Better vs. Worse

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Better vs. Worse Page 21

by Mary E Thompson


  Chapter Twenty-Three

  I drove up to Puako with the photo albums on my front seat the next afternoon. It was a great day, like most days in Hawaii. I drove with the windows down and felt awesome.

  As long as I didn’t think about the hole gnawing through my gut.

  I thought about calling Ada a couple times and telling her I gave her the wrong impression about Ginny and me, but it wouldn’t change anything so I pushed the thought aside. I was looking for excuses to talk to her, some way to keep in touch with her. I had to find a way to let her go or I’d lose my mind completely.

  Hell, I was likely to lose it anyway.

  I found a beach just south of Puako and parked on the side of the road. I kicked off my shoes and walked around, letting the sand and the surf soak through me.

  Ginny stopped by and picked up her board that morning and loved it. She pushed me again to talk to Ada, but I told her it wasn’t going to happen and she dropped the subject. I showed her the two boards I was making for Anderson, and she was jealous. She was a huge fan of his and loved the idea of being the only two out there using my boards.

  I was anxious to make myself a new board, but it was going to have to wait until I finished the boards for Anderson. I couldn’t take the time away from something that was going to make me money.

  A few minutes before I needed to meet Lane, I plugged the address she gave me into my phone and headed that way. I pulled up in front of a small restaurant that boasted of fresh seafood. The boat out back made me think it was accurate.

  Inside was decorated like a ship with fishing nets all over the walls, buoys hanging from the nets, and one of those singing fish on the wall just inside the door. Thing scared the shit out of me. Pictures lined the walls where there wasn’t a net, showing the history of the place, including the people who looked like the original owners.

  “Welcome to Ship’s Ahoy. How many?”

  “I think there’s going to be two of us, but I’m not sure if the other person is here yet.”

  “Are you meeting Lane?” the hostess asked with a broad grin.

  I nodded. “I am. Do you know her?”

  “I do. We all know Lane. They come here a lot.” She walked as she talked. “Lane and Brian were so excited when they found out about you. It’s really sweet what you did for them.” She gestured to the table toward the back where a young couple sat looking out over the water.

  “Thank you.”

  “Enjoy your meal.”

  I nodded and walked the rest of the way to the table. “Lane?”

  “Kapena? It’s so nice to meet you.” She stood and shook my hand. “Thank you for driving all the way up here.”

  She was tiny, barely up to my chest. She reminded me of Ada in that way, but this woman was very thin where Ada was full of curves. Lane’s almond eyes and straight dark hair were a nod to her Asian heritage, but her look was pure Hawaiian with the bright flowered dress she wore, her flip-flops, and the shell necklace strung around her throat.

  “It was no problem,” I assured her.

  “This is my husband, Brian. I hope it’s okay that he came.”

  “Of course,” I said, shaking his hand. “I imagine you’re just as interested in the pictures. And you don’t know me. I’d never let my sister go meet a stranger on her own. I can’t imagine your husband would be any different.”

  Brian nodded but stayed silent. He was a tall guy, with dark hair and eyes that told stories of loss that only someone else who’d been there would understand. I could tell he was the strong, silent type to balance Lane’s excited side.

  I handed over the albums as I sat. Lane ran her hand down the cover of the one I found on the beach. The red leather was well worn and faded in spots. The salt water wasn’t good for the leather and I figured did more damage, but Lane wasn’t deterred by it at all. She smiled before she even opened the book.

  “This was my mom’s. She lived with us for a few years before she died. I boxed her stuff up last summer and stored it in the workshop we have behind our house. It’s climate controlled, but I never thought about a tsunami. A few boxes washed away, but we didn’t know which ones or what was in them.”

  “I’m sorry. It was a bad storm. I don’t think anyone was prepared for it.”

  Lane shook her head. “It could have been much worse than it was. I saw some of the beaches down your way. I can’t even imagine how bad it was for some people.”

  I nodded. The devastation of the beach was heartbreaking to me, but we were able to clean it up instead of having to tear it down. Hawaii was lucky.

  “I live on the beach. My house had water, but it receded by the next day. I was lucky.”

  “So were we. You found this. It means so much.”

  Lane finally opened the book, flipping pages slowly. Some of them were stuck together, like Sawyer said. Others flipped easily. Lane teared up with each page.

  We ordered drinks and dinner as Lane flipped through the book. She commented on a few of the pictures, but not all of them. She paused over a picture of three people, two men and a woman.

  “My mom was dating my uncle when my parents met. She was working in a coffee shop and my uncle went in there every day. He asked her out on a date. She said she liked him, but there was always something that was missing. She knew she was supposed to be with him for some reason, but she knew it wouldn’t last.” She glanced up at me. “My mom was a big believer in signs.”

  I laughed with her. “My mom was the same way. She always told me to follow my heart, that it would lead me where I needed to go.”

  “Mine said something similar.”

  “How did she end up with your dad?” I asked.

  “My uncle invited her to meet his family. They’d been dating a few months, and my grandmother said it was time for them to meet the woman he’d been spending so much time with. My dad was a year older than my uncle, but he was in the military at the time. He’d come home for leave the day before and was debating re-upping for another four years.”

  Lane smiled at Brian, who clearly knew the story well. They shared a grin that shot straight through my heart. I wanted someone like that. Someone who knew everything about me, all the stories of my past. All the stories of my future, too.

  “When my mom got there, she had a weird feeling that her life was about to change. She didn’t know if it was a good feeling or a bad one, but she knew going to dinner that night was significant. She dressed up in her favorite red dress, and she baked her mother’s cookies. When she arrived and knocked on the door, my dad was the one who answered it.”

  The waitress delivered our food. My stomach rumbled with excitement at the massive amount of delicious smelling food in front of me. My mouth watered. I loved to cook, but this was high quality food, and definitely worth the trip to Puako.

  “My mom said as soon as she saw my dad, she knew he was the man she was supposed to marry. By the time dinner was over, she’d broken up with my uncle and kissed my dad. They never looked back.”

  “Wow,” I breathed. “That’s…that’s really awesome. Except for your uncle.”

  Lane and Brian both laughed.

  “Yeah,” Lane said, “it took them a while to rebuild the relationship with my uncle, but they introduced him to my aunt. He forgave them once he met her and realized he was more suited to my aunt.”

  “So it all ends happily,” I said.

  Lane nodded. The sad smile on her lips told me the rest of the story. That her parents loved each other and her. That they had a happy life. They were the kind of parents I thought I had when I was young. The kind of people everyone wants to have as their parents. The parents that danced in the kitchen when they thought no one was around. That kissed whenever one of them left. That said I love you constantly. The ones who filled the lives of everyone around them with their love, a love no one ever forgot.

  “I’m happy I could bring these pictures back to you. They’re definitely special.”

  “They are
. It’s the only way we can show our child who his or her grandparents were.”

  My eyebrows shot up right alongside Brian’s.

  “I didn’t think we were going to tell anyone,” Brian said softly.

  Lane smiled at me. “He’s practically family. And something tells me he needs to know that everything works out.”

  I laughed to cover up the tightness in my chest. It would be nice to know things would work out, but even better would be if I thought it would work out for me. I knew that wasn’t ever going to happen.

  “Well, my friend, like I mentioned, is a photographer. He reprinted some of the photos. The ones he could. Some were too damaged, but he wanted to try to help. The other album is all the new copies, plus a stick with the digital files in case you ever want to make more copies.”

  “Wow,” Lane breathed, opening the album Sawyer put together. She flipped through those pictures much more quickly, smiling at the restored images that clearly showed her parents. “I can’t believe you did all this for us. It means so much.” Lane’s eyes filled with tears, and her lip quivered.

  “It wasn’t a big deal. I would hope someone would do the same for my family. Memories fade, but the pictures of our past can bring them back. I’m happy to give this back to you.”

  We finished dinner and talked about Lane’s pregnancy. It was still very early, but Lane had a feeling she was pregnant with a daughter. Brian was protective of his wife, for good reason. She’d already lost two babies, so they were on edge for this one, but Lane said she thought it was going to be okay this time around.

  When we walked outside, Lane asked me to keep in touch. We promised we would. I asked if I could share their story with Sawyer and snapped a quick picture of Lane, Brian, and the albums. Sawyer would love it.

  Instead of going home, I headed for Opposites Attract. I was feeling good and wanted to tell Sawyer about Lane and Brian and thank him for his help getting the album back to them.

  Sawyer was in his office when I walked in and took a seat. He glanced up and said hey, but stayed focused on his work for a few minutes. It was how Sawyer worked. When he was editing, he didn’t stop until he was done.

  When he finished, he looked at me and smiled. “What brings you here?”

  “I met the owners of the photo album.”

  Sawyer’s grin widened and his eyebrows spiked. “Really? That’s awesome. I didn’t know you found them.”

  “They called me yesterday. Really nice couple.”

  “The couple in the pictures?”

  I shook my head. “Nope. Their daughter. Told me all about her parents. They sound like they were pretty great people.”

  “Were?”

  I nodded. “Died a few years ago. But they were happy. She didn’t realize the album was gone until a friend called and said she saw a picture that looked like her parents on the board in the coffee shop. She was thrilled to get the pics back.”

  “Well, good. It was pretty awesome of you to hold on to it and find them.”

  “I wanted to thank you. You did all the work.”

  Sawyer shook his head. “I like that kind of thing. I just wish I’d been able to get all the pictures restored.”

  “Yeah, I told her that. She said the whole thing would have been lost without us so she was happy with what you were able to do. She’s pregnant.”

  “The woman?”

  I nodded, smiling. “Her husband wasn’t happy she told me, but they’re really excited. Early.”

  “That’s rough. A few of my friends from Winterville are pregnant. It’s tough to keep it quiet, but it’s hard to lose one.”

  My eyebrows jumped up. “You’re not speaking from experience are you?”

  Sawyer shook his head and laughed. “Nope. Not at all.”

  “Let’s keep it that way.”

  Sawyer snorted. “You know we’re going to have kids one day.”

  “It better be after you marry her.”

  Sawyer grinned but didn’t answer. I didn’t like that look.

  “Hey Sawyer, do you have— Oh, sorry,” Micah said, stopping at the door. “I didn’t realize you were here.”

  I snorted and shook my head. He was the last person I wanted to see.

  “It’s okay, Micah. What’s up?” Sawyer said, beckoning him in.

  “Uh, well, Kiana isn’t here, so I thought you could help me out. I need to get an order in for food for the wedding on Thursday. Can you approve it?”

  “I didn’t realize you needed someone to approve your orders,” Sawyer said, taking the tablet from Micah to look over the purchase.

  “He should. He’s only been here a minute. Kiki’s smart to have him on a leash,” I said.

  Sawyer looked back and forth between us, and Micah just stood there shooting daggers at me.

  “I know you’re Kiana’s brother, but that doesn’t mean you can treat me like shit. I do my job. And I report to Kiana, not you.”

  “Yeah, well from what I see, you do whatever you want without regard for anyone around you,” I spat.

  “What the hell are you talking about?” Micah asked, moving closer to me.

  “What is wrong with you two?” Kiki said from the doorway. “I could hear you yelling from outside.”

  “I’m just making sure Ada’s new plaything knows the score,” I said, my eyes locked on him.

  Micah blanched, his eyebrows pulling together and his eyes drifting. “What are you talking about?”

  “Don’t play dumb with me. I know the two of you are together. Everyone does. I was just the fool she was sleeping with while the two of you were figuring it all out. Don’t worry, though. I ended it with her so you can have her all to yourself. I was never very good at sharing.”

  The room was silent. Sawyer and Kiki were waiting for Micah to say something. Micah just stood there. Guess he didn’t know Ada and I were sleeping together.

  “Ada and I aren’t together. Never have been. She’s like a sister to me. I met her through my last job, but there’s never been anything more than a friendship between us.”

  I shook my head. “No. I heard you two talking the other night. You said she should just admit she loves you and the two of you can be together. You were laughing about it.”

  Micah snickered. “Yeah, it’s a joke we have. How easy life would be if we could fall for each other since we get along really well, but it would be like kissing my sister. Ada’s amazing, but she not someone I’d ever want to be with.”

  My head spun as I tried to understand what the hell was going on. If they weren’t together, then I fucked up.

  “I know you don’t want to hear this, but Ada’s in love with you, Kapena.”

  Hope flooded me, overwhelming everything in my body. “Why wouldn’t I want to hear that?”

  Micah shrugged. “Because you don’t see her that way. I know she’s your sister’s best friend and you don’t think of her as a beautiful, sexy woman, but she thinks of you as the man she measures every other guy against.”

  “No,” I mumbled.

  “She’d kill me if she knew I told you this, but I’ve been trying to talk her into telling you for weeks. She told me when you two got together. She was so happy. When you overheard us talking before the wedding, she was upset because she was falling harder for you, but you only wanted sex from her.”

  “I didn’t. She was the one who showed up, had sex, and left. I invited her to stay. I asked her to let me cook for her. I tried. She snuck in after dark and left as soon as she was done. She was the one who treated what we had like it meant nothing.”

  Micah shrugged. “Defense mechanism. She didn’t want to date you and sleep with you. She knew she wouldn’t be able to survive it. She was really upset the other night. You really hurt her.”

  Fear slid into me, grabbing hold of my throat and squeezing until I struggled to get air in. I hurt Ada. Intentionally. I did it because I was hurt, but I was an idiot. I misread everything and she loved me. She wanted me. What the hell wa
s wrong with me?

  “I need to find her. I have to tell her.”

  “Kapena,” Micah said as I rushed for the door.

  “What?”

  “Start with I love you. She needs to hear that. She won’t believe you, though. Keep telling her until she listens.”

  I stopped and went back into the room. I extended my hand to Micah and waited a beat for him to shake it.

  “Thank you, Micah. I owe you for this.”

  Micah grinned. “I plan to collect.”

  I waved as I ran out the door. I had to find her.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  I raced away from Opposites Attract and headed straight for Ada’s apartment. I hadn’t been there since she moved in, but I knew exactly where it was. The fact that I didn’t go to that area was intentional, although I hoped to change that.

  I swerved around a car leaving and pulled up in front of her building. I didn’t see her car, but I wasn’t going to take the chance she was home so I ran to her door and pounded on it.

  Hope slipped away the longer I knocked on her door with no answer.

  I checked her favorite restaurant next. Her favorite coffee shop. Her favorite bar. I swung by her parents’ house and Alvin’s, but no one was home at either.

  It was getting late so I went back to Ada’s apartment hoping I could catch her there. When I pulled in, I saw her car parked near her building. I breathed a sigh of relief that I found her. Finally.

  I parked right next to her and checked myself out in the mirror. It was pointless, but I wanted to look good for her. I was still wearing the clothes I had on when I went to dinner. My hair was tied back. It wasn’t perfect, but it was me.

  I knocked on her door and waited for her to open it.

  Her eyes were huge when she saw me standing there. She closed the door partway to block my view of the rest of the apartment. And my entry.

  “Can I come in?”

  “What do you want, Kapena?”

  “I learned a few things today. I wondered if I could talk to you about them.”

  She crossed her arms over her chest. I waited, praying she’d say yes. If she didn’t let me in, I didn’t know what I was going to do.

 

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