“I’m feeling optimistic.”
“Jimmy, it’s okay if we can’t. You know that.”
I shake my head. “No, it’s not. It’s been a month and I’m much better. Even Xander says so. He better have a damn good reason why I can’t have sex with my wife or I’m going to freak the fuck out on him.”
“Don’t be so dramatic.”
“I’m horny.”
“You’re insatiable. You know, I’ve bragged to Josie and Katelyn about that before.”
I cringe. Us guys don’t do the kiss ‘n’ tell thing. I don’t want to know about what they do with their women. “You talk about me to Josie and Katelyn?”
She nods as her hand grabs my waist. “I tell them everything like that little trick you do with your tongue. Or how you like to –”
I put my hand over her mouth to shut her up. I can’t listen to this, not right now. I step forward and grind into her. “If the doctor says yes, I’m shagging you in the car. No foreplay, no dipping my fingers for a taste of your sweet pussy. I’m going to drive us to a deserted road and fuck you senseless,” I whisper in her ear.
“Jimmy,” her voice is quiet, wanting. I don’t care what she says. She wants it. She wants me buried deep inside of her to ease the ache. That’s one very important factor in our relationship. We turn each other on and are both willing to give in to each other, and I plan to take full advantage.
“HI Jimmy, how are you feeling?” the doctor walks in and speaks without looking at me. His face is glued to his tablet. I know this office is using tablets for their charts, but for the love of God, make eye contact with me so you can see how well I’m doing.
“I’m good.”
He sits down and types. Jenna sits in the corner, reading a magazine. I find myself wishing it was Playboy or something to get her in the mood. I wasn’t kidding when I told her my plans. Today, foreplay is overrated. I have time to make up for it. Besides, the moment I touch her, I’m going to blow my load.
“Mr. Knight says everything’s looking good. Your oxygen level is about ninety percent. I still want to see it higher, but as long as you don’t over exert yourself I don’t see a need to carry the tank around anymore. I still want you to sleep with it though until your level increases.”
“Can I have sex?”
“Jimmy!” Jenna screeches.
The doctor starts laughing. “Yes, Jimmy, you’re clear to have sex as long as your tank is near in the event you start to hyperventilate, which I think might happen.”
“No kidding,” I say. “Are we done here?”
“Yes, Jimmy. We’ll see you in two weeks. Have fun you two,” he says, winking at me before leaving the room.
I wait for the door to shut before turning my attention to Jenna. She’s trying to ignore me, but it won’t work.
“Did you hear him?”
“Yes, he says you need an appointment in two weeks.”
“Jenna,” I whine.
“Jimmy,” she says as she stands up and walks over to me. “I’ll be waiting in the car.”
Before I can react she’s out of the door and I’m left with a raging hard on and a visit to the receptionist to get another appointment.
WHEN I get into the car I don’t say anything. I slide, for the first time in months, into the driver’s seat. Jenna’s looks out the window. There’s a smile on her face. Yeah, she knows what’s coming. I start the car and adjust the volume on the radio. Lyrics waft through the speakers easing the tension that I’m feeling. I haven’t had this feeling since I was a teenager.
My palms sweat against the steering wheel. I’m trying my hardest not to look over at Jenna until I get to our destination. It’s fucking tough though. I want to touch her now. I want to hold her hand, but I’m afraid that if I let go I’ll swerve off the road.
Why am I nervous? It’s something I can’t figure out. It’s not like we haven’t been together before. Looking at her belly is evidence enough. But it’s been months since we’ve been together and I’ve been out of commission.
I turn down a deserted road and drive into the woods. I’ve driven out here a few times to clear my head and try to find the courage to ask Jenna out. Thing is, I didn’t need courage, I just needed knowledge and it was Liam who supplied that to me one night in the studio. I park the car and turn off the engine. I plug my phone into the aux port and pick one of the many playlists I have for Jenna.
“How are we going to do this?”
I look at my wife whose eyes are wandering. “I think we’ve mastered the art of having sex, Sweet Lips.”
Jenna shakes her head. “I’m big, Jimmy. It’s not like I can lie down.”
I wish she’d listen to me when I tell her that I think she’s beautiful. That she’s the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen. I get out of the car and walk to her side, opening the door and holding out my hand for her. She tries to walk away from me, but I stop her. I spin her around and pin her against the car.
I bury my nose in her hair as my hands move up her sides. My fingers dance under her shirt, inching their way to her full tits.
“I don’t think you’re fat. I think you’re sexy as fuck and my dick wants to be buried in you.”
Jenna throws her head back when my fingers squeeze her nipples. I latch onto her neck, biting her gently. My cock aches, begging for release. I know I won’t last. I’m not expecting much. Pulling my hands away from her chest, I find the waistband of her shorts and slide them down her leg, taking her knickers with them.
“Step out,” I request. She steps out of her shorts, never turning to look at me. I place them on the hood of the car. I drop my shorts, and my cock springs against the swell of her arse. She moans when I touch her confirming what I already know – she wants this.
My leg pushes against hers, widening her stance.
“Put your foot on the tyre.” Never have I been so thankful for her small car. I’m going to buy her a new one before the baby is born but we might need to keep this one for some little excursions.
She does as I ask, allowing me plenty of space to step forward. I exhale loudly the second my dick comes in contact with her. She bends, arching her back. Begging me to fill her. I meet her request with no hesitation.
I grip her hips, steadying her. I move in and out, slowly. I need to last. I need to experience this as if it was our first time. With each thrust, she gets louder. My name falls from her lips in the most sensual way. It spurs me to increase my speed and as much as I want to prolong it, I can’t.
I slam into her as my hand snakes under her shirt. I pull down her bra and palm her breast. She pushes into me, rocking her hips. I’m so close, but I want her with me. I want to feel her clench as I pump into her. My fingers rub on her swollen clit. It’s hard and ready to explode.
“Oh fuck, Jenna. Oh fuck, fuck fuck,” I say with each thrust.
“I… I’m…”
“Fuck Sweet Lips I can feel you coming.”
Jenna moans loudly. Her head is resting against the car. I bite down on her shoulder the moment I feel my body tense. I pump into her faster, pounding my hips into hers.
My head rests against her back, my breathing laboured, but not out of control. “Fuck, Jenna I needed that. God, I’ve missed you so much.”
I’ve never craved sex the way I have these past few months. I guess what they say is true. Once you find your one, you know.
I sit up, moving as little as possible so not to disturb Jimmy. He still needs to sleep and heal. I’m ecstatic that his road to recovery is almost complete. Watching him with Xander yesterday filled me with such pride. To see him working so hard to achieve his goal is beyond rewarding. He knows the guilt I carry and is determined to prove to me that he’s fine.
I’m sore right now and with each movement the ache intensifies. I know I’m supposed to love this feeling after spending the night with my husband, but right now I just want to roll into the fetal position and lie on the bathroom floor.
The cold hardwo
od floor makes me feel a little better. I must be coming down with the flu. I rest my hand against my forehead. I’m warmer than usual. I don’t know how I’ll handle being sick and this pregnant. I’m almost unbearable now. A cold on top of this will just make me a raging bitch. Each step I take down the stairs hurts.
“Morning, darling,” Brigette says over her cup of coffee. She went back to London briefly before coming to Beaumont. She’s going to help with the baby when she gets here. I think it’s important for her and Little One to bond, especially since she lives so far away. I asked Jimmy if he thinks his mom will move here and he said no because it was too close to his dad even though his dad is in Los Angeles… playing house with Jimmy’s ex.
“Morning,” I say, leaning up against the kitchen counter. I look out into the backyard and smile. Nick, bless his heart, built Little One a playhouse to match our house. Our house. I still can’t get over saying that. It has everything I never knew I wanted. It’s a two-story colonial with a big fenced-in yard and the necessary privacy we need. As soon as I saw the dark slate blue paint and white shutters I was in love. I didn’t care what the inside looked like because just standing outside, I had my dream home.
“Are you okay?” Brigette asks, coming to stand next to me. I shake my head and lean down to rest my head on the counter.
“Everything aches and I think I have a fever.”
“Let me check.” I allow this because she’s become my second mom even though we’ve just met. I’d give anything to have my mom here and she will be soon, but right now I’m happy that Brigette is with us. “You do feel a little warm. Why don’t you go and lie down?”
“Jimmy’s sleeping and I don’t want to disturb him.”
“The sofa will suffice.” She starts to guide me to the couch, but my stomach isn’t having any of it. I cover my mouth and run off to the bathroom. Brigette follows and holds my hair back as I expel last night’s dinner into the porcelain God.
I heave again and feel a warm trickle run down my legs. “Shit I just pissed myself,” I say through tears. Today is not going to be a great day for me.
“Does your back hurt?”
I nod. “Everything hurts.”
Brigette helps me stand and offers me a washcloth and a glass of water. “Honey, you’re in labour. Sit down and I’ll go and wake up Jimmy and get you a change of clothes.”
“It’s not time.”
“Apparently Little One says it is. You’ll be fine. Now sit, I’ll be right back.”
I do as she says, except the moment I touch the seat a warm geyser rushes out between my legs soaking the floor mat along with my yoga pants.
“Jimmy,” I scream for him. I can hear him coming down the stairs too fast. I close my eyes when I hear a loud thunk followed by a string of curse words. I stand only to be met with an excruciating pain across my stomach. “Oh holy shit,” I say as I bend over.
“Jenna,” he says as he comes running into the bathroom. “Did you piss yourself, Sweet Lips?”
I roll my eyes and am about to give him a dirty look when I see how red and swollen his eye is. “Jimmy, your eye?”
“What’s wrong with it?” He stands in front of the mirror and fixes his hair. “Oh yeah, it looks like I’ll have a nice shiner.” He leans forward, examining himself.
“Jimmy,” I whine as another contraction rolls over me.
He turns and looks at me. “Oh shit, I forgot.”
Great!
He pulls me into his arms. I lean on him, hobbling like I’ve broken every bone in my body. “Let’s get you to the hospital.”
“I need to change first.”
“Jenna, don’t be vain, you’re fine. Besides they’ll give you a gown.”
“I’m not being… ahhhhhh, holy fuck.” I lean against the wall and work on my breathing technique.
“What the hell, Jenna?”
“Oh God, Jimmy, I’m in freaking labor. Where’s your mom?”
“Right here, darling. Come on let’s go and get you changed. Jimmy, by the door is Jenna’s hospital bag. Take it to the car and bring the car around so we can leave.”
“Um…”
“Now, Jimmy, or Jenna will be delivering Little One on your floor.”
“Okay, mum, but you’ll stay with Jenna?”
“Yes, now go.”
The back and forth with them is dizzying. I lean on Brigette for support as she walks me back to the bathroom. She leans me against the counter while she picks up the soaked floor mat.
“I’ll take care of that later. Now let’s get you changed.”
That awkward moment when your mother-in-law is seeing your lady bits and you don’t care. I don’t even care that she’s running a warm wash cloth up my legs. I want to be clean before having this baby.
“Thank you.”
“For what, darling?”
“For being here and accepting me.”
Brigette stands before me. “You make my son happy. That’s something I haven’t seen in a very long time. I should be the one thanking you.”
I try to smile in return, but another contraction washes over me. This one is harder and longer. “I think we should go.”
“I agree.” Brigette washes up before dressing me quickly. She holds my arm as we walk to the door. Jimmy’s pacing in the yard with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth.
“Jimmy!” The both of us yell. He looks at us, shocked.
“What the hell are you doing?”
“Waiting for you,” he exclaims.
“Why are you smoking?” I demand.
He pulls it away from his lips and looks at it. “It’s not lit, innit?”
I brow beat him until he sets it down. “You’re going to kill yourself.”
“I wasn’t going to light it. Come on, Sweet Lips, let’s go have a baby.” Instead of walking to the car, Jimmy picks me up and carries me. He shouldn’t be doing this, but I feel so much better being in his arms. He sets me in the car and even puts on my seatbelt. Brigette climbs in the back as Jimmy gets behind the wheel.
“I need to call my mom.”
“Already taken care of, I called her when I was getting your clothes. She’ll be on the next flight out,” Brigette says. She starts rubbing my shoulders, easing away some of the tension building. I close my eyes and try to relax and breathe through my contractions.
“We’re here,” Jimmy says, slamming the car into park.
“Take her in Jimmy and I’ll park the car.”
Before I know what’s happening my door is open and I’m in his arms. “Put me down, you’re going to hurt yourself.”
“Bollocks, I don’t want the baby to fall out.”
Only my husband would think that.
“Hi Mrs. Davis, ready to have your baby, I see.”
“Yep, she’s like a burst pipe, she’s leaking so much,” Jimmy blurts out.
“That’s normal. Follow me.”
Still in Jimmy’s arms, we walk down the hall into a room that is decorated in passion pink. Jimmy groans and I want to bleach my eyes. Who, in their right mind, decorates like this? Do they think all women are the same and just want to stare at pink flowers while pushing out a watermelon?
“This room looks like a bottle of Pepto threw up.”
The nurse looks at me and smiles. Jimmy sets me down on the bed and stares at my feet. “You’re not wearing any shoes.”
I look down, he’s right. “Imagine that. Guess I would’ve known had I walked to the car.”
The nurse laughs. “Put this on and get comfortable. I’ll be back.”
Famous last words.
“OH my God it hurts so much,” I whine to anyone who’ll listen. I’m uncomfortable and tired. I’ve been walking up and down the hall dozens of times. I’ve sat in every position ever created. I’ve rocked on a ball through my contractions and nothing… nothing is making them go away.
“It’s almost over, babe.”
“How the hell do you know, Jimmy? Do you have some
magic spidey sense telling you that the baby is almost here?”
“No, I just thought —”
“Stop thinking.”
“Okay.”
“Okay? Nothing is okay. I’m in pain and your daughter is stretching me as far as the Grand Canyon. How is this okay?”
Jimmy closes his eyes and rests his head next to mine. I want to push him away, but he gives me the coveted ice chips that are like crack. I know he’s holding them hostage and waiting for me to say nice things to him, but that’s not going to happen. I’m angry with him right now.
“I love you, Jimmy.”
“Love you too, Sweet Lips.”
My body tightens as a contraction works its way through my abdomen. “It hurts,” I whine. Tears or maybe just sweat, roll down my face.
“I’m sorry.”
“You should be. It’s your demon sperm that did this to me.”
“Jenna —”
“Don’t Jenna me. I let you stick that thing in me and now look at me.”
“You’re having a baby,” he says as if he’s trying to sweeten me up.
“Babies aren’t this evil.” I try to turn away from him, but he holds onto me. It should piss me off, but it doesn’t.
“I need to go to the bathroom,” I say as the pressure increases.
“I’ll call the doctor.” Jimmy stands but I pull him back to me.
“You can’t leave me,” I cry out.
“I’m not going to, don’t worry.” He reaches over and presses the call button. The door bangs open, causing me to jump.
“How are you feeling, Jenna?” the nurse asks.
“I need to go to the bathroom.”
“Let me have a look.” Say what? The nurse lifts my blanket and puts my feet into the stir-ups. How in the hell is she going to check and see if I have to go to the bathroom? Is there some monitor I’m not aware of? “Looks like we’re ready to start pushing.”
What’s this we shit? Is she pushing too?
The nurse leaves me with my legs wide open on this joke of a bed only to return with the doctor. He sits down and smiles.
Creepy.
“Jimmy, do you remember what they taught you in Lamaze?”
“Yeah, I do.”
Finding My Forever Page 23