Forever Blue

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Forever Blue Page 17

by Jennifer Edlund


  “Tell her the forks should be on the right side of the table. A woman of the world should know these things,” I overhead Evelyn mention to Scotty while I was in the kitchen. Her criticism was demeaning and beyond irritating.

  I managed to sit down after the salads were served, and during this time, I took the opportunity to make nice with Scotty’s sisters

  “So, Elizabeth, do you have a boyfriend?” I asked. She was quiet beautiful with high cheek bones, full parted lips, and long dyed platinum-blonde hair. In stature, Elizabeth was tall and slender, but also well portioned and graceful.

  She smiled at my question and answered, “I do. His name is Tommy.”

  “Tommy who has no job and still lives with his mother,” Evelyn cut in.

  “Mom, I told you he just got laid off,” Elizabeth retorted with a roll of her eyes.

  “So how did you and Scotty meet?” Jaime asked.

  She was almost the spitting image of Scotty with her olive complexion and deep set brown eyes. Jaime was also the most well-endowed of the two sisters, and slightly on the heavier side. Her black pixie hairstyle gave her a punk rocker appearance.

  “I was working at a clothing store, and he was actually shopping for your mother’s birthday present. I helped him pick out a few things. The next thing I knew, he started coming in every day.”

  “You mean that brown sun-dress you bought Evelyn not too long ago?” Jim asked Scotty.

  “Yes, that’s the one,” Scotty replied.

  “You picked that out?” Evelyn asked, looking directly at me. “Hmm—surprising.”

  “Yes, so anyway…I only came in to see her,” Scotty said, gazing at me dotingly.

  Elizabeth chuckled. “Scotty, you’re such a nerd.”

  “Your brother has helped me through some really rough patches in my life.” I took a sip of wine and felt everyone’s stare boring into me as if they were almost silently demanding further explanation.

  Jim shot me a sad, sympathetic half-smile and said, “I’m so terribly sorry about your mother.”

  “Well, I don’t think I would have made it through if Scotty wasn’t in my life,” I said, squeezing his hand.

  I was able to relax a bit more when dinner was officially served. The main course was an ode to my mother, and I was anxious to know what everyone thought.

  “So what do you think?” I asked Scotty.

  “It’s amazing, kid.”

  “Perfecto,” Jim said with a wink.

  Both Elizabeth and Jaime nodded in approval.

  “For me particularly, I find it a wee bit salty.” Evelyn pushed the plate away with her fingertips. “And I’m very sensitive to salt, dear. You don’t want me swelling up like a balloon now do you?”

  I didn’t know what to say other than, “Of course not.”

  “Then maybe you might have some of that jarred pasta sauce on hand?” she asked. “That will do, I suppose.”

  Another blow to my ego. Strike two. “Sure. I’ll make you another plate.”

  I walked into the kitchen feeling like I was kicked in the face. Per her request, I grabbed a jar of Ragu from the cupboard. I wanted to smash it into a million pieces and leave the shards of broken glass in her meal. I thought of this evil plan while scraping Evelyn’s pasta into the sink and down the garbage disposal.

  During my short-lived emotional upheaval and homicidal fantasies, Scotty came up behind me. He placed his hands on my shoulders. “Hey,” he said. “Are you all right?”

  He had to be kidding. I turned around and gawked at him. “Are you blind?”

  Scotty furrowed his brow as if puzzled. “Why are you acting so uptight?”

  “Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe because your mother doesn’t like me very much,” I whispered.

  “Sure she does. Look, sometimes she can be a bit anal about things, but don’t take it personally. It’s just the way she is.”

  I shook my head and turned away, silently disagreeing with him. The situation was more trouble than it was worth. I was really in no mood for an argument. “Okay, fine. If you say so.”

  Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, Evelyn grilled me in the middle of dinner. She looked up from her untouched plate of pasta and asked, “So, dear, what university did you graduate from?”

  “Well, after my dad died, my life kind of went in another direction, so I didn’t go to college.”

  “Oh I see.” Her eyes fluttered open only to reveal doubt. “And where has this road we call life led you?” She then looked directly at Scotty. It was almost as though she was assessing him and trying to figure out why he had stooped so low to be with me.

  “To makeup artistry school,” I said, feeling the conversation heading in the wrong direction.

  Jaime lit up like a bulb. “I’ve always wanted to do makeup. What’s it like?”

  “I’m on a paid internship. Soon I’ll be working on movie sets and runways.”

  “Have you met any celebrities?” Elizabeth asked as she took a dainty sip of her ice water.

  “Well, I just recently started working, but I’ve heard it’s bound to happen.”

  “Sounds fascinating,” Jim said. “I wish you all best with it.”

  Scotty lightly squeezed my shoulder and said, “Alexa has worked hard to get where she is now.”

  “If I didn’t know any better, I would think this is some blue-collar job,” Evelyn announced, wrinkling her nose as if she’d smelled something awful.

  “Mom!” Scotty snapped back at her.

  Regardless of Scotty’s reprimand, the woman just kept throwing insults and punches like some Major League pitcher tossing curve balls. Only this time, I managed to dodge her.

  “Actually, only the best of the best work with Isabella Bellini. It might do you some good to look her up sometime,” I retorted.

  And with that, she was rendered speechless—something I got the impression Evelyn was not used to.

  I kept my mouth shut for the next hour or so. I listened to Scotty bicker and joke back and forth with his family about things I knew nothing about. It was almost like I wasn’t even in the room.

  “I’d like to make an announcement,” Scotty said finally, tapping his wineglass with a spoon.

  The muffled laughter ceased at the chiming sound.

  “As you all know, Alexa and I have taken the next step in our relationship by moving in together.”

  Of course, I caught a sneer from his mother, but I ignored it.

  “That said, I think this is a good time to let you all know we have taken it a step further. We are officially engaged.”

  Both of Scotty’s sisters gasped, and I could have sworn Evelyn nearly passed out at the news.

  “Well, congratulations! This is splendid news,” Jim said. “Right, honey?”

  Evelyn stared at me like a deer trapped in the headlights. The warning sign in her eyes was flashing back at me when she said, “Alexa, sweetheart, if I may ask, how old are you?”

  I answered her question like it was the most natural thing in the world. “Almost twenty-one.”

  “Well—” Evelyn exhaled deeply and dragged her fingers through her hair. “That is a bit young, don’t you think? Surely you two are planning to wait a few years.”

  “No, Mom. We’re getting married this summer,” Scotty answered.

  “So soon? Goodness gracious. Why the rush?” she asked.

  “Life is too short, and I love your son dearly. There is no need to wait.” The one thing in my life I had control over was my relationship with her son, and she couldn’t do anything to take that away from me.

  “I guess that settles it then.” Evelyn tossed me a fake smile, and I shot one right back at her.

  “I think this is reason for celebration,” Jim said, raising his wine glass. “To Scott and Alexa.”

  Evelyn almost stumbled as she rose from her seat. “If you would excuse me, I have to use the ladies’ room.”

  “I just want to say I’m really happy for you two,�
�� Elizabeth mentioned.

  “Me too,” echoed Jaime with a genuine smile.

  “Thank you, girls. I really appreciate it,” Scotty said.

  One thing was for sure: I didn’t have his mother’s blessing. If this was any indication of what my future mother-in-law was going to be like, I was in for some hard times ahead.

  ***

  Scotty insisted on having the wedding ceremony and reception at our home. The way he took control of everything made the situation rather comical. He was more into planning the wedding than I was. Of course, all of Scotty’s help and suggestions were meaningful and appreciated.

  Ruth moved back to Orange County and opened her own law office in Newport Beach. She got top honors of assisting me in finding the perfect wedding dress and all other amenities since she was really the only close friend I had. It felt incredible to have my dear friend back. Technically, Scotty had been my only link to the social world. Needless to say, being able to have girl talk again was refreshing.

  I caught a bad case of the jitters on my wedding day. I had no family to speak of, so in a way, I was going through this whole thing alone. When I was a small girl, I never pictured getting married without my mother and father at my side. If I learned anything from all the heartbreak I’d experienced over the years, it was that life had a way of throwing me curve balls.

  Scotty asked Jim to do the honor of giving me away, and I didn’t object to it. Evelyn, of course, insisted on making a stink about the simple request.

  We slowly sauntered down the spiral staircase toward the French doors. I went into a slight panic as Jim led me out to the back yard. A gaggle of unfamiliar faces met my gaze, though I only recognized a few such as Ruth, Isabella, and Scotty’s immediate family. Most of the guests were from Scotty’s side. I really had nothing to contribute when it came to next of kin. It made me feel empty inside, like life had cheated me.

  The lush green landscape was set up with white chairs, and the aisle was speckled with red rose petals. Scotty and the pastor stood under the arch waiting for me to approach. I never saw Scotty look so proud. Truthfully, not for one moment did I stop and ask myself if I was ready for this commitment. I just held on to Scotty’s comforting hand, ignoring any self-doubt. He gazed at me through watery eyes as he said his vows, heartfelt words that echoed softly in my head.

  The pastor spoke about the meaning of our commitment to each other for the next thirty minutes.

  “I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Scott Logan,” the pastor said with a smile. “Scott, you may kiss your bride.”

  After Scotty leaned in and gave me a PG-13-rated kiss, he screamed out aloud to the crowd, “I’m married!”

  The reception was better than I ever dreamed. Truthfully, it was a fairytale wedding that years ago, I never imagined happening. I was only twenty-one when I married Scotty—what did I really know about life? Despite the age difference, I felt completely grown up and ready to take on the world.

  Something startled me as we danced our first dance as man and wife. For an eerie moment, I wasn’t looking at my new husband holding me, but rather a ghost from my past. Carter Storm stared deep into my soul, his vivid blue eyes stripping me of all defenses and inhibitions. I was entranced as he stroked each side of my face with this thumb and leaned in close to kiss my lips.

  “Babe, are you okay?” Scotty asked.

  I jolted back to reality. “Yeah, I’m fine.” A bizarre feeling of trepidation washed over me. “Just a little overwhelmed right now, I guess.”

  “Is that so? Well, tell me how it feels to be Mrs. Overwhelmed Scotty Logan.”

  Was it possible for someone to get cold feet after their vows?

  “It feels—amazing,” I said, ignoring my gut feeling.

  “Just think about tomorrow, babe. We’ll be in Tahiti listening to nothing but the sound of the surf.”

  I was so happy hours ago, knowing Scotty was it for me. Now, out of the blue, I envisioned another man who I hadn’t seen in over a decade, and the thought terrified me. I shook the image of Carter out of my mind, and clutched onto Scotty as I desperately tried to rid the voices in my head murmuring notions of unambiguous uncertainty.

  Footprint in the Sand

  

  1994

  A few days after our first date fiasco, Carter and I stayed after school and spent some time together. Seeing each other at home had become nearly impossible when Mary tried everything feasible to stop us. It got so bad that she even threatened to file a restraining order against me and my family, so we had to play it safe. Mom had warned me that my friendship with Carter was treading on dangerous ground, and that I was only to have contact with him at school. She was sorry it had to come to such extreme measures because she knew how much I cared for Carter, but we had no choice.

  It rained like a tropical storm, pouring down in buckets at school that morning. Fortunately, the afternoon morphed into a hot, dry, sunny day. With the whole field to ourselves, we spent an hour kicking a soccer ball back and forth. I breathed in the scent of wet earth. The damp grass squished beneath my shoes. The sun was out, warming our backs as we ran up and down the field.

  Carter stopped running and looked over into the far distance. “Hey, I bet I can kick this ball over the fence and into the freeway from here.” The fence was about fifty feet away.

  “But you’ll lose your ball.”

  “I can always buy another one,” Carter said, side kicking the ball into the air. “No biggie.”

  I squinted through the sunrays to see his adoring face. “Go ahead and try it then.”

  Carter picked the ball up and stepped back about ten long yards from the chain-link fence.

  “Yeah right. You’ll never make it,” I said.

  “Wanna bet?”

  “Here we go again. You and your bets.”

  “What will you give me if I make it?”

  “Uh—my undying gratitude?”

  “I was thinking more along the lines of a kiss,” he said with a wink.

  “What?” My face grew hot with blushes. “Are you serious?”

  He tossed the ball in the air and smirked, “Sure. Why not? Seems fair enough.”

  “I doubt you’ll make it over the fence, but if you do...we can work something out,” I responded, rolling my eyes.

  Carter placed the soccer ball back on the grass and proceeded to walk backwards. He eyed the ball with each step, like a leopard stalking its prey. At sixty feet away, he charged the ball and smashed it with his foot. The ball shot straight across the field—just barely making it over and landing right beside the chain-link fence.

  “Well, look at that,” Carter said, crossing his arms like a proud genie who just granted a monumental wish.

  “Yeah, that was some kick.”

  He was up to something by the mischievous look on his face.

  “Okay, here I come for my kiss.” Carter darted across the field and approached me. I ran from him in hilarity and giggles, as he raced to catch up. He continued chasing me around the field in circles. I ran like a quarterback making a touchdown until my feet slid from under me, and I ended up slipping into a large puddle of mud, butt first. I couldn’t really do anything more but laugh.

  Carter burst into hysterics as though it was the most comical thing he’d ever seen. “Oh my gosh,” he said, trying to hold back his laughter. “Are you okay?” He took my hand and lifted me up off the ground.

  “Yeah, just call me ‘Mud Butt’.” I twisted my head around and glanced at my behind. Mud had caked to my jeans like fast-drying clay. “Oh, man. How am I going to get this off?”

  He gestured over to the wooden green bleachers. “Guess we’re going to have to scrape it off.”

  I rubbed my butt up and down those bleachers like I was some sort of grizzly bear with an itch to scratch. Carter laughed so hard he was nearly in tears.

  “I’m glad I keep you amused.”

  “I’m sorry,” Carter said, wiping a tear from his eye. “But th
is is just too funny.”

  We sat on the bleachers in silence after I had scraped most of the mud off my butt. Both of us simply stared into the wide open field in silence.

  “Are you sure you’re all right?” Carter asked, breaking the pregnant pause.

  The seat of my jeans felt damp and uncomfortable. “My butt kinda hurts, but I’m good.”

  He clasped his hand with mine and broke into a sweet smile of recognition. “Let’s go walk it off.”

  We strolled the field until we got to the chain-link fence of the baseball diamond. Carter and I stood side by side in front of a muddy pot hole in silence. He slid the tip of his shoe back and forth in the mud, forming the letter C. I made out more letters as he continued to draw them out. When he was finished, I was shocked to read, C + A 4EVA. Carter then stamped his shoeprint in the mud like a seal of approval.

  “Put your shoeprint next to mine,” he insisted.

  To anyone else, this may have seemed like a cheesy gesture, but to me it was one of the sweetest things in the world. I dipped my shoe in the mud and stamped it next to his, a big shoe and a little shoe side by side. My heart melted like snow in the sunshine.

  “So when do I get that kiss?” he asked, leaning in.

  The whole time I seriously thought he was joking. Just before his lips met mine, I turned my head away. The depth of my feelings scared me to death. Yes, I wanted to kiss him as much as he wanted to kiss me. Only, the thought of us in a lip lock made my heart pound so hard I thought it was going to jump out of my chest. He tried to kiss me again and I foolishly ducked—I just wasn’t ready for it.

  Carter smiled like an angel and lightly squeezed my hand. “It’s okay. I’m not going to force you.”

  I was too much of a chicken to do it. Although, it wouldn’t be long before I was in this same position again.

  Chapter 11: The Serene Life

  The nightclub’s heavy techno base boomed so loudly that Aiden felt it vibrate from the floor to his Gucci shoes. Woozy after his eighth shot of Tequila, he concentrated on a handful of celebrities making their way through the club. High-profile young socialites mingled among the vigorous crowd, and at that exact moment, a scantily clad heiress made her way to the dance floor. At the sight of her, Aiden felt a throbbing sensation below his waist. He continued to keep his eye on Lourdes, the heiress and daughter of billionaire Gerard Billton. The man was so well known that some even purported he’d invented the Internet.

 

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