’ killjoy, but that was what it was. Separate clubs will always have a load of shit to deal with, friendships come and go. Beefs develop, wars start, peace treaties get brokered, the way things go it ebbs and flows, kind of like the tides.
“Sorry to hear about, Grind. He really was a good guy,” I repeated, only this time there was some feeling behind it. Archer shrugs like it isn’t a big deal, but I knew that was a bullshit lie. Those four came up in the same house. Might as well have been blood, but Archer, he’s got his poker face on and he wasn’t about to falter.
“We aren’t friends anymore, Vape. It was a different life that got left behind back in AZ. I respect you the same as you do me. You’re here for help, to cash in, and we’ll pay our debts, man… but that’s as far as I’m willin’ to go.” Well, fuck me. He was beyond pissed we were here, I follow his gaze behind me until I see what he’s lookin’ at. It appeared to be this little blonde number standing with Moira and that brunette cunt, Cherry. Moira looked so sad, and for some reason, it kills a piece of me to see her like that. Although, I have no fucking idea why.
She looks wounded, and I could tell when I was balls deep in her, that she’d embraced this life, but at the same time, she wanted so much more out of this life than what she was getting. As much as I would like to lay claim to that hot little ass of hers, take her back to Cali, I was totally not what she wanted. Her eyes were clear as day when Lucky crashed into that room. I saw through her like an open door; she couldn’t hide it. She’s in love with that man and he was too fuckin’ blind to see it.
“Archer, I didn’t plan on that shit.” I’m being honest. “She was there, it was offered. I’m not apologizin’ for any of it.” Pulling my eyes away from hers even across the distance was harder than I’d like to admit. For whatever strange reason, I wanted to know why she hid. Why she didn’t just tell the man how she felt. It wasn’t my place, though. It never would be.
“You never did apologize for shit, Vape. Maybe that’s one of your goddamn problems.” Archer shoved out of his chair so quickly, it tumbled to the floor. I watched his boots pound the floor as he walked away from me, going to the blonde and pulling her into his arms, kissing her fiercely.
A lot of things play over in my head. I figured Arch wasn’t as pissed at me as I’d thought, though. If anything, he was more pissed over the fact we were here fuckin’ with his fairy tale ending. I was happy for him, him and Nox both. If I had to be honest, though? Moira seemed to be the main thought on my mind. It was actually driving me sort of insane to have a goddamn female on my brain the way she was. This wasn’t my normal, in fact, this was the exact opposite of any shit I’d ever had to deal with before. I was used to busting heads, not mending hearts.
• • •
Rush d
ropped into the chair in front of me with a smirk on his face.
“Thirty thousand.” Rush looks directly at me.
Lukas looks at me before looking back at Rush, “What the hell for?”
“They stay the hell out of your way. They don’t want a war, man. They heard you were up here and they don’t have the numbers or any other clubs to back them up right now. Those pansy ass motherfuckers are scared shitless of the two of our clubs comin’ their way to come to terms.”
When Lukas doesn’t speak, I do, “That’s a lot of money for something we could get just as easy through a little elbow grease.” Chuckling. I look over at Lukas and the thirty thousand is off the table judging by the look on his face.
“They got a chapter out this way, don’t they?” Lukas asked. Rush nodded his head slowly as a plan started to form in Lukas’s mind. I could see the goddamn gears turning. He leans back in his seat. “Set up a meet. We ride over there, deal with that chapter in person. They can relay the fuckin’ message that the offer is declined.” Rush’s eyes, the color of a good whiskey, come to meet mine. Well fuck, Lukas is the president, not me. I open my mouth to say as much but Lukas beat me to it.
“What the fuck you lookin’ at him for?” Lukas is on edge, has been since we got here. I hate seeing him like this but he knows this needs to be done.
“My brothers and I owe him, man.” Rush is short and to the point with Lukas. The fire inside Lukas though is threatening to spread.
“We meet. You good with that, Rush? You, me, Lukas, Nox, and Arch?” His eyes jerk to mine and hold there. The unanswered question lingers in the air before he asks it.
“What the hell happened just happened with, Archer, anyways?” Shrugging my shoulders, I grab my beer, taking a long pull.
“Difference of opinion.” Rush doesn’t question me further and I’m grateful for that.
I can see the look in Nox’s eyes, though, he doesn’t want to be in this anymore than Archer does. That silenced fear that nags at the back of a man’s mind is always there. No matter how fucking hard you think you are, that fear never leaves, and these dumb bastards had families now. That only makes shit that much worse on them.
“Let’s get it done then,” Nox says quietly. “I’ll tell Arch, run it by Dragon, and get Data to make contact to set up a meet.” With another quick nod from me, Nox stood, leaving Lukas and me at the table with Rush.
Thoughts run rampant through my head but they all collide and end on the sad little redhead at the table near the pool table. Why the hell is the pull to her so strong? Why do I even give a shit what happens to her? She isn’t mine, she isn’t anything but another fuck in my book. Yet there she is, front and center.
Taking another drink, Lukas watches me warily. I know the motherfucker has something to say, I wished he’d just fucking get on with it.
“Say it, Lukas. Since when you hold back?” His lip curls slightly before he lets me have it. I didn’t even see the shit coming.
“You make your own rules, Vape. I get that you were offered up some free pussy but since when do you take that shit up with the one girl you know you probably shouldn’t?” That sounded more like a statement to me than a fucking question. Why the fuck does Lukas even give a shit what I’m doing any damn way? I’m pretty sure that if he didn’t have his old lady back home, he’d be fucking half the damn sluts in this clubhouse!
“Your mouth is takin’ you places, Lukas. Since when does it matter what fuckin’ bitch I fuck? You never gave a shit before, why now?” His hands clamp together in front of him before he leans onto the table.
“You know why. You need to check that shit, Vape. You can’t keep ruinin’ every fuckin’ girl you come across. That shit’s fucked any way you look at it.” Well fuck me, there sits Saint Lukas.
“I don’t have shit back home like you. Since when do you get involved in who the hell I’m fuckin’?” Slamming my hands on the table, he eyes me. I may be crossing a line here but he’s about done talking to me like he’s a fucking god.
“Since you always take the broken ones, Vape! You take their pieces and smash them a little more, push them a little further.” He’s beyond pissed. I can’t say that if the roles were reversed I’d be any different, though. I didn’t want to hurt them, leave them worse off than I found them, it just sort of happens that way and Moira seemed to be no different right now, but at the same time, she was. I tried to explain it to my cousin and president…
“She don’t see me like that, Lukas. She knew what it was. She isn’t that fucked. Besides, I’m pretty sure she has a man lookin’ out for her here. Whether she sees it or not, I don’t fuckin’ know.” Lukas sighs before relaxing a little.
“Let’s just handle this shit with the Devils. I want to go the fuck home and fuck my old lady.” With a grunt, I push up out of the chair when Moira walks over.
“Hey.” Her eyes are red from crying. Again, I don’t know why I give a shit. My hand involuntarily comes up to wipe at a stray bit of blurry makeup. Her lips curl into a soft smile.
“Hey, sweetheart. You doin’ ok?” She nodded her head, causing her red hair to tumble over her shoulder. As good as it was feeling that hair tickle my skin as I fucked her senseless, there was more to her than that.
“I heard you guys were going to meet with the Devils,” she whispers. How in the fuck? Eavesdropping. Shaking my head, I let my hand fall from her cheek before she takes it in her tiny hand.
“Just be careful, ok.” What the hell is happening here? I don’t get this shit at all. First, she was sucking my dick like a pro, then her man that isn’t her man stormed my ass and now this? I think I picked the wrong goddamn woman to fuck here.
“I’m never careful. There ain’t a pussy in the world that could change that.” I don’t know if she doesn’t want to see it or that she just doesn’t care that my sarcastic ass just said that to her. Either way, she doesn’t bat an eye.
“Devils can be rough, all the girls say so.” Pulling my hand away from hers, she let it go, I watched as she pulled her own back into the sleeves of that oversized hoodie.
“I’m rough. I don’t need some woman tellin’ me how to handle myself, darlin’. You do you, I got me.” I didn’t mean to come off as such an asshole but the girl was gone on that Sacred Heart, Lucky. Her heart was focused on the wrong guy by bein’ focused on me right now.
• • •
I left Moira standing alone when we left. I didn’t have it in me to say anymore. I hurt for her. She was so torn that she didn’t know which way was up. It reminded me of my own mother, but for different reasons. My mother was sort of a hot head, emotional in such a way she never knew which way to turn. My dad didn’t necessarily want her, he wanted me, though. The son he’d always wanted. He would have done anything in his power to keep me, but then again, so would she. She fought hard and sacrificed so much to keep us both. She was torn between the two men in her life. She loved my dad, and I don’t think that ever stopped or changed, but she loved me, too and I can’t say that I made that easy on her, either.
Once I was old enough, I turned into an asshole like my dad. I followed him around, being what he was; a hateful bastard. Which is exactly what I turned out to be, despite my mom’s best intentions.
One day, my dad had come home in a rage. Took all his hatred out on my mom. At first, I didn’t try to stop him. I thought that was the way of the world. My dad showed me that that was the way. Women needed to be owned; know their place, or so he’d said. My dad preached that the women in his life, in my life, needed to have some kind of discipline to keep them in line. That they should never falter from their man’s side.
I’d played off those words. Except for that night? I watched the devil come alive in that man. He beat my mother until she couldn’t see straight. I finally stepped in; I couldn’t handle seeing it anymore. The way she looked up at me through her swelling eye. It fucking ripped my heart out. It was the first time I’d tried to defend her and it wouldn’t be the l
ast.
She was the only woman that I’d ever loved. I’ve never found one that could measure up to what she was. In my mind, she was the perfect woman. Loyal, loving, always doing the best she could, not only for me but for my dad, who treated her like shit.
I can still remember the day my dad beat the life out of her for good. She was beautiful, looked like an angel that night. She’d been dressed in her long silk nightgown as she waited for my dad to come home. She didn’t get the reaction that she’d hoped for. He’d come in the house high out of his fucking mind and I saw the rage in him the second he stepped through the door. He went straight for her like a caged animal recently freed into the wild. He was fierce in his intent. He grabbed her by the throat, squeezing as tightly as he could. I couldn’t stand it. I flew at him, unhinged myself. I didn’t match up the evil that’d been brewed in him. He was high on something and I wasn’t strong enough.
I watched her lifeless body fall on the floor in front of me. So beautiful, like an angel. She’d been my angel. She’d always tried to do what was right by me, and I didn’t accept it. I’d turned into a monster all my own. A monster she’d never meant to create but it was inevitable. There was no other way. I was my father’s son, too.
Shaking my head, I pull myself back into reality. I wonder if that’s why Moira struck me the way she did. She reminded me of my mom. Forced to choose between what her heart wanted and what life was handing her. It was a tough road to walk.
I sat back, honestly not even vaguely listening to any of the meets with the Devils. I just didn’t care what they worked out anymore. If they wanted a war, I could give them one. Our club didn’t need the extra amount of shit but I was game for it.
“Thirty thousand ain’t happenin’. I don’t know why the fuck that was even something they would offer in the first place unless they were tryin’ to be insulting.” I couldn’t resist, of course, I needed to put my two cents in. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t.
When Clubs Collide Page 30