Too Far Gone

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Too Far Gone Page 20

by HelenKay Dimon


  Walker tried to keep the rest inside. To hold back and think it through without dumping it on anyone or letting them in further, but . . . “I don’t even know what I did.”

  “You may never know,” Tom said as he leaned over the edge of the roof, joining in the conversation.

  All three men nodded.

  It looked as if they accepted that as a reasonable answer. Walker sure didn’t. “That’s ridiculous.”

  Callen tugged on Walker’s arm and glanced around before dropping to a whisper. “Keep your voice down.”

  “Are you two afraid of your women?” Walker meant it more as a real question than an accusation.

  He knew from experience Mallory absolutely held her ground and more than once backed him down. He guessed at least Leah had the same skills, and Grace, while she operated differently, was no pushover. Hell, she tracked Callen across the country and demanded he be a father to his kid. That took guts, since Callen hated her at the time. Walker wasn’t sure about Sophie but sometimes it was the outwardly quieter ones who packed the wallop.

  “We’re wary of pissing them off because they are strong, and when challenged, fierce.” Declan cleared his throat. “And then there’s the group dynamic.”

  Tom shifted until he sat on the edge of the roof and stared down. “Not to raise the red flag but they are inside together right now.”

  Walker wasn’t sure what that added but he appeared to be alone. “Yeah, so?”

  “Who do you think Mallory is talking about right now?” Declan pointed to the dead center of Walker’s chest.

  “She’s getting advice about how to handle you and how much of a dick you are,” Callen added before Walker could answer.

  That all sounded good . . . as in scary as hell . . . but they were forgetting one thing. The ultimate weapon on the side of reason also stood in that kitchen. “But Kim is in there.”

  Tom scoffed. “You’ve got to be kidding. That’s not going to help you.”

  Walker waited for Declan and Callen to contradict Tom, but they didn’t. Walker was smart enough to know that was a bad sign. “She’s a mom.”

  Tom started back down the ladder. “And that makes her the toughest woman in that room.”

  “If you fucked up she will help Mallory teach you whatever lesson they all decide you need to learn,” Callen said.

  “You make the women sound . . .” Their previous comments slammed into him. “Strong and fierce. Oh, I see it. I’m screwed.”

  “Now he’s getting it.” Declan almost looked relieved at the idea.

  That did nothing to ease the grinding in Walker’s gut. “What do I do?”

  Callen looked up. “I’d get up on the roof.”

  Declan nodded. “And never come down.”

  ***

  A half hour later the men shuffled in, one after the other, each with his head down. Each peeking up and smiling but not saying a word. They washed their hands and did a lot of nodding as they helped getting the food to the table.

  Mallory didn’t know what happened out there, but she had a feeling it wasn’t a fight. No, this was something else. Something weirdly cathartic in that Walker wasn’t separating from Callen and Declan. If anything they seemed joined in some sort of common goal. Now she wanted to know what.

  They all filed around the table and then took their chairs. There were more seats than usual. They almost sat on top of each other despite Leah and Kim having added two boards to the table to take it to full size.

  Energy zipped around the room as they passed dishes and the men commented on how good everything smelled and looked. Gone was the usual goading and name-calling. They acted almost . . . normal. Or what Mallory assumed was normal for other families. For the Hanovers the lack of joking and ribbing each other struck her as odd.

  Kim was the first to speak up. She passed the tray of bacon before calling down from the head of the table. “Walker?”

  He dropped his fork. “Yes, ma’am.”

  Mallory put her hand on his knee and felt his foot tapping against the floor. “Why are you so jumpy?”

  “Yeah, Walker. Why?” Callen asked in a high-pitched voice.

  The gentle chiding was a relief to Mallory. If Callen verbally poked at Walker then everything was fine. The world kept spinning and she could deal with the fallout. It’s when the men got quiet and kept glancing at each other that she got nervous.

  “It was good to see you out there working this morning, Walker.” Kim took a scoop of eggs then passed the plate to Declan.

  From what Mallory had seen, the guys spent the pre-breakfast time out there talking about something. Probably how much they disliked each other. But at least no one got punched. That amounted to progress . . . sort of.

  But she had to smile at the conversation. Kim clearly was not ready to let Walker crawl back in his quiet hole and stop talking. Mallory wondered if she should try that tack. She was pretty sure she had at one point during their relationship, then abandoned it, but she was willing to try anything to get them in a stable place.

  When the room stayed silent and most gazes fell on him, Walker finally piped up with an answer. “I have some roofing experience.”

  “Since when?” The question came out before Mallory could stop it. The kick from Leah who sat across from her came a beat too late.

  “Since I was seventeen.”

  “I guess that’s one of your hidden skills.” Mallory expected a snotty response to her volley of snottiness. She probably deserved one since she was employing the Callen Hanover Verbal Poking skill and not doing it all that well.

  Instead, Walker smiled. “It doesn’t come in handy in the office, so I tend not to advertise it or bring it out at parties.”

  “I’m sure.” Kim slipped her white napkin from under her silverware and folded it on her lap. “But it’s perfect for the family property.”

  Declan’s hand froze with a fork full of eggs halfway to his mouth. “Subtle, Mom.”

  Kim didn’t let the conversation stop her breakfast. With a cool demeanor, she kept passing food, filling her plate and cutting up the apple slices sitting on the edge of her plate. “You know how I feel.”

  Mallory didn’t even understand the topic, and if Walker’s narrowed eyes were any indication, he didn’t either. “About what?” she asked.

  Kim’s slim shoulders rose and fell. “I think Walker should keep his interest in the house and become a partner with his brothers.”

  The room held its collective breath. Mallory waited for Walker to flinch at the word “brothers” or to insist they weren’t related. But for once the denials never came. He sat there, staring at Kim and not saying a word.

  So Mallory said what she thought . . . not that anyone asked. “Me, too.”

  “In case you haven’t noticed, we don’t exactly get along,” Walker pointed out.

  Declan shrugged. “If it helps, you’re getting less annoying.”

  “Slowly,” Callen said. “Really slowly but you are getting to be tolerable to be around.”

  “I also think you should stay in Sweetwater, but saying that would be butting in, and that’s not my style.” Kim looked at Tom. “Right?”

  He was smart enough to nod and not say another word.

  Mallory wasn’t sure anyone would have heard him anyway. All of the attention stayed on Walker.

  He lowered his fork to the table. “Wow.”

  Kim winced. “Too much?”

  Walker’s mouth opened then closed. It took another few seconds before he actually kicked out a word. “I’m not sure, since I never really had a mother figure. I don’t know when a comment is considered crossing a line.”

  “Well, you should get used to it,” Kim said as she moved the eggs around on her plate.

  Leah smiled at the woman who would one day soon be her mother-in-law. “She’s a pretty great mom. And that’s coming from someone who hasn’t had a biological mom for most of her life.”

  “I’ve basically adopted her.”
Mallory didn’t consider that an exaggeration either. She found something very comforting about Kim. She was this pillar of strength. She’d been through so much and didn’t falter. She’d made mistakes and owned up to them. She found a younger man who obviously had a huge crush on her, and she had the good sense not to shove him away.

  As far as role models went, Kim Hanover was a pretty great one.

  “I consider you both family and we’re lucky to have you.” Kim looked around the table. “All of you, blood-related and not.”

  Callen glanced over at Walker. “Watch out because I think you’re the next one she plans to co-opt as one of hers.”

  Declan nodded. “That means she can tell you what to do.”

  “That doesn’t seem so bad.” Under the table, in private and out of the fray, Walker’s hand slid over Mallory’s lower thigh. He kept going until his fingers tangled with hers. “When you’ve had nothing you come to appreciate something.”

  Declan laughed. “There you go Mom. He just said you’re better than nothing.”

  “I didn’t mean it that way at all.” There was no heat in Walker’s voice.

  Mallory heard awe and confusion, maybe a bit of hope. She guessed the others heard it, too, because no one spoke. No smart-ass comments or comebacks. Leah didn’t make him eat his words. They all looked from Kim to Walker as if seeing what she planned to do.

  Kim winked at him. “I know exactly what you meant and was not insulted at all.”

  The conversation started up again. Callen and Declan argued over paint colors with Leah. Grace declared herself Switzerland. Tom threatened to walk off the job. So, basically, business as usual in this house.

  When Leah insisted that she get to help with the construction, Callen jumped on the offer. Declan gave a “we’ll see” response. Mallory heard it all, saw it all. Felt the warmth of the family as it wove its magic around the room.

  But her lifeline was the hand holding hers under the table. A simple romantic gesture Mallory never expected. Not here. Not with everyone else in the room.

  As the discussions waged on, Walker leaned over and whispered. “Did I blow it?”

  She knew he was talking about Kim but she answered more globally. “This time you saved it.”

  He frowned. “That’s good, right?”

  It meant everything, and she squeezed his hand in the hope of telegraphing that to him. “Yes.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Walker stepped through the doorway to Gossamer the next night somewhat unsure of what his welcome would be. After the breakfast he’d worked all day in the yard at Shadow Hill. Even showed Mallory and Leah some roofing basics. They learned fast and worked hard.

  He told Callen and Declan they’d messed up in making the house rehab into a male-only job when two capable women were right there. The women seemed to appreciate that. Leah even managed to send a half smile in his direction. Which was a nice balance to the you’re-a-dead-man glare Declan chose. The guy clearly didn’t like Leah working near danger, even when the risks were limited.

  The day turned into a hot night. He’d arrived back at Mallory’s place half expecting a fight. Instead, she rode him until his body tightened and he begged for mercy.

  But that was yesterday. Mallory’s mood had been flipping day to day as she pressed him to share more of his life and background with her. As almost everyone had pointed out to him by now, he didn’t share well. He took in information, assessed and planned. Talking things through with someone else was just not on his radar or anything he had experience with outside of the office.

  Grace had been his partner at the Bureau. He’d had others before her and gone through training and worked on teams and special operations. But working a case was a different beast. The idea of spilling about his private life made his mind go blank. Which probably explained the trouble at work and ongoing confusion with Mallory.

  Truth was he’d never even wanted to share before her. Talking about his birth made it real and linked him to Charlie, a man who never even recognized his existence. But so much had changed since Walker met her, including his emotional block to letting people in. Through her he’d opened up with Kim and the rest of the Hanover crew. Instead of getting derailed or pushed away, they welcomed him.

  That response, so unguarded, threw him off. Actually kept him from asking the obvious questions about what he’d seen weeks ago in the backyard and what they really knew about the whereabouts of all that Charlie stole. Part of him hated to dig because once he did this brief window into having a pseudo-family would slam shut.

  And he would lose Mallory. That idea had become intolerable.

  She smiled as he approached the cash register. Not one of those friendly looks she saved for customers. No, this one brimmed with warmth and lit her eyes.

  Damn, she was beautiful. Every inch of her. Every piece of her. Everything about her.

  He’d tried to write the attraction off to a momentary need. When that didn’t work he focused on her body, all curvy and so right for him. But this went deeper, to who she was and how she made him feel and what he wanted out of life when he looked at her.

  He’d fallen in love with her, and damn if that didn’t make him the dumbest man alive. His job and his life were on the other side of the country now. The world he’d run from and had trained himself to hate sat right here, in this town and so connected to her and her happiness. You couldn’t attack the Hanovers without also attacking Mallory. Not that he even had much of a desire to go after anyone named Hanover right now.

  When he saw her his mind wandered to all the things he couldn’t have. Stability. A home. The possibility of a family of sorts here in Sweetwater—all the things he professed to hate.

  She ran the last of the cash receipts tape as she eyed him up. “This must mean it’s seven o’clock.”

  He hated that she stayed open this late some nights. Even in a small town things could go very wrong. Not on his watch. “Your escort service has arrived.”

  She motioned toward his arm. “With a bag.”

  “Dinner.”

  She rubbed her hands together as she pivoted around the counter and met him on the other side. She tugged at the corner of the bag. “What did you get?”

  “Not takeout.” And for a second he felt bad about that. He hated to see her face fall and that excitement seep out of her.

  But it didn’t. She continued to try to peek inside the bag that clearly said Schneider’s Grocery on it and should give her a clue. “You did promise to make me dinner and we already had to reschedule once to work on the roof.”

  Looked like she was engaging in selective memory. “We postponed because you insisted I take you up on that roof with me.”

  Once up there, neither Leah nor Mallory wanted to stop. They got into it, listening to everything he said and following his instructions. By Walker’s way of thinking they were easier to work with than Callen and Declan, and far harder to distract. One wrong word and Declan and Callen would take off on a tangent. Not the women. They’d kept up a steady dialogue but never used it as an excuse to rest.

  Walker had been pretty damn impressed. Now he wanted dinner.

  “Then we came back and I almost fell asleep in the shower.” Mallory flexed her muscles. “My arms still ache.”

  “It’s hard work.” He lifted the bag a little higher. “Which is why you’ve definitely earned a homemade dinner.”

  “We’re having chips for dinner?” She gave a thumbs-up to that idea. “I mean, that’s fine with me. I believe the chip family should be a major food group.”

  “I told you I’d make you an actual dinner.” He thought back. So much had happened that he started to doubt whether he’d actually made the offer. “Tonight’s the night.”

  Her eyes softened. “Very good.”

  He hoped that mushy thing was a good sign. “Pasta with homemade sauce.”

  He’d call it his specialty but it really wasn’t. He had a few go-to recipes because going out to din
ner every night had gotten too expensive and too easy. A guy had to mix in a salad every now and then or risk spending all of his extra time in the gym working off burgers.

  Mallory went through her usual shutdown checklist. She checked drawers and locked this and that. He could only watch in a state of awe at the ease with which she moved. Those motorcycle boots didn’t slow her down one bit.

  “I wasn’t sure you had recovered from yesterday’s big breakfast,” she said as she buzzed around him.

  He followed on the walk-through, helping where he could to move the whole thing along. “I thought it went okay.”

  He tried to downplay it like he’d been doing in his head ever since he’d left that breakfast table. He wanted to say it didn’t matter what Kim said or how welcome he felt. Or the idea that Leah showed some thawing and Grace winked at him . . . but it totally did. That sort of bond eluded him for thirty-five years. Stumbling across it now made him twitchy. He should shove it all away and not care, but for whatever reason he couldn’t do anything but struggle against embracing it.

  Mallory turned the sign in the door and rechecked the locks before setting the alarm. “I worried the family aspect might bother you.”

  “No.” And that scared the hell out of him. “Are you ready to lock up and go upstairs?”

  A half hour later they waited upstairs. Everything had been chopped and combined. The sauce now simmered in a pan. He wanted the combination to cook down for at least an hour before he put in the pasta. At this rate it would be midnight before they ate, but he didn’t mind.

  Being in the studio filled him with an unexpected peace. He wasn’t really a guy who had known calm and easy during his life. With her, despite the wild intimacy or maybe because of it, the little things took on huge significance. Whether standing with her in the kitchen or watching her get dressed in the morning, he got sucked in.

  Even now while she changed out of her work clothes and got cleaned up in the bathroom, he walked around her studio. It didn’t take long to do the full circle since the condo consisted of about two rooms. Yet in the small place she had shelves lined with books and photos everywhere, mostly of scenery but a few with her and Leah.

 

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