by Krista Davis
I knew which one. I shuddered at the memory of that cupcake pillow with black marks on one side and frosting on the other. The black smears had probably come from Muffin’s eye makeup, and the frosting must have oozed out of the icing bag in her hand.
“She had bruises on her arms and head, most likely from her assailant.”
“Poor Muffin!”
“Did Humphrey and Leon show you Martha’s trick with the ball this morning?”
I might have known they would show off to Nina. “What do you think? Is it possible that she picked up the expensive cupcake and ran with it?”
“Stranger things have happened. Some birds collect shiny things and hoard them in their nests.”
My thoughts shifted to Humphrey. “How on earth did Humphrey get mixed up in a murder?”
Nina frowned at me. “You insisted Humphrey wasn’t involved in Muffin’s murder. Now you think there’s a connection?”
“I don’t know. So many weird things have happened. First Renee and Joy split up, then Muffin was murdered. Those are facts. It seems likely that Renee and Joy are the primary suspects in Muffin’s death. Right?”
She nodded.
“Then Buddy was stolen. Maurice clearly wanted Buddy to spite Spenser. It seems pretty clear that Maurice was the culprit there. I can’t imagine any way that Buddy’s disappearance could be linked to Muffin’s murder. Finally, Humphrey was arrested—”
“You’re jumping ahead,” she said. “You forgot about Joy’s claim that someone pricked her and set up a wire to trip her. And the general!”
“He seems to be suffering from some genetic illness. An allergy to fava beans.”
“Genetic? Does that mean oh-be-still-my-heart Alex has it, too?”
“Apparently so. And Nick, as well. But it doesn’t sound too bad. As long as they don’t eat fava beans or other broad beans they’re fine. From Alex’s description I’m under the impression that it’s mostly a cumulative thing. If they eat them once, they feel sick, but usually get over it. It’s when they eat the beans continuously that they become very ill, like the general did.”
“I wouldn’t let that get out if I were Nick. Listening to Myra and Joy last night, I gather there’s more than one woman in Old Town who’d like to knock him off.”
“And for good reason. What a crumb to use women that way. Poor Joy! She opened her shop again, did you see?”
“It’s exciting. I’m so glad for her.”
“None of the incidents seem related.” I paused so Daisy could sniff a gate. “But Spenser was tangentially involved in two of them. He wasn’t home during the burglary, but it was his home that was invaded. And Spenser was the one who really lost Buddy because Buddy would have been his dog.”
I gasped, alarming people who were walking by us. Smiling, I assured them everything was fine, and we strolled away.
“Both of the thefts involved taking things from Spenser. And who wanted to have Spenser’s possessions? Maurice! Of course. He must be the one who broke into Spenser’s home. But why would he have brought the gold cupcake to the gala dinner? He needed money. Wouldn’t he have sold it?”
“Maybe he couldn’t sell it because it was so easily identifiable. It was too hot. Or maybe he didn’t think it was real. Maybe he thought it was a cheap bauble.”
“Still, why would he bring it to the dinner? Unless . . . unless he wanted to taunt Spenser with it somehow.”
Nina shook her head. “But then Spenser would know who the burglar was. Oh! I see what you mean. He might have placed it on a seat in the commotion, or dropped it in Spenser’s pocket or something to spook him.”
“Or to spook Clarissa,” I suggested. “I had no idea she was so high-strung. Renee said Clarissa was never the same after the burglary. She would have jumped right out of her skin if that cupcake had turned up unexpectedly.”
“You don’t think Spenser could have been behind the burglary? Maybe he set it up to happen when he would have an alibi?”
“You’ve been watching too many movies.” I laughed. “But something is definitely wrong with Clarissa. I always thought she was nice, but she’s acting so odd.”
We reached the waterfront and sat on one of the benches overlooking the Potomac River.
“Do you think Joy’s safe now?” I asked. “Or will Nick still come after her, even though she’s moving out?”
“I don’t think it was Nick who strung the wire to trip her. Think about it,” said Nina. “He got what he wanted. He took her money, and now he’s getting rid of her. He’s free to do as he likes and move on—to another woman to rip off.”
“So why bother killing her? Is that what you mean?”
“Exactly. I think someone else has it in for her.”
“And once again, we’re back to Renee. Why does everything seem to revolve around Renee, Maurice, and Spenser?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Dear Natasha,
How come Sophie gives so much advice about dogs and cats, and all you talk about is cupcakes?
—Animal Lover in Puposky, Minnesota
Dear Animal Lover,
Sophie may dispense advice, but I can tell you how to make a canopy bed for your little doggie princess! All you have to do is cut and glue lightweight PVC to form the legs and top, and then attach a ruffled canopy! Of course, a real princess deserves a little bling, so have fun with the glue gun and rhinestones.
—Natasha
“And Joy. Don’t forget Joy.” Nina frowned at me. “What’s bugging you?”
I told her about the meeting where I’d been ushered to the door after Clarissa accused me of having an affair with Spenser. “So then I went to The Laughing Hound, and Moe confessed to spreading it around as idle gossip.”
“Wait until Bernie hears! Is Moe still on probation? He’ll lose his job. Why would Moe make up something like that about you?”
“Don’t tell Bernie. Right or wrong, we all share rumors. Moe heard it from Maurice and then repeated it. Why would Maurice pick on me? I know he hates Spenser, but it’s a bald lie, and why involve me?”
“Ugh. I always thought Maurice was peculiar, but I’m coming to despise the man. He fabricates everything. Why lie about his cat, Gunsmoke, being a girl? Maybe the man can’t tell the truth. He probably wanted to spread an ugly lie about Spenser, and you were the hapless victim.”
“That’s just hateful. If Spenser and I had been seen together around town or if there were any basis for it whatsoever, it still wouldn’t be right or nice of Maurice, but this is just vicious. It’s bad enough that he’s so ugly to Spenser, but to spread this kind of callous rumor is just plain mean. It could result in all kinds of unanticipated repercussions.”
“Maybe that’s what he wanted—to cause a specific consequence.”
I turned my head to look at her. “What do you mean?”
“Maybe Maurice hoped that spreading an ugly rumor tying Spenser to someone else would cause a rift between Spenser and Clarissa.” She raised her eyebrows and grimaced. “Looks like it worked.”
“But why? Why would he want to do that?” I knew the answer before I’d finished the question. “He sees it as vengeance. Spenser said it days ago. Maurice blames his misfortune on Spenser.”
“Poor Spenser!” said Nina. “Remember how Maurice wanted Buddy? He wants to deny Spenser happiness.” She shook her head. “I bet he wants Spenser to lose everything, just like he did. How low can a person be?”
We strolled back leisurely, until Humphrey crossed a street in front of us, so agitated that he didn’t notice us. His cell phone played a jingle, and he jerked like someone had slapped him. He pulled it from his pocket, looked at it in terror, and tossed it into the trash can on the corner.
“What on earth?” Nina picked up her pace.
I stopped and peered into the trash. Fortunately, it was full and the phone had landed on a discarded fast-food bag. I picked it up.
“Come on!” Nina waited for me. “Eww. What are you doing? That�
�s gross.”
“He didn’t mean to throw it away. Do you know how much information is probably in here?”
“I’m not touching it.” She stuck out her tongue.
Humphrey disappeared into a beer bar.
Nina grabbed Daisy’s leash from me. “Hurry! Go after him. He’s in some kind of trouble.”
I tried to hand her his phone. For what seemed an eternity, she backed away from it.
“For pity’s sake, Nina. Just take it!”
She grasped the corner with the tips of her thumb and forefinger, making a face of disgust.
I stepped inside the tavern, and stopped dead so my eyes could adjust to the dark interior. Paneled walls and few windows made for a cozy atmosphere. Labored breathing to my left turned out to be from Humphrey, who stood with his back to the wall.
“Are you hiding from someone?” I asked.
“Depends. Who sent you?”
“No one. Nina and I saw you throw your phone in the trash.”
“Would you believe I need a new one?”
“No.”
“I need a new number. The wrong people have the old number.”
“Are you in some kind of trouble?”
“If I buy you dinner, will you protect me?”
“Nina is outside with Daisy. I think they permit dogs on the patio in the back. Is that okay?”
“The farther back the better!”
I switched places with Nina. She went inside with Humphrey, and I walked Daisy around the corner to the unofficial doggie entrance. Ivy climbed the fence that enclosed the patio. Tables with green and white umbrellas were already crowded, but Nina and Humphrey had managed to snag a table under a tree.
Before I sat down, a waitress appeared and took our order. Medium-rare burgers for everyone, including Daisy. She passed on the beer, though.
I leaned forward to talk so the other diners wouldn’t overhear. “What’s going on?”
“They’re tormenting me.”
“Who?” asked Nina.
“Renee, Joy, and Myra. Renee calls me in desperate need of help. ‘I have to go to the bank. Can you come mind the store?’ But Joy sees me when I go to Sugar Baby, and before I know it, Myra has some kind of emergency. Then Joy calls. ‘Can you pick up some bananas at the market and bring them over here?’ Then Renee sees me at Sugar Mama and gets bent out of shape. The calls and the texts never stop.” His voice rose. “Even at night. They text me in the middle of the night. Even when I was in jail! Don’t they ever sleep? I can’t get a moment’s rest!”
He’d become so loud that other patrons were staring at us.
A sly smile crept onto Nina’s face. “I thought you were in love with Renee.”
“She is rapidly drowning my undying devotion. If this is what a relationship with Renee is like, then I shall be forced to reconsider my position.”
“Humphrey, you’re caught in the middle of their cupcake war.”
“You mean I’m simply a pawn to them?” His crestfallen face tugged at my heart.
“They wouldn’t fight over you if they didn’t care about you.” That wasn’t completely true, but maybe it would help soften the blow.
“They can find another pawn, then. I’m done. What a shame I lost my cell phone. After dinner, I’m going home and turning the ringer off on my land line. They’d better not come looking for me.” He lifted an eyebrow. “Is this one of the games women play that I’ve heard so much about?”
“I guess it is. You’re caught in the middle.” Nina drank from a pilsner glass.
He rubbed his hands together. “In that case, they’d better be careful, because this exhausted mouse might just turn the tables on them.”
Nina nudged me. Across the patio, the general and Nick had just sat down at a table. Alex was headed toward us.
“Hope I’m not interrupting,” he said.
“Never,” breathed Nina, gazing at him like he was a movie star.
“It’s good to see the general out and about. He looks great. Have you met Humphrey?” I introduced them.
“Sophie,” said Alex, “would you meet me for a drink or dessert later? I’d like to discuss something with you.”
“I’d love t—”
Shirley Morgan, who’d been so instrumental in spreading the dreadful rumor about Spenser and me, walked up behind Alex and interrupted.
“Alex, darlin’, it was fate that you happened to be here! I’d like you to marr . . . meet my daughter, Sam. Isn’t she gorgeous? Sweetheart,” she said to Sam, “this is Alex. He’s a lawyer from a very fine family.”
Sam had the slim build of a runner and had to be six feet tall. Her clothes clung to her, showing off her trim figure. A person could bounce a quarter off those abs if she were lying down. She wore her hair cut super short, like a young boy. No makeup, but she didn’t need it. A no-maintenance beauty. But I found it curious that her mother was pushing her on Alex, who had to be closer to her mother’s age.
They politely shook hands. Shirley trilled, “Look at the two of you. I will have beautiful grandchildren.”
Shirley elbowed me, and whispered, “She better snag that man before he moves to town and every single woman, and probably some of the married ones, chase him.” She gazed at Nina and Humphrey. “I don’t see Spenser. Isn’t he here with you?”
What did it take to convince this woman that I wasn’t seeing him?
Dramatically pretending she’d been bad, she cringed and held a finger up to her lips. “Sorry. I forget that it’s a secret.” She winked at me.
To my immense relief, Alex excused himself and returned to his own table.
Shirley wrinkled her nose at me. “He’s so adorable. Don’t you just want to jump him and smother him with kisses?” She walked away, fanning herself with her hand.
I tried to concentrate on Humphrey and his woman problems, but it wasn’t easy. As inconspicuously as possible, I pivoted my chair so that Alex wouldn’t be in my line of sight, but the mere knowledge that he was there distracted me. I could barely choke down half of my burger. Fortunately, Daisy was more than happy to eat the remainder of mine, along with her own.
A couple of hours later, I had changed into a soft peach dress that flowed and always made me feel very feminine. I’d packed more makeup on my black eye, and tried to curl my hair the way Kayla, the Realtor, wore hers. It flopped in multiple directions, not exactly what I’d intended, but it could have been worse.
When the door knocker sounded, I smoothed my dress and took a deep breath. “Ready, Daisy? Best behavior, please.” I opened the front door and found myself face-to-face with Natasha—who was flirting shamelessly with Alex!
“Look who I found on your doorstep,” she trilled, walking into my foyer.
“Hello, Alex. What can I do for you, Natasha?” I had to get rid of her before she invited herself along.
She bustled into my kitchen. Alex and I followed her.
Natasha eyed me critically. “Did we wake you up? You look like you just rolled out of bed.”
Not exactly the impression I had hoped to make.
“Where do you keep Daisy’s things?” she asked.
“Things?”
“Her wardrobe.”
It was all I could do to keep from laughing. “She doesn’t wear clothes.”
Natasha gasped. “What about booties?”
“She doesn’t wear those, either.”
“What kind of dog mother are you?”
“That’s pretty funny coming from you.” It slipped out of my mouth, even though I didn’t want to be catty in front of Alex. I had to get rid of her. “Maybe we could do this some other time?”
She nodded and sat down.
Tilting my head, I glared at her and tried to send a message with my eyes.
Flashing me an annoyed look, she said, “Alex, since Sophie doesn’t have time for us right now, why don’t you come down to my house? You really ought to meet Mars.” She rose, brushed past me, and whispered, “So the rumors
about you and Spenser are true!”
“I would enjoy meeting Mars,” said Alex. “Maybe some other time? I’m here to pick up Sophie.”
“Is something wrong with your car?” she asked me.
I tried not to speak through clenched teeth. “It’s a date, Natasha.”
Her forehead creased between her eyes. “Wh . . . oh, I get it, you’re joking. Very funny.”
I didn’t want to hear more. “I’ll tell you all about Daisy’s wardrobe another time. Okay?”
“But you just said—”
Gently taking her hand, I led her to the foyer door. “Goodnight, Natasha.”
I closed it before she could protest, smoothed my dress, and returned to the kitchen. “Sorry about that.”
He held out his hand to me. I placed my hand in his, unsure about his intentions.
His fingers gently caressed my neck. Before I knew it, he’d mesmerized me and cupped my face between his hands. But just as his lips brushed mine, my kitchen door slammed open.
“Aha! I finally—” Clarissa stared at us. Her original shout faded to a murmur. “—caught you.” She tweaked the bridge of her nose. “I don’t understand. Have you dumped Spenser? Not that I would blame you. I would dump him for someone who looks like this guy, too.”
“Alex,” I said, “this is Clarissa.”
He stepped forward and shook her hand. “Spenser? The guy from Cake My Day?”
“Her husband.”
He assessed me with a disturbed expression. “You’re in the habit of kissing her husband?”
I said, “No,” at exactly the same time that she said, “Yes.”
I rolled my eyes toward the ceiling. There was no telling what she might say next. Facing Alex, I locked on to his eyes. I wanted him to realize I wasn’t lying, and I had nothing to hide. I couldn’t read much in his expression, but I sensed caution. “I am not having an affair with Spenser, and I never have. As far as I can tell, a wacky guy started this rumor, and it spread like crazy.”
A crease formed between Alex’s eyes. “What wacky guy? Why would he do that?”
“Maurice Lester. You might have noticed him at the cupcake feast. Stringy white hair. He was carrying a cat who was wearing a pink wig?”