by Jami Denise
I flinched, disgusted and ashamed. “Everyone has their reasons, Flynn. We’ve gone over this. You have your daddy, and I have mine. There’s a lottery as far as family goes, and my scratcher was blank. This wasn’t what I envisioned for my future, but shit happens. Life happens. I do what I have to do.”
He grabbed my hand and pulled me back against him, wrapping his arm around my waist and holding me down against him.
“I’m not insulting you, Jayne. I’m trying to tell you that I want to give you more.”
He didn’t let me answer; instead his lips invaded mine, releasing me of all thoughts. All I could think about was him, his words. I wanted to believe him. God, how I wanted to. In what universe would a man like Flynn want me? All I knew was that I was lost to him. Gone. I was willing to take the plunge.
I gave everything I had in that kiss. I told him my heart wanted him, my body craved him, and that I wanted him in every way possible. I was running with a ghost, an invisible compulsion that had wracked my body the very first time I laid eyes on him.
Memories of the first time I really noticed Flynn came at me like a film reel. It was in another casino his father owned. I’d been there with some friends in the lounge. I caught a glimpse of him from across the room, and I was done for. It was his laugh that got me. And then his eyes.
His laugh was so genuine, real, and full of true happiness. There was no mistake, the way he through his head back, his eyes squinting and his knees bending. I found myself smiling as I watched him.
Unfortunately, he’d been with a girl, a gorgeous blonde with big fleshy tits and dress three sizes too small. He never took his hands off her, so I watched from afar.
After that, I’d see him randomly, sometimes in nightclubs, sometimes in the casinos, but never did I see him alone. It was intimidating and definitely disappointing, but I was used to that. As Janie, I was invisible. A nobody. It was one of the reasons I loved playing Jayne. I could con the men into believing anything I wanted them to. I convinced them that I was the woman of their dreams, the once in a lifetime girl they’d never forget.
Flynn wanted Jayne, and she was all but gone. I had run out of steam, and once it was all said and done, she’d be gone for good. He was under the illusion that I was that girl, glamorous and mysterious, when in fact I was nothing but a liar and a crook.
His lips went to my neck as his body moved down mine. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, as badly as I wanted to. I wanted to let go and get lost in his touch, but I couldn’t allow myself to forget one moment.
His tongue laved over my nipple while his hand went to the other. Softly, he held the weight of my breast in his hand, and I was on fire. I squirmed underneath him, his weight pressing me down.
Smiling, his tongue darted out and flicked at my nipple causing me to hiss.
“Please,” I pleaded.
“You want me, Jayne?”
“God… yes,” I whined. “I’ve waited so long.”
He looked surprised, like he had no idea that I wanted him. “When?” he asked. “When did you start wanting me?”
“So long ago,” I panted. “I’ve always thought you were so beautiful.”
He invaded my mouth again with a new determination. His hands were wild, feeling and grabbing at everything he could. It was exhilarating, freeing. I knew the moment I walked into his suite at The Maguire it was going to be explosive once it happened. The air crackled between us. The raw energy was too much to ignore.
Knowing now that I wasn’t a means to an end, that he’d actually sought me out personally, things were different. That shift was enough to push me past all the hang-ups and insecurities. I wasn’t just a whore to him. He wanted me—me—and that was more than I ever expected.
All his strange behaviors suddenly made sense. He was trying to get close to me without disrespecting me. Funny, my father had never even given me that kind of consideration. For him, the bottom line was the most important thing. He’d never had qualms about what I did for a living, no matter how degrading it was. As long as money was involved, it was all good.
For the first time in my life, I actually felt valued and cared for. I knew Vince loved me—he took good care of me—but my best interests? His head was up the same horse’s ass as my father’s was. I knew he loved me, but he was fucked up, too. We were a mess, all of us, and lying underneath Flynn while he worshipped me like a treasure, I realized just how far down the hole we’d fallen.
Flynn’s lips had made their way down my body, his breath hot against the softness of my stomach as he inched toward my pussy. The anticipation had been building for so long, it was like the longest unfulfilled orgasm ever.
“Look at me,” he demanded. His hooded eyes caught mine, holding me prisoner. “Watch me make love to you the way you deserve, Janie.”
My heart thundered. It felt like it would jump right out and crack my ribs. There was nothing sexier than seeing him between my legs, so eager to give me pleasure that his arms shook as he held himself up. I watched as his tongue darted out, tasting gently, before he closed his lips over my clit and sucked it into his mouth.
I fell back, unable to hold my head up anymore. My entire body was alert, vibrating with lust and throbbing with the need to have him inside of me. As delicious as it was having his mouth on me, I just needed to have him. All of him. I wanted him inside of me.
“I can’t, I can’t,” I cried. I tried to verbalize my needs, but it was impossible. He was like a man possessed, and there was no stopping him. A sane woman wouldn’t want to stop him. I was obviously over that edge.
I felt his finger nudge at my entrance, and my eyes flew open. The pressure was so good, so what I needed. I lifted my head again, feeling my whole body shake as I tried to hold myself up, and gasped when I saw the look in his eyes. He pumped, slowly, pushing his finger inside and curling inward before pulling out again. It was torture, pure and evil torture.
“Flynn, please… no more. Just fuck me. I want you to fuck me.”
His eyes darkened, and a smirk grew on his face. “Oh, I’m going to fuck you, Jayne. So fucking hard. You’re on my time, though. Remember? I’ve been waiting a long time to taste you, and I’m not stopping until I’ve had my fill.”
“Fuck.” I fell back against the mattress, raising my hips to meet his thrusts.
Again and again he pushed into me, until I felt another finger, and then his mouth once again. It was sensory overload, and I was toppling over. The man was good. Really good. Better than I’d ever had.
I wasn’t stupid. I knew why it felt different, but I was hardly in the position to think clearly.
It took me no time to fall apart, and the way he moaned as I came was enough to set me off again. He was so damn sexy, a man in every way. I wasn’t even sure I would live through actual penetration after that orgasm. I would probably die of heart failure.
He worked his way back up my body, kissing and nipping at my skin as he went. He couldn’t get enough. His need for me was so strong, I could feel it everywhere.
Bracing himself above me, he laid his forehead against mine, kissing my lips softly. “I need you to understand what this means, Janie. Once I have you, I’ll never let you go. You’re mine. No one else will touch you. I’ll fucking kill them.”
My breath caught in my throat. I could do nothing but nod. I did understand, and I felt the same. It was such a foreign feeling for me, but natural at the same time. I wanted to keep him too. I wanted to be his, and him mine. Tiny flashes of domestic bliss blasted in my mind, things I had no business wanting, but craved just the same. Could we have that? Was it even a possibility? I wasn’t sure, but I definitely knew that for as long as I had him, I was going to be happy.
“I’m serious. This is what I want. You. I’ve only wanted one thing from you, Jayne. Everything.”
My tongue was thick against the top of my mouth. My gut twisted with a word more unfamiliar than the look in his eyes. It was fighting its way out, clawing and kicking li
ke a wild animal. I saw it swimming in his face, both of us bracing ourselves for the four letter word that would completely change our lives.
It was crazy. It was impossible.
It was love.
Seeing the hesitance in my face, he fell next to me with a heavy sigh, his arm going across his face, the other across his stomach.
“I want to take you somewhere today. Sleep. You’ll need it.”
I curled up on my side, fighting tears. I was scared. It was too soon, but it was there. We both knew it.
“We have all weekend. I want to take my time, Janie. I’m not pressuring you into anything. You want it—you just need to realize it.”
His arms went around me, pulling me back against him. He kissed my neck, rubbed my belly. Tender. Sincere. Perfect.
Crickets sang outside our window. The sparks of light from the dark, desert night glowed through the drapes like a light show. It was serene and comforting. I felt safe… loved.
Just as my eyes began to fall heavy and my breathing slowed, I turned over, wrapping my arms around him and laid my head against his chest and kissed him right above his heart.
“I do. I want that. All you have, I want.”
TWELVE
The next morning, I woke up alone. Alarmed, I shot out of bed, wrapped the sheet around my body, and padded out of the room to find Flynn.
I found him on the patio, shirtless and gorgeous in a pair of athletic shorts slung low on his hips. A dark, sprawling tattoo marred his back, spanning from shoulder to shoulder. I’d noticed it before, but hadn’t really paid attention. There were so many other things to look at when it came to Flynn.
But at that moment, it stood out. It was angry, vulgar, and tragic.
Tension rolled off him, the strong ropes of hard muscles of his back and shoulders twitched as he swung his arms while he paced. Whatever the conversation was about, it was pissing him off.
I didn’t want to interrupt or eavesdrop, so I turned to go back in the house as quietly as I could without him noticing me.
“Wait,” I heard him say. I turned, and he held a finger up for me. “I’ll call you back. Find out what’s going on and make sure nothing fucks this up.”
He pulled the phone away from his ear and slid it into the waistband of his shorts. The stress that stretched across his brow eased as he smiled at me.
“C’mere.”
He held out his arms, and I wasted no time finding my way inside them. We’d had a huge breakthrough the night before, and everything felt completely different with him. I trusted him—something I didn’t do lightly.
With my dad’s freedom within my grasp, I was finally going to let my inhibitions go and see where life took me. I was allowing myself to love a beautiful man, and accept what he had to give me in return.
“Is everything okay?”
I didn’t want to presume he’d enlighten me about the conversation, but I felt vulnerable and wanted to see how much he’d allow of himself. The more he gave, the more I’d give.
I was so out of my damn element.
“Just business, sweet Jayne. Did you sleep well?”
I had. I’d slept like a baby in his arms. Admitting I wanted something more with him took a huge load off my back. I no longer felt like I carried the sins of my father, or the sins of my past. I was ready to unload them. Toss them off a bridge.
“Better than ever. I wish you would’ve been there when I woke up, though.”
A gentle kiss to the top of my head and I was mush. “I had to take that call. I was going to climb back in bed before you woke up. Tomorrow morning, we won’t leave the bed at all.”
My heart fluttered in my chest. “What about today?” My voice was suggestive, and my body warmed with the hope that we’d return to the bed and finish what we started the night before.
His eyes smoldered, and I was up and over his shoulder before I knew what hit me. I let out a small squeal, then giggled. This is what happiness felt like. The light, flirty playfulness was something I’d never experienced.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
Giving my ass a hard slap, he laughed. “I’m taking you back to bed and giving you that fuck I promised.”
“Oh God.”
His chuckle turned dark. “You better start praying. You can’t come outside in nothing and expect me to act like a gentleman, Jayne King.”
“Janie,” I said, my voice losing all its strength. “Call me Janie again.”
We’d reached the bedroom, and he placed me on the bed gently, kneeling in between my legs.
“Janie.” He ran his knuckles over my cheek, and then leaned forward to kiss me, pressing me backward.
“Janie, Janie, Janie.” He chanted my name over and over again as he marked my body with his lips.
The sheet was gone, and finally there was nothing between me and the hard muscles of his chest. I reached around and ran my fingernails down his back, remembering the tattoo.
“Your tattoo is huge.”
His lips raised in a smirk. “Oh, come on. You want me to comment on your manhood?”
Reaching across the bed, he pulled a foil packet from underneath the pillow, ripping it open and slid it over his length quickly.
Without another word, he lifted my legs over his shoulders, his eyes searing into mine as he positioned himself at my opening and then slid inside, one torturous inch at a time.
My jaw slack and my limbs numb, I held my breath until he was completely inside of me. No matter what, I knew I would never feel that good again as long as I lived. Ever. My eyelids were heavy, but I couldn’t take my eyes off him.
He was so strong, so beautiful. Everything about him screamed sin, and yet, he was tender. I felt it, saw it, knew it. He was pouring himself into me, body and soul. I felt worshipped, loved. For the first time in my life, I was making love.
He was making love.
By the look in his eyes, it was a first for him, too. We were two souls discovering what it felt like to belong to someone, to open our hearts to another, and at that moment I felt like the luckiest woman alive.
“Jesus, Jayne, so fucking beautiful,” he groaned. “I knew it was going to feel like this. Like fucking heaven.”
He ground his hips into mine, swiveling his hips before bucking them back. Over and over he thrust into me, my entire body quaking with each strong snap of his hips.
Letting go of my legs, he fell over me, holding himself up with his elbows as he continued to work himself in and out of me. He was taking his time, relishing in every minute we spent together. I could tell he was holding off. I didn’t want him to. I wanted him to devour me.
The sound and smell of sex was everywhere. It was thick and vivid and consumed every inch of the room. Dust, shadows, air—it was all saturated with us. There was nothing but me and him, our love, our bodies.
“Harder,” I cried. “Please, harder.” I was begging. I was so close, yet I didn’t really want it to end. It was too much and not enough all at once.
“You feel so good, so tight,” he said, grinding his teeth. “I’m not going to last, baby. I need you to come.”
His lips leaned down, and the heat in his kiss was enough to throw me over the edge. My body shattered and I clung to him, clawing at his back as I rode it out.
A few more pumps, and his body stilled, and I felt as he filled me before collapsing on top of me.
I held him tight against me, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, and tangling my legs with his. His warm breath was ragged against my neck as he tried to calm down. When I felt him try to get up, I held him even tighter, not wanting to let him go for a second.
Ever.
“Janie, I’m crushing you.”
I smiled against his shoulder and then laid a gentle kiss on his sweaty skin. “I like it. I want you to.”
He chuckled. “I’m never letting you go, Janie.”
“I hope that’s true.”
Pulling back to look at me, he let his eyes s
can my face. “That was beautiful.”
I gave a little nod, and pulled my hand forward to run over his smooth cheek. He was breathtaking. He’d shown me more respect and more consideration in one moment that I’d ever expected from a man.
“You’re beautiful,” I told him. I meant it. He was truly something to look at.
With a grin and a peck on my lips, he jumped up, holding his hand out for me to take. “Come on. Let’s get a shower before we get dirty again.”
I giggled as he lifted me from the bed and then carried me to the bathroom, using his foot to slam the door shut behind us.
THIRTEEN
Being on Flynn Maguire’s arm was an exhilarating feeling. Every eye was on us as we entered the casino. The sound of my heels as they tapped against the marble floors thundered in my head. My heart pounded. They could tell there was something special about the two of us. We filled a room like stars in the sky.
Heads turned, jaws dropped, and I stood proud as a peacock. Being on his arm was something. In all reality, yes, he’d bought me, but things were quickly going in another direction. There would be no more money exchanged when we spent our time together. We were one and the same—equal. He wanted me next to him, and I needed to be there.
I’d been a little nervous about stepping out in public, especially since I hadn’t heard from Vince. That made me nervous. I’d hoped to have a resolution already, and every hour that went by, I was a little more concerned.
It wasn’t like Vince to leave me in the dark, either. He hadn’t even checked up on me, and I had to have faith that it meant things were going as planned.
Being with Flynn made me forget for the most part, and that was a good thing. We’d fucked the entire day away, and I was truly disappointed when it was time to go.
Plus, my nerves pricked even more once he told me where we were going.
A poker game.
The irony alone made me want to puke. It was too close to home, too familiar. Flynn’s reputation was epic. I knew he hardly ever walked away from a table empty-handed, and I was sure the influence of his name gave him a better advantage than people like my dad. Still, I had a knot in my gut, and it just wouldn’t ease up.