My Heart Can't Tell You No

“I’ll hurry.”

  “Don’t hurry. It won’t hurt to be late once. Drive carefully.”

  “Are you worried?” An impish smile came to him.

  “Just drive carefully.”

  Joe was half an hour late for work, but they didn’t complain as there hadn’t been any calls during that time. John though, was already standing in the hangar with their second helicopter opened as he made some adjustments.

  “I saw you weren’t out yet when I left home. I figured you were going to be late, but not this late. You look like you just woke up,” John called from the front of the aircraft.

  “I did. An hour ago,” he called back as he poured himself a cup of coffee, then moved around toward the area where John was working. Joe watched him loosening some bolts, but by the time they both realized it was letting go, it was too late and the contraption, weighing about twenty-five pounds, fell quickly, hitting John on the head and knocking him to the concrete below. “Jesus! John!”

  The flight nurse and EMT standing near the coffee pot came running, both kneeling next to the unconscious man on the floor. Joe immediately moved their flight packs to where they were checking pulses before placing a protective C-collar on him. Tom, who was just coming in from a ground run, moved to stand with Joe as they watched the two women working on John.

  “Jesus, Joe, what the hell did ya do to him?” Tom asked, almost in awe.

  “Tom, looks like we better run him down to the ER,” said the paramedic to the men behind him.

  “Man, I just got back. I didn’t even get to clean out the back of the ambulance yet,” Tom complained, as only Tom could.

  Joe waited at the hangar while Tom drove John to the main hospital’s emergency room about a half mile away. He called in the extra help that would be needed to fill in for John and himself, hoping he would be able to go over and check on his friend before long. When he finally got there, he found Beth talking quietly to a middle-aged man in a sports shirt, tie and dress slacks.

  “Beth, how’s he doing?”

  At the sound of Joe’s voice, the two parted, turning to look at him. Joe recognized the man as the supervisor of the Environmental Services Department; the department where Beth was a secretary.

  “I—I don’t know yet. I—just got here.” Beth responded quickly.

  “Let me know if I can do anything, Beth,” the man said softly, then left the waiting room.

  “What do you mean, you just got here? John’s been down here for almost two hours.” Joe asked, eying Beth with uncertainty, but, before she could respond, a slim, auburn-haired young woman entered the room.

  When she saw the woman, Beth’s stance turned rigid. The woman looked to be close to Maddie’s age and was dressed in a manner that spoke of her position in one of the hospital’s administrative departments.

  “Mrs. Baker?” She glanced around almost nervously, as her eyes adjusted to the room’s dimness, then focused on Beth. “Beth.”

  “Laural.” Beth responded stiffly, ignoring the extended hand. “Maybe you can answer Joe’s question. I’m sure you’ve been in to see John.”

  Laural overlooked Beth’s snide comment and turned her gaze to Joe, smiling slightly to acknowledge him. Her hand automatically went to him, offering a firm, but quick handshake; her dismissal of Beth’s sarcastic attitude dignifying her presence.

  “Joe?” she asked.

  “Friend of the family.” Joe explained, noticing a gentleness enter the girl’s eyes as she looked at him before her self-assurance returned and she took over the conversation.

  “Then hello Joe, friend of the family. You had a question?”

  “I was asking how John was.”

  “They tell me he seems to be doing fine—sore, of course, but fine. I believe they’ll be keeping him in the hospital overnight for observation. I take it you’re Joe McNier, the flight pilot?” Laural smiled slightly at his curious expression. “Your clothes. Dead giveaway. Consequently, my position in Human Resources requires my investigation of today’s accident and I believe you were a witness?”

  “Yeah, I was there.” Joe watched Beth’s expression turn even colder as she observed the other woman’s continued conversation with him.

  “I understand that right now must be an inconvenient time for you, especially being a friend of the family, but if you could fill out an accident report, that would be great. You can send it interoffice and address it to Laural Bainbridge.”

  “I did it this morning. It’s in our out-box now.”

  “Great.” She smiled again before briefly glancing back to Beth. “Beth.”

  Joe watched Laural leave just as Tom was entering the room with a cup of coffee. Tom’s glance moved over Beth then to Joe, his eyes lighting with amusement.

  “Can’t hurt that guy.” Tom teased as he referred to his brother. “He’s got a noggin as hard as concrete.”

  “Almost as hard as yours, huh?” Joe teased back, his mind already leaving the static between John’s wife, Beth, and the young beauty, Laural. Whatever their problem was, he wasn’t interested enough to squander his energy on it. He had seen enough tiffs between coworkers to know he’d be better off keeping his nose out of it.

  By eleven o’clock Beth was back with John, so Tom and Joe headed out; Tom going home and Joe heading to the store where he hoped to find Maddie.

  “Can I help you?” Rodney watched Joe enter the store, the corners of his mouth tilting up upon recognition. “Oh, it’s you.”

  “Yeah—it’s me,” Joe said dryly.

  “Maddie isn’t here. You just missed her.”

  “I take it you know who I am.” Joe’s voice was chilled.

  “Of course I know. You’re Joe McNier. Maddie’s . . . fellow.”

  Joe looked at him curiously. Her fellow? “That doesn’t bother you?”

  “Me? Why should it bother me? Unless you mean that since you’ve come back she’s been a bit edgy. She used to be the best boss I’ve ever worked for. But lately she’s been on the crabby side. Oh, don’t get me wrong. She’s still a good lady to work for; it’s just that she used to be better. I hope your influence doesn’t make her lose any of her usual customers. So far she’s only letting her temper show around me and the other two clerks. Last night she was so distracted she nearly killed me with a box of thread while doing inventory.” Then under his breath he added. “Although she came in this morning in a damn fine mood, I must say.”

  “Her customers. Your boss? She owns this place?”

  “Yes.” Rodney looked at him closely. “You didn’t know?”

  “And you’re not involved with her?” Joe was eyeing him just as closely.

  Rodney stifled a laugh very efficiently. “No.”

  “Where is she?”

  “She got a call from the hospital about John. She went up there.”

  Joe went back to his truck and started out to Sarah and Jack’s house. He didn’t know why Maddie told him she was involved with Rodney, and that he was the owner of the store—but he intended to find out.

  “Hi, Joey. You just getting home from work?” Sarah stood at the stove where she was finishing preparations for supper.

  “No, I stopped in to see John. He’ll be coming home tomorrow.” He sat at the kitchen table after glancing in the room to see Robby on the floor pushing a tank over a mountain of two sneakers.

  “Mm-hmm. I know. They already called me.” She sat on the other side of the table, looking at the jigsaw puzzle laid out before her. “Did you see Jackie anywhere down there?”

  “Yeah, he’s down watching Tom change a tire. Do you know what time Maddie’s supposed to be home tonight?”

  Sarah looked up at him, then reached for her cup of coffee as she leaned back in her chair. “No, not exactly.”

  “She owns the store in town.”

  “Yes. She’s hoping to open another sometime next year. Is that a problem?”

  “I don’t know, you tell me. She told me Rodney owned it.”

  “Ro
dney? Rodney doesn’t even own his own home. Granted his parents are wealthy, but his father threw him out of the house long ago.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know,” she said in a tone that suggested she knew perfectly well. “They loved him well enough when he was a baby and a little boy. Something like that should make no difference as far as they’re concerned. He’s still the same person he was then.”

  “What are you talking about?” Joe was totally lost in the conversation.

  Sarah looked at him and smiled softly, realizing he didn’t know. “Well, lets just say Rodney will never give his parents grandchildren.”

  “Why? Is he sterile? They’re mad because he’s sterile?” Joe asked with raised brow.

  Sarah’s eyes rolled in disbelief. “No, Joey. He’s not sterile. My goodness, Joey, can’t you tell when a man is a little different?”

  “He’s gay?!” Joe blurted out in embarrassment before he could stop himself.

  “What’s gay?” Robby asked as he entered the kitchen with his tank.

  “Ask your mother when she gets home,” Joe told him. “Why don’t you go back in the room and watch television?”

  “I don’t know what they’re doing. They’re throwing a big black ball on the floor at a bunch of white things.”

  “They’re bowling,” Joe explained absently.

  “Gram, can I go out with Tom and Jackie?”

  “You go straight down to them and don’t wander off.”

  Robby was out the door in an instant. Joe got up and poured himself a cup of coffee. “She told me she was having a relationship with him.”

  Sarah laughed as she put a piece of puzzle in its place. “Sounds to me like she was pulling your leg.”

  “About both? You don’t think it’s more than that? I mean, she had plenty of opportunity to tell me, didn’t she?”

  “Well, she didn’t tell any of us not to tell you. So, it wasn’t as if she was hiding anything, not when any one of us could have told you at any moment. She probably just didn’t think it was important enough to bring up. We never told you because it never came into conversation. Unless she thought you’d be intimidated by it. Are you?”

  “Why should I be? I have no reason to be comparing wages with the girl.”

  This time when Sarah looked up at him, he felt as if he were ten years old again and she were about to scold him.

  “I was up this morning when you walked by, and since you’re not in the habit of an early morning walk, I knew where you were coming from.”

  He looked down at his cup. “I had to go home and change for work.”

  “What are you going to do if she gets pregnant?”

  “I didn’t stop to think about it.”

  “No, I don’t suppose you did.” She looked back to her puzzle in frustration. “You never did before.”

  “You know about the other times,” he said flatly. He knew if anyone in the family would know, it would be her.

  “Do you love her, Joey? I don’t mean the childish, obsessive kind of love Bob had for her where it ruins you. But the kind of love that can grow with you and not remain stagnant.”

  “You think it was Bob’s love for Maddie that destroyed him?”

  “I don’t know what destroyed Bob. But I do know I should have never let them get married. I watched him all of Maddie’s life, seen him standing forever in the background just to pick up the pieces you left behind. I often wonder if his obsession for her wasn’t really an obsession for something he could steal away from you.”

  “What the hell did you do to John?!” Maddie burst through the door. “And why didn’t you stay with him? I thought he was your friend!”

  “Maddie.” Sarah tried to quiet her.

  “Ya know, I always wondered why you only showed at the hospital after I was well on the way to recovery, and then only stayed long enough to show me you were still angry. Is this some kind of reverse psychological drawback to working where you do? You can’t be responsible enough to stick around when you’re needed in your personal life?”

  “Maddie!! Shut up and sit down!” Sarah’s sternness turned Maddie’s shocked gaze to her.

  “What do you mean I only showed up when you were recovering?” Joe looked at her. “And why does everyone immediately presume I did something to John?!”

  “What do you think I mean?” She turned to leave, but her mother’s voice stopped her.

  “Get back here!” When Maddie looked at her, she continued. “For your information Joe was in the hospital with you from the very beginning. He didn’t leave the hospital for days, not until we finally put our foot down and sent him home for some sleep and a bath. And there were only two times that he showed any anger in front of any of us—when he heard Bob was drunk and drove into that wall, and when you woke up long enough to make funeral arrangements before you went off half-cocked and told him you never wanted to see him again.”

  “I did not!” Maddie looked at her through huge eyes. “I didn’t even have a chance to speak to him!”

  “Oh, you spoke all right, little girl. You weren’t in your right head—that dope they were pumping into your veins saw to that. But you spoke to him. He just didn’t stick around long enough to find out that you could have been talking to the man on the moon as far as you were concerned. You were sliding in and out of it all that day and well into the next. You saw your brother Jackie and accused him of killing Bob too. And a few times you told us that you were eating french fries, so I knew your sense of reality had you somewhere between Lewis Carroll and Mary Shelley. And about work today, he was where he was supposed to be.”

  Maddie was staring at her mother. Joe watched as her jaws clenched in tensed anger. She glanced at Joe, then back to Sarah before she moved to the window and gazed outside. “He was there—and you never told me?”

  “I never had any reason to. I never thought you believed otherwise.” Sarah tried another piece to her puzzle. “Is he moving in with you, down there?”

  “NO!” Maddie turned and ran out the door, bringing Joe’s and Sarah’s shocked gazes to one another. “Why did you do that?! Get in the house!”

  Joe moved to the porch to see what the commotion was.

  “I was bowling,” Robby told her.

  “Get in there!”

  Maddie started down the footpath to the area where Tom had been changing a tire, but was now picking Jackie off the ground and brushing dirt from his clothes as a tire bounced precariously close by before falling onto its side. Jackie’s face showed his pain as he looked down at his hands and knees. Joe could see the knees, covered with the gray of the dirt he had been knocked into and pink from the blood that was slowly oozing from brush-burned skin. Maddie picked him up and carried him back up to the house, the child’s feet dangling almost to the ground, showing how tall the boy was growing.

  “What happened?” Joe held the door open for her.

  “I told you to get in there!” she said, turning to the boy who had just noticed the blood on his brother’s knees. “The little . . . he rolled a tire down the hill and knocked Jackie over.”

  “Does it hurt?” Robby whispered, his own little face showing as much pain as Jackie’s.

  “Shut up!” Jackie yelled at him, then let the tears fall that he had been trying to hide.

  The sight broke Robby’s heart, bringing a wail from him as he began his crying jag and ran into the kitchen. “Gram! Fix Jackie! I hurt him!”

  Maddie sat the older boy on the table and stepped into the bathroom long enough to get a wet washcloth and a large wooden box that Jack had made into a first-aid kit.

  “Come here,” Sarah soothed as Robby climbed onto her lap.

  “How’s that?” Maddie put the cloth on Jackie’s hand to remove some of the dirt.

  “It burns,” Jackie sobbed.

  “It burns, Grammy,” Robby wailed as Sarah tried to hide her amusement.

  “Shut up!” Jackie looked at him with red eyes, then inhaled sharp
ly with a new flow of tears as Maddie tried to dab the dirt from his other hand. “It hurts! There’s something there!”

  “There’s somethin’ there, Gram!” Robby repeated.

  Maddie removed the cloth and looked closely at the wound. With a huge gulp, she dropped into the chair next to her and looked up at her mother.

  “Now we all know why I never went into the medical profession.” Maddie’s face was pale. “There’s a stone lodged under the skin.”

  “Well, you could let me try to get it out, but the way my eyes have been I’d probably end up hurting him more,” her mother explained.

  Robby sobbed harder. “There’s a big rock stuck in him, Gram. Ya gotta get it out!”

  Maddie looked up at Joe. “Can you . . . ?”

  He moved over to the boy, taking Jackie’s small hand in his and looking at the wound. He looked up at Jackie. “This is gonna hurt.”

  “It’ll hurt, Gram!” Robby cried but Jackie merely nodded his head.

  Maddie prepared a bandage as Joe went about his work, slowly prying the stone from where it had been lodged between a thick layer of skin and flesh. When it was finally removed a steady flow of blood washed it clean. He glanced up at the boy as he pressed some gauze against the wound, seeing he was pale and starting to sway.

  “Maddie.” Joe alerted her before Jackie could fall from his perch on the table. She grabbed her son and slowly lowered him back as Joe grabbed his feet and moved him until his full length was stretched across the table. “Are you all right? Do you think you’re going to be sick?” he asked the boy.

  “I feel . . . funny.”

  “I know. But you’re almost done now, Sailor.” Maddie put the bandage on his palm, then pressed a kiss to the injury. She picked up the washcloth again and gently wiped the dirt from his knees then sprayed them with an antiseptic/disinfectant before helping him from the table. “Robby. Go get your things together. I think we’ve given your grandmother enough excitement for one day. Do you think you can make it now, Jackie?”

  “Yes.” He looked irritably at his brother who still hadn’t moved from his grandmother’s lap. “Go get your things!”

  “Gram, do I have to go? I don’t wanna go down yet,” Robby whined.