I opened the closet to change out of my jeans and black shirt (I dressed the part at work). My eyes caught the Halloween costume I had on that night. I furiously pushed it to the corner of the closet and refused to look at it again. I grabbed a shirt that Rowena gave me for our one-year anniversary and painfully put it on. I couldn’t stand to look at myself for more than a second in the mirror. Everything reminded me of her, but I knew I had to somehow move on with my life. The only questions were — when and how?
I got in my ol’ VW Cabrio and drove to Rowena’s house. The two story brick split level sat in a cul-de-sac ominously overlooking the woods behind it. I focused on the front door and anxiously made my way up the steps. I hesitated, then knocked.
“Coming!” I heard Lil yell. I hoped the night would fly by, and I’d be on my way back home before long.
“Hey, Dashielle!” she happily greeted then flew her arms around my neck.
“Hi,” I said flatly.
“I’m so glad you decided to come. Mom is making beef stew. She remembered it was your favorite.”
She was right that it was my favorite, but it was only my favorite because it was Rowena’s favorite.
Lil led me into the living room and joined me on the couch.
“So, what have you been up to? I’ve been listening to your show every day. It’s really awesome,” she said in an unusually high and particularly annoying voice.
“Thanks,” I muttered. I glanced around the room and noticed that Mrs. Snow had undergone a semi-remodel. The curtains were different, there were new coffee and end tables, the walls had been painted, even the family pictures had been re-framed. I walked to the mantle to take a closer look and to escape from Lil’s personal bubble invasion.
“Where’s Rowena?” I asked while scanning the pictures.
“Umm… well… Mom’s therapist suggested that taking down her photos might help with her difficulty getting over what happened.” I gave her a you’re-kidding-me-right look. “Temporarily,” she interjected.
The absurdity and cruelty of her mother erasing Rowena from the house made me want to walk out right then, and I almost did until I saw an apparently overlooked remnant of her. Rowena had dabbled in quilting for only a month before she gave it up, and she only completed one throw pillow. And there it sat on the Victorian chair that had once been her grandmother’s. I traced the hand-stitched outline of the squares, remembering her focused and sometimes frustrated face as she weaved the thread in and out.
“It’s ready!” Mrs. Snow yelled. She walked into the room. Her brown hair was freshly dyed, not a gray in sight, which was a rarity for her. She wore an apron I had never seen her in before. To be honest, she looked prettier than I recalled. I guess the house wasn’t the only thing undergoing a remodel.
We all sat at the table, with Mr. Snow sitting silently at one end, Mrs. Snow on the other, and Lil and I on either side. The constant smiling face of Lil increased my agitation, but I tried to ignore it.
“I’ve heard that your radio show is doing well?” Mr. Snow asked, attempting to start conversation.
“Yes, sir. It’s being turned into a podcast now. Everyone at the station is pretty excited at the public’s interest.”
“That’s wonderful. I know Rowena wanted it so badly for you…” Mrs. Snow’s voice trailed. Mr. Snow coughed.
“It’ll be the only other podcast I listen to besides Jacob and Wilhelm’s. It would be so cool if you ever got to meet them someday. You’d have to bring me along.” Lil smiled.
“I’m not even sure where they broadcast from, so…” I answered. “I see you’re remodeling…” I directed my attention to Mrs. Snow.
“Yeah. The doctor thinks it best, but I don’t really know that it’s working. Nothing really works. I just take it one day at a time. What about you, Dashielle? How are you taking things?” Her voice grew concerned and serious, which made me a little anxious. My own mother hadn’t even asked me that. No one had, for fear I’d actually answer. Most people just avoided her name and anything that may steer my thoughts in her direction, as if they needed help going there anyway.
“I’m okay,” was all I could get out.
“I think it will just take time.”
Mr. Snow changed the subject to sports, even though he knew I had no interest at all in anything involving a ball. I tried to amuse him the best I could since the awkwardness would be worse if we weren’t talking.
After dinner, Mrs. Snow asked us to sit in the living room while she prepared coffee and pie. Mr. Snow shortly excused himself and went to the garage outside.
“I miss her, you know?” Lil finally broke the silence.
“Me too.”
“Sometimes I think I’m going to walk in the house and see her reading in her favorite chair over there. She was such a nerd.” We laughed a little. She really was sort of nerdy.
“I dream about her sometimes,” I blurted before thinking.
“Really? What about?”
“It’s weird. It’s never the same. She’s always somewhere different. She’s always wearing the costume she had on that night. No make-up. I don’t recognize the place or anything. I’m never with her. It’s just as if I’m watching her in this other life.” I shook my head, realizing how ridiculous this must sound to her. “Silly, right?”
“Not at all. It’s normal to dream about those you miss.” She came over to me and kneeled on the floor in front me. My fingers traced the stitches of Rowena’s pillow again, while my eyes rebelliously traced the curvature of Lil’s cleavage. I looked away, disgusted with myself.
“Why don’t you come by here and see me more often?” she asked looking at me with her head cocked. She placed her hands on each of my knees, which sent a chill down my spine. It feels good to be touched again. Memories of Rowena and I clouded my mind, making it hard to focus. I looked down at Lil’s longing face. Her eyes calling out to me — those same green eyes that Rowena had or were they? I thought Lil’s eyes were blue?
She’s a part of Rowena. The only part that’s left, besides her parents. Before I could fully understand my mind’s musings, Lil moved her blonde hair, revealing her overly exposed bosom in a black bra and sweater. My eyes tried to divert again, but it was too late. She leaned up and kissed me. The shock of it made it hard for me to react.
The strange mix of emotions whirling inside crippled me. It felt nice to be kissed. The warmth of lips meeting mine had been something I’d been missing. But I also felt guilty — something inside of me raged. It was as if Rowena’s beautiful eyes were burning on me in this very moment. Haunted, I thought. There was also anger at Lil for taking advantage of me in my vulnerable state. When I distinguished this, I pulled back.
“What’s the matter?” she whispered, her lips still close in anticipation of another kiss.
“Stop. Just stop. I can’t do this.” I stood up and headed for the door.
“Why not, Dashielle? You and I have always had a flirtation, and it’s been months. Rowena would want you to be happy.”
Her Barbie look and expression sent shivers down my spine. I hated plastics.
“You can never replace her,” I said bitterly. “Besides, you’re too young.”
“Age is just a number, and I turned seventeen a month ago. You’re only three years older. My parents love you. They wouldn’t object.”
She walked slowly closer to me, tugged at my jacket, and stared at me. Those same eyes. Confusion hit me like a semi, and I couldn’t stop myself from wanting comfort, compassion, and touch. Any feeling would be preferable to the cold sadness of the past few months. She leaned in, and we kissed.
Chapter 11
Somehow Chester had convinced Rose to lay off the questions, and what a relief that was. She made me nervous. There was something about her that I didn’t trust. And after staying with her those few days, I found her behavior to be more and more erratic. She would be happy one minute and furious the next. Her mood swings and my lack of sleep were making
for an explosive mix.
Every night I lay awake listening to the sound of the wolf outside. The silence-shattering howl made the hair on the back of my neck stand at attention. Terrifying. I would dream of it tearing down the door and ravaging the insides of the cottage. What it did to the men on the road, and what it did to Rose’s lovely face made me queasy.
We sat at the table silently with coffee warming our fingers.
“We need to find you some more clothes,” Chester said to me.
“These are fine, really.”
“They know what you are wearing, stupid,” Rose mumbled. I nodded in defeat.
“Rose, do you have anything she may borrow?”
“As if I’m ever going to get it back?”
“Excuse me. Do you have anything that she may have?” Chester rephrased.
She violently pushed her chair from the table and stomped away.
“It’s okay, really,” I whispered and placed my hand on his. He looked down at it, smiled, but pulled away.
He got up and found his way back to Rose’s bedroom. I could hear the two of them continue their fight in there. I didn’t want to wear anything of Rose’s. It may somehow rub her witchiness on me.
I continued to sit there miserably. I wanted to be close to Chester, but he was adamant about our keeping distance in Rose’s house. And while I understood and respected that, I was much more immature about my feelings and my ability to restrain them.
“Here. Put this on,” Chester said, walking in with a beautiful yellow dress.
“It’s pretty. I’m sure Rose has something less fancy she’d be willing to give up.”
“I gave it to her. She’s never even worn it. She didn’t like it, said that it was too frilly or something.” His serious voice saddened me.
“Thank you,” I said, taking the dress from him and retreating joyfully to the bathing room. I prepared and took my bath. I placed my hair halfway up, letting the chestnut curls flow freely, and attempted to put on my dress. The dress had a corseted undergarment. That left me with two options — ask Rose or Chester for help. Rose would have certainly suffocated me with it.
“Chester, would you come here a moment?” He knocked as he reached the door. “Come in,” I said.
He came in and instantly covered his eyes.
“I need help with the corset,” I whispered. I stood there in my white bloomers, which were semi-transparent in the sunlight that flooded through the window. Awkwardly, I held the corset over me, which made my chest bulge at the sides. His face flustered, and he hurriedly shut the door behind him.
He came to me. His eyes and mind focused on the task. He pulled the ribbons gently, his fingers brushing the smooth flesh that the corset exposed. My heart began to race. There was something incredibly sexy about this moment, and I knew he thought so too. He pulled until the corset reshaped my bosom into two perky mounds that sat much higher than before. I turned to him. We were alone, and I knew that this was some sort of milestone in our relationship. His pale face was now pink with blush. Both our hearts raced. We stared at one another for a moment, neither of us really knowing what to do. Finally, he put his hands on my waist, pulled me closer, and kissed me. We embraced for minutes, it seemed.
I heard the door open. We stopped and froze. Rose’s fierce eyes absolved the room of our passion until she hurried away.
“Oh, God,” I whispered.
Chester didn’t say anything. He rushed after her. I heard the front door open and close twice. I stood there wondering what it would be like to kiss Chester without the restraints. It’s probably best that they are there, I decided, since I didn’t trust my self-control around him. I was too drawn to him.
I finished dressing and found my seat in the living room. They hadn’t made it far from the house before their fight erupted. At first, I resisted looking out the window, but who was I kidding? The curiosity of the human nature was a beast I had no intention of fighting. I leaned on the couch, peaking out the small window’s waved glass.
“I cannot believe you kissed her in my house!”
“I’m sorry, Rose. I know it wasn’t very considerate. I don’t know what got into us. I’m so sorry.”
I understood and wanted to be respectful of Rose’s feelings, but if she didn’t open a closed door none of this would be happening. Yet still, I did feel sad for her.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she cried.
“I didn’t know what to tell you. Rowena and I haven’t even discussed it. We are just attracted to one another.”
This caught me off guard. I had been thinking Chester had explained to Rose that we were sort of a couple because of the obvious jealous comments she’s made. If she just thought I was a friend and was that jealous, I didn’t want to know how she’d treat me had she known.
“I want the both of you out!”
I saw that coming.
“Pack your things,” Chester said as he walked in the living room.
I placed my old clothes in my satchel and was ready to go in minutes. Rose stood at the door quietly, red-faced. I could see fresh tears still wet on her face, but the anger appeared to be gone. Chester was still in his room.
“Here I wanted you to have this,” she whispered, pulling a beautiful red rose from her hair.
“Is it from your garden?” I asked.
“Yes. I thought it would look pretty with your new dress,” she whispered. “Peace offering?”
I smiled, took it from her, and placed it just over my ear like she had worn it.
“Thank you. For everything.”
She nodded and then retreated to the kitchen.
“Come on,” Chester said as he rushed by me. He didn’t even hesitate. He walked out of the door and down the path without ever looking back at Rose or her cottage. He held my hand tighter than necessary, but I endured it. The anger he felt was still hot on his face.
“Where are we going?” I finally asked.
“We’re going to camp tonight, and then I’m going to figure out something.”
The thought that he didn’t know where we were going from here scared me a little. Days before, all these people were after me. There’s no reason to think they still weren’t looking for me. Being in the woods exposed was both frightening and cold.
We walked for hours until I thought my legs would just break off. The cold seeped through my velvet coat, and I couldn’t help but complain.
“Please. Let’s stop for the night. I’m really tired.”
He finally conceded. He gathered firewood while I rested on a rock.
“We shouldn’t have done that,” he said while stacking the wood.
“I know. But…”
“No buts. That was wrong, and I can’t believe I allowed it,” he said.
“Allowed it? We couldn’t help it. We have been suppressing our feelings for days out of respect for her. The door was closed. She shouldn’t of come in,” my voice raised in frustration.
“It doesn’t matter. We were wrong for giving into our desires.” He lit the fire, sat back, and stared at it.
“Were we, really?” I asked. I went to him, placed my hands on his face, and kissed him passionately. We finally knew what it felt like to be together without restraints. We kissed off and on the entire night and snuggled next to the fire. He never got “fresh” (as my mom would call it). His hands stayed gentlemanly, but the passion was no less intense.
I took the rose from my hair and twirled it between my fingers. It’s wet, ruby petals shined in the moons’ light. I pulled it closer, with the intention of smelling it.
“What are you doing with that?” Chester said as he snatched it from my fingers.
“Rose gave it to me.”
“Have you smelled it?” He looked at me anxiously.
“I was just about to before you…”
“But you haven’t? Right?” He panicked.
“No. Why?”
“That’s Rose’s gift. Remember I told you that everyone here
has one? Hers is growing poisonous roses. One sniff can paralyze you for weeks, even years.”
He threw it into the woods as far as he could and hugged me tightly.
He drew me closer to him, his passion seemingly rising from the scare. The night’s cold set in deeper. Our tired bodies couldn’t resist sleep nestled in one another’s arms. This was the first nearly perfect night in Mezzanine.
Chapter 12
I awoke just as the warmth of the fire dissipated. The darkness blindfolded me for a moment. The fire was almost completely gone, leaving only light shades of amber on its immediate surroundings. I wiped away the frost from my clothes and sniffled. Then I heard something rustling in the snowy woods.
“Chester, wake up,” I whispered. He moved slowly.
“Huh?”
“It sounds like someone is out there.” We both searched the forest with our eyes. He got up, grabbed something from his pocket, and stood silently listening.
Then we heard the sound of fluttering wings.
“Humbert?” I questioned. The little remaining light from the fire flickered a reflection in his large, dark eyes. He perched on a rock near me. My first instinct was to look at his feet for a message, like I had every other time I had seen him.
I took the small paper from him and read it aloud so that Chester could hear.
Rowena,
As you know, Madeline is in our custody. She has been placed into a sleep. The longer she is in the sleep the more difficult it will be for her to come out of it. The only person who can wake her is you. She is located in a glass tomb in my garden. I’ll be waiting.
Until then.
Yours truly,
Dresdem
I looked up at Chester. His eyes widened.
“I’ve got to help her.”
“It’s a trap, Rowena. That’s obvious.”
“It doesn’t matter. I still feel this nagging guilt for leaving her behind. I cannot let her be lost in some magical sleep because of me. She’s my friend,” I said.
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