“I haven’t—”
He broke off as she shouldered her way past, into his living room. Sam closed the door and followed her to the couch where she set the carrier and an overflowing diaper bag. He glanced toward the kitchen, searching out his cell phone on the counter. Was he going to have to call the cops to get rid of her?
The baby started to cry, so Nikki picked her up and rocked her while speaking in a soft, crooning voice. The gentle sound soothed his nerves until common sense returned with a vengeance.
Denial shook his head as he moved to stand in front of her. “Listen, I don’t know what you think you’re going to get out of this, but we’ve never met before, much less done what we would’ve needed to do to create that baby.”
He damn sure would’ve remembered her—though he kept that thought to himself. Anything that could be construed as encouragement would be a dumb move right about now.
Her eyes sparked when she shifted her gaze to meet his. “I said she’s yours, not mine.”
What? “Now you’re really not making sense.”
The pregame music began to play on his TV as she pulled a folded piece of paper from her jeans pocket and handed it over.
“I found her on your front porch an hour ago. Do you know someone named Rae?”
The name hit with the force of a sledgehammer. Oh, God, Raelyn. He slowly reached for the paper, dread sinking in his stomach as he unfolded the note and read the words. He dropped down onto the couch as his legs went numb.
What the hell?
“So you do know her,” Nikki observed, a hint of accusation in her voice.
“Rae is my sister.”
“Your sister?”
Rae. What were you thinking?
“So, Ella really isn’t yours.”
He was an uncle. Who apparently was now expected to care for the child. But he didn’t know the first thing about kids. There was no way in hell he could care for one.
Numb, Sam lifted his gaze to the woman standing before him, still rocking the now-quiet baby as she watched him. Sympathy simmered in her wide blue eyes. She extended the pink bundle in her arms. “You want to hold your niece?”
“No.” Alarm propelled him to his feet, and he moved to put the couch between them. As if a physical barrier would stop what was happening. Man, did he wish that were true.
She smiled with gentle understanding. “Not familiar with babies, are you?”
“No. And I don’t want to become familiar with them.”
“She won’t break,” Nikki assured him as if he hadn’t said that last bit.
Yeah, right. His hands were best at gripping a hammer, or a nail gun, not cradling a tiny human being.
“Can you call your sister?”
He lifted both hands to the back of his head, clasping his fingers tight. “Rae, ah, travels around a lot. We haven’t kept in touch.”
“Obviously.”
The glare he directed her way was ignored.
“Is there anyone else who’s close to her?” she continued. “Or who you could call to help? Your parents, other siblings?”
Frustration mounted and he shook his head. “It’s just us. But there’s no way I can take care of a baby. She’s gotta be joking.”
“Leaving your baby girl with a note on your brother’s porch doesn’t seem like a joke to me,” his neighbor observed with reproach in her voice.
“I don’t know anything about kids. I don’t know what the hell my sister was thinking.” Actually, he might be able to guess, but he wasn’t about to share that information with a stranger.
“You’ll learn.”
“I don’t want to learn,” he exclaimed, lowering his arms.
She glared at him. The baby spit out her pacifier and it tumbled to the floor despite Nikki’s quick grab. She squatted to pick it up, then headed toward the kitchen, her jaw clenched tight, shoulders rigid.
So? What did she care? And what did he care what she thought? Bracing his hands on the back of the couch, he glared at the TV while trying to figure out what to do. White static fuzzed in his head.
He heard the water turn on and off, and then a moment later his neighbor returned to the living room to stand beside him with the baby.
Sam moved a few feet away before turning to face her. “There’s got to be someplace I can call, right? Family services or something.”
Incredulity widened Nikki’s eyes. “She’s your niece. Family. You can’t just turn her over to the state—she’ll end up in foster care with God only knows who!”
Pressure bore down on him, boxing him into a corner, with her and the baby blocking his way to freedom.
“Your sister trusted you.”
“Maybe she shouldn’t have,” he exclaimed. Nikki opened her mouth, and he threw up a hand to ward off her argument. “Just shut up and give me a minute to think about this. I didn’t even know my sister was pregnant!”
He spun around and paced to the kitchen. His neck prickled from the accusatory gaze drilling into his back with each step he took, and he fought not to shrug at the uncomfortable sensation. It crossed his mind to keep going, right out the back door, but it was his own damn house.
“You can think all you want, Sam,” Nikki called after him, “but it doesn’t change the fact that this little baby girl is depending on you to step up and take care of her. She needs you to not abandon her like your sister did.”
The heated reproach in her voice increased the effect of her words tenfold. The two-ton ball of lead sitting in the pit of his stomach grew a thick layer of guilt. He hadn’t stuck around for Rae back when their mother left them with their aunt. Seventeen and pissed off, he’d struck out on his own and didn’t return until his little sister had already headed too far down the wrong road to turn back. He didn’t even know how the hell she’d found him when he’d never been able to locate her over the years.
Damn it. He owed her this, and he knew it.
Sudden silence from the living room brought him around in time to see Nikki set the TV remote on the counter next to his forgotten beer as she entered the kitchen. She stalked right up to him and pushed the baby into his arms before he could do more than take one reflexive step backward. The counter brought him to a jarring halt, trapping him when it dug into his back.
His heart leapt into his throat as his arms involuntarily closed around the tiny bundle. She won’t break. Despite the bulk of the blanket, she felt like a lump of plaster that he might accidentally squish with one wrong move. She was so light. And squirmy.
He stood stiff as a board, afraid any movement would be the wrong one.
“Relax,” Nikki instructed. “Hold her like a wide receiver holds a football as he’s running for the end zone.”
He jerked his gaze up to hers at the surprise analogy.
“Just don’t squeeze too hard,” she cautioned with an encouraging smile.
Sam quickly dropped his gaze. He gingerly shifted the baby, and she settled into the crook of his arm. Not so bad. He lifted his hand to move the blanket away from her face, and one little hand grabbed hold of his work-rough finger. Her skin was soft, but her grip was strong. A sudden lump formed in his throat as he gazed down into the baby’s eyes. They were so full of innocence and trust.
Ella. Indefinable emotion constricted his chest, making it hard to breathe. At the same time, he felt a spontaneous smile tug at the corner of his mouth.
“There you go,” Nikki murmured, an odd note in her soft voice. “See? You’re going to do just fine.”
He glanced up for a brief second, then did a double take. Where those tears in her eyes?
She blinked those long lashes and turned away, headed for the living room. A new surge of alarm engulfed his entire body. Clutching the baby against his chest, he rushed after her. “Where are you going?”
“Home.”
“You can’t leave.”
She detoured for the couch and stopped by the over-stuffed bag next to the baby carrier. “I fed her and cha
nged her just before bringing her over, so you should be good for a couple hours. Your sister left you enough diapers and formula to get you through a day or two, but you’ll need to go shopping soon. The base for the carrier is out on your front porch.”
A picture of first base on a baseball diamond flashed in his mind. “The base?”
“To lock the carrier in your truck when you’re driving. It’s the law, for safety reasons. I can secure it in the back seat before I go, if you want.”
“No, I don’t want. I don’t want any of this.” Panic edged his words as the entire situation threatened to overwhelm him once more. He tried to catch her gaze, but she refused to look directly at him, so he raised his voice when she moved toward the door. “You can’t leave me alone with her.”
The baby jerked in his arms, and her face scrunched up before she let out a wail that scared the shit of him.
“What? What did I do?”
“Don’t yell, it scares her. Talk to her. Softly. And rock her. Gently.”
He stared at the crying baby, but couldn’t think of a thing to say. Rock her. That he could do. Stiff-legged, he moved from side to side. The intensity of the crying lowered a couple notches. The sound of his front door opening brought him to an abrupt halt, and he whipped his head up to see the messenger leaving.
“Nikki—Nicole.”
She closed the door on his panicked appeal. And why wouldn’t she? The infant in his arms wailed louder, and it wasn’t her problem. He desperately resumed the rocking motion that had worked a moment ago. His eardrums vibrated, and his head was beginning to pound in time with his racing heart. A glance out the window caught his neighbor’s front door closing.
Oh, my God, what the hell am I going to do?
He dropped his gaze to his niece’s face.
“Hi.”
Too loud. Softly.
“Hey, there...little girl,” he whispered. “It’s okay. Don’t cry...Ella. Please, don’t cry.”
He started a circuit around the living room, striving to obtain a comfortable rhythm, repeating the same plea about fifty more times as he wracked his brain for a solution. He’d only been in Pulaski for about three months, and while he liked the town well enough to buy a house for the first time in his life, he didn’t have any friends here.
Sure, he joked around with the guys at work, and some of them talked about their wives and kids, but that didn’t mean he was about to call one of them for help with the baby his sister had dumped on him.
His boss, Carter, the one guy he did feel comfortable enough to talk to, was separated from his wife and had no kids. Which left Sam exactly at square one.
A desperate glance at the muted football game told him it’d only been one quarter, but it felt like hours before the baby’s cries subsided to sniffles. Her eyes were red, cheeks wet, and clear boogers coated her upper lip. On his way to the bathroom for a wad of toilet paper, she lifted those little fists and wiped snot all over her face.
Gross.
In the bathroom, he grabbed a washcloth from the linen closet and wet it one-handed. Then he wiped her face, which started her screaming again. Moments later, her little body tensed, and a gurgling eruption sounded from the area where his hand supported her bottom.
His hand grew considerably warmer. And wet.
When the smell hit his nostrils and comprehension struck, it took about two seconds for his gag reflex to kick in.
Chapter 3
Nikki tossed the leftover piece of her pizza in the garbage as guilt continued to gnaw at her. She’d had to get out of Sam’s house before she never wanted to let that precious little girl go. And yeah, he’d pissed her off with the family services comment, but the expression of sheer terror on his face as she walked out replayed in her mind about every forty-five seconds—pretty much every time he made a circuit of his living room and passed the window.
Yeah, she was spying on purpose this time. From behind the curtain in her dark dining room, with her conscience for company.
Poor guy. He’d admitted to knowing nothing about babies, and she’d just left him, high and dry.
Worse, poor Ella. She needed her as much as Sam did.
Thirty-seven minutes after Nikki left, she stood on his porch again. She didn’t see him through the window, and when she didn’t hear Ella crying, she almost returned to her own place for good. Her neighbor’s family issues weren’t her problem.
Then a faint cry came through the door and reactivated her guilt. She thought about ringing the bell, but didn’t want to add to the baby’s distress. Discovering he hadn’t locked the door behind her earlier, she let herself in and followed the noise. Ella’s crying stopped once Nikki entered the hall, and she reached the bathroom in time to see Sam turn his head to the side as he gagged.
A putrid smell reached her nose, and she bit back a smile. “You going to make it?”
He whipped his head around at the sound of her voice. “Oh, thank God. No—take her. I’m gonna throw up.”
Ella ended up in her arms, and Nikki immediately discovered it was more than the smell freaking him out. The blanket was warm and squishy, and liquid soaked into her sleeve and the front of her sweater. Sam backed up, his horrified gaze dropping to his own wet shirt.
“You’ll get used to it...” She trailed off as he turned to dry-heave into the sink.
He reached up to strip his T-shirt off over his head. After tossing it into the tub, he yanked on the handle of the sink faucet to run the water full blast. Three full pumps of the soap dispenser seemed a bit overboard, but he slathered it all over his hands and arm before rinsing clean. Then he grabbed the wadded wash cloth sitting on the edge of the sink to swipe across his stomach.
“Ew,” he groaned. Grimacing, he threw the cloth into the tub with his shirt, then wet a new one and resumed scrubbing.
Nikki’s gaze fixed on his chest and abs. Oh, good Lord! He was attractive enough with a shirt on and stubble-covered jaw. All that bare skin and those jeans riding low on his lean hips shot the sexy to a whole ’nother level. Just the thought of reaching out to test the firmness of those slabs of defined muscles made her mouth go bone dry. Whatever his job was with those tools of his, physical labor had done one heck of a number on his body.
His gaze rose to hers as he reached to shut off the water, and she experienced the full effect of his striking brown eyes in the bright bathroom light. The gold flecks around his pupil gave them a bronze tone, set off all the more by dark lashes and dark brown hair. The word beautiful came to mind, but she doubted he’d appreciate that description.
“Get used to this?” he responded to her earlier comment. “I don’t think so.”
Ella squirmed and began to fuss again. Gathering her wits and reining in her hormones, Nikki shifted the baby in her arms. “Happens to me at least once a day at work, though I don’t usually end up wearing it.”
“Where the hell do you work?”
“At a daycare. Now, grab a couple towels and two wash cloths, and bring them to the dining room table. Your niece needs a bath and a clean diaper.”
In the dining room, she moved aside the boxes on the table with one hand until there was room for the towel. She had him fold it in half and spread it on the table, then laid the baby on the padded surface.
“There you go. Strip her down while I get a bowl of warm water.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you. I came back to give you a few lessons, not do it for you.”
She headed for the kitchen and started searching through his cupboards before he could argue. The emptiness surprised her, even though he’d only moved in a week ago. From what she’d seen in the dining room, the few boxes he had left to unpack were not marked kitchen, and there were no others stacked around the sparse, neat house.
Instead of a bowl, she had to settle for a big metal pot. By the time she filled and carried it over, he’d managed to remove Ella’s one-piece sleeper, leaving her in just her dirty, overflowing diaper. Nikki hid a smi
le when he turned his head to the side, eyes scrunched tight as his Adam’s apple jerked up and down with a hard swallow.
Once she retrieved wipes, a diaper, and clean clothes from the bag his sister had left, she joined him at the table. “Tomorrow you’ll want to pick up a mat for the bathtub, but for tonight, this’ll have to do.”
“Shouldn’t we be doing this in the tub now? I’m never going to be able to eat at this table again.”
She laughed. “You’ll be fine. We’re out here to give you plenty of room to work. Now, first thing you want to do is check the water temperature. Either dip your elbow in, or drip some on the inside of your wrist. If it’s too hot for you, it’s too hot for Ella. And on the flip side, you don’t want it too cool because it will give her the chills.”
“Didn’t you already check it?”
“Yes, but you should, too.”
He leaned over and submerged his elbow. “Feels fine.”
“Good. Now, undo the diaper and use the front to wipe her as much as you can.”
“Ah…” Sam turned a pleading look her way. “Can’t you just show me?”
Nikki shook her head. “Hands on learning is the best way.”
He started to reach for the baby, then stopped and flipped his palms up. “My hands are really rough.”
Her skin tingled at the thought of those rough hands touching her. She wouldn’t mind one bit.
Stop it!
“You’re wiping with the diaper, not your hands. You’ll be fine.”
With a resigned sigh, he did as instructed. His gag reflex seemed to have been so overwhelmed, it’d now completely given up. Then she realized he was holding his breath.
“You’re gonna want to breathe at some point,” she teased.
He released his breath with a sheepish smile. Damn, the man was hot even while wiping poop off a baby’s butt.
She took the diaper and continued with her directions. “Pick her up under the arms, spreading your fingers so they support the base of her neck, then lift and dip her into the pot so I can rinse her.”
With Ella’s bottom half in the water, Nikki moved in close to rinse off the worst of the poop. Her shoulder rested against Sam’s bare one, and she couldn’t help but notice the heat emanating from his body. Beneath the baby smells, she caught a trace of a man who’d worked all day in the fresh outdoors.
Autumn Wish Page 2