by Jenn Leigh
I could hear Nat speaking to Cassie as I approached. As soon as I knocked then walked in, Cassie jumped at my entrance, to which I immediately held up my hands and said, “It’s Okay. I am a friend of Nat and Mark. My name is Nilka.”
Cassie huddled herself in the tub filled with bubbles, but she didn’t seem to be overly bothered now that she knew who I was.
“See?” Nat said. “I told you she’s pretty.”
I blushed. “Were you talking about me?”
I looked at Cassie who nodded her head slowly while taking in my features. I knew I was exotic looking, which usually made people do a double-take. My Egyptian background was definitely different in this neck of the woods. There were only a handful of ethnic people in the community, and my family made up the majority of them.
I watched as Nat busied herself in the bathroom while Cassie finished washing up. I noticed how pretty the girl was. She had dark, caramel colored hair with olive skin and the biggest, bluest eyes I had ever seen. She definitely would be a knock out when she got older.
I hadn’t seen her with all the grime, but I could only imagine what it was like by how dirty the water was.
“Has anyone ever played with your hair, Cassie?” I questioned, doubting anyone had.
She looked at me through the mirror. “No.”
“Well, you’re in luck. I love styling hair. I probably should have been a hairdresser, but I’ll keep it for a hobby. Have you ever done your hair in a special way or wanted it done in a special way?” I knew I asked a lot with this request, but I thought, if I did something nice for her, she would come out of her shell a bit more.
She looked at me for a few moments, obviously contemplating what she wanted to say.
“Can you do a fishtail braid?” she asked timidly.
“Of course, sweetie!”
Once she was dressed in one of the new outfits, I began working on her fishtail braid, and when I was finished, she looked quite floored with how it had turned out. Although, that could probably have been from seeing herself clean after what I can only assume was a long time.
“Wow! I can’t believe that’s me,” she said breathlessly.
“You’re a beauty, Cassie. Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently.” I smiled warmly at her. “Now, let’s go surprise Mark.” I giggled.
I ran ahead of her and into the living room, doing a little Vanna White gesture. “Introducing, the new and improved Cassie!”
Cassie took that moment to come into the living room, very shy about her now clean appearance.
“Holy shit!” Mark stated, standing up from the couch. “You look amazing, Cassie. How do you feel?”
“Um … good, I guess,” she replied, hanging her head in embarrassment.
“Well, I think you look fabulous,” I told her.
Nat came into the room carrying a laundry basket and whistled. “Wow, you clean up nice, Cassie, and I love your hair!”
“Thanks.” Cassie looked down, playing with her fingers as her cheeks flushed.
“So, subject change. We have the joint bachelor parties tonight,” I pointed out. “What are we going to do about Cassie since she isn’t old enough to go to the bar with us?”
Mark scratched his head. “Uh, I hadn’t really thought about it, but you’re right. What should we do?”
Cassie stood by the hall, looking very out of place and very unsure about what was happening.
“I can stay back with her,” I offered.
Cassie’s eyes shot to mine, and I smiled at her gently. She looked like I had kicked her puppy, though.
“Don’t worry, Cassie; it would be my pleasure to hang out with you. We can have some girl time, do some girly things. I always wanted a kid sister. This way, I get to try it out.” I winked at her before turning to face Mark. “Besides, girl time is when we get to talk about cute boys and other things.” I waggled my eyebrows at him, hoping he would get the hint of my underlying intention.
I saw the recognition in his eyes once he caught on.
“If you’re sure, Nil. I would hate to put you out or anything,” he said.
“Nah. I would like nothing more than to get to know Cassie.”
Natalie and Mark looked at each other for a moment then both nodded in agreement.
I looked over at Cassie, noticing she had sort of shrunken in on herself and placed her arms over her midsection in a protective action. I slowly walked over to her and waited until she looked at me. “I am really okay hanging out with you.”
She slowly nodded in response before looking over to Mark for reassurance. Mark nodded back, and Cassie relaxed slightly, dropping her arms from her stomach.
“Who’s in need of some food? Because I sure am.” I walked toward the kitchen with Cassie in tow.
Everyone seemed to heave a sigh of relief once the subject was changed.
Chapter 3
Mark
I couldn’t believe what a difference a bath had made in Cassie’s appearance. She was definitely a beautiful girl under all that grime.
Nilka was in the process of making something to eat, which gave me the opportunity to move closer to Cassie.
“Hey, how are you doing with all this attention?” I studied her face, waiting for my answer.
“It’s a bit much, but I feel better now that I’ve cleaned up. I really like my hair,” she answered, looking down at her feet.
I nudged her with my shoulder, getting her to look at me. “You deserve everything that’s coming to you. All my friends will help out, and you’ll be able to connect with your parents in no time. We just have to figure out who they are.”
Cassie didn’t say much after that, only nodded at my statement yet mostly kept to herself around my boisterous group of friends.
Nilka made a bunch of sandwiches and veggies for us to eat. There was still a lot that had to get done before the joint wedding party tonight. I wasn’t sure how I felt about Nilka agreeing to stay with Cassie. On one hand, it freed me up to help with the party, but on the other, I could stay with them and try to get to the bottom of Cassie’s life thus far. However, I had a feeling Cassie would eventually respond better to an unassuming female, and Nilka would be the better option, especially if something bad had happened to Cassie. Nilka might be the life of the party, but out of all the girls, she was also the most sensitive and caring.
I nudged Nilka’s arm. “Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?” I moved my head toward the hallway, away from everyone’s hearing.
“Uh ... Sure,” she responded.
In the hallway, she leaned against the wall, and without too much thought, I pressed my hand near her head. The move looked intimate, but that wasn’t my intention, at least not in that moment. I wanted her to see the clear intention in my eyes when I spoke to her.
“Are you sure you want to get involved with Cassie?” I asked, searching her face.
“Yeah, the kid’s had a tough break, and I am just as curious as you are on finding her parents.” Nilka looked at my hand as she finished speaking.
“You must have sensed that something bad has happened to her. Do you want to help her through that? Because I do. I don’t know why, but you know me and my bleeding heart. I want to be sure she is okay and safe before I send her to her parents, if we can find them.”
She searched my face for some indication that I was bluffing, but we had known each other for a very long time; therefore, she knew who I was and what I stood for. Then she took a deep breath and closed her eyes, a move I wasn’t prepared for. It was almost as if she was inhaling my scent. I watched her face as she opened her eyes, and for a split second, I saw the longing that I felt daily in her chocolate brown eyes, but she immediately covered it up, hiding it from me again.
“I want to help her, too. I think it’ll be good for me to get involved with her. She needs someone in her corner. I’m sure, between the both of us, we can manage,” she stated, looking directly at me with determination.
I raised an eyebr
ow at her then nodded and looked back toward the kitchen before I looked back at Nilka, who was still standing next to me. I couldn’t understand the look that was now on her face. She was lost in her own thoughts.
“Hey”—I brushed my finger across her cheek—“are you okay?”
She looked back at me and sighed, nodding her head.
“Are you sure? We used to talk all the time. I miss that, Nil. I miss you. I miss our relationship. Tell me you miss it, too,” I pleaded with her, cupping my hand along her cheek.
She looked everywhere but at me, her cheeks flushing pink. “I can’t do this right now.” She slipped away from me and headed back into the kitchen.
I took a deep breath and sighed, shaking my head. There was one thing I was certain of: I had seen longing in her eyes. Now I had the resolve to make it come back. I knew we belonged together, and I would get to the bottom of what was keeping us apart then get Nilka back in my life.
***
I was back in the kitchen with the group, making plans about the joint wedding party. When I glanced over at Cassie, she was nibbling on some of the vegetables that were out, but she looked very guilty for doing so. I walked over to her, got a plate out, and held it out to her. I winked at her to put her at ease as she grabbed the plate tentatively and started to slowly put items of food on it.
I hoped that Nilka could get some information out of her. She was one giant puzzle that I needed to help solve. I wonder who her parents are. I thought as I watched her, racking my brain, thinking of everyone I could in town who could possibly have a kid this age. I wondered on the possibility of one of our friends having an affair or a tryst, but that was like searching for a needle in a haystack. I guessed I had to wait for the sheriff’s office to get back to me. I only had twenty-four hours to figure something out before they put her back in the system. Hopefully, it was in our town, though. That way, I could still check on her and continue to help her find her parents.
Nat nudged me. I looked over at her, realizing I had been staring off into space. She raised her eyebrow at me, but I merely shook my head in return.
“Okay, everyone, time to get a move on.” Daniel clapped his hands together, scaring Cassie in the process.
“Sorry, doll,” Daniel said with a slight smile on his face.
Cassie nodded back.
I smiled at her. Well, at least it was progress; it was better than scooting off to a corner.
Everyone headed toward the door, but I thought I would stay behind for a bit with Nilka and Cassie.
Once everyone had left, I started to help Nilka clean up the kitchen.
“Cassie, why don’t you head to the living room and see if you can work the TV and find something for you and Nilka to watch while I’m gone?”
“You’re coming back, though, right?” Cassie’s worried tone had me instantly wanting to hug her, but I knew she wasn’t ready for that yet.
I winked at her. “Of course. This is my house, after all.”
She visibly relaxed, heading into the living room and leaving Nilka and I alone again.
“I’m not sorry about what I said in the hall; however, I didn’t mean to scare you off. I don’t know what happened all those years ago, and I am waiting for the day when you finally open up and tell me.” I paused, looking at her reaction.
She stilled at washing the dishes.
“We’ve lost so much time together, Nil. I know you still have the same feelings for me as I do for you. I want you back in my life the way we were, not this friendship we have going on.” My tone was pleading, begging her to see my way.
She remained stalk still, but her breathing changed. I was getting through to her.
“I still love you, you know,” I stated.
She took in a sharp breath and closed her eyes. Then I watched as a tear slipped out and rolled down her cheek.
I took action, hugging her, holding her tightly. She was trying hard to hold back from me, but I stood my ground and held her until she relaxed in my arms. I kissed her head then let her go, knowing I had won a small step in the right direction.
Now for the next person in my life who needed me.
I walked into the living room to sit with Cassie.
“So how are you feeling with all of this?” I asked, knowing it would take her a bit to answer my question.
She paused for a few minutes, and when she finally answered, I was shocked into silence.
“I don’t deserve any of this.”
“What makes you say that?” I asked when I regained my thoughts.
“I have always thought I wasn’t good enough for anything, and I was told that plenty of times in the homes I ended up in, so why would things change now?” she wondered out loud.
I turned slightly so I was facing her, slowly grabbing her hand and holding it between mine. “I know you’ve had a rough life, Cassie, and I don’t want to diminish that by my comments. It will take years of help and love to undo what those people have done to you so that you can come to a place of acceptance and higher self-esteem and worth. Hear me when I tell you this. Just because your parents gave you up, that doesn’t mean they didn’t love you. They did it for a reason, and once we find them, we’ll find that reason out.
“From everything I know about adoption or with kids going into foster care, the parents don’t have the means to care for a child, but it is rarely the parents’ intention to send their child—a child they created out of love—to a place where their child is going to be abused. That is the unfortunate result of other people’s actions and how they view other people and kids.
“Cassie, I am not sure what will happen tomorrow after these twenty-four hours are over, but you’ve seen how I am and how my friends are. Even if I can’t keep you here, this town has nothing but wonderful people in it, and I know some of the people who have foster homes. They are good people and nothing like what happened to you—whatever it was—will happen in this town; that I can promise you. Plus, you can’t get rid of me that easily. If you get placed in one of those homes here in town, I will be with you every day until we find your parents, okay? I want you to know that, even though you have been abandoned at every turn, it stops here with me.”
Cassie looked at me with unfathomable depths in her bright, blue eyes, but it was the feeling of hope that shone through that made my heart clench in my chest. Then she threw herself into my arms and started sobbing. I was surprised yet quickly recovered then hugged her back, soothing her until she quieted down.
I peered over her shoulder and saw Nilka leaning against the wall, watching our exchange. She also had an unreadable expression on her face, but her eyes said it all—indecision.
Chapter 4
Nilka
As I stood there and watched Mark and Cassie together, I came to the realization that it was time to talk to Mark about what had happened.
However, with everything that was going on, I definitely had to wait until after the wedding. He might hate me for it once I told him, but he deserved to know what had happened and why I had to leave so abruptly.
After Mark and Cassie separated, Mark got up and started walking toward me. I wasn’t sure how much more my heart could take today with all the heartfelt emotions going on.
“You sure you’re okay staying with Cassie?” he asked quietly.
I thought he really wanted me to back out so he could spend the time with her, but I wanted to help her as much as he did. Besides, once he found out the truth, I probably wouldn’t be around Cassie as much, so whatever I could do in the meantime, I would.
“Yep, I’m good. It’ll be good for her to have some one-on-one girl time. I might be able to ferret out some issues she has so we can at least be sure to get her the proper help in dealing with them. I have a feeling some of those issues are pretty heavy stuff.”
“Yeah, I agree. Just don’t push her. It’ll set her back. It took me and Daniel all day to get her this far. She could break at any moment,” he advised.
; “I know. I’ll be gentle.” I maintained a steady gaze with him to be sure he saw my intentions and sincerity.
“I’m going to go and get ready for the party tonight,” Mark stated to both Cassie and I.
Cassie nodded, still looking like she was crying.
I patted him on the back as he walked by then walked over to Cassie, sitting beside her. Then I grabbed a box of tissues and handed them to her.
“What do you want to do tonight? We can watch movies or even go somewhere fun. It’s up to you.”
Cassie thought for a moment, biting her lip in indecision. “Can we do a movie? I haven’t really seen anything since I was little at one of my foster homes, mostly Disney movies, so it would be great to see something else,” she stated shyly, pulling on the sleeves of her shirt.
“Absolutely! Let’s wait until Mark leaves for the party, and then we can start the movie. Why don’t you go over to the cabinet and pick out something for us to watch? Just remember to keep it PG-13 or less, okay?”
“Okay,” she replied.
I was heading into the kitchen to search for some snacks when Mark came out, all ready to go to the party. My stomach clenched at how good he looked and all the years I had wasted by hurting both of us.
I had known he loved me, but it took him saying it this afternoon to make me realize what a fool I had been by denying what we both wanted. I only hoped he could forgive me after I told him what had happened. I had my doubts about that, though. My betrayal would kill him—I just knew it.
“I’m heading out. Text me if you need anything or need me to come home,” Mark said as he put his shoes on.
I nodded, and Cassie smiled at him as she came over to give him a hug.
“Wow! That’s two hugs in an hour. How do I get more of those?” He winked at Cassie, and she giggled. “Have fun, girls, but don’t get into too much trouble.” Mark winked at me before walking out the door.