by Beth Rinyu
My little ploy didn’t seem to work out as planned. He looked at Jack, who had made a mess of himself with the icing. “Jack, go wash your face and hands.”
Jack jumped off the chair and headed to the bathroom, leaving me alone with Simon.
“Sorry, but sometimes I just can’t resist when he bats those little eyelashes at me.”
“Bree, you have to learn to tell him no sometimes.”
I turned around and took another sip of my coffee. “Well, I guess since you’re home, I’ll be going.”
“Can’t you at least stay and have coffee with me?”
“That depends.”
“On?”
“Am I gonna get in trouble if I have a cupcake for breakfast?”
He moved closer, until we were just a few inches apart—so close that I could feel the warmth coming from his body. I backed myself into the counter as the palms of his hands braced the upper cabinets just above my head. He leaned down, moving his delicious lips closer as I waited in anticipation to feel them on mine. My breath hitched and my heart raced. Why did he have this effect on me every time he was near?
“Bree, when are we gonna go play in the snow?” Jack interrupted, coming out of nowhere.
I ducked out from under Simon and pulled it together. Simon recovered nicely, pretending he was reaching for a coffee cup in the cabinet.
“Oh…umm.”
“Please, Bree. You promised!” Jack begged.
“Yes, Bree, you promised,” Simon teased.
“Okay, sure,” I caved, unable to resist either one of them.
“Yay!” Jack jumped up and down.
“I umm…just want to take a quick shower.” I glanced at Simon and wished I hadn’t. The devilish grin on his face had me thinking I needed a cold shower instead.
***
“Today was the first time I ever played in the snow,” I confessed to Simon after a super fun day of building snowmen and having snowball fights in the park. Just like I had gotten coerced into playing in the snow, I couldn’t resist Simon and Jack’s invite to stay for dinner. I knew I should have left as soon as I was done eating, but I didn’t. Then the little voice inside of me told me to go when Jack and Macy passed out and Simon carried Jack up to bed, but there I was, sitting beside Simon with a glass of wine in hand.
“Wow, you didn’t get out much as a kid, did you?” Simon teased.
I took another sip of wine and laughed. “Just never had snow where I grew up.”
His eyes widened in surprise.
“I know—crazy, right? Kind of like growing up and never watching Scooby-Doo, or without a dog.” I grinned.
“Oh. I just remembered something. I’ll be right back.” Simon jumped off the couch and headed up the stairs, coming back down right away with his hands behind his back.
I creased my eyebrows as he approached me, almost afraid to see what he was hiding behind him. “What do you have?” I was cautious with my request, unable to conceal my smile when he revealed the stuffed dog he was holding in his hand with one floppy ear and one ear standing straight up. “Oh my god!” I covered my mouth in shock. “It’s Toby!”
“Yeah, well, not exactly. This dog has matching eyes.”
“How on earth did you remember?” I asked as I examined the adorable ball of fluff while Simon took a seat next to me once again on the couch. “This is seriously the best gift I’ve ever been given.” Without even thinking, I leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. “Thank you so much.”
“You’re really easy to please, aren’t you?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I just happen to know the things I like and have a passion for.”
He nodded and moved closer. “Do I happen to be one of them?” When his fingertips caressed the side of my face, I had to look away. He redirected my attention, tipping my chin and forcing me to look into his eyes. “Am I?” he asked once again.
“Yes,” I whispered, finally admitting it to him as well as myself. Those lips I had been longing to feel for days were finally pressed against mine. My body awakened as we sank down on the couch and his mouth moved to my neck. “Simon.” I found my voice, gripping the sides of his face as he gazed down at me with those beautiful eyes, so full of passion.
“Bree. Please don’t tell me you’re going to say what I think.” There was a hint of frustration in his voice.
I shook my head. “I know this may sound corny, but I want you to—” I bit my lip.
“You want me to what?”
“Remember when I told you I wanted to forget that we had a sexual history together?”
He nodded, and I continued.
“I want to forget that I’ve ever had a sexual past with anyone.”
“Oh, so you want me to be your first?” A triumphant grin spread across his face.
I smiled back. “Yes.”
“I think I can handle that.”
I let out a relieved breath before our lips met once more. There was a tenderness in his kiss that I’d never felt before with him. He took me off guard when he stood up and reached down for my hand.
“I didn’t think you wanted your first time to be on the living room floor,” he explained, sensing my confusion.
I smiled, loving that he was taking my request so seriously. I stood up, took his hand, and followed him up the stairs and into his bedroom. That night, I truly felt as if I made love for the very first time, and I couldn’t imagine taking that step with anyone but Simon. He was caring and gentle while still managing to keep that sexy side to him, making me feel as if I was his one and only as well. We had been down this road before, but in that moment as we got lost in each other, we were exploring uncharted territory. Our bodies moved in perfect sync, creating an unadulterated pleasure that neither of us had ever experienced before as his hands and lips traveled to every inch of my body, awakening parts that had been dormant for so long. We made love until we were both spent, lying in each other’s arms soaked in pure contentment.
Simon was fast asleep with his arms draped around me while I was still wide awake, reveling in the high my body was still in, questioning my feelings like always. I had never felt for anyone the way I did for Simon—not even Nathan. Maybe it was because Simon had seen the damaged side of me and still wanted me just the same. Maybe because what Simon and I had was mature, and what Nathan and I had was young love. Whatever the case, I knew I was wrong to be comparing the two, but they were the only two men I had ever had such intense feelings for. Part of me wondered if I was setting myself up for disaster with Simon. What if I was falling for someone who wasn’t falling equally for me, and what if I’d just risked whatever bizarre relationship we had by sleeping with him? What if Simon still viewed me as a call girl, just one he no longer had to pay to have sex with? My mind couldn’t take all of the questions, making it impossible to settle down and get some sleep.
I lifted his arm from my body and stepped out of bed, throwing on my tee shirt and panties. I walked over to the window and gazed out at the moonlit street. Another round of snowflakes were falling from the sky, forming a fresh new blanket of snow. No footprints, no dirt, just pureness everywhere you looked. I rested my forehead on the cold windowpane and took a deep breath. I had allowed Simon to make those first footprints in my newly fallen snow earlier that night, and I didn’t regret it. No matter what was to become of us, I would never be sorry for allowing him into my heart.
“What are you doing?” Simon lifted his head, with his eyes half open.
“Just looking at the snow.” I turned my attention back out the window. “It’s so beautiful,” I whispered.
Simon got up and stood behind me, wrapping his arms around me. I leaned my head into his chest, relishing in the warmth of his body pressing against mine.
“Not as beautiful as you,” he whispered in my ear. Simon had a way of not only making me believe his words, but actually making me feel them. I was beautiful when I was with him. His warm, gentle hands moved under my tee s
hirt and skimmed my breasts. I closed my eyes, so at ease in the moment as his lips trailed down my neck. I raised my arms and he lifted my shirt over my head, turning me around to face him. With my bare chest pressed into his, I grabbed the sides of his face, standing on my tippy-toes and kissing him.
“You’re my new-fallen snow, Simon.”
He stared down at me in confusion.
My thumbs skimmed the sides of his face, with the glow of the moon providing just enough light to make out his perfect features. “Each new-fallen snow is a second chance to get it right. Thank you for giving me the chance to prove not only to you, but to myself that I’m more than who I once was.”
“You’re so much more.” His voice was low and hoarse. “God, I didn’t think it was possible to want you any more than I already did, but you never cease to amaze me.”
“Want to go back to bed?” I asked.
“That depends.”
“On?”
“Are we going back to bed or going back to sleep?”
“I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me?”
A devilish grin stretched across his face. He picked me up and carried me to the bed, placing me down and hovering over me. He pinned my hands over my head, and his lips came crashing down on mine, the snow inside my heart was falling once again.
Chapter 30
As much as I wanted to spend the day in bed with Simon, I forced myself to be up and out early. I didn’t want to raise any unnecessary questions with Jack if he realized I had spent the night again, especially sleeping in his dad’s bed. It was torture, leaving the warmth of Simon’s arms and heading out into the freezing cold to go home, but I knew it beat the alternative of planting any seeds in Jack’s young, impressionable mind.
After a long, hot shower and a cup of coffee, I was glad I’d braved the cold so early. I was lounging on my nice comfy couch, which I didn’t plan on moving from all day. Hannah wasn’t able to make our afternoon get-together, and I was perfectly fine with that. I just wanted to veg out with my blanket wrapped around me and some chick flicks on my television.
“Damn it!” I whispered to the knock on my door just as I was settling into a movie. I warily got up, wondering who it could possibly be, flinging the door open immediately when I looked through the peephole and saw Jess. “I know…I suck!” I apologized right away for not returning her last two phone calls.
“Thanks, you saved me the time from having to say it myself.” Jess walked in, making herself comfortable on the couch.
“I’ve just been super busy.”
“With what? I thought you’d have a lot of free time on your hands now that you’re unemployed.”
I creased my eyebrows in confusion. I hadn’t talked to Jess in weeks, so she had no idea about anything that had transpired recently in my life—or at least I didn’t think she did.
“I talked to Margo.”
“You what? Why would you do that after she tried sticking it to you?” Suddenly I was on the offensive, and Jess was quickly becoming one of the people in my past who I’d just as soon forget.
She raised an eyebrow. “So, it seems as if my stock tripled once you left your beloved idol. She actually called me up groveling.” A satisfied grin stretched across Jess’s face.
“And I hope you told her where to go.”
She shrugged.
I shook my head in disbelief. “Jess, don’t do it. I don’t care how much she’s offering you, don’t go back there.”
“Oh my god, Bree, would you relax? It’s not like I have much of an option. I don’t exactly have clients beating down my door.”
“Then find another line of work, but don’t go back to working for her. Please, Jess,” I begged.
“Jeez, Bree. What’s the big deal? Just because you decided to part ways with Margo over mutual differences, don’t try to sway me.”
“Mutual differences? Did she tell you what happened, Jess?”
“Yeah, she said you guys had a difference of opinion over a client.”
I shook my head, trying to stem my anger.
“I don’t get it, Bree. Why all this hate for Margo all of a sudden? She was your mentor and you were her protégé.”
“No. She was not. She was nothing but a sick, twisted bitch who brainwashed me for her own benefit.”
Jess’s eyes widened in surprise. It was the first time she had ever heard me speak badly of Margo.
“I was in the hospital with a dislocated shoulder and black and blue marks covering my face, thanks to her.”
“What happened?” Jess’s matter-of-fact tone changed to concern.
“She forced a client on me—a client who she knew had a violent history. He got drunk, beat the shit out of me, and then he tried to rape me.”
She reached for my hand and squeezed it gently. “Oh my god, Bree, I’m so sorry, I had no idea.”
“Now you do. So please, Jess, whatever you do, don’t go back to that horrible woman. I don’t care if you can’t afford your place anymore—then come move in with me.”
“Oh, okay, so both of our unemployed asses could eat bread and water together,” she teased.
“Actually, I’m not unemployed.”
Jess’s jaw dropped. “Really? Are you holding off on me about another agency?”
“No. I’m done with that line of work.”
“So what the hell are you doing, then?”
I hesitated for a brief second. “I’m babysitting.”
Laughter spewed from her and my agitation began to rise, not finding much humor in it at all.
“I’m sorry, Bree, but you don’t have a maternal bone in your body. Who in their right state of mind would allow you to watch their kid?”
“You know what, just forget it!” I snapped, picking up the remote control and turning up the volume on the TV.
“Bree, I’m sorry. Really, I want to hear all about it.” She finally got her laughter under control.
“He’s just a friend of mine who needed help taking care of his son.”
“A friend?”
“Yes.” I shook my head.
“That’s funny, because I don’t remember you ever mentioning a male friend before.”
I shrugged.
“Bree! Who is he?” she demanded.
“His name is Simon.”
“And…where did you meet him?”
“I-I’ve known him for a little while now.”
Jess’s eyes widened. “Oh my god! It’s that British guy, isn’t it?”
My silence gave it away.
“You little bitch. Not only did you steal my client, but you end up getting a job with him. How the hell did you get so lucky?”
“I don’t know. I just did.”
“So, is having sex with him part of your job duties?”
“No, Jess, it’s not. I told you, I’m done with that.”
“Wow! You’re becoming a real goody two-shoes, aren’t you?”
I sighed loudly. “Maybe I actually like being a goody two-shoes. You should try it sometime.”
“Nope, that will never happen. And what’s this?” She touched my hair. “I’m sorry for just noticing it now, but I love the new hairdo.” She cleared her throat. “Did Simon have anything to do with the new look?”
“What? No, Jess. I just wanted a change.”
“Okay, but he’s gotta think you look totally hot.”
“Oh my god, I cut a few inches off my hair—big deal! It had nothing to do with him, and I have no clue how he feels about it,” I lied.
“Jeez, I don’t know if I like this new touchy side to you.”
“Whatever.” I rolled my eyes.
She grabbed her ringing phone from her purse and became flustered. “Bree, I really need to take this. I’ll give you a call this week.” She leaned over, planted a kiss on my cheek, and ran out the door with her ringing phone in hand.
I got up and locked the door, wondering who was on the other end of that phone call. Fairly certain I already kne
w the answer to that question, I became angry at myself for divulging as much as I had to Jess. As much as I cared for her, if she was back in cahoots with Margo, there was no way I could trust her or even be friends with her. It had taken me a while to figure it out, but I was quickly learning who I could and couldn’t trust in life. Sadly, the trust list was getting smaller by the day.
Chapter 31
The last remnants of winter had finally disappeared. Cold, dismal days were traded in for chilly mornings that turned into warm, bright afternoons. The once-barren trees were now dressed in an array of pink and white blossoming flowers before sprouting their familiar shade of green. Spring was upon us, a time for new beginnings.
Simon and I had grown even closer. I was spending more time at his place than my own, and we still managed to keep our little “secret” from Jack. I wasn’t sure for how much longer we’d be able to keep it up, but he was still convinced that on the nights I stayed over, I was sleeping in the guest room. Simon wanted to come clean with him, but I wasn’t sure if Jack was ready for that yet. Our relationship was still fairly new, and the last thing I wanted was for Jack to get his hopes up over a possible future between Simon and me. Even though I hoped that my future included Simon and Jack in it, I didn’t want to assume anything. I knew better than anyone that life could change in an instant. But for the moment, I had to admit, things were going great between us. We were constantly laughing together and were always there for each other when one of us needed someone to talk to. We managed to have fun no matter where we were or whatever we were doing, and the sex just got better and better. It all seemed perfect. Too perfect, and that’s what scared me. I’d never had perfect in my life, so it was all so new to me.
I was super excited when my brother had to make a last-minute business trip to Manhattan, bringing Trey with him and parlaying it into a long weekend for the two of them. I was even more excited to introduce them to Simon. Jack was spending the weekend with his grandparents, so it was just Simon and me meeting my brother and Trey at the trendy Soho restaurant that had just opened up. I wasn’t sure how they’d even managed to get reservations; from what I’d heard it was almost impossible, but knowing Trey, he had connections somewhere.