by Sue Brown
“Good for you. What do you want? A medal? Where’s Sam?” Toby looked around as though he expected Sam to appear.
“I threw him out into the storm. Go look for him.” Gabriel shut the front door with a snap and stalked after his visitor. “He’s asleep. Go into the front room before you wake him.”
As he turned, Toby had a smile playing about his lips.
“What?” Gabriel snapped.
Toby tilted his head. “Nothing. How is he?”
“Nothing my arse. You never mean nothing. What do you want?”
“I’ve come to see my patient.”
“He’s in Michael’s room,” Gabriel said reluctantly. He looked away as Toby’s eyes opened comically wide. “What?”
Toby gently gripped his forearm. “Are you okay with him sleeping in Michael’s room?”
Gabriel pressed his lips together. “I couldn’t leave him on the sofa.”
“He could’ve slept in your bed and you sleep on the sofa.”
“Just leave it, Toby.” Gabriel didn’t need an inquest on where his guest had slept.
Thankfully Toby dropped the subject, instead hugging him swiftly with one arm. “I’ll check on Sam, and you can make me a coffee.”
“Why am I always making you coffee?” Gabriel grumbled.
“One, you never come over, and two, your tea is shite. Go, go.” Toby shooed Gabriel towards the kitchen and headed into Michael’s room, pausing to knock quietly at the door.
Gabriel grumbled under his breath the whole time he made the coffee, but by the time he placed a tray on his coffee table, his mood had improved. Toby still wasn’t back, so Gabriel picked up his mug and went outside. The storm had blown over, and he sucked in the salt-tang of the sea air like a drug. Before he met Jenny, he’d been a city boy and had never visited Cornwall. Now he couldn’t imagine living anywhere else.
He usually woke in the early morning and walked out to the cliffs to stand solitary vigil. Gabriel’s stomach clenched as it always did when he thought about his wife and son. He and Jenny used to sit on the large rock at the top of the path, her slight body resting in his arms and her fragrant hair tickling his nose. When Michael arrived on the scene, he would sleep in the pushchair as Gabriel and Jenny traded kisses over a picnic.
Today he’d slept in, and there were more tourists on the cliff path. He said good morning to one or two who passed him, and then he took his place and looked out to the horizon. Sunlight sparkled on the tips of the waves as they chased across the sea only to break on the shore. Thanks to a strong wind, the sea was still choppy, and Gabriel couldn’t see anyone in the water.
Footsteps crunching on the gravelled path disturbed Gabriel’s reverie, and he looked over his shoulder to see Toby slowly ambling towards him as he sipped from the mug.
“Is he okay?” Gabriel asked.
“Sam is fine. He’s remarkably resilient considering what he went through.”
“Where is he?” Gabriel looked back to the cottage, worried about leaving him alone.
“He’s gone for a shower. He knows we’re out here.” Toby sucked down a long swallow of coffee. “God, I needed that.”
Gabriel saw the dark marks under Toby’s blood-shot eyes. “Did you get any sleep last night?”
Toby yawned loudly. “Not more than half an hour at a time. But I’m off duty now. Dr Willis is on call, and I can go to bed.”
“What’re you doing here, then?” Gabriel asked in an exasperated tone.
“Checking on my patient.”
Gabriel huffed. “I would’ve called if his condition had deteriorated.”
“I meant you, dipshit.” Toby turned to look at Gabriel. “You’re the one I’m worried about.”
There were so many ways Gabriel could have responded, but most of them involved curse words, and Toby was peculiarly sensitive to being sworn at. “What on earth for? I’m not the one who nearly died last night.”
“You’ve got a strange man in your son’s bed.”
“You’re the one who insisted I put him there,” Gabriel pointed out.
“I just wanted to make sure you were keeping it together. I’m not blind to the fact I’m the only person you’ve allowed in the house since Jenny died.”
“That’s not true,” Gabriel scoffed. He stopped as Toby raised an eyebrow. Damn, was it true? Gabriel thought back over the past year, but after the funerals, he couldn’t remember any visitors. People had tried, but he’d sent them all away. Only Toby hadn’t taken no for an answer. “It’s only because I can’t get rid of you. You’re like a boil on my arse.”
“Nice analogy.” Toby snorted. “Thanks for that, Gabriel.”
“You’re welcome. Hopefully we can find out who Sam really is today, and he can go home.” Gabriel slurped down the rest of his coffee. “I forgot to tell you, he had a nightmare. Kept saying someone was trying to kill him.”
Toby furrowed his brow. “That doesn’t sound good.”
“I woke him up, but he didn’t remember it,” Gabriel said.
“I don’t suppose it’s something you’d want to remember. You should talk to him later.”
It was Gabriel’s turn to frown. “Do you think it’s real or just a dream?”
“Who knows? We really need to get Sam to the hospital to get some X-rays. You can do that later when the road is open. The council said it should be clear by early afternoon. You can visit the police station at the same time and see if anyone has reported him missing.”
“I’ve got work to do,” Gabriel objected.
“Tough. He needs you,” Toby snapped and then was overcome by another huge yawn. He handed his mug back to Gabriel. “I’ve got to sleep. I’ll call you later.”
Gabriel glared at Toby but managed a reasonably sympathetic “Get some rest.”
Toby laid his hand on Gabriel’s shoulder. “I know this is hard for you, but at the moment, Sam needs you.”
A crunch on the gravel distracted Gabriel, and he looked over Toby’s shoulder to see Sam picking his way towards them. He wasn’t wearing any shoes, and he winced as the gravel dug into his feet.
“Jesus, Gabriel, you couldn’t have found him some shoes?” Toby rushed over to help Sam with the last few steps until he reached the grassy section.
“I didn’t think about it until I reached the gravel,” Sam said.
“Shoes weren’t the first thing on my mind last night,” Gabriel pointed out. “Morning, Sam. How’re you feeling?”
He smiled tentatively at him. “Better than I did last night.”
Gabriel stared at him for a long moment, noticing his long copper hair caught by the light breeze and his dark, stormy eyes almost a deep blue-grey in the late morning light. He was jogged out of his study by a light cough.
“Well, I have to go, children. See you later.” Toby beamed at Sam and gave an all-too-knowing smile at Gabriel. Without waiting for a response, he picked his way lightly across the gravel back in the direction of his cottage.
“Is he always like this?” Sam asked as Gabriel scowled at Toby’s retreating back.
“Usually he’s worse,” Gabriel said sourly.
“You seem like an old married couple,” he said and then, “God, I’m sorry, that was thoughtless of me.”
Gabriel forced himself not to flinch at the pain of his words. “It’s okay. We do bicker like that, even more than Jenny and I did. Toby’s probably the only reason I haven’t thrown myself off a cliff since the accident. He’s yelled and stamped and made me live, even when all I wanted to do was be with Jenny and Michael.” He stopped, unable to talk past the lump in his throat. Instead he looked at the horizon and thought about the number of times he’d stood in this exact spot, one breath away from taking the final step off the cliff. Gabriel startled as Sam laid a hand on his arm. He looked down at Sam’s hand. He had fine, long fingers compared to Gabriel’s and manicured nails, and there was a whiter band of skin where a ring used to be. Not the right finger for a wedding ring. Maybe he’d be
en robbed? Then how had he ended up in the boat?
“I’m so sorry,” Sam said gently.
Gabriel gathered himself together and forced himself to smile. He shouldn’t be the one worrying about him. From the way Sam’s look eased, he was at least partially successful. “Would you like something to eat?”
Sam nodded. “I am hungry. Toast? I think I like toast.”
“I can do toast. I’ve even got homemade strawberry jam.”
“You make jam?”
At Sam’s sceptical look, Gabriel laughed, and it eased the knot inside him. “You think I can’t make jam?”
“I… er….” Sam searched for a way to extract his foot from his mouth. “It doesn’t seem like something you’d do. I didn’t mean to be rude.”
Gabriel gave another chuckle. “It’s okay. I can’t make jam. Toby made it. It’s his hobby. It helps clear his mind.”
“In which case, it’s probably safe to try it.” Sam smirked, and they both laughed.
“Come on.” Gabriel looked at the gravel. “Do you want me to carry you across the stones?”
Sam scoffed. “I can walk across gravel.”
“It’s up to you.” He watched as Sam started back to the cottage, wincing at every step. “Stay there. No one is around to see you lose a little dignity.”
Sam hesitated and then said, “Please. I was an idiot to come out without shoes on.”
Gabriel picked him up, and Sam wound his arms around his neck. His nose itched as Sam’s hair got in his face, but he felt light in his arms, so different from the previous night when he’d been weighed down by sodden clothes. Gabriel crunched across the stones to the grass near his cottage. “I’ll carry you to the door.”
“Gabriel?”
He growled under his breath and turned to see Sandra Whitely, one of his neighbours, looking at him, her eyebrows lost under her fringe. Gabriel set Sam down on a patch of grass free from stones and pasted a smile on for his neighbour.
“Morning, Sandra.”
“Morning, Gabriel. You have… company?”
“Sam, this is Sandra, one of my neighbours. Sandra, this is Sam. He’s… er… staying with me for a few days.”
“Pleased to meet you.” Sandra held out her hand and then narrowed her eyes, tilting her head to study Sam closely. “Are those Jenny’s clothes?”
Sam glanced at Gabriel and then nodded. “Gabriel kindly loaned me these as mine got wet in the storm.”
“You’re staying at Gabriel’s place?”
Gabriel gritted his teeth at the wealth of meaning implied in her voice. “Sam is visiting for a couple of days.”
Sandra shot him an incredulous look. “You have a visitor?”
Gabriel growled under his breath. “Must go, Sandra. See you later.” He put a hand at the small of Sam’s back, guided him away from his nosy neighbour, and sighed with relief when he shut the door. “Dammit.”
Sam looked over his shoulder at him. “Am I missing something?”
“They’re not used to seeing me with guests,” Gabriel said shortly. “I’ve not had many guests since Jenny and Michael died.” None at all, according to Toby.
His expression softened. “That’s understandable. I can’t imagine you’ve felt like being sociable.”
“No. But my friends think it’s about time I moved on. I give it five minutes before Brian, her husband, is banging on the door.”
He turned and shook his head. “They’re wrong. You don’t move on from something like that. You learn to live with it, but it’s not something you leave behind. When my parents died I….” Sam stared up at him, his breath catching. “My parents are dead.”
Gabriel saw the tears brim in his eyes. “I’m so sorry. You remember this?”
“I don’t know how, but I know. I can feel it inside.” He clenched a fist over his heart.
They stared at each other for a moment, and Gabriel felt a knot ease inside. It was a relief to be with someone who understood. Everyone had been sympathetic since his world fell apart, but now they were getting impatient with his grief, and he felt their impatience pressing down on him like a heavy weight.
He sighed and rubbed his eyes. “Do you want a coffee?”
“I hate coffee,” Sam admitted. Then his eyes opened wide. “Wow, I remember that too.”
Gabriel grinned at him. “What would you rather drink?”
“I don’t know,” he admitted with a slight laugh. “What do you suggest?”
“I think I’ve got tea bags somewhere.” Gabriel went into the kitchen and opened a cupboard. He spotted a couple of boxes and let out a triumphant cry. “You’re in luck. Normal tea or mint tea?” He held the two boxes out to Sam. “I have to confess I don’t know how long they’ve been in there.”
“I’ll take the risk,” Sam said. “I survived a storm. I can risk an old teabag.” Gabriel did his best to hold back a wince as he took the kettle over to the sink, but Sam must have realised he’d touched a nerve, because he said, “I’m sorry, Gabriel. I seem to be saying that a lot today.”
Gabriel shut off the tap and turned to look at him. “It’s okay. You did survive. I can’t hate you for that.”
“I survived because of you,” he pointed out.
“That’s true.” Gabriel switched on the kettle. “I guess it’s all my fault. Milk and sugar?”
“Eh?”
“Your tea. Milk and sugar. Don’t think, just answer.”
“A little milk and two sugars,” he said without hesitation. “I’ve no idea if that’s right or not.”
Gabriel looked in the box of tea bags. “You’ve got a few times to get it right.”
Chapter 4—Sam
SAM TOOK a tentative sip of the tea and grinned at Gabriel. “Perfect.”
Gabriel raised a dark eyebrow. “How do you keep that figure if you drink tea with two sugars?”
“I….” He looked down at his flat belly and lean hips. “I have no idea.”
“Well, if I catch you jogging along the cliffs, we’ll know how.”
He hadn’t finished the mug when there was a knock at the door. Gabriel frowned, his thick brows knitting together. He stomped over to the front door and flung it open.
“Brian,” he said, his lack of enthusiasm obvious.
Sam held back a smile. Gabriel had been spot on about his neighbours.
Brian—Sam judged him to be around forty—stood on his doorstep, shifting restlessly from foot to foot. “I… er….” His gaze landed on Sam, and his eyes widened. “You have a….”
“A guest. Yes. I have a guest,” Gabriel snapped. “Brian, this is Sam. Sam, this is Brian Whitely, a neighbour. Is that it? Bye, then.”
From Gabriel’s angry tone, Sam expected him to slam the door in Brian’s face, but Brian stuck his arm out and walked into the cottage, a broad smile on his face as he headed for Sam.
“Really pleased to meet you. Sam was it?” He held out his hand to him.
Sam looked for somewhere to put his mug and found a side table. Then he stood and took Brian’s hand. From his vigorous handshake, he really was pleased to make Sam’s acquaintance. “Pleased to meet you, Brian. You’re Gabriel’s neighbour?”
“We’ve been neighbours for years,” Brian said. “Goodness, I didn’t believe Sandra when she said Gabriel had a guest, but here you are.”
After a moment of awkwardly smiling at each other, Sam withdrew his hand and looked around for his tea. “Sandra is your wife?”
“Oh yes. She and Jenny were friends at school.” Brian’s smiled faded. “Did you ever meet Jenny?”
Sam shook his head. “I wasn’t lucky enough to meet her. I only met Gabriel yesterday.”
Brian turned on Gabriel. “That was quick, man. I mean—”
Sighing, Gabriel rubbed his forehead. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. I spotted Sam’s boat in the storm. I saw it was in trouble, so I took the dinghy out.”
“It was a good thing he did. I was unconscious, and my boat was taking on wat
er. If it hadn’t been for him, I’d have drowned.” Sam shivered as he thought about it.
“Don’t,” Gabriel said gruffly and squeezed his arm. “You’re safe now.”
Sam caught Brian’s wide-eyed curious expression and decided to focus on his tea. He had no idea how much Gabriel wanted to let on about him.
“Well, I—” Brian started, but Gabriel cut him off.
“Once the tree is cleared off the road, we’re going to see about getting Sam home. Anyway, nice to see you again, Brian. Is that all?”
This time Brian took the hint and said, “I must be getting back. Nice to meet you, Sam.”
Sam smiled. “And you, Brian.”
Once the door was closed on his very curious neighbour, Gabriel rested his head on the wood and let out a long sigh. “The whole village is going to know now.”
Sam drew up his knees and wrapped his arms around his legs. “I’m sorry, Gabriel.”
“It’s not your fault.”
It would have been more convincing if Gabriel had managed to look at him instead of talking to the door.
“Gabriel, look at me.”
Gabriel turned, reluctance oozing from him. If Sam had known him better, he would have walked over and taken him in his arms for a comforting hug, but he barely knew the man apart from his pain.
“At least my arrival will give the village something new to gossip about,” Sam suggested.
Gabriel gave a bark of laughter. “You understand village life.”
“It’s the same everywhere.” Sam paused. “At least, I think it is.”
“You’re right, and especially here.” Gabriel sat down in his chair and expelled a long breath. “I love my neighbours, but you can’t keep any secrets.”
“It didn’t help that Sandra caught me in your arms,” Sam pointed out, grinning as Gabriel groaned. “By the time it gets back to Toby, I’ll be wearing a silk dress and called Samantha.”
Gabriel’s face snorted. “Knowing Toby, he’d come over with fashion tips.”
Sam stared, then burst out laughing. From what little he’d seen of Toby, he could imagine that too. “What was it like? Being married to a twin?” He saw the grief cross Gabriel’s face and cursed his wayward thoughts. Then Gabriel gave a wistful smile.