This whole conversation left Holly feeling like a child who wanted to crawl under the furniture and hide out after being caught doing something bad. “You’ll be refunded every single cent.”
Victoria turned around and headed to the door. “Have a nice life Ms. Sparks. I hope one day you find what you’re looking for.”
A sick feeling of dread constricted in the pit of Holly’s stomach, making her want to throw up. She took a deep breath and sank into a desk chair. After weeks of thought and consideration, she knew there was only one thing left to do.
***
That same afternoon, Holly burst through the doors of Dr. Adams office in a whirlwind style. The doctor was in the middle of coaching over two dozen participates who stared back at Holly like fish in a fishbowl—transfixed, but without understanding. Holly really didn’t care what these people thought. Her matter at that moment was more important than the so-called relationship crisis’s these people believed to be in.
Holly held back tears and commanded, “I need to talk to you right this instant.”
“What? Have you lost your mind?” The old woman contemplated dragging Holly out by the ear. “I'm in the middle of something if you haven’t already noticed.”
Holly turned away and continued to fight back tears. “This can't wait.”
Dr. Adams rose from her seat and with an agitated sigh said to her followers, “Please excuse me while I take care of some business.”
The doctor slammed her office door shut and asked, “What’s the meaning of all this? You can’t just barge in whenever you feel like it and interrupt my business.”
“I, I—” With her eyes brimming with salty tears, Holly looked up at the ceiling. “I can't do the experiment anymore.”
“Well, now—” Dr. Adams crossed her arms. “That's not in our agreement is it? You still have one month left.”
“I don't care about the money. I quit.”
“Holly, I warned you from the very beginning that you were not supposed to get emotionally involved with any of these men. Now look at you—you’re a complete mess.”
When it came to her feelings for Jake there was so much detail that Holly had intentionally kept from the good doctor. Now she had no choice but to face her transgressions.
“I didn’t want to tell you about any of this. I was hoping that maybe after this whole thing was over, Jake and I could legitimately be together. Instead, everything back fired on me.”
“Wait a minute—you went against my word when I specifically told you not to?”
“Well, it wasn’t like I planned for this to happen.”
“Okay, let’s put all this to the side for a moment. First of all, you need to calm down and rethink your decision. Would you really give up a million-dollars because of one meaningless, so-called relationship?”
“That’s where you’re wrong, Dr. Adams.” Holly looked down at the floor, ashamed for being so dishonest with herself and the doctor. “What I had with Jake wasn’t meaningless. It was as real as you standing here in front of me at this very moment.”
Dr. Adams stood back and crossed her arms again, displeased and unconvinced by what she was hearing. “Well, this is a far cry from what you reported to me a few months ago.”
“I was never completely honest with you. I thought I could work around my feelings.” Small rivulets of tears ran down Holly’s cheeks like trails of raindrops on a windowpane. “I’ve thought long and hard about this decision for weeks now. I know in my heart that I can’t go through with this experiment any longer. I’m so sorry.”
With those final words, Holly walked out and tried to rid her mind of her shamefulness.
***
January 22, 2014
At week later at a local coffee house, Holly and Emma did some catching up. Emma had shown up with baby Steven Tyler who was resting comfortably in his stroller beside their table. He still had that newborn appearance: a bald cue-ball head—scrawny and blotchy-faced.
“He's so precious.” Holly smiled as she watched the baby sleep. His tiny nostrils flared ever so slightly with each breath. “So, when are you coming back to work, huh?”
“Actually, I'm anxious to get back to it soon. My mother is supposed to come down and help me any day now,” Emma said. “When that happens, I’m officially back on the job.”
Holly took a sip from her coffee cup and replied, “Ah, this news is going to break Todd’s heart.”
“That reminds me in a weird, unfavorable way—any word from you know who?”
Despite the harmless intent of the question, the subject matter had Holly feeling despondent. “At this point, he’s never going to speak to me again. We all just have to accept that it’s over between us, okay?”
“So what about the experiment?” Emma asked.
“Done with that too.” Holly shook her head in despair. “I sent that cool mil straight down the drain.”
At that very moment, someone Holly had no desire to talk to intruded upon the two.
“Hey, Holly,” Madelyn said a bit too cheerfully, as though there was no bad blood between them. “Do you have a minute?”
After losing Jake, Victoria renouncing her membership, and bailing out on Dr. Adams, one more face-off really couldn’t do anymore damage. “Yeah, sure. Whatever.”
Emma felt it was her cue to leave. “Well, I have to get going.” She really had no desire to be stuck in the middle of World War III.
“Emma!” Holly said, affronted by her abruptness to bail and leave her alone with this psychotic woman.
“Sorry, got to run. I'll call you.” Emma wheeled the stroller out of the coffee house so fast that the two front wheels almost went straight up in the air.
“So what do you want?” Holly asked, unable to make eye contact with Madelyn. “You here to harass me?”
Madelyn sat down in front of her. “No. I just wanted to talk.”
“Yeah right,” Holly said with a snort. She finally managed to bring herself to look at Madelyn. She wore a dark-blue jumpsuit and her hair was braided to the side. “Talk? You mean brag, boast, and flaunt that you’re dating my ex-boyfriend?”
“No. I mean talk, really,” Madelyn said steadily. “Look, I read your latest blog entry and I'm really sorry you had to call it off with “J.” You seemed so happy.”
“Oh, that’s real cute.” Holly stood up, ready to leave. “Excuse me, but I have better things to do than be the subject of your juvenile antics.”
Holly’s unjust tone sent a sharp pang of hurt shooting through Madelyn’s core. “No, please. I'm being serious.”
The wounded look in Madelyn’s eyes, her somber expression, suggested that maybe she really wasn’t looking to stir up drama. Holly decided to sit back down. “Okay, what’s the point of all this?”
“Believe it or not, I was actually jealous of the relationship you had with “J.” I think all your readers were. You made it seem like you had some fairytale romance where you met the perfect guy that everyone dreams about.”
“It was a fairytale, Madelyn. The relationship was all a game—just a hoax.”
“No, not to your readers.” Madelyn hesitated for a moment. “You’ll probably be surprised when I tell you this, but I broke it off with Matthew.”
“What? You broke it off with him?”
“Well, obviously you knew I was only dating him to get back at you, but that’s beside the point. The man thinks he's some prize to be won and I couldn’t take it anymore.”
The comment made Holly laugh aloud. “Oh, yes. That sounds like Matthew all right.”
“It was like just because he’d take me out or buy me things, he thought he had the upper hand.”
“Yeah,” Holly said, envisioning her past with her ex-boyfriend, “he can be a major alpha male sometimes.”
“Not only that, but my kids hated him,” Madelyn mentioned, crossing her eyeballs together in frustration.
The humorous, contorted expression on Madelyn’s face made Holly realiz
e that life was too short to hold grudges. “I bet they did.”
“What really irritated me the most was that he would always in some way or another mention you.”
“Me?” Holly asked, surprised. “Well, he was the one to break it off, so I don’t get that.”
“Matthew never failed to bring something up that you've done in the past and it always had to be negative.”
“For some unknown reason, he is bitter about my blog.”
“Yes, exactly, like how much he dislikes your blog, or how he thinks you are so in love with yourself. Honestly, at times he sounded so jealous of you.”
Holly shook her head in disappointment. “Seems to me that Matthew has some issues he needs to work on before he gets into another relationship.”
“Well, he may be handsome and rich, but in a spiritual sense, we didn't connect at all.”
Holly paused before she asked bluntly, “So—did you sleep with him?”
Madelyn guffawed. “Psssf, even that part wasn’t that good.”
Madelyn and Holly laughed aloud as if they were sharing some inside joke, which in a sense, they were.
“Matthew claims to have the moves like Jagger, if you know what I mean,” Holly jeered.
“Girl, seriously, someone needs to deflate that ego of his,” Madelyn said, bursting into laughter.
“Whew. I’m glad I’m not the only one who was somewhat disappointed in that department.”
“Well, he has potential. He just has to stop making it all about himself in bed.”
“Okay—let’s get off this subject. It’s kind of grossing me out, knowing that we’ve slept with the same guy.”
“You’re right.” Madelyn had to catch her breath after laughing so hard. “So moving on, I hope we can let bygones be bygones. I don't want us to go on hating each other just because we can't live with each other.”
After everything she’d been through, Holly didn’t have room left in her heart for hostility. “You know what? Apology accepted.”
***
February 2, 2014
Holly was about to head out to her father's birthday party when she got an unexpected visitor at her door.
“Hello. Would you happen to be Holly Sparks?” asked the stranger. He was dressed professionally in a dark blue business suit. Holly guessed him to be in his fifties. He had graying hair and the smattering of white in his goatee.
“Yes. How can I help you?” she asked, caught off guard.
“Oh good. I'm Jeffery Davenport.” He offered her a business card. Holly hesitated for a brief moment and then took it. “I’m a producer at CBS radio in Los Angeles. I was wondering if you had a minute to chat?”
Holly had no clue as to why someone from CBS would want to talk to her. “Uh, sure. Please come in.”
“I’m sorry to show up unannounced. I dropped by your office earlier today, but you were out at the time. A very flamboyant gentleman told me I might find you here.”
Of course, it wasn’t hard to figure out whom he was talking about. “Please have a seat,” Holly said, directing him to the living room.
Mr. Davenport settled himself into an armchair in front of Holly as she took a seat on the couch. “So obviously you’re wondering why I'm here.”
“Maybe just a little curious,” Holly answered with a bit of sarcasm.
“Well, the president of CBS radio was introduced to your blog not too long ago.”
“Really?” Holly asked, more than surprised. “By whom?”
“A lady by the name of Dr. Catherine Adams. Do you happen to know her?”
Holly shook her head in amusement. “Yes. All too well, I’m afraid.”
“Well, Mrs. Perkins, the president of CBS radio, was so impressed with your blog that she and the producers came up with a concept they were interested in pitching to you.”
“Uh—a concept for what?”
“To be frank, CBS is interested in giving you your own radio show where listeners and callers seek dating and relationship advice.”
“A radio show?” Holly repeated. She wanted to make sure that she had heard him correctly.
“Yes. We’d be interested in having you on the air two-nights a week, if that would work for you.”
Holly had to pinch herself to make sure that she wasn’t dreaming. “I'm sorry. I’m a little shocked.” She paused to collect her overactive thoughts. “I, I…well, I never dreamed I'd be offered something like this.”
Jeffery smiled reassuringly and met Holly’s eyes. “The executives think you'd be a hit, especially with the following you have.”
“But I've never done a radio show or been on the radio for that matter. I have no experience.”
“I can assure you that we have people there to help you.”
“Wow—me?” Holly asked, mystified. “Really? My own radio show?”
“Yes.” This time he smiled amusingly. “Your own radio show.”
“I'd have to be some kind of idiot to pass this up, right?”
Mr. Davenport chuckled, appreciating her humbleness. “So I’ll take that as you’re interested?”
“Oh, sir. I’m more than interested.”
***
Holly’s friends, family and everyone at the office, were ecstatic about the new radio show in the works. It was hard for her to believe that in a matter of weeks, she'd be an on air radio personality and CBS had even written her a fat check in advance. As soon as Holly had signed on the dotted line, the studio had started promoting the hell out of her upcoming nighttime program.
“You've hit the big time girly, girl.” Todd sat on Holly’s desk day dreaming about their new famed future together. “My best friend, an actual radio talk show host. No shit.”
Holly was a bit distracted by an unopened certified piece of mail from Dr. Adams. She continued to stare at it wildly, as if at any minute it would explode in her face. For over an hour, Holly contemplated opening the envelope. For all she knew, it was court documents and she might have a huge lawsuit on her hands.
“Yeah. Uh-huh—sure,” Holly said, barely paying attention to Todd.
“You didn't even hear a word I just said, did you?” Todd asked. “And why do you keep staring at that dang envelope like a freaking zombie?”
“Huh?”
“Never mind. You're hopeless.” Todd waved her off and walked back to his desk.
Either way, she eventually had to find out what was inside the envelope. With her heart racing, she slowly tore the envelope open like she was parting silk along a seam. There was no letter attached, just a blank sheet of paper wrapped around a check, a check written out in the amount of, ONE-MILLION DOLLARS. Holly gawked at the check in disbelief with her mouth slightly askew. She nearly forgot how to breathe. She had been certain that Dr. Adams wanted nothing to do with her after she bailed out on the experiment. They hadn’t said a word to each other since that time. There has to be some mistake, this can’t be right. Holly glanced at Dr. Adams signature at the bottom of the check for the tenth time. The pay-to-the-order of, with her full name written in smudgy black ink, made it visibly clear that this was no joke. It was the second time that week where she thought she was dreaming. As much as she would have loved to cash that check and go on a much-needed shopping spree, she fought with feelings of right and wrong. In her mind, she felt undeserving of this money. It was wrong of her to even entertainment the idea of keeping it when she knew there were people out there who needed that money much more than she did.
***
Lately, Jake had been busting his ass with do-it-yourself projects around the group home. Anything that helped him to stop thinking about, Darlene—Holly or whatever her name was, he considered a good distraction. Though it had been over a month, the memory of Holly still lingered. Indeed, it had only intensified and revived in his mind when he was reminded of all the heartache and embarrassment she had caused him. He considered himself a fool for falling in love with a woman whose intentions and affections turned out to be complet
ely disingenuous.
That afternoon, Jake was on a ladder in the kitchen, scraping mold off the ceiling.
“So it comes out to around two-thousand to fix those water stained base boards in the bathroom,” said Jake’s ruddy looking general contractor.
Jake took a couple of steps down from the ladder. “Unfortunately, I don’t have the money right now. Besides, I have a whole other list of repairs before that one.”
The group home was falling apart piece-by-piece. Whenever Jake patched a hole in the wall or fixed a leaky pipe, he could almost bet that something else would malfunction. It got to the point where he just didn’t have the funds to keep replacing everything. Just recently, the stove decided to take a dump and as soon as it was replaced, one of the showerheads had sprung a leak.
“Jake! Mail!” Martha set a legal sized envelope down on the kitchen counter, along with some junk mail.
Jake stepped off the ladder and looked down at the letter. There was no return address posted, which probably meant it was nothing more than a fancy piece of junk mail. Something in the back of his mind told him to open it anyway. Inside, he found a letter attached with a check:
Jake,
I know you can’t stand the sight of me right now and I swear after you read this you will never hear from me again. As you may have already figured out, I have enclosed a check along with this letter. The money was part of my “project,” but there’s no way in my right mind that I can accept it. I’m hoping that, in some way, this will ease the heartache I have caused you. Maybe someday you will find it in your heart to forgive me? Please take this money and do what you do best— help those in need. Just know that I still love you and I’ll never forget you. My wish for you is that you’ll find someone who will love you the way you loved me.
Love,
Holly
Jake nearly kneeled over after he finally looked at the amount of the check. His eyes had to be playing tricks on him. There was no way was he seeing the amount of: one-million dollars. He took a few moments to control the delirium quickly building up inside of him. Thoughts ran through his mind like traffic on a busy interstate. He didn’t know whether to feel happy, disgusted or relieved after everything she’d done to him. In a way, it felt inappropriate to take the money. On the other hand, it was like some sign where she seemed to perform yet another one of her miracles when he least expected it.
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