“Okay,” I say, wiping tears away with the back of my hand. “I like Eden Davis. It sounds perfect.” Jimmy kisses me, holding my face in his hands.
He leans down and pulls my shirt up over my belly. His lips press into my skin. “Eden Davis. That’s your name, Little One, and we can’t wait to meet you.”
Jimmy moves with caution as he carries Eden over to me. I move aside, still sore, but feeling better. He climbs on the bed, putting Little One on my chest. She stretches her neck and makes the most beautiful sound ever.
“I love that sound,” Jimmy says, echoing my thoughts.
“Me too.” I pull her close and rest my head on his shoulder.
“Let me take a photo.” Jimmy pulls out his phone and holds it out in front of us. I turn Eden around and hold her between us. He presses the button and pulls the phone closer to us so we can see our first family photo.
“She’s perfect.”
“You both are. I can’t even begin to explain how happy I am right now, Jenna.” Jimmy kisses Eden on the forehead before kissing me. “You’ve changed my life and it’s definitely for the better.”
I lean into Jimmy and relish this moment. He has no idea how much he’s changed my life and I don’t know if I’ll ever find the words to tell him.
“Surprise!” My mom and Brigette yell in unison.
“Hi mom,” I say when she steps forward. She comes around to the side of the bed and pulls me into a hug. I refuse to move, not ready to let go of Eden yet.
“I’m so proud of you sweetheart. She’s absolutely gorgeous.”
“Thank you,” my voice breaks. Her approval means so much to me. After everything I’ve been through I know she never thought she’d see this day. But it’s here and she’s a grandma. Mom wipes her tears and steps away, allowing Brigette a moment with us.
“I want both the grandmas to have a photo taken with you and Eden,” Jimmy says as he leaves my side.
“Jimmy, I look like crap,” I whine.
“Nonsense, Jenna. You’re a new mom. There’s nothing more beautiful about that,” my mom says.
“I agree,” Jimmy says as his mom and mine each take a spot next to Eden and me. Each mom places a hand on Eden as I hold her up for Jimmy to take a picture.
“Say “cheese” my favourite ladies.”
I smile big enough that my cheeks hurt. I know how much this picture will mean to Jimmy and to me.
AFTER one night in the hospital I’m ready to go home. My bag is packed thanks to my mom. Eden is dressed, thanks to her dad, and ready to make her public debut. I was worried about the press, but thankfully none of the nurses called anyone so we’ll be able to introduce Eden when we’re ready.
Jimmy, of course, says she’s ready now. I swear we should’ve had a boy. He has her dressed in a 4225 West baby outfit, custom made, and her dark hair is spiked… with a pink ribbon. I gave him props for the ribbon.
I sit down in the wheelchair, holding Eden in her car seat on my lap. Harrison gave Jimmy an hour’s long lesson on how to install the base in the back of the car. Jimmy says he has it mastered. This, I’m going to have to trust him on. The moms have already taken the copious amounts of flowers and gifts we received home. Everyone will be there for Eden’s homecoming and as much as I’d love to sleep, it won’t happen at least for the next few hours.
He wheels us out, saying good-bye to the nursing staff as we pass. I think in the day and half that we’ve been here, he’s charmed each and every one of them. Typical Jimmy.
The sliding glass doors open. I cover my eyes from the penetrating sun. I make sure Eden’s blanket is over her carrier to block the sunlight. The last thing I want is a sick baby so soon. The car is all ready, having been brought around by valet. Valet in a hospital, who knew?
Jimmy takes Eden from me and places her in the backseat. He helps me from the wheelchair and guides me to the back. I told him that I want to be close to her. I want to watch her take her first car ride. I want to be the first person that she sees when she opens her eyes.
He drives away and though I would have expected him to drive like an eighty-year old man, I was sadly mistaken. Jimmy’s Jimmy, and not everything will change overnight.
The trees in front of our house are decorated with pink ribbons and balloons. The cars belonging to our friends line the street. My heart beats with anticipation of Eden making her grand appearance. I can’t imagine all new babies do this, but Eden just isn’t any baby, she’s Jimmy’s and he does things to the tenth degree.
Jimmy pulls into our driveway and shuts off the car. He runs around the front to the backdoor, pulling it open. He helps me out before leaning in and unhooking Eden’s car seat. He holds the carrier in one hand and my hand in his other. I kick the car door closed with my foot and smile at my family as we walk toward our party.
“Well, isn’t this special.”
My blood turns cold at the sound of Damien’s voice. I don’t dare turn around and face him because if I do, he’ll be real. I eye Jimmy and Eden and the backyard wondering how they can escape. Damien wants me, not them.
“Turn around, Jenna.”
I close my eyes and let the tears fall. My life is over. I’ll never see her first birthday. I’ll never see her dress for prom or watch her walk across the stage for graduation. I won’t be there when she has her first boyfriend and her first heartbreak. I squeeze Jimmy’s hand tightly.
“Don’t,” he says, quietly.
“I have to.” I turn slowly and face the man who made it possible for me to stand here today. Yes, he was my husband, but he took his vows to the extreme and beat me. If he hadn’t done that, I wouldn’t be here right now.
“Is that your baby? Humph, at least you’re not as fat now.”
I wish I could say no, but it’s obvious. I still have a pouch and my daughter is being held by her father right now.
“You know I thought I killed that man you’ve been allowing to violate your body, but I guess I didn’t do a good enough job.”
I face Damien, waiting for him to deliver my punishment.
“What do you want, Damien?”
“You. I told you that I wanted you back, but you didn’t believe me. You went and married this piece of shit and allowed him to do things to you. Things that you said you’d only do with me. You let him taint your body and now you’ve bore him a bastard.”
I close my eyes and pray for help to arrive. He’s going to hurt my family, not me. He’s going to take away Jimmy and Eden, leaving me broken and empty.
“Say good-bye, Jenna.”
“You’re not taking her anywhere,” Jimmy yells. I hope his voice carries loud enough into the house. We need help.
“She’ll come willingly. I won’t have to force her,” Damien says calmly.
“Jenna doesn’t love you.”
“Of course she does. Don’t you, Jenna?”
I don’t answer, he knows. He knows I don’t love him. If I did, I would’ve stayed and taken the beatings.
“DON’T YOU?” he pulls out his gun and points it at Jimmy. He marches closer, just a few feet from us. Eden starts to cry, but we can’t do anything to help her.
“Damien, please stop.” I let go of Jimmy’s hand and step in front of him. He stops me. “Just stop. I’ll come with you, but you have to let them go in the house. The baby, she needs to eat and you don’t want her to starve.”
“I don’t care about that bastard child. Put her on the ground.”
“NO!” Jimmy yells.
“PUT HER THE FUCK DOWN BEFORE I SHOOT HER!”
“NO!” I scream and step in front of Eden as Damien points his gun at her. The gun fires and all time stops.
I sit on the floor, playing with Eden. Her hair is an odd color, but it’s completely unique to her personality. It’s still dark, but with natural red highlights. It’s definitely a combination of Jenna and me. I still like to put it in a Mohawk with a bow, just for a bit of fun. It drives Jenna nuts, but she never changes it. Lit
tle One is rolling over now. She thinks it’s fun, until she gets stuck and can’t get back to where she was. She screams. I say she’s saying daddy, but Jenna assures me she’s just making noises to get my attention. The minute her little yelp is out of her mouth, I’m always there to help her. Eden knows that I’ll never leave her.
It’s been two months since the shooting that changed our lives. I felt guilty first, but now there’s a sense of relief knowing that Jenna’s ex won’t be able to harm my family ever again. When the gun went off I didn’t know what to do. I froze and so did Jenna. I was afraid to put Eden down, but I had to find out where Jenna had been hit. When she looked at me with tears in her eyes, I thought for sure that I had lost her. But the telltale sound of someone hitting their head hard caught our attention. Everything was in slow motion as we turned and saw Paul Baker standing in front of us with his gun pointed at where Damien was standing.
That day my eyes moved so slowly until they landed upon Damien on the ground, eyes closed and blood dripping from his mouth. I knew instantly that he was dead. What I didn’t know was how Jenna was going to react. He was her first love and people don’t forget that.
The back door opens. The sound of keys being thrown onto the kitchen-top echo through the house, it’s a bad sign.
“Mummy’s home,” I say to Eden whose legs shake wildly. She loves her mum and gets most of her attention these days, but I’m okay with it. Eden’s hard to compete with, but I guess that’s what happens when you have a baby. Jenna dotes on her, and so do I.
“Hi, wifey,” I say loud enough for her to hear me.
“Hi.” I look up at the sound of her voice. She’s leaning against the doorframe and has a piece of paper hanging from her fingers.
“What’s that?” I nod to the paper.
She holds it up, as if she’s going to read it. “A letter from Damien’s parents.”
I sit up suddenly and put Eden in her vibrating chair and place her tiny fingers around her favourite monkey to keep her occupied. I stand up, walk over to Jenna and pull her into my arms.
“Do you want to me to read it?”
She shakes her head. “I thought we could read it together. Anything they have to say they need to stay to the both of us.”
“Okay.” I lead her over to the sofa. I sit down first, and pull her onto my lap. I rest my head on her shoulder and wait. Jenna clears her throat, but before she can start Eden lets it known that she’s missing out on cuddle time.
Jenna gets up and takes her out of her seat. She hands Eden to me and thankfully resumes her spot on my lap. This is another moment that I want to capture, sans the letter that has my wife so upset, so I can remember it forever.
“Dearest Jenna,
When Damien brought you home for the first time we knew that he had met his destruction, we just didn’t realize we’d lose our son in the process. The way Damien looked at you, the way he spoke about you and the way he moved around you, you owned his heart. We were so happy when you married and couldn’t wait for you to start a family.
It broke our heart when he confessed that he had hit you and continued to do so because it gave him a release that he couldn’t explain. We offered to get him help, but he wouldn’t admit that what he was doing was wrong. He said that you’d forgiven him after each episode only for him to find that he needed to do it again to keep you close to him.
We don’t know where he learned to be abusive, but it wasn’t in our home when we raised him. Society? Friends? We’ll never know. What we do know is that when you left him, you took his heart with you. He looked in every possible place until he saw a woman that looked just like you. He said he needed to go and find you, to bring you home.
Damien told us that your first meeting didn’t go as planned, but that he was going to make you fall in love with him again. We’re just sorry that he’ll never have the opportunity to love again, unlike you.
I hope this letter finds you well and that you’re moving on. We’re trying, but being a mother now, you know parents should never have to bury their children. But we have and we must live with the knowledge that we could’ve prevented all of this from happening.
“They didn’t sign it. I guess that’s their way of not getting closure or something.” Jenna leans her head on my shoulder. Her fingers play with Eden’s. “I don’t even know why they wrote me. The tone… they’re blaming me.”
“You know it’s not your fault, right?”
“I know.”
“People like that can’t accept the responsibility that they failed as parents. He hit you, shot me with intent to kill and was going to shoot our daughter. I’m happy Paul was invited to Eden’s homecoming because if he hadn’t been there at that moment… I don’t even want to think about it.”
Jenna folds the letter and puts it on the cushion. I’m going to shred that stupid piece of crappy paper the minute I get up from holding my girls, but until then I’m going to keep them in my arms, grateful that I have them.
I almost lost them, too many times to mention. When I look at Jenna and Eden, I see my forever. She’s the one I’m going to grow old with. She’s the one who is going to laugh at me when my Mohawk won’t stand up any longer or when Eden brings home a rock star boyfriend. Jenna’s the one that is going to be by my side when I walk my daughter down the aisle and we’ll be together when we become grandparents. We’ll have matching rocking chairs on our front porch and we’ll sip tea — even though I hate it — out of silly little teacups with our little fingers in the air because that will make her laugh.
Who knew that finding my forever would be so easy? I just needed my best mate to get married so I could hook-up with the bridesmaid. That’s me in a nutshell, innit?
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First and foremost: I have to thank the fans because without you The Beaumont Series isn’t possible. Your continued support and encouragement means the world to me.
And to Yvette: who once again has slaved tirelessly over my rambling to make it sound nice and pretty. You brought Jimmy to life and for that I can never thank you enough.
Jodie: words can’t express how much you mean to me. You put up with so much for so little in return. I can’t thank you enough for being my right hand. And to Big D, Sierra and Chey, thank you for allowing your mom to delve into my world, often dropping things just to take care of what I need. You have a pretty amazing wife and mother, but she has a pretty fantastic family.
Now to my AMAZING Street Team: I gave you an impossible challenge when I handed you Finding My Forever and you all nailed it, each and every one of you. You’re more than a street team; you’re best friends, family, sounding boards and confidants. I can’t imagine not having you part of not only this series, but others as well. Everything you tell me I take to heart. So I thank you, Georgette, Jaime, Emily, Jennifer, Laura, Holly, Jen and Joli.
Sarah & Emily: I thank you for once again bringin
g my stories to life. Sarah, when you sent me the cover Finding My Forever, I yelled YES, loudly! I love staring at this cover. Emily, your vision and talent for making the insides look all pretty is amazing. Thank you both.
Ellie at Love N. Books: how do I begin to thank you? I probably can’t in all honesty. You pushed me to make a decision that I’ll forever be in debt to you for. You probably don’t hear this enough, but you were right – haha! Any author who gets to work with you in the future should consider themselves lucky. Without your constant “trust me” my cover wouldn’t be as fabulous as it is.
Brandyn Farrell: thank you for putting a “face” to Jimmy. To say you fit him perfectly is an understatement. The only thing missing is a British accent. Can you master that before a signing?
Denise: You’ve grown into such a good friend. I know I can count on you to be blunt and matter of fact.
Can’t wait for the world to see what’s up your sleeve.
Eric Heatherly: How you can supply the perfect song is beyond me, but I love it. Thank you for being on this journey with me and providing my guys with the music that they needed to complete their stories.
Indie Inked: You’re friendship and support is unwavering for that I thank you.
To my family: Thank you for your continued support. Thank you for encouraging my crazy ideas and for helping create new ones.
To my girls: You’re both so creative and your imaginations are wild. I can’t wait to see what you do. You both have your own amazing stories ready to be written and I can’t wait to help guide you through the process.
Heidi is the author of USA Today, Kobo, Digital Book World, Amazon and Barnes & Noble Bestselling novel, Forever My Girl
Originally from the Pacific Northwest, she now lives in picturesque Vermont, with her husband and two daughters. Also renting space in their home is an over-hyper Beagle/Jack Russell and two Parakeets.
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