At this point, she was beginning to be able to synthetize everything more clearly. She knew that there would be part of her that always wanted her and Drew to be together. She had to at least try to make things right with him. If only for the child. She clicked on his text and brought up the keypad.
“Just talked to Juliet. Feeling much better,” she typed out.
“Glad to hear it.” The text came back from Drew almost instantly.
“We probably should discuss how this whole baby thing is going to go down,” Quinn texted him.
“What’s to discuss?”
“Like what it’s last name will be.”
“I see. I’ll come over in a few and we can talk about it then.”
12
Drew jumped in his SUV and started the long trip to Quinn’s cabin. He had a feeling she wanted to talk about more than the baby’s last name. In fact, he was sure of it. He could feel Quinn’s emotions inside him, and he could tell she wanted something.
She wanted him. The feeling of her desire for him filled his soul the way it had the night they’d made love. The last thing Drew wanted to do was get sucked back into Quinn’s crazy, confused world. He partially understood why she’d done what she’d done, but at the same time, he didn’t think he could ever fully understand it.
Drew had no intention of being caught up in Quinn’s web again. That was not the reason he was going out to the cabin. Was it?
No. It wasn’t. He was going out there to discuss the birth of their child. Period.
He wanted to give his son his name. He wanted to be part of the cub’s life from day one. Drew would have to figure out how to be around Quinn for the next eighteen years of their kid’s life. There was no way around that if he wanted to be the cub’s father.
He pulled out onto the highway and drove until the turnout toward the cabin. It was a long way from town and maybe not the best place for a pregnant woman.
The rain had started up again last night and hadn’t stopped since. The ground was already soaked from the previous months of rain. He hoped the cabin would hold up under these conditions.
The more he thought about it, the less he liked the idea of her staying out at the rural cabin. Still, he wasn’t willing to have her in his house. He couldn’t have her or her feelings that close to him. They had to get used to being in each other’s lives without being together. The sooner they started, the better.
Things wouldn’t get any easier after the baby came. He knew that from Shane. When Wild Bear’s mate had shown up on Fate Mountain with a five-year-old child Shane didn’t even know he had, it had complicated Shane and Lily’s already complicated relationship. Before the kid arrived was the best time to sort out all these things out.
Drew turned off onto the dirt road that led out to the cabin. When he crossed the bridge over the south fork of the river, he noticed how high the water was rushing below him.
He parked his car and walked up to the front door of the cabin. Quinn opened the door before he knocked. The look on her face took him aback for a moment. She looked so excited and happy to see him.
The feelings were coming off of her in waves that washed over him. He was bowled over by the sense of expectation and need radiating off of her. He took a step backward, not able to take in all the feelings she was stirring inside him.
His bear roared to bring his mate back to his own home. He had to protect her and the child. This was his mate. His cub. The grizzly inside him would not be contained. Drew gritted his teeth and growled at himself. He had to keep the bear under control. Drew wasn’t about to let his grizzly call the shots like Shane’s had for so long. He was quite familiar with what happened to a shifter when the animal took the upper hand. It wasn’t pretty.
“Come in,” Quinn said.
Drew realized he was gawking on the porch, unable to move. He blinked away the grizzly’s fevered grunting and shook his head to clear it further.
“Right,” he growled, walking into the cabin. She stepped aside, and Drew entered the living room that suddenly felt so small. His bear was close, so close, Drew could feel himself expanding outward, taking up more space than usual.
“How are you today?” Quinn said cheerfully.
He turned around and looked at her. Her expression changed and he regretted whatever harsh look he’d had on his face. Drew let out a long sigh and sat at the dining room table.
“What did you want to talk to me about?” he finally asked.
“The baby’s name,” she started. “I haven’t picked out a name because I didn’t know what his last name would be.”
“My name is Bock.”
“I know. I just…before I came here, I didn’t know if you’d give the child your name.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
Quinn sat across from him, looking more nervous than she had when he’d first arrived.
“I don’t know.”
“The only reason I wouldn’t claim the child is because you never told me you were expecting.”
“Okay. I deserve that.”
“What names were you thinking?”
“Maybe James?”
“James is boring.”
“William?”
“Also boring.”
“Do you have any ideas?” she said, as if she was already losing her patience.
Drew had lost his patience a long time ago. Having her here was taking every bit of self-control he had inside him. On one hand, all he wanted to do was get as far away from her as he possibly could. Then again, he needed to protect and provide for the child. And another part of him, the part he tried to squelch, wanted to claim his woman more than anything.
“I haven’t had much time to think about it,” he said.
“Well. Let’s just let that topic rest for now. You mentioned you could help me with my real estate issue.”
“Right. I talked to Levi, and he knows a guy in Portland that could sell it for you.”
“Really? Juliet didn’t mention it.”
“I just talked to him before I got your text. She probably didn’t know anything about it.”
“Who is this guy, anyway?”
“He’s a wolf shifter realtor. He and Levi know each other from back in the military.”
“You’re going to have a wolf shifter sell my condo?”
“Do you have a problem with that?” Drew asked her, wondering if that prejudice she claimed was no longer present in her life really was gone.
“No. Not really. I just…”
“You what?”
“I don’t know. I’m not used to being helped out by shifters so much. It feels strange. I’m sorry if you can’t understand that.”
“Look. I get it. Your parents were bigots. It’s hard to see that the people you hated your whole life are actually decent.”
“I haven’t hated shifters all my life,” she said, indignantly.
“Really? I guess I misunderstood.”
“You’re right, you did.”
“So the reason you thought I’d intentionally put you under a spell was…because you think shifters are all really cool people who should be treated with respect and human dignity?”
“Don’t be an ass,” she said, pushing herself up from the table.
As much as Quinn had hurt him, the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her, especially with her all pregnant like this. How had things gotten to this point? That night they’d spent together, he’d finally felt like he’d had it all figured out. The scattered pieces of his life had finally started to fit together. Then, the very next day, they were shattered again, making it worse than if he’d never known her.
“I’m sorry, Quinn. I’m as confused as you are. These last nine months have been the worst of my life.”
“You can’t be serious. You were at war for four years.”
“Believe it or not, being cut out of your mate’s life after marking her is worse than putting your life on the line to defend your country.”
“Drew, I never meant for this to happen.”
“That makes two of us. I guess that just goes to show, we were under each other’s spell.”
“You have a point. I shouldn’t have run out on you, Drew. It was wrong. I can accept that I made a mistake. I wish there was a way for me to take it back.”
“There’s no going back to how it was before.”
“Why not? Why can’t you forgive me?”
“Something happened to me while you were gone, Quinn. The night we made love, I fell for you so hard. When you left, I couldn’t get back up again. I was down for the count. I’ve been drinking too much, angry, moody. Angus even called me a drama queen.”
Quinn put both hands over her mouth to stifle a giggle, her eyes bulging with mirth.
“It isn’t funny,” he said, crossing his arms.
“Are you a drama queen?” she asked, the humor still thick in her voice.
“I’m sensitive, maybe. In the manliest way possible.”
“As long as it’s manly,” Quinn said, unable to stop giggling.
“Are you mocking me?” he asked, incredulous.
“I just find this extremely funny. You don’t look like a drama queen. Or any kind of queen for that matter.”
“Oh? What do I look like?” Drew said, drawing closer to make his point.
“You look like Brew Bear, my mate—” she said, cutting herself off.
Drew growled and slid out of his chair, pulling Quinn into an embrace. She let out a quivering breath as he pressed his lips to hers. He cupped her cheek, wanting to be so close, as close as they’d been the night he’d marked her.
“Drew. I want this. I want us,” Quinn breathed between kisses.
His inner bear roared, full of longing and pain. He wanted her. He’d marked her, claimed her. She belonged to him. But the pain was still so fresh, so raw. How could he let her in again?
“How can you know for sure?” he said, pulling away and looking her in the eye. “How is it any different this time?”
“I’ve had a lot of time to think, Drew. I’m having your baby,” she pleaded.
“Is it enough? Will it ever be enough? I’ll always be a shifter, Quinn.”
“I know. I’ve told you a hundred times why I left. It was a mistake I wish I could take back. I was so confused. I’m not confused anymore.”
“How am I supposed to know? I can’t tell the difference.”
“Drew. Look into your heart,” she said, reaching up to press her small hand to his big chest. “You’ll see my true feelings there. Just like I can see yours.”
“I thought I could feel you the last time. That’s why I went against my better judgment and made love to you, marked you. I would have turned you if you’d asked.”
Quinn gulped. “I know. I was out of control and that isn’t your fault. I accept my own responsibility. That’s what’s changed.”
He let out a long breath. “I don’t know if I can ever trust you again.”
“Do you trust this?” Quinn said, reaching up to press her lips to his.
He felt her round belly and ripe breasts press against his hard body. She was so soft and curvy, full of his child. Quinn was softer than the last time he’d kissed her, inside and out. It called to a place deep inside him, the place that would always love her more than anything on Earth. The feeling intensified, and he let go to it. He couldn’t resist her. Even if she hurt him again, he needed to hold her close right now.
“I trust my love for you,” Drew breathed into her ear.
13
Q uinn had been waiting to kiss him again since she’d left, even though she didn’t know it until he put his lips against hers in the little cabin that day. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer.
Drew was reluctant to give in to her desire for him, and she couldn’t blame him. She’d hurt him. Drew was a man who felt things deeply, tenderly, fully. He’d felt his love for her down into the core of his soul, and she’d betrayed that pure love in the worst way.
At that moment, Quinn vowed to never hurt him again. She would stay here in Fate Mountain and be his woman. She’d be the best mate she could be and hold his tender heart with care every day for the rest of her life.
“I can’t lose you again, Quinn,” he said, kissing her forehead with pent up energy she could feel radiating through his body.
“I’m not going to leave again. I swear it.”
“Come with me,” he said in a low growl.
He led her by the hand into the bedroom. They stood beside the bed, covered in a patchwork quilt. They both looked down at it, the memory of their last night together cycling between them. Drew pulled back the blankets and kicked off his shoes.
“I want to lie beside you,” he said, crawling into the bed fully clothed.
She climbed into the bed beside him, and he pulled the blankets up over their shoulders before snuggling in next to her. Their heads rested against their pillows, and they looked into each other’s eyes. Quinn felt that the deep freeze that had been in Drew’s heart was beginning to thaw. She could see the reawakening of his love and faith in the depths of his eyes.
He gathered her up in his arms, her head and belly resting against his hard body. His arms enveloped her in the warmest embrace. Quinn felt tears begin to gather in the corners of her eyes. When she felt a tear drip on her cheek, she thought it was her own. She heard Drew sniffle, and she looked up at him. Tears were beginning to flow, and he pressed his eyes closed hard when he saw she’d noticed.
“Drew?”
“Don’t,” he started.
“Why?”
“It’s fine,” he grumbled.
“Don’t be ashamed of your feelings, Drew.”
“You don’t think it makes me less of a man?” he said, breathing into the top of her head. His beard caressed her temple, and she sighed.
“No. I think it makes you more of a man. My man. The perfect man for me.”
He let out a quivering sigh and pulled her closer, pressing his lips to hers.
His hands roved her rounded body, sending little sparks of need through her whole being. She hadn’t been touched in so long. All this time, growing the child inside her. She’d been so alone. More alone than she’d ever been. To have Drew’s hands on her now, she didn’t want to stop. She wanted him to claim what was his. This time for good, forever.
“Drew…make love to me,” she whispered up into his ear.
“Are you sure? What about the baby?”
“You just don’t crush me. Everything else is fine.”
He growled, his hands dipping between her thighs.
“You have no idea how much I want this,” he growled.
“I think I do,” she said, rubbing his hardness.
He ran his hand under her fluffy sweater and cupped her swollen breast. She was so ripe with need, her body throbbed at his touch. Drew slid his hand inside her bra and rolled her nipple between his fingers while he kissed her lips and face.
“I need you naked,” he growled into her ear.
Quinn giggled as she started to peel her clothes off. The fluffy sweater came up over her head and the stretchy pants she’d been wearing were stripped down her legs by Drew. He licked his lips as he looked down at her and he hovered over her, his hand resting on either side of her round belly.
“It’s like unwrapping a present,” he said, pulling down her panties.
Quinn quivered and gushed, unhooking her bra and throwing it away from the bed. Drew sucked her needy breasts, making her pussy throb to be licked and filled. Quinn gasped and bit her lip. Drew ran his tongue down her belly and slowly slid downward, spreading her legs open. He inhaled deeply as he focused on her core.
“You smell so sweet. Like a ripe berry. I want to lick up the taste of you.”
Quinn shuddered, propped up on her elbows to watch Drew focus on her slick sex. His wide, thick tongue lapped up the length of her core, making her quiver with excitement. She threw her head bac
k, squeezing her eyes closed.
She could feel his beard caress between her thighs and across the planes of her ass as he ravaged her with his tongue. Quinn laid down, grasping her breasts with a needy moan.
“Drew,” she gasped as the first tendrils of orgasm began to unfurl inside her.
Drew slid a thick finger into her, and her release broke free. It radiated through her, and she groaned into the intensity of it. This whole time she’d been dreaming of Drew’s touch. No matter how guilty she’d felt, she could never erase the memory of their night together and the love they’d shared.
He climbed over her and rolled onto the bed beside her, running his hands over her sensitized skin. She could feel him hard against her back as he grasped her breasts and pulled her back against his chest. He angled his cock against the slick space between her legs, rubbing back and forth.
Quinn was so alive with desire, he buried himself inside her with one thrust. She gasped, her mouth falling open. Drew licked the back of her ear and rolled her nipples between his fingers as he moved in a slow, rocking motion with his hips.
She tilted her face back, hungering for his kiss. Their tongues danced as they made love. The connection between them cycled in an exponentially increasing rhythm that lifted Quinn into another world where everything was perfect. Their love elevated everything, and she never wanted to be let down.
Drew slid his teeth over the mark he’d left the last time they’d made love. The mark she’d begged him to give her. In that moment, with him deep inside her body and soul, she would have begged him to do it again.
He sucked her neck and flicked the tight bud between her legs, pushing her arousal to the breaking point. Drew was everywhere, all around her. She’d never felt more safe or more loved. In that perfect moment, they both let go. Quinn’s body clenched as Drew’s seed shot deep and hot into her core.
He growled behind her and then went still, holding her gently in his arms. She looked back at him, searching his face. Slowly, he pulled away, and she turned to him. Drew enfolded her in his arms and she laid against his muscled chest. This was what she’d been missing.
Brew Bear (Bear Shifter Paranormal Romance) (Rescue Bears Book 4) Page 8