The Chaos of Luck

by Catherine Cerveny

  “So what about Venus?”

  “As I said, they settled in an area before it was properly surveyed, and now it appears they’re on a fault line. A very dangerous and potentially active one. Do we forcibly relocate them or let them take their chances? If we leave them, they could die if there’s a shift in the tectonic plates. If we move them, we risk making an already troublesome group even more rebellious. It won’t be easy to relocate them, but if a quake hits, then what? We’ve already weighed the costs of both scenarios, but we can’t predict what might happen.”

  “But you think I could?”

  He shrugged. “Merely asking a hypothetical question.”

  I eyed him warily. “I don’t have my cards.”

  “If you did, could you determine the best outcome?”

  “Probably.”

  “I only want to find the solution with the least number of causalities. But I also understand your reservations. I don’t want to pressure you. I’m merely asking you to think about what the result could be.”

  I sighed. “I’m not opposed to using my luck to help others. That’s what I do in my Tarot readings, after all. And it’s what Monique did when she created…” I let the sentence fade, not sure how to finish it.

  “I know what she did,” he said gently. “Is that why you left Petriv? Was he using you to read for the Consortium?”

  I hung my head. “No. He never asked me to read for him, though I did it anyway. He didn’t want me to think that’s why he was with me.”

  “Ah. Well, he’s a better man than I imagined. Better than I am, and I’m your own flesh and blood. I shouldn’t be taking advantage of you. I’m sorry for asking this of you.”

  “Don’t worry. My family uses me all the time. It’s what they do for kicks, I think.”

  “And I’m doubly sorry to hear that. It’s seems Petriv may have been the only one not using you.”

  That startled me, and made my heart jolt unexpectedly in my chest. I sniffed, looking down at my plate. “I left Alexei because we can’t have a baby. More specifically, he can’t with me or with anyone apparently, and he lied about it. He let me think we had a future together and…and we didn’t.”

  He reached across the table and took my hand in his. “If I may speak so boldly, you know he did it because he didn’t want to lose you.”

  “He still lied,” I said stubbornly. “That’s the one thing I asked him never to do, but he did it anyway.”

  “But it must have been difficult for him knowing he couldn’t give you what you wanted most. Perhaps he thought the lies were justified if it kept you with him. Fear can make even the smartest among us do very stupid things, and Petriv is more intelligent than most. It would be challenging for anyone in your situation. I doubt few relationships would pull through unscathed under that sort of pressure. It must have terrified him knowing he couldn’t give you everything he thought you wanted.”

  I gasped at that, finally realizing what Felipe was saying and what I’d been too upset these past few weeks to see. I’d been so angry Alexei had lied to me, just like he was always lying, I couldn’t see my own faults. I’d treated him the same way Dante had treated me when I’d told him about my blacklisted status. Instead of supporting Alexei, I’d left him just as I’d been left. I thought Dante and I would be together forever, yet when he’d learned the truth, he told me we were finished and smashed my heart into a million pieces. And now I’d done the same to Alexei.

  At least my blacklisted status could be revoked. He had less control over his situation than I did. For Alexei, there was no changing who he was. He’d been afraid to tell me because he thought I couldn’t accept it. And once again when I learned the truth, I’d run away. Even worse, I’d been turning to Brody this whole time, pushed by a gut feeling I had to fight to ignore, because he was the quickest route to securing whatever it was luck thought I needed. And Alexei had watched helplessly as it unfolded under his nose because he didn’t know how to prevent it from happening.

  “Oh gods, how could I do this to him?” I whispered, tears rising. I swiped at them with the napkin from my lap. “I’m a horrible person.”

  “Not horrible. Just confused and hurt.” Then he was quiet, holding my hand while I reined in my emotions. “May I tell you something?” I shrugged, not trusting myself to speak. He must have taken that as a yes because he continued with, “My daughter was gifted. Extremely intelligent, perhaps to a fault. And yes, it may have driven her insane. I think she found it frustrating dealing with us mere mortals. While I’ve read her research, even I don’t understand everything she wanted to accomplish. However, one thing she knew with certainty and it bore out in all her research was the luck gene always struck true wherever it was applied. And she believed with absolute conviction, as odd and as twisted as this may sound, that you and Petriv could have a child.”

  That brought my head up. “How can you be so sure? The Consortium’s been studying this for years. Wouldn’t they have considered this by now?”

  “Unlikely, since they didn’t have access to you or Monique’s research. And if I may say it without sounding like a boastful father, I would trust my daughter’s genius over any Consortium think tank.”

  It made sense, but none of it explained my gut reaction to Brody. How did he factor into this? If I could have the future I wanted with Alexei, why did I feel pushed in another direction?

  “I can see you’re skeptical. If I may offer one more piece of unsolicited information, I know Konstantin Belikov. I’ve tangled with him for decades and I hate that man as much as I respect him. If he thought it would give him an advantage, he would withhold information as he saw fit. How do you really know you and Petriv are incompatible if you only trust the Consortium’s word? How do you know Belikov isn’t lying?” Then he let go of my hand, retreating to his side of the table. “I’m not certain Alexei Petriv is the right man for you, but I do think he loves you, despite his many faults.”

  I was silent, staring at my dinner on my very fancy and probably very expensive plate with its One Gov emblem on it, thinking about nothing and everything. “Can I ask you how you know Brody Williams?”

  Felipe looked surprised, as if I’d thrown him a curve he wasn’t expecting. “Is there a reason you’re asking?”

  “Just curious why he seems to be involved in all of this.”

  He thought a moment. “Well, at one point he was up and coming in One Gov’s ranks. I remember him being brought to my attention because he had potential and his name was associated with yours. Even though Monique forbade me to contact you and kept your grandmother and me at a distance, I still had reports about you. When he was reassigned to Mars, I lost track of him. Frankly, since he was out of your life, I stopped paying attention. I found it odd he was with you again when we met recently, and when I investigated, I saw he worked for the Consortium. When I looked further, I noticed a three-year gap in his personal history. Whatever he’s done during that time, I couldn’t say.”

  I think my jaw dropped at that. Brody had three years of time that couldn’t be accounted for? What the hell was going on? I pushed my plate away, no longer hungry and more stumped than upset. “Please excuse me, but I think I’m done for the evening. I should check my bracelet. I haven’t turned it on in weeks. It’s probably going to crash the CN-net once I start going through my messages. And…I need to think about what I’m going to do next. I can’t stay here forever.”

  “There’s always Earth,” he suggested gently.

  Yes, Earth was an option but I wasn’t ready to run that far yet. “I should probably figure out things here first before I give up entirely.”

  “The offer is always open. And I’ll be staying on Mars for a while longer. It’s been at least a decade since I was here last and it’s more interesting than I recall previously. I don’t plan on making the return trip for at least another year.”

  I’m sure my eyebrows reached my hairline. “A whole year away from Earth? What about Secretary Ar
kell? Or your wife?”

  “They’ll make do without me. I have no doubt of that.” Then he shrugged and grinned at me when I continued to stare. “What can I say? Things are happening and I’d hate to miss them. Besides, it will give us time to get to know each other, and that isn’t such a bad thing.”

  “I guess not,” I said slowly. “I assume we’re not going to spend all our time pruning rosebushes.”

  “It could be a different sort of pruning, though who can say for sure?” Again the grin, and again I could see how the man had three mistresses.

  “If I had my cards, I could look into that Venus issue for you,” I said finally.

  “I’ll see what I can do. I confess, I would be interested in the answer.”

  “Someday, I’ll have to read your cards for you,” I said, getting up from the table.

  He laughed. “I’m actually afraid of what you might see.” Then his expression grew thoughtful. “Before you go, I wondered if I could invite you to a charity gala being held tomorrow night—if you’re feeling up to it. It’s a One Gov–sponsored event and I’d like it if I could introduce you as my granddaughter.”

  I wondered how long he’d wanted to ask, but been afraid to broach the subject. It wasn’t like galas sprung up overnight. I could think of a hundred reasons why going would be a terrible idea. Reasons I’m sure he already knew and probably some I hadn’t even thought of yet. I decided to see him as a lonely man full of regrets who wanted to reach out to me rather than everything else he was. Maybe I’d feel differently in time, but right then, I couldn’t bring myself to dwell on what his faults might be.

  So I said, “I’d say yes, but I don’t think I have anything in my closet that says ‘charity gala.’”

  He looked so relieved, I almost laughed. It loosened some of the tightness in my chest that my answer made him so happy.

  “I could get you a dress.”

  “And it’s only One Gov personnel attending?”

  “Primarily One Gov, yes. It is still a charity event, sponsoring reef and coral seeding projects in the Utopian Ocean. Anyone with enough gold notes to donate would be invited.”

  But if it was a One Gov event, it was unlikely anyone from the Consortium would be there just on general principle alone.

  “Alright then,” I said as I powered on my bracelet. As anticipated, it started vibrating so violently, I took it off, set it on the table, and watched it dance across the granite. “Looks like I’m going to the gala.”

  Chapter Twenty-one

  As soon as I saw the dress in my closet, I was breathless with excitement. It was white, strapless, flared at the knees, and embellished with sea foam green crystal flowers that started at the waist and grew more plentiful at the bottom until it resembled a sea foam green garden. It looked like something I’d once marked in a CN-net target ad—something I could never afford and only drool over from afar.

  When I worked up the courage to examine the laser-stamp inside, I saw it was a House of Christien original—the most prestigious fashion house on Mars. I immediately jumped back from the dress, afraid my unworthy presence would contaminate the very air around it. Obviously being One Gov Under-Secretary had more perks than I realized. Then because I couldn’t stay away, I approached carefully and gently petted the fabric, helplessly in love. To wear that dress, I would have gone anywhere and done anything Vieira asked. I sighed at how easily I was consoled by something so frivolous. Even as my world fell apart, show me a pretty dress and I was happy—at least for a little while.

  I also found open-toed platforms, their heels cleverly constructed crystal flowers that echoed those on the dress. I put them on and spent more time then I cared to admit admiring them in my room’s full-length mirror. At that point, I realized I’d need a complete physical overhaul. After two weeks of letting myself go, I was a mess. I found Andreza and explained my dilemma. Within an hour, she arranged for an army of professionals to whip me back into shape.

  I spent the afternoon enjoying a spa day, all without leaving the comfort of my room. First an all-over skin renewal treatment to eliminate the redness and swelling from my two bee sting welts and the numerous thorn scratches covering me. Next, a massage. Then a skin-softening bath using a trendy new glitter finish I’d never tried. After that came nails, hair, and makeup, until I couldn’t keep track of the parade of people fawning over me. It was so over-the-top frivolous, I wished Lotus were there just so I had someone I could roll my eyes with. Somewhere between the laser touch up to my bikini area—which had been unnecessary in my opinion—and the little sandwiches with their crust cut off that tasted like heaven, my Tarot cards were hand-delivered to me.

  The last time I’d seen them was two weeks ago, spread out on Eleat after the family picnic, in the hopes I could air out the burnt smell. I’d had a vague fear I might never see them again. Yet there they were—in a brand-new travel case, no less. They’d been nano-dipped so the smell was gone and the colors were vibrant and crisp. Somebody, and it wasn’t me, had made sure my cards were restored to pristine condition.

  I let out the breath I’d been holding, trying not to burst into tears. I’d like to think Felipe had arranged it, but that was unlikely. Only Alexei knew how particular I was about Granny G’s cards. Only he would have done this. I had another unsettling thought: How had Felipe even gotten my cards? Were he and Alexei talking to each other? About me? Now there was an uncomfortable feeling.

  When I had a free moment, I laid a spread to answer Felipe’s Venus question. At first, the task seemed daunting. This issue was so important, I was terrified I might make a mistake. What variables should I consider? What card would be the Significator? Could any one card represent a whole town? The more I pondered how to tackle it, the most excited I became. I’d never done a reading like this before, and certainly nothing that could affect so many lives. When I finally worked out how I wanted to proceed, I dealt the cards. What I saw made me frown. Things didn’t look good for the colony on Aphrodite Terra. They needed to be moved within the next few weeks to a month or people would die. I sent Felipe a shim with my results and told him I’d explain when I saw him.

  Eventually, my spa army finished fussing, leaving me to marvel at myself in the mirror. I was afraid to move because, frankly, I worried I’d ruin something. I looked amazing and that was saying something, considering I had no genetic modifications except what I’d inherited from my mother. I knew I was pretty and fit within One Gov’s genetic specifications, but I wasn’t in the same league as women with actual beauty MH Factors. But right then, I could compete with the best of them.

  The dress was perfect, clinging to all the right curves. It was surprisingly light, considering the crystals weighing it down and how it swept along the floor. You couldn’t see my shoes, which was too bad since they were so cute. Aside from a few tendrils to frame my face, my hair had been pulled back at the base of my neck into a heavy knot, secured with a wreath of sea foam roses. One of the beauty army attendants had wanted to tint my eyebrows and eyelashes sea foam green—color matching was all the rage. I’d vetoed it and insisted my makeup be kept light and natural. The dress looked and felt like a summer’s day, and I wanted the makeup to reflect that. Besides, the glitter bath had my olive-toned skin glowing enough already. I knew drama, but I also knew stupid. I was the Under-Secretary’s granddaughter, and now wasn’t the time for green eyebrows. Lastly, I wore a necklace and earrings that sparkled in the light—the perfect finishing touch. That, and my c-tex bracelet currently vibrating on my wrist.

  When I’d turned it on last night, it had vibrated the whole evening as it struggled to load the shims I’d received over the past two weeks. Some were from family, especially Lotus, who sounded nearly rabid that she couldn’t reach me. Others were from former clients wanting to book private appointments. There were some from Brody, wanting to know if I was okay. But the majority were from Alexei—more than I had time to read even if I dedicated several hours to the task. They were of va
rious lengths, coming at all hours. Telling me he missed me. He loved me. He was sorry. He wanted to see me.

  In some, he talked about his worries regarding Konstantin. Then, what he thought of the new homunculus. Or how he’d almost cracked Konstantin’s memory blocks. I felt his growing sense of disillusionment with the Consortium’s aims and how they had changed from what he’d always believed them to be. Some shims were about what he had for lunch, what he saw in front of him, or what he was doing in a particular moment—just random observations he wanted to share.

  And lastly were the shims that were downright pornographic. In them, he described things we’d done together and things he still wanted to do to me in such graphic and explicit detail, I felt myself flush. But that was unsurprising, given his advanced t-mods and memory blocks. He could recall everything with a clarity I couldn’t, and he’d filled up a significant portion of his memory blocks with thoughts about…me.

  I had to stop reading because there were just too many, with more still incoming. I could have blocked him or told him to stop, but I didn’t want to. I just wanted…I didn’t know what I wanted. I was upset, confused, and still in love with him. Sorting my feelings for him in light of Felipe’s revelations would be a problem for tomorrow.

  It was nearly 6:00 p.m. when I declared myself ready. Tonight, I’d be Felipe Vieira’s granddaughter and see what I thought of the role. For now, I had to get through the gala. It included a dinner, a dance, and a charity auction. The last time I’d been to something like this, it had been a year ago on Earth and ended in disaster. Hopefully this didn’t go the same route.

  Felipe stood at the bottom of the staircase, his hands behind his back as he paced. With him was an army of One Gov hooahs in their black dress uniforms rather than the more militant, shoot-’em-up ones I was familiar with.

  He stopped pacing and smiled at me, holding out a hand for me to take. I caught more than one of the male One Gov hooahs staring at me before they resumed their perimeter sweep, or whatever it was they did. Yeah, that’s right—I may not have had an MH Factor, but I could rock an amazing dress.