by J G Jerome
“Go powder your nose, Lorn.” I see them leave my periphery as she leads him away.
Then I see her come back alone. “Hello Jack. Have you been waiting for the Princess like you were told?” I assume we’re playing the brain-dead game.
“Yes, Trina”
“Did Princess Myra tell you to obey me?”
“Yes Trina.”
“Good boy, Jack”
I whisper, “woof” as she pats my cheek. She chuckles.
“Stay here, Jack.”
“Yes Trina.”
She goes away, and then I hear a cart approaching.
“Jack, come back here and help me load the cart.”
“Yes Trina.”
I force myself to move deliberately to the back of the SUV.
I load up the guitar and amp on the bottom of a standard office cart.
I murmur to her, “Are we clear of observers?”
I barely hear the response, “make it quick.” I pull my holster from my bag, clip it on my belt under my coat, and rezip the duffle.
I put my two bags on the top shelf of the cart, and Trina adds hers next to them. I raise an eyebrow at the empty cargo area. She murmurs ‘I had to turn them in.’ Then louder, “That wraps it, Jack. Follow me and be careful not to spill anything. The Princess would be upset with you.”
“Yes Trina.”
We walk towards the back of the garage to a cargo elevator. Trina calls the lift, and we load in when it arrives. I’m surprised to see we’re going down three levels. Trina stays in character, so I do too. I’m assuming there are eyes and ears on us until she tells me otherwise.
We exit the lift into a wide corridor. Trina marches ahead rapidly. I keep my senses on high-alert. After about a 10 minute walk we arrive at a door. Trina opens it and looks out. She waves at someone and urges me past her.
Trina runs ahead to embrace an old, grey-skinned guy standing next to a worn brown Yukon. As I approach, still in character, I hear him say, “You’re too kind to an old man, Lady Laughlin.”
She shakes her head and says, “No Cholley. You’re the only person I can trust. I could never be too kind to you, you gnarly old goblin.” She hugs him again as he grins back at her.
Cholley says, “The keys are in it. Be careful sweet lady.” He watches them with a wistful look. I notice he has worn tusks sticking up from his bottom lip.
“Thanks for taking care of it for me, Cholley. I planned to take the Princess’ ride, but apparently it has to go in for a recall service. So, I’m taking my baby.” She caresses the back of the old goblin and calls to me without even turning towards me. “Jack, please load everything in the back.”
“Yes Trina.” I move deliberately but rapidly to get everything secured and close the hatch.
“Good job, Jack. Get into the Princess’ seat.”
“Yes Trina.”
Trina mounts up, starts the vehicle, and we pull out of the standard 3-car garage. She turns right on what turns out to be Dark Shadow Road, navigates her way back down Soldier Pass Road, and turns right down 89A southbound. As we head out of town she shows me a profile with a finger on her lips, and then pulls a folded piece of paper from somewhere. I take it and read it.
Dearest Jack, I miss you terribly already, and I just got upstairs to my office. The thought of what lies in front of me is daunting, but I know I can do it because I have your love and support. Please be more cautious with your safety and protect Trina. I couldn’t bear for either of you to not to be on this world with me. Between you, you have all my love. - Myra
I give the paper a quick kiss and then tuck it into the inside pocket of my car coat.
About a half-mile past the last of the buildings of Sedona, Trina crosses the highway and runs onto a dirt road. She suddenly stops behind a stand of low trees. As we wait for the dust to clear, Trina looks me in the eye. She raises her hand to point at both of her eyes and points to behind me. I nod and unbuckle. As the last of the dust settles, I pull my pistol and chamber a round. I lower the hammer, and re-holster it. I pop the door open at the same time I hear Trina exit. I look out behind the vehicle, and then exit and move about five meters behind the SUV taking cover behind a tree.
Trina opens the back hatch and removes something from her duffle. She steps back and drops an item on a string, then she spins it over her head as she walks around the vehicle scanning the surface and interior of the vehicle. The thing makes a high-pitched whistle as she spins it. As she makes the circuit, the whistle drops in pitch three times. She stops spinning and places the device on her seat, and then roots around in the interior and under the chassis. When she is satisfied, she picks up the spinner again and repeats the circuit again, then reverses direction for a third circuit. The last circuit she gets a basso hum from the device as she walks past the hatch.
“Fuck!” That doesn’t sound good. She crawls into the back and roots around the cabin light, then jumps out. She pulls a small cloth bag out of her duffle and puts the items she retrieved into it.
Then she pulls another small device out of a cargo pocket. She bends to slam it hard on a rock, and then she shakes it. It starts flashing a bright fiery red. Leaving the device on the rock, she sprints back to her duffle and roots through it for about 20 seconds muttering, “come on, come on, come on” the whole time. Finally she finds the object of her search and sprints back to the flashing object, touching it with the new object. Then she twists the new object hard with both hands and tosses it under the truck. She picks up the red flasher and holds it firmly in both hands. She starts breathing deeply and her eyes begin to glow. Shadows grow out from under the truck to create a dark halo about five feet around the wheelbase. Then she sharply twists the flashing red object. After a moment it turns to blink bright blue. Trina’s eyes get brighter, and the shadow rolls back under the SUV like a wave heading into the beach. Her eyes fade, and then I hear a far-off rumble. The device stays blue, but stops blinking.
She picks up a roughly brick sized rock and lays the objects she found on a rock on the ground. Then she vigorously pulverizes them with her brick. When she’s satisfied, she walks over to my position and hands me the bag. “That was damned close. Please dig a hole and bury the contents of the bag. Use a rock to dig. It needs to be about 6” deep. Save the bag.”
I respond with my brain-dead, “Yes Trina.” She stops cold, and caresses my cheek with the back of her fingers. “You can drop that now, Jack”
“Great. I was afraid it was turning permanent.” She chuckles and walks back to her duffle bag. “Don’t cover up the hole until I’m done. I might have additions.”
“Sure thing.” I get to work. Five minutes later I’m done. “Anything else?”
“Do you know how to disable a GPS?”
“Sure. Easy-Peasey. I can even do it so it can be put back together again.”
“Not necessary, but probably better than wasting a bullet.”
I pull my multi tool out of my pocket, and have the job done in another five minutes with the spare parts in the glovebox. “All done,” I call out and look around for Trina.
She’s kneeling in front of my hole, covering it up. ‘Damn, that girl has a fine ass!’
“Are you staring at my ass,” she asks without turning around. ‘Busted!’
“Certainly. An ass that fine on display creates an imperative to worship!”
“Flowery talk from a mere mortal,” she grins.
“Anything else?”
“Just one thing. If you can, go pee on your hole. It might throw off any sniffers they send to investigate and if not, I’ll get a perverse pleasure thinking of them digging through your piss.”
I shrug and say, “Easy enough.” That mission only takes a minute. I zip up and head back to the truck. She’s leaning against the closed hatch looking my way.
I ask, “Were you staring at my ass?” She just grins at me. I keep going, “I feel so objectified.’
She moves to mount the vehicle. I send to Durec, �
�can you transition into something like Jacob is doing around my neck. I’m over-heating with the full mail.’ He transforms into a metallic cord around my neck with three Celtic knots in the front.
“You want me up front, Trina?”
“Not while I’m working. It throws me off my game.” ‘Really?’
“OK.” I jump back into Myra’s customary seat.
She twists to look back at me asking, “Where to?”
“Back to Cottonwood.” Trina pulls out.
By this point it’s almost 1:00, and I was supposed to meet the Realtor at 10:30. I call him up.
“Hey KC, it’s Jack. Sorry to flake out on you. It’s been one adventure after another today.”
“Hey Jack! Good to hear from you. Sorry you’ve had a crappy day. Where you at?”
“We’re about halfway between Sedona and Cornville road.”
“Both places are vacant, so we can go as soon as you get there. Why don’t we meet at Cornville Road, and you can follow me in?
“Sounds good. I’m in an older, brown Yukon. We’ll pull up on the roadside if we don’t see you there upon arrival.”
“Good plan. See you soon.”
“Hey Trina, did you get all of that?”
“Crystal clear, Sir,” emphasizing the title.
I sit quietly as Trina does what she does perfectly. We end up getting there first; so, we park to wait.
Trina turns around, “I’m sorry for fucking up your day, Jack. I should have dropped you at the realtor when we went through the first time.”
I shake my head. “If you had done that, then I wouldn't have been there to help with ‘Prince Douchebag in a Manbun’ and the Douchettes. We would have lost our lover, and I might have lost you, too. That would have been a very bad bargain. We’ll get through the impacts. By the way...what was that shit on the roadside on the way here.”
“Magical eavesdropping devices, technical eavesdropping devices, and high explosives. Somebody got to Cholley. If they hurt his family, I may have a vendetta to take up. If he just sold me out, then I’ll have to figure out how best to resolve it. He really has been a good friend to me.”
“I’m sorry for the loss of your friend. Good ones are hard to find and worth fighting for. What was the shadow thing and the boom?”
“I used the shadows to move the explosives before they exploded. Unfortunately, my dump site is in a cavern below the mountains around Sedona. The idea was that explosions wouldn’t be audible. Apparently there are pathways for the sound to travel out, or the mountain fell from this last one. We were rather closer than I ever expected to be. I figured I’d be sending stuff from back east or the west coast and maybe pipe-bomb in size. That was big. Sedona is supposed to be a safe zone. The asshats I could have written off because it was outside Sedona proper. Placing explosives in my private vehicle in our compound. Crap, I didn’t even request Cholley have it ready until we were in Myra’s office.”
She sits and ponders that for a while
“You OK, Trina?” She turns to look at me.
“Yeah, Jack. You?”
“Hungry, could use some coffee, and missing Myra. Otherwise perfect.”
“I’m revising mine to copy yours. Good answer.” I feel the corners of my mouth tug up a bit.
KC pulls up next to us and honks. I wave, and he pulls out. “I wonder if he’ll have his jaw off the floor by the time we get where we’re going? You made quite an impact!”
“Pthdt!” Then she grins. ‘It’s much easier to see her face from this side.’
“Nice raspberry! Very lady-like.”
Chapter 12 - Home Hunting
We continue down Cornville Road and turn left onto Page Springs road, passing ‘urban’ Cornville on our way to look at the acreage. We pull into a driveway to the right. I get out to join KC who is leaning on the hood of his truck. Trina turns the SUV around, as we shake hands and exchange greetings. He’s a big guy. His 6’5” causes me to look up at him when he stands. Fortunately for me he prefers slouching, leaning, and sitting; consequently, the risk of getting a crick in the neck is low. I don’t know how heavy he is, but when we discussed his health on the phone a couple weeks ago, he mentioned that he’s moving up from 325. His largesse isn’t limited to his belly; he’s just big. It doesn’t matter though because carrying all that weight will wear you down, and it’s hard on a heart muscle. He always seems worn out. I gave him some resources to help, but I don’t think he ever did anything with them.
As Trina walks up, KC’s eyes follow her every move. I think I’ve lost him. “Hey KC, let me introduce this vision before you go blind. This is Trina. Trina, this is KC.”
He stands tall and extends a hand to shake, “Kory Calhoun, ma’am. My pleasure to meet you. Please call me KC. All my friends do.”
Trina puts on the charm as she slides her slender hand into his paw, “Katrina Laughlin. I am honored you consider me a friend, KC. Please call me Trina.”
KC looks at his now-empty hand. Trina glides up next to me. She slides her right hand up my back and leans her head on my left shoulder, rubbing her cheek up and down on my shoulder. Looking at KC, she says “I belong to Jack,” with a little purr in her voice. Then she looks up at me and gives me a wink and a smirk.
I drop my hand down and spank her firm little ass. ‘You’ve just been looking for an excuse, haven’t you,’ as I smirk back at her. She just purrs at me; so, I roll my eyes.
“Behave,” I tell her.
She stands on her own and demurely responds, “Yes Sir.”
I hear KC murmur, “Lucky sonofabitch.”
I laugh, “You got that right, buddy.” He joins me in laughter, and starts pointing out the features of the property.
I like being on the front side of the slope and close to the waters of Oak Creek. It has an old white barn, which appeals, but I bet Trina would push it over if she leaned on it. Plus it’s only 5 acres, half of which is mountainside. I walk the property cataloging pros and cons, but it only takes me about ten minutes to return to the truck where KC and Trina are leaning on the hood whispering amiably to each other. KC looks up as I approach.
“Nope. What’s next?”
“The other one is about another mile up the road. It butts up to the winery. They are interested; I don’t think it will be available long.”
“Trying to engage my competitive nature, KC?”
He laughs, “That would be hopeless. I don’t think you have a competitive bone in your body. You don’t even like to watch sports!”
I laugh with him. “I don’t watch sports because I have a life,” revisiting an old familiar conversation. “I’m plenty competitive enough when it counts,” I laugh.
Trina turns serious and nods her head in response. “I’ll say.” Then she looks KC in the eye and shines her 100 kilowatt smile on him.
“Lead the way, KC.”
I head back to the SUV, and Trina runs ahead to start the car. ‘Damn that’s a fine strong ass! No wonder Myra doesn’t want to let her go!’ I grin to myself as I slide into my seat.
Once I’m ready, Trina pulls out to follow KC, apparently completely focused on the road. Then she says, “Did you enjoy the show, sir?”
Acting dumb, “What show, Trina?”
“Oh, sir. You missed the show of my ass as I ran past you?” I see a little pout of the lip as she keeps her eyes on the road.
“Oh that! Sorry Trina. I saw your ass run by in those snug pants, and it caused my brain to reboot! I completely lost what you were talking about. My apologies.”
“Oh! So, you did notice me, sir?”
“Most definitely. The show was glorious to behold.”
I see KC’s turn signal ahead. “I’m really not convinced this is how I should be spending my day today. I want to find a property, but it seems so trivial after all the day has revealed so far. And it’s still early.”
“Jack, the courts were here long before you knew about it, doing the same fucked up shit they’re doing now.
You’re not going to change that today. You shouldn’t even be aware of it. Myra and I should just be your kinky girlfriend and her female lover who work for some anonymous benefits organization. I think that’s how she said it.” I nod, not knowing if she can see me or not. “The thing that you and I can do right now to make the world a better place, and make Myra happy, is to live your life as close to what you had planned as possible.”
“When did you get so wise?”
“Always have been. I’m the ancient sage of the Winter Court, didn’t you know?” She grins over her shoulder as she puts us into park.
I laugh, “At this point, it wouldn’t surprise me.”
I open the door and get out. Trina managed to combat park us right next to KC’s truck so the two vehicles are nose to ass. I lean across KC’s hood, matching his posture across it on the other side. Trina cuddles up to my left side as I look out over the property.
“KC, this one is worse. The equipment shed is in good condition, but it’s right in the floodplain for the creek. The banks of the creek are low to the waterline; so, it’s gonna flood. The one positive I see is the hillsides remind me of the vineyards I used to run through in Germany’s Frankenland. They’re facing pretty well for grapes. Sell it to the vineyard.”
“You’re not even going to walk it?” I shake my head with a frown.
“Thanks anyway, KC. I’ve got a property over around Prescott, down Senator Highway, this afternoon. I’ll check it out. I’ve given you detailed requirements. You know what I’m looking for.”
“You may have to buy someone out to get it.”
“You know my budget. There might be enough to do it if we find the right place. If not, we’ll figure it out when the time comes.”
He nods. “Okay. Safe travels, buddy.” He waves.
Trina runs around the hood of the truck and gives KC an warm hug. She looks up at him and the huge arm he wrapped around her. “Take care of yourself, KC. I don’t have many friends. So, I need you to stick around. Okay?” She jumps up and plants a kiss on his cheek.
As she breaks away and quickly marches away he says, “You better leave, sweetheart or I’m gonna fall in love.”