by Tiece
“Oh shit,” Winter joked. “Hey Chase.”
“Hey Winter.” He spoke with a slight smile on his face.
“Don’t mind me. I was just leaving,” she said, and then glanced back over her shoulder at her sister. “Don’t forget what we talked about.”
Rayne smiled at the sight of just seeing Chase standing there as she responded back to her sister. “I won’t. Now get outta here.” Before Winter could walk off good, Chase had walked inside of Rayne’s place and instantly put his arms around her waist. He kissed her softly on the neck, and then said…
“I’ve missed you and I’m sorry that I hurt you.”
***
Rayne stood there with her eyes closed enjoying the moment. With Chase’s arms around her body, and the way he whispered that he missed her was going to be a memory that would never fade. She smiled, and then wrapped her arms around his waist. She had to admit to herself that it did feel good to be with him. There was no denying that.
“Can we talk?” Chase questioned as he backed up a little to get a good look at her.
She stood there in a pair of hot pink boy shorts and a matching hot pink tank top that read, Pretty, Young, & Talented, embroidered on the front of it in white letters. To top it off, she had on a pair of knee high, white socks with a hot pink trim at the top of them. She definitely had a style of her own and it turned Chase on, to say the least.
“I’d like that,” Rayne responded as she turned to head down the hallway to her bedroom. “Maybe I should go throw on some pants or something.”
Chase grinned as he watched her fat ass. “I’ve seen much less than that on you,” he said thinking about the night when she’d gotten out the shower thinking that he had already left.
She turned to face him with a bashful smile. “Weeeeell, in that case,” she said grabbing him by the hand and pulling him towards the living room. “Let’s sit down.”
Chase happily followed her. He didn’t expect her to be this courteous after she’d snapped on him for admitting that he and Brooke had fucked when all they were supposed to be doing was talking. Once they made their way into the living room, she sat down as Chase sat down beside her. She looked over at him just feeling thankful that he was there.
“So, let’s talk.” She said.
Chase first stared at her. It was something about her beauty that did something to him. She was not only gorgeous on the outside, but it also matched on the inside. He wanted nothing more than to let Brooke go and be with her; if only it was that easy.
“Well,” he started as he rested his hand on her thigh. “I really, really like you. I don’t know any other way to say that. I’m feeling you so much that it bothers me for you to be mad with me.”
Rayne couldn’t help but blush. She wasn’t expecting him to start off with that.
“I don’t like us having any issues. That’s why I don’t like speaking of Brooke.” He said looking her directly in the eyes. “But, I’m not gonna be one of those niggas that’ll lie to you. I wanted so bad to tell you that nothing happened, because that was easier to say. It would’ve been over and done with, but I’d rather you know of me as someone that’s gonna keep it one hundred, regardless of the circumstances.”
“I appreciate the truth.” Rayne softly said to his surprise. “I shouldn’t have gotten upset with you about that. I do understand that’s your son’s mother and the place where you lay your head. Maybe I’d gotten beside myself when you insisted on bringing me home, with or without her approval. I think at that moment, I wished more than anything that it was just me and you. I know that’s selfish, because I’d blocked out everything else, but as always reality kicks in, and then I’m down on myself for even going there with you.”
Chase understood exactly where she was coming from. She wasn’t like no other chick that he’d encountered. It was reasons like this that kept him intrigued with wanting to be a major part of her life. He wanted to be that man. He’d heard some of her stories about them growing up and he felt bad for her. In a way, he wanted to make things right and give her more love than she’d know what to do with. However, it was only so much that he could do as long as she continued to guard her heart.
“What exactly do you want from me? Whatever it is, I’ll do it.” He said to her.
Rayne sat there twiddling her fingers for a moment lost in thought as she tried thinking of the right response. “Well,” she started.
“Just be honest with me. What is it that you really want?”
“I want you,” she confessed. “I want you and me to be in this blissful relationship. I want the big carat ring and a big wedding. I want a dozen white roses from time to time, just because you know they’re my favorite. I want us to have babies of our own and make love for hours at any given time of the day.”
Chase smiled. He’d never heard her express feelings of this nature. It definitely put things in perspective for him as he sat silently only nodding his head to let her know that he was paying attention.
“The first day I walked in your studio I already knew that something special was about to happen. I didn’t know you, but I’d heard about you. I definitely wasn’t expecting you to look so damn good.” She teased causing him to chuckle a little. “My stomach instantly caught butterflies at just the sight of you. I don’t know if you felt it, but when you shook my hand upon us meeting it was an intense feeling that shot through my body like something electric.”
“I thought I was the only one that felt that.” Chase chimed in.
Rayne smiled at just knowing that he felt it, too. The feeling was mutual. “Look,” she continued. “What I’m trying to say is that I really, really like you, too. And, I know that I have to loosen up a little more. Even though you’ve been nothing but good to me, I’ve not given you a chance here. However, I never want you to think that I don’t want to, because I do.”
At that point she stood up and this time she willingly straddled his lap as she wrapped her arms around his neck and stared intently in his deep, sexy eyes. Chase was even more surprised as he sat there staring back at her.
“I know you have a commitment to deal with back at home with Brooke and your son. I won’t wait forever, but I’ll wait for a little while for you to realize what it is that you really want from me. You know in order for you to have all of me, you can’t intimately have none of her. It’s either me or her; no and’s, if’s or buts about it.”
Chase nodded his head with a sincere look in his eyes. “I know, baby. Just give me a little time and we’ll make this work.”
“You promise?”
“I promise,” Chase responded and before he could get out anything else, Rayne had leaned in and passionately kissed him. Sparks jumped off like it was the fourth of July. She was indeed full of nothing but surprises and he loved it. Chase palmed her ass and seductively kissed her back. He wanted all of her, but he doubted that she’d go that far. He wasn’t pressing the issue though as long as he’d finally hit first base. He knew that their relationship was about to get interesting, real interesting. But, as long as she stayed down he would make sure that everything she’d just mentioned that she wanted, she’d get. Mentally, he’d already put his life on it.
Chapter 8
Dr. Jackson came rushing into her office where Brooke sat patiently waiting for her. She closed the door behind her and quickly sat her briefcase down on the floor. “I’m so sorry, I’m late.” She said while taking a seat in her office chair. Once she got everything settled, she focused her attention on Brooke. “How are you doing?” She asked.
“I’m doing good. Thanks for seeing me again.” Brooke responded.
“No problem,” Dr. Jackson said. She leaned back in the chair and picked up Brooke’s folder that she placed on her desk. She glanced at it for a few minutes before looking up at Brooke. “So, what brings you here today?”
Brooke stared back at Dr. Jackon. She was definitely familiar with her being that she was the Psychologist that Brooke visited wh
en she moved to Atlanta. Looking at Dr. Jackson’s stern face caused her to instantly get nervous for some reason. She glanced away and looked down at her right hand. She started to peel the old red nail polish off of her index finger. Ugh! I need a manicure ASAP. These things are looking horrible. She thought allowing her mind to get distracted for a moment. Dr. Jackson calling her name snapped her out of her thoughts. “What you say again?” She asked like she didn’t hear the doctor the first time, even though she’d heard the question loud in clear.
“I was asking what brings you here today?” Dr. Jackson softly repeated again now looking at Brooke with a concerned look on her face.
“Ummm, ” Brooke said clearing her throat. She pondered the question over in her head. Initially, when she had called Dr. Jackson, it was because she felt that she needed to save her relationship with Chase. But, after the spontaneous loving making session they’d had. She felt confident that Chase wasn’t going anywhere no time soon. When Dr. Jackson had called her to see if she could come in the afternoon instead of the morning, she was about to cancel. Something in her wouldn’t let her though. So, she decided to keep it.
“Don’t get nervous, Brooke.” Dr. Jackson leaned forward. “You know this is a non-judging zone and remember whatever we talk about stays in here.”
Brooke glanced up from her hand and over at Dr. Jackson. The concerned look that she had on her face from earlier had disappeared and was replaced with a warm, inviting smile. The smile seemed to put Brooke a little more at ease. She didn’t even know why she was so nervous. It wasn’t like she hadn’t sat in that office before. Doctor Jackson was one of the first people that she spoke with in detail about her addiction. And, even though it was only five sessions they were very therapeutic.
“You’re right, I did call you for a reason.” She paused. “My urges are coming back stronger than ever.” She spoke just above a whisper like she didn’t want anyone to hear her.
“Really,” Dr. Jackson said. “I pretty much figured that after you stopped your visits here that the problem would continue, but when I’d last seen you I figured that you must’ve been getting help from someone else to help you suppress those urges; especially since you were pregnant and seemed to be in a better space.”
“I didn’t see anyone else. I just fell head over heels in love with my son’s father, Chase Montgomery.” Brooke explained. “And, just loving him helped me suppress most of those feelings.”
Dr. Jackson placed Brooke’s folder back down and picked up a pen and a notepad. “So when did those urges start to come back?”
“Well, they never went away. I was just able to control them, because Chase satisfied me completely.” Brooke admitted with a smile. “But, we’ve been having some problems lately, and up until last week we’ve not been having sex like that.” She added with her smile now completely gone.
“Oh, I see,” Dr. Jackson said with a nod like she understood.
“Yeah,” Brooke sighed. “With him not giving it to me on a daily basis like it was in the beginning, I have been feeling the urge to go out there and get it from someone else.”
“I see,” Dr. Jackson responded while writing in her notepad. “And, of course if you do then you know that you will be cheating on him.” Brooke sat up straight and crossed her arms with a look of annoyance on her face. “You haven’t cheated on him have you?”
Brooke hated the fact that Dr. Jackson had brought that up. It was something that she wanted to forget and leave in her past like everything else. It only happened once and she had never told anyone. A few years back, she and Chase had hit a rough patch in their relationship; sort of like what they were going through now.
She had gone to a club one night alone just to get out of the house. At the club, she’d gotten really drunk and was accompanied by a friendly face that just wanted to make sure that she got home safely since he didn’t want her to drive under the influence. Unfortunately, one thing led to another, and the next thing she knew she was coming on strong and ended up fucking him in the backseat of his car. It was so unexpected for the both of them. But, he had fucked her so good that she ended up going home with him to fuck some more.
Brooke let out a deep breath before she responded. “I hate to admit it, but I have. It’s definitely not something that I want to do again. I love Chase to death. He brings out the best in me.” She paused. “And the worst sometimes,” she added with a sad shake of the head.
“What makes you say that?” Dr. Jackson questioned.
“Because it’s the truth,” Brooke sighed. She got up and started to walk around the office while running her fingers through her hair. “He’s a big producer now and is always surrounded by women. I can’t stand that. I mean, it eats me up inside knowing that he’s around women all of the time. And most of them can’t even sing. Most of them are nothing, but a bunch of hoes that would do anything to get a man like him.” She said frowning up her face like she had a bad taste in her mouth.
Dr. Jackson nodded her head taking in everything that Brooke was saying. She wrote more notes down in her notepad, and then looked back at Brooke. “Do you think that he is cheating on you with some of the women that are at his studio?”
Brooke stopped walking and stood near the window that was facing the outside. From the way that Dr. Jackson’s office sat on the fourth floor, she could look down and see the people walking on the sidewalk and the cars passing by. She observed a happy, young couple coming out of a building that was across the street. They were each holding the hands of a little girl who looked to be around the age of five. Brooke smiled, because it was a reminder of her, Chase and Mason. She could remember a time when they used to be like that. It kind of made her sad, because she realized that they hadn’t done anything as a family in a while. If anything, Chase would always take Mason places without her, because if nothing else; he got in his father, son time. And the week prior when Stacy had brought Mason home, he was already asleep so Chase put him right to bed. They didn’t even get the chance to sit down and eat as a family.
She looked back at the Doctor with sad eyes. “I’m not sure, because he said he isn't, but I think otherwise. I mean, he has cheated on me before.”
“So, he has cheated in the past, too?”
“I strongly believe so.” She answered. “He hasn’t directly come out and said it’s true, but it’s true. He’s not confessing to it, but he’s not denying it, either anymore.”
“I understand,” Dr. Jackson said with a nod of the head. “Have you forgiven him for that?”
“I thought I had, but I guess I really haven’t. I think it’s because he’s still cheating.” Brooke admitted. “And, just the thought of that is what makes me act a fool all of the time. I’m always starting fights with him over stupid stuff and he actually told me the other day that my behavior is pushing him away.”
“Do you think you are?”
Brooke nodded her head not wanting to admit the truth. “I really think I am and it’s killing me, because I can’t lose him.”
Dr. Jackson placed her pen and notepad on the desk. “Brooke, why don’t you come back over here and sit down.” She said. Brooke glanced back out the window for a brief moment before deciding to do what the Doctor asked. “Have you ever thought about telling Chase about your past?” she questioned.
“I’m not doing that.” Brooke quickly responded without even giving it any thought. There was no way in hell that she could reveal her past to Chase. He would most definitely look at her differently and probably would leave her ass for good.
“Why not?” Dr. Jackson asked. “I think it would help your relationship if he knew the truth.”
“How would that help?” Brooke shot looking at Dr. Jackson like she was crazy. “He would think that I’m a hoe.” She shook her head and frowned up her face as she pictured in her head how Chase would react if he knew the truth about her.
“He would understand why you act the way you do.” Dr. Jackson informed her. “Plus, it�
��s not healthy to keep secrets in a relationship.”
“It may not be healthy, but I’m not telling him.” Brooke sat back in the chair and crossed her arms with an attitude. At this point she was ready to go and didn’t even feel like talking anymore.
Dr. Jackson could tell by the way that Brooke’s whole demeanor changed that she had struck a nerve. “It was just a suggestion, Brooke.”
“Yeah a dumb one,” Brooke shot at her. “Do you know how many men that I’ve slept with?” she questioned.
Dr. Jackson shook her head. “No, you never told me.”
“That’s because I don’t even know myself. I’ve been with so many men that I’ve lost count of exactly how many.” She said with frustration in her tone. “And, you really expect me to tell Chase that shit? He is not going to think of it as being an addiction. Don’t no man wanna hear that his woman used to have sex in the restrooms at clubs, back seats of cars, in random parking lots and even in gas stations with total strangers. I don’t think he’d be pleased to know that I was in love with a man that indulged in my sexual fantasies and accompanied me to sex parties. Just because my ex didn’t mind watching another man have intercourse with me, doesn’t mean at all that Chase is about that life.” She said thinking that she and Q used to have so much fun together. She was his down ass bitch and for a long time she actually believed that he loved her.
“You don’t have to tell Chase all of that, but you can tell him that you’re a recovering sex addict. I think that he needs to know that.” Dr. Jackson spoke in a reasonably caring tone. “You’re not going to ever be able to get over your past Brooke, unless you deal with the issues at hand. And, rather you want to believe it or not, your past is affecting the choices and the way you act today.”
“If you say so,” Brooke responded while rolling her eyes. She could care less about the doctor’s advice at this point. “Are we done here?” She questioned while gathering her things to leave.
Dr. Jackson sighed feeling disappointed that Brooke wasn’t trying to understand her point. She looked down at her watch to see the time. Seeing that their session was about over, she decided to just go ahead and end it. “Yes Brooke, we are done. But, I would like for you to come back next Tuesday. Is that okay with you?” She questioned while picking up her appointment calendar.