by Lisa Patton
“I suppose that’s best.” She turns to me. “I told Haynes on the way down, I can’t leave here today without seeing that gorgeous dorm room.”
I give her the evil eye behind Haynes’s back. She shoots me one in return.
“That’s one of your mother’s missions for the day,” Haynes says, chuckling. “I wouldn’t tell her how much it cost. I didn’t want her passing out in my truck.”
I swallow, and calmly change the subject—not daring to meet Mama’s eye. “Honey, maybe you should go on over to the Grove. I got a text from Ellie right before I got here. She’s on the way there.” I push him on the shoulder, in an attempt to get him away from Mama.
“Trying to get rid of me?”
“No. I just know it will take you a minute to find her. Thousands of people are over there already.”
“I can’t wait to surprise her.” He leans in for a kiss. “I’ll call you as soon as I know something. Keep your phone handy.”
“It will never leave my hand,” I say, waving it in the air.
As soon as he’s out of earshot I glare at Mama. “Why did you have to bring up the dorm room? You know I’ll take you over there. Please leave Haynes out of it.”
“Ohhh,” she moans like a hospital patient. “You are wearing me out with this deception. Let’s go ahead and tell him. He won’t mind. Especially in light of who Ellie has for a roommate.”
“Don’t you know Haynes by now? He couldn’t care less about that. I am not telling him.”
“Spare me the details.” She sighs. “Can you show me to the powdah room, please? I’d like to check my lipstick before I meet Mrs. Whitmoah.”
Once she passes in front of me, I roll my eyes.
To get into the House we have to pass under a blue-and-white balloon arch over the walkway. Someone has turned up the volume on the rap music and it’s honestly enough to make me turn back around. But I have to say, despite the razor-thin odds, if Ellie happens to pledge Alpha Delt instead of Tri Delt, the rap and this nightmare of a week will be well worth it.
Mama has to back away to let more members through. I see her jerk her palms up as if she’s afraid of getting knocked down. After they pass she lifts her chin and adjusts her posture. “They’re packing them in like sahdines these days.”
“It’s not like it used to be.” The last thing I need is for her to fall, so I stretch an arm around her back and lead her through the front door.
While we’re making our way toward the powder room I see her eyeing my hair. “Have I told you about my new hairdress’ah?”
“You’ve switched? I’m shocked. You’ve been going to Robert as long as I can remember.”
“I was exhausted from hearing about his sexual escapades. At first I thought it was humorous, I even egged him on, but after thirty years I’m starting to wond’ah if he’s actually a porn star in disguise.”
I stop. “Mama. Ew.” This is not a subject I fancy speaking about with her.
She lifts her chin. “Tell me about it. That’s why I switched to Brandon. He’s young and cutting edge.” She sighs. “He’s gay, too, but aren’t they all?”
Another mom is leaving the powder room. She holds the door for us as we step through. When Mama is in front of the mirror she stops. “Wouldn’t you agree my hair is the best it’s ever looked?” She lifts one side with her palm. “Brandon. Gould’s in the mall. You should give him a call.”
“Thanks, but no thanks,” I say while looking at her in the mirror. “I have no desire to get my color done in front of a big mall window with everybody in Memphis walking past. A woman wearing a black plastic poncho with purple cream on her scalp is not an attractive look.”
“Well. Don’t say I didn’t try.” She inspects my hair once more before stepping inside the stall. I hear the latch click. “You’re due for a new ’do.”
FORTY-FOUR
CALI
If anyone could feel the pirouettes the butterflies are making inside my stomach right now, I think they might feel like they were about to see Jesus in person or at the very least take a walk on the moon. Am I really sitting here in the most beautiful grove in the country, with veins of yellow and red just beginning to spread onto the leaves?
Am I truly in the middle of two thousand pedigreed girls, listening to the president of Panhellenic welcome us all from the stage? There is breath moving in and out of my lungs and a pulse on my wrist, so this must be real. Maybe this is my first step toward becoming Mississippi’s first lady governor.
I hate that I can’t see Ellie. Her Gamma Chi Group is on the total opposite side of the stage. But this time we have a plan. As soon as we open our bid cards we are going to meet at the back of the last row of seats before we make the grand dash to our new Houses.
Even though I haven’t the slightest idea which sorority has invited me to become a new member, Ellie knows for certain she will either be an Alpha Delt or a Tri Delt. She said it was the hardest decision of her life. After sitting in the ranking room for two hours after Pref last night she finally put Tri Delt first, although she really doesn’t care which one she joins. Technically, I’m not supposed to know. Keeping our choices a secret is one of the Panhellenic rules. As much as I want to be in the same sorority with her, I have resigned myself that it’s not going to happen.
I feel a tap on my shoulder, then someone whispering in my ear. “Cali, hey.”
After whipping around in my chair, I see a girl I met at freshman orientation last summer. And she’s sitting right behind me. “Mary Gaston!”
“I can’t believe I’m just now seeing you,” she whispers. “After all these months.” She starts to say something else, but the Gamma Chis are dancing onto the stage for their big Reveal. Finally, we get to learn to which sorority each of them belongs.
I pat her on the hand and whisper back, “We’ll talk in a sec.”
Someone onstage yells, “Kappa Alpha Theta.” Then all the one hundred Gamma Chis—it looks like there are at least that many—sing the entire Theta song, clapping and dancing like they’re all Theta sisters. Most of the rushees around me aren’t all that interested in the Reveal, but I’m super interested and I’m inspecting every girl up there, dying to spot Sarah.
When the song is over, about ten Gamma Chis break from the group, run to the front of the stage, and rip off their T-shirts to reveal their Theta jerseys underneath. Sarah is not one of them.
Next up is the AOPi song and like before, once the song ends, the real AOPi’s run to the front, remove their Gamma Chi T-shirts, and strip down to their AOPi jerseys. ADPi follows. My eyes are hurting from focusing this hard. I’ve been insanely curious for over a week now, imagining which sorority Sarah actually belongs to. The same routine goes on for another three sororities, and still no Sarah.
When the Alpha Delts begin their song, I remember it right away. Having made it all the way through Sisterhood there, I’d heard them sing it for their door stacks. It’s super catchy and I find myself singing along. When it ends and their Gamma Chis are bopping up to the front of the pack, I think I see Sarah. Wait … it is Sarah! She’s an Alpha Delt? Oh my goodness, Sarah, you’re an Alpha Delt? I’m so happy for Ellie right now I can’t breathe. They could be sorority sisters.
When the Reveal is over, while the Gamma Chis are walking off the stage and heading back toward their groups, the Panhellenic president strolls onto the stage again. By the way everyone is screaming you’d think Ole Miss had won the National Championship. And she’s taking her sweet time. Come on, girl, we’re all dying here.
“Now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for,” she finally says into the mic. All the girls scream louder—if that’s possible.
“Listen up,” she yells, over all of our voices. “Once all the Gamma Chis get back to their groups they’ll be handing out your bid cards. Do not open them. Wait till your Gamma Chi tells you to do so.”
Parents and grandparents, sisters and brothers—and college boys galore—are all over the Grove,
sneaking in closer to get a better view. After learning I’d been cut from Rush, I told my grandparents I wouldn’t be joining a sorority. I’m not sure which was worse, Papaw’s tears or mine. I never thought of calling them back this morning to tell them otherwise. Dammit, I wish they could be here.
Now I see Sarah rushing back to our group, waving our bid cards over her head. She’s wide-eyed and she can’t contain her smile. I’m dying to tell her that Ellie is my best friend and to watch out for her at Alpha Delt, in case she joins, but there’s too much excitement going on.
“Keep these in your hands,” she says, while handing us our small white envelopes. By the way she’s bouncing it seems she’s as pumped as we are. “I want y’all to open them at the same time.” Then she spreads out her arms and motions us to huddle in closer.
I’m staring at my envelope. The paper is thin and, if I really wanted to, I could press down hard enough to read the lettering. But I’ve come this far, waited this long, and I am not about to ruin my own surprise. Besides, I couldn’t care less which sorority’s name is inside. All I know is this might be the happiest moment of my life. I sure can’t think of another one any better. Truly, I feel as though I might burst at any second.
Sarah seems the same way—buoyant and electric—and now she has to yell because other groups have opened their bid cards and girls are already screaming. “Here we go: five, four, three, two, one. Open!”
Everyone in my group is ripping into their envelopes, but my hands are shaking so hard I can’t. Now they’re all screaming and jumping. Some are already running. And I’m still trying to slip my damn finger underneath the flap of my envelope. My heart is literally pounding like it’s trapped and begging to get out of my chest. Finally, I tear off a corner and rip the envelope in half. Once I’m able to pull out the card and see what’s written, my jaw hits the ground. I suck in a pound of air and gasp. Then I blink about five times, certain there’s been a mistake.
ALPHA DELTA BETA
CORDIALLY INVITES
CALI WATKINS
TO BECOME A NEW MEMBER OF
SIGMA MU CHAPTER
UNIVERSITY OF MISSISSIPPI
I’m staring at my bid card in shock. Everyone in the Grove is screaming. But my mouth won’t move. I can’t make a sound. Tears spring to my eyes. When Sarah said I was a new member I never considered it would be Alpha Delt. Never-in-my-wildest-dreams never.
“Hold up your bid card, Cali.” I look up and Sarah’s directly in front of me, holding her phone at eye level. How long she’s been videoing is anyone’s guess. “Had you fooled, didn’t I?” She keeps going until I practically knock her down for a hug. “You deserve every bit of this,” she says in my ear, then pulls away. “When I told you everyone was excited about you, I knew what I was talking about. Every single girl at Alpha Delt loves you. If it hadn’t been for variable quota none of that craziness would have happened. Now, run!”
When I look around, I’m one of only a few girls still left in the Grove. I rush out to the end of the row, pushing over one, then two chairs trying to get to Ellie. But when I make it to the place where we both agreed to meet, she’s not there. I’m too late.
So I run. Run like a track star, out of the Grove, past the Union, and down Sorority Row toward the Alpha Delt House. My adrenaline is roaring—I’ve never felt anything like it. Hundreds of boys are lined up on both sides of the street watching, and when I pass I look several of them in the eye with pride. Like I’m this new person, an adult peacock, well, actually a peahen, who has suddenly broken out of a shame shell that had bound and crippled her fan feathers far too long. When I pass the Tri Delt House I look for Ellie, but it’s no use. Their crowd is enormous, spilling into the street.
I can see the Alpha Delt House in the distance so I race faster, remembering my cross-country days when I could see the finish line. When I finally make it to the curb, completely out of breath, the members are dressed in adorable costumes, lined up and holding hands across the front walkway—underneath a balloon arch—to form a human tunnel. More than likely, I’m the last one here, I think, so I take my place in line behind other new members. When it’s my turn, I duck and run. Girls are cheering as I move through, patting me on the shoulder. I am free. I am alive. I am home!
At the end of the tunnel Sarah is waiting for me. She must have run as fast as I did to get here. She pulls me aside and slips a white Alpha Delta Beta jersey over my head, then hands me a much-needed bottle of water. After wrapping a ribbon name tag necklace around my neck, she squeezes the life out of me, then the two of us drain our water bottles.
After swallowing the last sip, I look around the yard. “This day seems surreal, Sarah. When will it all sink in?”
“Maybe by the time you graduate,” she says, flicking her eyebrows.
There’s fun music blasting and a giant crowd in the yard so it’s hard to move around. Girls I don’t even know are hugging me. When one of them grabs me, I happen to look out over her shoulder and lock eyes with a familiar face. It’s Annie Laurie. Her mother and father are on either side of her, and she’s holding an enormous arm bouquet of white roses. It’s bigger than she is. Seriously, it seems like there are one hundred roses nestled in the crook of her arm. She acts surprised to see me, but still rushes over and offers a ceremonious hug.
“We’re sisters,” I say, careful not to squish her flowers.
“I’m so excited.” I think she says that, but between the music and the screams it’s hard to know for sure.
“Have you seen Ellie?”
“She went Tri Delt.” Someone pulls her away and then another girl grabs me. I can tell she’s one of my new pledge sisters by her name tag. I’d seen her at Martin, but we’d never met.
“I’m Becca Billings,” she says.
“I’m Cali Watkins. Nice to meet you.”
“Are you as happy as I am right now?” Her dimples and her big brown eyes are welcoming. I like her right away.
“Maybe happier. I was … I didn’t think this would ever happen.”
“Where are you from?” she asks.
“Blue Mountain, how about you?”
“Jackson. Well, actually Madison County. And I know what you mean. After hearing about variable quota I never thought I’d be here right now. But thank God I am!” She balls her hands into fists and raises them over her head.
Sarah, whom I thought I had lost in the crowd, hands both of us blue-and-white Popsicles. After introducing herself to Becca she huddles us in closer so we can hear her better. “Y’all are gonna meet so many people today, you’ll think your heads are exploding.”
“I can’t wait to meet all the girls in our pledge cla—” I spot Mrs. Woodcock a few feet away with her arm around a girl who looks just like … oh my God. Ellie.
FORTY-FIVE
CALI
I dash over and tap Ellie on the shoulder. When she turns around her look of sheer shock, mixed with over-the-top glee, is worth every second of the pain I’ve been through to get here. “Wha—what?” She bounces from one foot to the other, then grabs the sides of her head. “No freaking way!” She flings her arms around my neck and we dance in circles.
“I thought you went Tri Delt.”
“I didn’t get it. And now I know why.” We pull apart from each other, but keep holding hands. She turns to her mother. “Mom? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“And spoil the surprise?” Mrs. Woodcock reaches out and scoops me in her arms. “Cali. You have no idea how happy I am to see you on this lawn. Welcome home, sweetheart.”
“Thank you, thank you so much. It truly does feel like I’m home.” I’m hoarse. And hot. So I hold up my hair, fan the back of my neck. If only I had a ponytail holder.
“This is my dad and my grandmother,” Ellie says, motioning to the two of them. “Cali’s my next-door neighbor at Martin, my best friend on campus, and now my sorority sister.”
We hug again, and nearly trip over the person behind us. “Sorry,” I say, t
urning around, to a man who doesn’t seem to mind.
Mr. Woodcock draws me in for a hug, too. “Well, Cali, I’ve heard a lot of great things about you, young lady.”
“Thank you, likewise. Ellie talks about y’all all the time. And I’m sorry about not getting to the game a few weeks ago.” I’m still embarrassed by this. Leaving them with an empty seat.
He swipes away my apology. “It’s perfectly fine. No need to apologize.”
“I’m Mrs. Dyson, Ellie’s grandmothah. It’s lovely to meet you, Cali.” She extends her hand and I’m not all that sure of the carat weight, but there’s a whopper of a sapphire on one of her fingers, and it’s surrounded with diamonds.
“Thank you, Mrs. Dyson,” I say. “It’s lovely to meet you, too.”
Mr. Woodcock runs his fingers through his thick hair. “Ellie tells me you’re from Blue Mountain.”
“Yes, sir. I’ve lived there all my life.”
“Childhood home of Amanda Wingfield,” Mrs. Dyson says.
My mouth falls open at the mention of Amanda. “Yes, ma’am. She’s one of my favorite literary characters.”
Mrs. Dyson looks surprised. “So you’re familiah with Tennessee Williams?”
“Oh yes, ma’am. I’ve read The Glass Menagerie so many times I can practically recite it by heart.” What a coincidence. Ellie’s grandmother loves Tennessee Williams, too.
Mrs. Woodcock cuts her eyes at her mother, places a hand on my shoulder. “Cali, by the way, is a genius.”
I hold my hands up. “Oh no, ma’am, far from it. But that’s a nice compliment. Thank you.”
“I hope you don’t mind me bragging on you.” Ellie’s mom turns to the others. “Cali made a thirty-two on her ACT.”
I cringe. It’s not something I want made public.
“Wow,” her dad says, leaning forward. “Ever thought of going into law?”
“Actually,” I say with a winsome smile, “I have. Then I want to be governor.”