“The ranch?”
“This house, the one we're standing in.”
“I hate it. It's a constant reminder of my mom.”
He shot me a questioning look.
“She killed herself here. We were at school, but this is where she did it. Downed a bottle of pills. Bradley and I wanted to move to one of the smaller places on the property, but Daddy said no, that we had to stay here as a reminder of what we did to her.”
“What. You. Did.”
“Yeah.” I chuckled and nervously tucked locks of hair behind my ears. “Not him.”
“Fuck, Beks. And you saved his life just now?”
I shook my head. “No, I saved yours.”
His face dropped and went ashen. “I'm tearing it down. You're staying in the main house, and so will your brother when he gets back.”
“What the fuck is going on?” I yelled. “You're scaring me.”
“Good,” he yelled back, then slammed his fist into the wall where Daddy's head had been.
I stumbled back a step. “B,” I whispered in pure terror.
His fury-filled eyes met mine before storming off into the kitchen. Cabinet doors opened and slammed shut.
Inching toward him, I stopped and watched him scavenge.
“Where's his fucking liquor?”
“No. You’re not letting that man break you.”
“Where is it?” he roared.
Anger coursed through my veins. “What the hell is going on?” I walked into the kitchen toward him. He moved to step around, but with a soft hand on his shoulder, he paused. “Brenton, talk to me.”
His head drooped as his hands found my waist. “I don't want to hurt you.”
“You're doing that by not talking to me. What happened? Tell me. Please.”
“Beka?” came Ryder's voice from the other room.
Brows raised, I looked from the door to Brenton.
“I called her.” That was all he said before tugging me against his trembling chest. “I'm so sorry, Rebeka, but you deserve to know.”
“Know what?” I cried and dug my nails into his shoulder, anchoring me to him.
Desperation seeped in at his solid body leaving mine. I wanted his strength back to hear whatever he had to say. Hand in hand, we moved around the small kitchen table and into the living room. Brenton guided me to the couch and gestured for Ryder to join us.
Her tiny hand linked with mine. “What's going on?” she whispered.
“I don't know.”
“He called Kyle and said I needed to get over here as soon as possible, that you needed me.”
I swallowed against a dry throat. The room spun with each short breath.
Brenton paced, staring at the floor before dropping to a crouch at my feet, putting us at eye level.
“Baby….”
“Just say it, Brenton.” Ryder's hand tightened around mine.
“I don't know how,” he choked out before leaning his forehead to my knee. “Pappy left me a note that detailed what happened behind the scenes of that night. I'll let you read it so you understand that neither of us knew the forces that pulled us apart.”
Hating the pure agony in his tone, I dragged a shaking hand through his dark hair.
“I wish that was the worst of it. Dammit, I wish it was. Beks.” His misery-laced eyes met mine with tears rimming the bottom lids. “The wreck didn’t cause you to lose our baby.”
In shock, I pulled back and shook my head. “No, Brenton, it did. The doctors said—”
“Think, baby. Did the doctors say you lost the baby or did your dad?”
Mind racing, I attempted to remember specifics from those terrible days. “I don't… I don't know. Maybe Daddy?”
“They took it from us.”
“I don't—”
“Our fathers decided our baby's fate. Your father told the doctors the baby was conceived under force, and while you lay unconscious, he signed over your rights since you were underage. He gave them consent for termination. And my father paid him to eliminate a future unwanted heir to the Graves estate.”
“No, they wouldn't. You're lying,” I breathed even though I knew he wasn't.
“Beks, I'm so sorry.” Tears dripped down his cheeks to my jeans.
The growing dark spot drew my unfocused gaze.
Brenton spoke.
Ryder wrapped her arms around my shoulders and cried.
But for me?
Not a single tear. No emotion at all. All I could do was focus on breathing and stare at the wet spot on my jeans, at Brenton's tears.
Nothing else mattered. The world slipped. Noises vanished.
And at that moment, I learned what true devastation was.
I was on the verge of a free fall into the darkness I’d somehow kept at bay all these years.
But right now, knowing what they took from me, I dove into the darkness, not caring if I ever came back.
27
Brenton
“Baby?” Desperation laced the single word. “Please say something.”
Hollow eyes shifted to mine, but she didn’t see me. My heart shattered at the emptiness where such life and love had bubbled over just hours ago. I hated hurting her, but she had to know, needed to know the truth of what our fathers had done.
Seconds turned to minutes without her responding to either Ryder’s or my pleas.
“She's in shock,” I said to Ryder, who nodded. Hands under her shoulders and legs, I scooped her off the couch. Clutching the most precious thing in my life close, I stalked to the front door.
“Where are you going?” Ryder asked with pure panic in her voice.
Couldn't blame her.
“Taking her to the main house,” I grunted, shifting her in my arms to turn the doorknob. “I want her out of this fucking place.”
Halfway out the door, Ryder was at my side.
“I had no idea,” I said to her, looking down to the catatonic woman in my eyes. “I don't know what to do.”
A tiny hand rested on my back. “I know you didn't know, and you're doing what you can. When you leave, I'll take care of her. She'll be okay.”
“How do I leave her like this?” At the words, my heart cracked open, spilling out the feelings I'd been holding back. “How do I leave the woman I love who’s fucking breaking apart in my arms?”
Inside the main house, we moved through the expansive halls toward my room. As gentle as possible, I laid her on the unmade bed before pulling the covers over her trembling body. Eyes still open wide, she stared unblinking at the ceiling.
“I'm calling a doctor,” I stated and reached for my phone.
“She needs you,” Ryder said in a soft voice. “Not me, not some strange doctor. You.”
“Give us a few minutes.” I toed off my boots.
“I'll be in the kitchen when you need me.”
I nodded without looking at her as I crawled up the bed. The thick pillow gave to the weight of my head as I lay down beside Beks. Entirely still, only her soft breaths told me she was alive.
“Beks,” I whispered in a plea. “Please talk to me. Anything.”
Nothing. Not even a stolen glance.
At a loss, I slung an arm and leg over her and hugged her close.
“I love you. I’m in love with you,” I said with my lips against her shoulder. “I've always loved you. Don't leave. Don't give up. Please. Don't give up on us, not now. I need you, baby. Don’t you see that? You’re the only good in my life, the only one who sees me. Come back to me. Please, please come back to me.”
Only her quiet, even breaths responded to my shattering heart.
Me: How is she?
Ryder: Not good.
Me: Seen her father around?
Ryder: Nope. Nobody has.
Me: Take care of her, please. I hate not being there.
Ryder: She’s in good hands.
Me: But not mine.
Me: Any progress?
Ryder: A little. She's finally talking t
o the doctor you hired.
Ryder: I think she misses you.
Me: I miss her, but we've been called out to a mission. Not sure when I'll be back.
Me: Take care of her, okay?
Me: I get email over there, so email with any updates.
Ryder: Be safe. And she'll be fine, just needs time.
Ryder: It's only been three days. Give her a bit to adjust.
Me: I hate not being there. Hate her being in pain. Hate she has to go through this.
Ryder: I don't know how in the hell you ever thought you didn't love her.
Ryder: Are you always so dense?
Ryder: Maybe Beka is better off without you.
Me: You're kidding, right?
Ryder: Maybe. Did I tell you I called off the wedding?
Me: Did I ask?
Ryder: No, but with Beka still not super chatty, I have to tell someone. You're the lucky guy.
Me: I don't feel lucky.
Ryder: Anyhoo, I'm staying with Beka. Moved out of Kyle's place.
Me: Okay.
Ryder: You suck as a chitchat buddy.
Me: Does that surprise you? Email me with updates, and I'll try to fly in when we get back.
Ryder: I'll let her know.
I held my breath as the gate to the ranch swung open.
Four months.
Four long months since I stepped foot on this property. Since I left Beks in the hands of her best friend and the best therapist in Odessa. Somehow the heat had intensified while I was gone, making the short walk from the Tahoe to the main house miserable.
“Hello?” I called out after shutting the front door, but no one answered. “Beks? Ryder?”
Footsteps sounded against the hardwood.
“Welcome back.” Bradley smiled when he rounded the corner.
“I should say the same to you. Heard you’ve been back a couple of weeks.” The rehab center had given daily updates on his progress and when he'd completed the program. “How do you feel?”
“Good,” he said with a smile. “Great even. I know it's a long road, but to be this clearheaded is fucking fantastic.”
“Has your father tried to come by?”
Bradley shifted on his feet. “No. We don't know where he is. No one’s seen him since the day I dropped him at the motel. Can't say I'm sad about it.”
In full understanding, I gave a quick nod. “Where's your sister?” Why beat around the bush; not like I was there to see him.
His smile widened. “In the barn taking inventory of the supplies. She's come alive since you hired her as the full-time vet for the ranch. Thanks for everything you did, man. Really, thank you.”
I nodded and turned for the door.
The familiar scent of hay and manure filled my nose the moment I stepped into the barn. A few horses watched as I stalked toward the supply room in search of the woman I couldn't get off my mind.
The past four months had been torture. Access to email was slim where we were, and even then Ryder wasn't the best at communicating what was going on. All she said in the last email was I needed to get my ass back to Texas as soon as possible.
So here I was.
I wasn’t stateside for more than a few hours when I requested emergency leave. That was three hours ago, which meant I had twenty-one hours to figure out what was going on here and get my ass back to Kentucky.
Beks’s voice filtered through the otherwise quiet barn. “What are you doing in here? You should be on this other shelf with your friends. See, all the antibiotics go there, and you go here with your vitamin friends.”
A shoulder on the doorframe, I watched her work as she talked to herself. A soothing sense of relief calmed my ticking temper at the mere sight of her. Damn, I missed her. For the first time in months, I could breathe.
“I didn't know vitamins had friends,” I said.
Her hands stilled midair. Achingly slow, she turned to lock those bright honey brown eyes with mine.
“You're here,” she breathed. Wide-eyed, she held the clipboard tight to her chest and smiled.
The distance between us felt like a canyon. “Is that a good thing?”
The clipboard clattered to the ground, her boot heels pounding against the stained concrete floors as she ran full speed and leaped into my outstretched arms.
“It's a great thing. I missed you.”
Capturing her lips with mine, I sighed at the intense connection between us. Damn, I missed this.
“I missed you too, baby,” I said against her lips. “I'm leaving the army.”
The words shocked her, and me. It wasn't until right then that I knew for sure this place was my home. She was my home. Yes, I loved my job, but Beks was my anchor, my life. This was where I belonged.
“What?” Beks pulled back to lay her head against the wall, eyes searching mine. “Why would you do that? You love it.”
“I love you more,” I whispered. “These past few months have killed me. Every day apart from you, a piece of the man I want to be, the man I am when I'm around you, went dormant. You make me whole in ways I can't describe.”
The course pads of my thumbs brushed away her silent tears.
“I love you, Rebeka Harding, and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you. I want to build a family and give our children what we never had. You and me, together, happy, and hopelessly devoted to each other.”
“Is that a proposal?” She sniffed with a trembling smile.
“I don't have a ring.” Dammit, I should've thought of that on the way here, but I was too damn excited to see her. A ring was the last thing on my mind.
“Sir Fancy Pants, I don't need a ring. All I need is you.” Her heart hammered from her chest to mine. A broad smile crept up her cheeks, creasing the edges of her almond-shaped eyes.
“You're killing me. Is that a yes?”
“Yes, Brenton. It's a yes.”
Beks’s sweet lips molded around mine and parted at the begging request for access. For several minutes we clung to each other, savoring the connection. Soon every day would be with this perfect woman. I’d have the internal peace she offered me, and I wouldn’t allow one day to pass from this point forward without telling her what she meant to me.
We were both broken in our own ways, but together we were whole. And hopefully one day we could continue the healing by giving our children the love and unconditional support we were never afforded.
One day.
“Brenton?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Were you serious about the family part?”
Brows raised, I tilted my head, not understanding.
“Because it's a little late to go back now.”
I narrowed my eyes and shook my head. “I don't understand what you're telling me.”
“I'm telling you….” Her chest rose and fell in a deep breath. “I'm pregnant.”
The world stilled, the noise of the barn falling silent as I gaped down into her uncertain eyes. Fear, excitement, uncertainty, and soul-consuming happiness sank in. The corners of my lips tugged my cheeks up until they couldn't rise any higher.
Pregnant.
“Really?”
“Really. Are you okay with that?”
Pulling her close, I tucked her head to my chest and stroked down her dark curly hair. “Do you hear that?”
Beks’s head moved up and down.
“That's the sound of a heart exploding.”
Two arms snaked around my waist and squeezed.
Coarse hair tickled my lips as I whispered into her ear, “I can't wait to spend the rest of my life thanking you for saving me.”
“I know one way you could start,” she said with a flex of her hips against my crotch.
“So bossy,” I grumbled with a smile as I stepped into the supply closet and slammed the door closed.
Forever with this woman.
Sounded like a damn perfect life to me.
Epilogue
“But I’m not due for two more
weeks.” My voice broke at the last word giving away my rising fear. “Brenton isn’t even here. She can’t come today.” I was an idiot for not going to Kentucky with B. What was I thinking wanting to stay here just because it was familiar? Going into labor early was always a possibility, but I never thought it would happen. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Now here I was going into labor with my husband states away. Husband was still strange to say even in my thoughts. But I guess that was natural considering it had only been a few months since he proposed and later that day stood before the Justice of the Peace.
Bending over my round belly as far as I could toward my crotch I yelled, “You can’t come out today. Go back in there.”
“It doesn’t work that way sweetie,” Ryder said with a nervous laugh at the end. “Come on we have to get you to the hospital. I don’t want the wrath of your husband if you have this baby in the car.”
“No. I’m not going without him.”
“Beka….” she groaned. “Stop it with this stupid shit. You know we have to go so stop being difficult. You’re not having this baby here.”
I crossed both arms across my chest and leaned further into the couch just as another contraction hit making my face contort in pain. “Fuck this hurts,” I cried. “I need Brenton.”
When I finally peeled my eyes open, Bradley stood over me staring down with concern and determination behind his gaze.
“I’m not going without him,” I whispered.
“You don’t have a choice sis. Hate to break it to you, but nature doesn’t give a shit if your husband is here or not. My niece is coming today and not in this fucking house. Now get your ass off the couch and into the truck. I already have the seat warm for you.”
Stupid hormones had tears leaking from my eyes at his thoughtfulness.
“Here,” Ryder shoved her cell phone against my ear. “Maybe you’ll listen to him.”
Knowing who was on the other end of the line, I sat up straighter and cleared my throat. “Where are you?”
“Beks I swear on everything we own I will kick your fine ass if you don’t get in the fucking truck right now,” Brenton said calmly. But I heard the undercurrent of worry and frustration. He was my husband after all.
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