Chapter 15:
The Point of No Return
I admit it. I was completely miserable after walking out on Carter, and not to mention, things went downhill after that night. Isabella continued sending me on small jobs while Scotty relentlessly harped about the inconvenience of my schedule. After weeks of hiding it, I still had no intention of telling him about being fired. To make matters worse, and I never thought I’d hear myself saying it, working for Isabella had grown tedious. I felt like I was at a dead end. Leaving Isabella was a scary thought, but there comes a time in life when one must break away and venture out on their own. For me, that time had come. I decided to make a surprise visit to Scotty's office and get some things off my chest.
Scotty had been working at a prestigious real estate firm, Cody Estates, in Newport Beach for the past nine years. He was performing so well when I first met him that he quickly moved from agent to top broker, and he had aspirations of opening up his own office. With good reason, I was sure he would understand my decision to quit working for Isabella.
I drove into the parking lot of the three-story office building. The upscale structure was entirely constructed with large glass windows. I entered through heavy glass doors that led into a swanky lobby.
A young, run-of-the-mill skinny blonde female sat behind a circular granite-top reception desk. Out of nothing but sheer habit, I’m sure, she smiled when she saw me walk in.
“Hello there. How can I help you?” she said with the most annoying chirp.
“I'm here to see Scott Logan. I'm his wife, Alexa.”
“Oh, just one second,” she said, pressing a button on her phone. “Scott? Your wife is in the lobby. Okay, I'll tell her.” She giggled into the phone like a schoolgirl. “He says he'll be right down.”
“Thanks.” I smiled uneasily and glanced around at all the fancy artwork on the walls.
“Hey, kid. This is a surprise.” Strangely, Scotty didn't bother to hug or kiss me. It was as though he was suddenly too shy to show affection in front of the receptionist. “So you got off work early?” he asked, flatly.
“Yeah, I wanted to drop by and say hello.”
“Well, let's go to my office,” he said. “Gretchen, can you hold my calls please?”
“Sure, Scotty,” she responded.
A knot of anger formed in my belly. The way she said his name was a bit too friendly for my liking. I was the only one allowed to call him by his nickname.
I peered around the office as we walked down the hallway. We passed an open area lined row after row with cubicles. Salespeople were hard at work, conducting business on cordless phone headsets. They restlessly strolled back and forth while talking on the phone.
“Hey, Scott,” said a female with mile-long legs and brunette locks cascading down her shoulders.
“Well hello there,” Scotty responded a bit too eagerly for my taste. “Oh, Laura, I'd like you meet my wife, Alexa.”
Her spine stiffened noticeably. The second Scotty uttered the word “wife,” the twinkle in her eyes faded. “Oh, I didn't know you were married, Scott.”
“Almost four years,” I quickly chimed in.
“Well, you two make a great-looking couple. It's so nice to meet you, Alexa.”
“Laura has only been here a few weeks,” Scotty mentioned.
“Scott, when you get a chance, I need to talk to you about the Roth property.”
“No problem. I'll give you a buzz in a bit.”
Scotty closed his door for privacy, and pulled down the blinds. His office had a warm feeling about it with that new furniture smell. His oversized L-shaped desk and matching brown leather chair made for a homey atmosphere. Scotty’s college degree hung on the wall, along with several photographs of us together. Across the desk was a silver framed photo of us on our wedding day. One thing came to mind: How could Laura not know about us being married?
He leaned over his desk and kissed me. “You certainly made my day by showing up here out of the blue like this.”
“I just wanted to talk.”
Scotty’s mind obviously wasn’t on the conversation. In the middle of my sentence, he pulled out a notepad and jotted something down, which I was sure pertained to business.
“What’s on your mind, kid?”
“It's about my job,” I said. “I think I’m going to quit.”
Scotty looked up from his notepad and raised an eyebrow at me. “Huh?”
“I’m tired of being the gofer.”
“Last time I checked, you were far from anyone’s gofer.”
“Well, it’s not what I want to do anymore.” I gazed out the window behind him. “I’m ready to venture out on my own. I pretty much know the ins and outs of the industry now.”
“Wait a minute—hold up. I thought you liked what you were doing. You’ve lost me here.”
“For over three years, I've had someone telling me what to do and how long to do it. I'm sick of all these tedious jobs.”
Scotty swung around in his chair. “But if I recall, Isabella gave you a great job on a movie set. You said so yourself that this project was going to open doors for you.”
If he only knew the truth. I debated whether to tell him or not, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. “It’s complicated.”
“So you're going to quit—just like that?” he asked.
“Eventually.”
“This is just so out of the blue, Alexa. Where is this coming from? Sometimes you’re like day and night. I don’t get it.”
“I’ve actually been thinking about this for a while.”
“If you ask me, you’ve put too much into your job to just get up and walk away from it.”
“You don't think I can make it on my own?” I asked, feeling a pang of hurt in the pit of my stomach. “Is that what you’re saying?”
“I just think you need to put yourself on the map before you make such an irrational, life-changing decision such as this.”
“You know, I thought you would be happy about this, considering you’re always complaining about my hours. What’s the problem now, Scotty?”
“Alexa,” Scotty said, leaning over his desk, “this is neither the time nor the place to be having this discussion. If I had known what your surprise visit was going to be about, I would have told you to save it for later.”
“I'm out of here.” I steeled myself as I charged out the door. I tried not to make a scene, but all eyes veered in my direction anyway when I barged out of Cody Estates.
***
I started the engine to my car and just drove. I didn't know where I was going, but I would know when I got there. The further I went, the more I drifted off into my own world. Before I knew it, I arrived in Los Angeles. My compulsion was like a disease, an addiction I just couldn’t shake. I was almost ashamed that I found myself once again standing in front of Carter Storm’s door.
I turned my gaze toward the garage. Carter’s silver BMW was parked in the driveway, so I knew he had to be home. My feet felt like they were stuck in cement. I couldn’t inch myself away from his doorstep. My shaky index finger pressed the doorbell, and I told myself that if he didn't come to the door within thirty seconds, I would leave without a second thought. When he didn’t, I turned around and walked back down the pathway to my car.
“Alexa?”
If God hadn’t wanted that moment to happen, he should have let me walk away without hearing Carter’s voice.
“Oh, hey, Carter. I was just in the area. I thought I would drop by and say hi.”
“This is a nice surprise. Do you want to come in?”
I hesitated and then answered, “Sure, maybe for a few.”
“I thought I'd never see you again, you know, after what happened last time,” he said, cautiously. “If I offended you in any way—”
“No, let's just forget about that night.”
I threw my arms around him without the slightest bit of hesitation. I knew I was treading on dangerous territory, but I needed to feel
the warmth of his body against mine. I longed to inhale that familiar intoxicating scent of sweat and spicy cologne.
“Whoa. Are you okay? You’re trembling.”
“I don’t know what I was thinking,” I said softly. “Just hold me.”
My mood suddenly changed at the sight of a basketball resting by the closet door. “You still play ball?”
“Hell yeah. Every chance I get.”
“You know, even after all these years, I’m still pretty sure I could kick your ass at a game of one on one,” I teased.
Carter still had the guts to challenge me, and he proved it by shooting me a knowing glance. When he thought I wasn’t paying attention, he tossed me the ball. “You’re on.”
***
Carter’s back yard was equivalent to a small amusement park. We walked past tennis courts that looked practically unused, and a sparkling, Olympic-sized swimming pool. Across from the pool was a go-cart area. Right beside it was an ever-so-beautiful basketball court that exceeded any kid’s wildest imagination.
A slight breeze whisked against my face as I watched Carter dribble the ball around in a circle.
“Okay, so how about you and I make a bet? For old time sake?” Carter said, with the ball tucked underneath his arm. “Winner has to buy loser dinner.”
Somehow, I knew I’d be the one forking over the dough for an expensive dinner, but I insisted on trash talking anyway. “You’re on, Mr. Storm. I already know where you’re taking me.”
Carter was still quite skillful at basketball, maybe even better than he was in his younger years. All that practice had done him good. Not to mention, he had grown a few new muscles here and there. Without warning, he swooped in from behind me and stole the ball. I successfully blocked him from making a basket after trying to out think his next move.
I looked over my shoulder from time to time to see Carter trailing behind me. I ran to the basket dribbling the ball, and shouted, “You might as well give up now!”
He came up from behind me again and stole the ball from my grip. The only way to indulge in his devious behavior was to be just as devious as he was. I quickly snatched the ball back and tried for a basket from the free throw line. A flicker of hope arose as I watched the ball swish through the hoop.
“Oh yeah, baby!” I yelled.
Carter groaned. “Yeah, that was a lucky shot,” he said, breathing heavily. “One-four.”
In the middle of the next round, Carter decided to try a new approach by tickling me under my ribs. I ended up giggling so hard that I dropped the ball.
“Gotcha,” he said as he made a shot. “Six-one.”
“You're bratty,” I said, feeling my body overheat by his touch. I wiped my sweaty face with my forearm and said, “And you play dirty.”
We played so intensely that it felt like I’d just spent hours in a sauna, but I wasn’t ready to give up just yet. This time, I blocked him from making a shot by wildly waving my arms in front of him. Two could play his game.
“Alexa,” he said, trying to focus on the basket, “stop it!” Anyone could see that he was having a hard time keeping himself from chuckling.
I grabbed the ball after his one dribble. Unfortunately, he grabbed me before I made my getaway. Goose pimples rose on my arms the moment he sneaked up from behind and wrapped his arms around my waist.
“I like you sweaty,” he whispered so softly in my ear that it almost tickled.
I turned to putty in his arms. As a result of such a distraction, he was able to seize the ball and make a perfect shot. Pain ripped through my calves. I was too fatigued to chase after him.
“All right, you win—I owe you,” I said, gasping for breath.
Carter looked euphoric. He twirled the ball around on his finger, and said, “Rules just changed.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Winner buys loser dinner.”
“I guess I can live with that,” I said with a smile.
We cooled off by dipping our feet in the pool. I stared into the fluorescent blue water as I sat at the ledge. The water rippled into small waves caused by the circular motion I created with my dangling feet.
“I'm really glad you showed up tonight,” Carter said.
“Me too. I just needed to get away for a while.”
“You seemed kind of troubled when you got here. Are you sure everything is okay?”
“Where should I begin? Should we start with my job? Or my—”
“Husband?” he finished off for me.
“It’s complicated.”
“He gave you a hard time today?”
“You could say that.”
“He must have really upset you to make you come all the way out here,” he said sincerely. “I know nothing about married life, but it’s gotta be rough.”
“Well, it wasn’t like this before we got married. When we were dating, he wanted me to follow my dreams. Back then, he was the one person who believed in me.” I sighed heavily and continued. “The thing about Scotty is that he’s the all-American boy. He wants the white picket fence with the dog and two and a half kids. When we first got married, I thought I wanted that kind of life, too, but now? Well, I’m not so sure anymore.”
“People change.”
“I’m beginning to realize that,” I said. “Before I found you, I thought I was content with my life.”
Carter raised an eyebrow. “What are you saying?”
“That you were right when you said that everything happens for a reason. God has given us a second chance. I’m not going to let you slip through my fingers again.”
Carter smiled and brushed his thumb up against my cheek. I fought it as long as I could. When I leaned in and kissed him, I threw my inhibitions to the wind. My heart pounded as his hand caressed the small of my back.
“I can’t do this,” I whispered.
“Yes you can.” Carter leaned in to kiss me again, his mouth hungrily searching for mine. “You know you want to.”
“No, I mean—I can't do this to my husband,” I said, feeling remorseful.
“Then leave him.”
“If it were only that easy.”
Carter pushed a strand of hair away from my face. “So what now? You tell me what you want, Alexa.”
The answer struck me with the force of something sharp and painful. “I don’t know. I just...I guess I feel trapped.” I rested my head on his shoulder. “I want to be with you, but I don’t want to hurt him either. He’s been my savior for the past five years.”
The intimate silence surrounding us made it hard to fight my desire to kiss him again. I pulled him in close and tumbled on top of him. Sparks of electricity shot down my spine as Carter’s warm lips grazed down the side of my neck.
“Will you come back and see me on Friday?” he asked, holding my head steady with both of his hands. “I still owe you dinner.”
My feelings ran so deeply for this man that they were hard to voice, let alone run away from. “Yes, I’ll come back to you, Carter. I’ll always come back to you.
***
I arrived home to a houseful of rowdy men yelping and cheering. Everyone was crammed together on the couch, watching a basketball game. Unfortunately, I really wasn't in the mood to be social, and the Lakers were the furthest thing from my mind.
“Hey, Scott, your woman's home.”
“Hello to you too, Eric!” I yelled from the kitchen.
“Hey, I wanted to apologize for this afternoon,” Scotty said, approaching me.
I tried very hard not to think of Carter while Scotty stood in front of me, but it was hopeless. “It's cool. I'm over it,” I replied.
“I’m glad to hear that, but we still have to talk about it later, okay?” he said, wrapping his arms around me. “I hate it when we fight.”
“You know I feel the same way.”
“We’ll have a good time at my awards dinner on Friday,” Scotty mentioned.
“Wait—what awards dinner?”
“You forgot alrea
dy?”
“It’s been a long day. Refresh my memory.”
“You know, the company’s annual awards dinner—the one you promised to get off work early for so you could go with me, remember?”
The walls were closing in on me. I didn’t know how I would be able to see Carter if I had to be at that dinner with my husband. I needed to find a way to get out of that dinner—fast.
Chapter 16: Together at Last
The first order of business the next afternoon was working up enough courage to tell Isabella that I was ready to move on to bigger and better things. A deep ache of sadness engulfed me as I passed through those reminiscent school doors. I gazed down the desolate hallway to where the ghosts of my former life rushed back at me. It only reminded me of how years ago everything in my life had crumbled with no warning.
I stood at the classroom door and glared through a small glass window. Isabella was in the middle of teaching new hopefuls. The skeptical arch of Isabella’s perfectly trimmed eyebrow lifted up and down as she spoke to the students. This made it difficult for me to interrupt her. Isabella mouthed something to the class and made her way to the door.
“Well, hello, Alexa. This is certainly a surprise.”
“I really need to talk to you when you get a free moment.”
“As you can see, I'm in the middle of a lesson.”
“I know. I can wait.”
She shot me a dubious look and gestured me inside the classroom. “Come on in.”
Twenty pairs of eyes darted in my direction
“Class, I'd like to introduce you to my intern of three years, Mrs. Alexa Logan.”
“Hello,” I said shyly.
“If you would open your textbooks to chapter eight and begin reading. I have to go into my office for a quick meeting. I’ll be back rather shortly.”
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