by Kim Alexis
“Juliette, I—”
“I’m serious! Sorry, but as thrilled as I am to see you, I won’t let you off that easily. You said you would come and find me and you didn’t.”
He cleared his throat, a pained expression on his face. “Actually, I did.”
“Oh? When?” Her eyes narrowed.
“Exactly two years after the day we met. I knew you were making an appearance at a big charity benefit, and I was going to surprise you by showing up there.”
Juliette took a step back, her mind racing. Two years after they met, she’d been living in Philadelphia with her sister, significantly healed from the trauma of her modeling years and trying to decide what she wanted the next phase of her life to look like. She’d been doing a lot of volunteer work back then and also lending her celebrity to various causes, which was how she’d met Mike.
Her fiancé, Mike.
Juliette’s eyes widened as she looked at Marcus, afraid to hear what he was going to say next.
He nodded somberly. “That very afternoon I was all checked in to my hotel and had about an hour before it was time to get ready for the event. I was just reading the sports section of the Philly paper when I saw your picture with Mike Parshall and read the little headline, ‘Eagles Wide Receiver to Marry Supermodel.’”
Juliette’s hand came up to cover her mouth. “Oh, Marcus.”
“Yeah, not the best moment of my life. Needless to say, I packed up and headed out.”
“Without even contacting me?”
He shrugged. “You were newly engaged, I had no right to come in and mess that up.”
“But to not even let me know?”
He studied her face for a long moment. “In retrospect, I guess I could have dropped you a note or something after the fact. But I was hurt. Idiot that I am, I thought you would’ve waited for me.”
Much to her surprise and embarrassment, Juliette’s eyes suddenly filled with tears.
In response Marcus stepped closer and took her hands in his. “Hey, hey. Look, it was all my fault, not yours. It took me too long. I should’ve come sooner. I should’ve stayed in touch with you instead of waiting until I was established and ready. That was really dumb on my part. I mean, come on. What was I thinking?”
Blinking away her tears, Juliette looked down at their clasped hands, unable to meet his eyes as he continued.
“At least I learned some valuable lessons from all of that.” He gave her hands a firm squeeze and released them.
Juliette dropped her arms to her sides. “Oh? What, snooze you lose? Strike while the iron’s hot? Don’t count your chickens before they hatch?”
His face flushed. “All of the above. But the whole experience also taught me to live a more balanced life. To not surrender one area for another. Like, don’t sacrifice love for the sake of work. That kind of thing.”
“That kind of thing,” she echoed.
“I mean, from the day you and I met, I spent the next two years living with complete tunnel vision, totally focused on breaking away from the firm and establishing myself in the field in a new way.”
“That’s exactly what you were supposed to be doing.”
He nodded. “Yeah, but not at the expense of everything else. Once I got home from my failed trip to Philly, I took a long, hard look at my life. Started dating again. Tried to forget about us and move on.”
So Marcus had moved on—even as she and Mike eventually called off their engagement and she spent more than the next two decades not moving on, romantically speaking, at least not in any significant way. Unbelievable. Fearing her knees might buckle, she looked back for the bench they had passed, spotting it not far from the big rock, tucked amidst flowering shrubs.
“I need to sit down,” she murmured as she began walking toward it, her head pounding with one thought, If only I had known.
If only I had known.
AS SOON AS CRYSTAL was done for the day, she changed out of her work uniform into shorts and a T-shirt and beelined to her car. She pulled out the county map and studied it until she located Canyon Drive, where Moonflower lived. It looked like quite a trip—maybe fifteen or twenty miles—but she needed to talk to the woman in person regardless.
Half an hour later, she was there. As she turned in, she saw that the driveway was in worse shape than the road. She had to dodge potholes right and left as she inched her way toward the house.
If it could be called a house.
The structure was a geodesic dome, constructed of wood with a natural finish and blending in with the background foliage. Wildflowers grew along the walkway and beside the steps that led to a small deck at the front door. Beyond the dome, more wildflowers peppered a small meadow between house and woods. A stone birdbath and some feeders dotted the yard, and numerous wind chimes tinkled from where they hung among the trees. As Crystal began to climb the steps, the door swung open.
“You made it.” Moonflower was wearing a shapeless, flowing muumuu, tie-dyed in varying shades of blue and green. “Any trouble finding the place?”
“Nah,” Crystal said, not wanting to complain. When she reached the doorway, Moonflower welcomed her with a tight hug, smelling of jasmine and rose petals.
The older woman brought her inside and offered her tea, and soon Crystal was sitting at a small, rough-hewn table in the kitchen, watching her friend set water to boil on the stove as she launched right into the topic of Raven.
Grief darkened Moonflower’s lovely face as she told how they’d met twenty years ago, when the supermodel first came to the spa. “Almost right away, I could see how empty her soul was. I poured all the compassion I had into that girl.”
“I’m sure she appreciated it.”
“Maybe. She didn’t show her gratitude like most people.”
“No?”
She sighed, placing loose tea in a ball and hanging it in a brown pottery teapot. “Raven was angry on the outside, but on the inside she was just a scared and helpless child. She had a hard life before she made it big. The wounds went very, very deep.”
Crystal wanted to know more but it wasn’t her right to ask.
Once the water was hot enough, Moonflower took it from the stove and poured it into the teapot. After replacing the lid, she took a step back from the counter. “Now we give it time to steep. A lot of people don’t do that, but we all need it—time to steep. That’s what I’ve been trying to do today.”
“To steep?”
Moonflower nodded soberly. “While I was steeping, I realized something. I know you want me to talk to the cops, but you need to understand, it’s not always up to us to change things. Sometimes we need to sit back and contemplate what life has done to us, not rush out with the blind idea that we have to do something to life.”
Crystal struggled mightily to keep her voice calm. “And Raven’s killer? If you don’t tell the police what you know, don’t you think he’ll seek and find his next victim in due time?”
Moonflower’s head jerked, as if the peaceful aura she’d spent the afternoon building had shattered in one quick blow. When she spoke, her lips were tight. “Other forces are in play here, and changes will happen whether we interfere or not.”
Crystal’s lips went tight as well. “But somebody already interfered, big time—with Raven’s life, with Brooke’s, with yours. With a lot of people’s, including everyone at Palm Grotto.”
Moonflower seemed sadder and more distressed than Crystal had ever seen her, and yet on some level she retained that calmness, every movement one of purpose.
“Come on, let’s sit. Bring the mugs, will you?” Moonflower grabbed the pot with both hands and carried it into the living area, where she set it on a low table and then took her seat in a nearby rocking chair.
Crystal chose a recliner and sat, looking around at the simple furnishings of Moonflower’s home. A loft extended partway across the room, and hanging from its rafters were bunches of herbs. Underneath was a work area filled with large jars and pottery crocks,
a stone mortar and pestle sitting idle on the table.
“Is that where you create your rubs and oils?” Crystal asked.
“Yes, that’s my workshop. Currently I’m perfecting a new lemon foot scrub made with Sea Salt.”
“Nice.”
Finally Moonflower poured their tea. Crystal accepted hers and took a sip, the fragrant blend unusual but soothing.
Glancing over at Moonflower, Crystal decided to drop the whole police matter for now and come at things from a different angle. Wrapping both hands around her warm mug, she lowered it to her lap and fixed her gaze on her friend. “On the phone earlier you said that Raven was being blackmailed.”
Moonflower nodded ever so slightly, avoiding her eyes.
“Why don’t you tell me a little more about that?”
The woman shrugged, her face growing a deep red.
“It’s okay, really.” Crystal spoke in the soft, cajoling tones one might use with a skittish horse or a nervous child. “Think of it this way, Moonflower. Your friendship with Raven got you into this mess, whatever it is. Maybe your friendship with me can help get you out.”
THERE WAS SO MUCH that needed to be said, and yet neither one spoke at all. Instead Juliette and Marcus simply sat side by side on the bench by the big rock, sharing a contemplative silence. This she remembered about him, that he didn’t rush to fill the quiet spaces.
And she wanted quiet at the moment, to think things through and regain at least some control over her emotions. She hated that he had seen her teary eyes and wobbly knees. Breathing deeply she prayed for peace and composure.
Finally, aware of the passing time, Juliette pulled out her phone to see how much longer until her one free hour of the afternoon was done. Nine minutes.
Not nearly enough for all she needed to say, for all she wanted to know.
Juliette opened her scheduling app to take a look at the rest of the day, and Marcus must’ve realized what she was doing, because he quickly apologized for holding her up if she needed to be somewhere. She explained that she hated to cut things short, but that she had to lead a small group starting at 4:00 p.m. After that, she would be busy with retreat matters straight through until 9:00 p.m.
“I knew you’d probably be kept pretty busy, but please tell me we can get back together afterward. We’ve got a lot of catching up to do.”
He sounded so earnest, so eager, that once again she found herself utterly disarmed. Guys usually went one of two ways with her, either they fawned all over her, smothering her with attention and adoration, or they worked hard to play it cool around her, like they thought she’d be impressed with their indifference.
Not so this guy, which was one of the things she had liked most about him way back when. Even now, all these years later, his genuineness remained. Marcus Stone was a good guy, definitely not the kind who put on a fake persona in an attempt to manipulate.
Leaning slightly closer to him now, Juliette showed Marcus the screen of her phone, pointing out that guests were welcome to the last three parts of the evening, which were dinner at the restaurant, a sunset hike, and an hour of fun and games.
“Great.” His grin warmed her to her toes. “Sounds like I’ll be having dinner at the restaurant, taking a sunset hike, and enjoying an hour of fun and games.”
She returned his smile, feeling far less shaky now. “Of course, I’ll have to circulate during all three, but once game time is over, maybe we can be alone again to talk some more.”
He nodded, locking his blue-gray eyes on hers. “I’d really like that, to talk some more.”
She held his gaze for a long moment but finally forced herself to look away. “Right now, though, I really need to run.”
“I understand. How ’bout I clean up the candy trail while you get to where you need to be.”
“Thanks. I appreciate that.”
They both stood and began walking up the path toward the tree line. As they got closer, Juliette hesitated, unable to save her most burning question for later.
“You know I broke off that engagement, right? To Mike?”
Marcus paused there on the path as well, his expression unreadable. “I know.”
Her eyes widened. “So why . . .” She couldn’t even bring herself to finish the sentence.
He seemed to understand regardless. “That didn’t happen until, what, like nine or ten months later? And then I didn’t hear about it for a few months after that. By the time I found out, it was too late.” He cleared his throat. “By the time I found out, I was married.”
Married?
Juliette froze, crestfallen.
Married.
Seeing her expression, Marcus quickly added, “Oh, sorry, not anymore. I’m not married now.”
She waited, needing more than that.
“It’s a long story,” he added. “Bottom line, she left ten years ago. These days, she’s remarried and living in France.”
She wanted to ask about kids but knew they didn’t have time right now. So instead she just nodded and thanked him for telling her. Then she was off, walking across the grounds of the resort, feeling sad and happy and confused and ecstatic and heartbroken and hopeful—all at the same time.
Chapter Twenty-Two
CRYSTAL SAT BACK, INTENT on Moonflower’s explanation of what the blackmailer had on Raven. The aging therapist took the long way around to get to the point, but the story she told was fascinating.
And heartbreaking.
According to Moonflower, Raven’s real name was Rayleen, and she’d been born in some backwater town in the Appalachian mountains. She’d been a gangly child, but by her early teens had begun to blossom, eventually growing tall and stunning. Rayleen’s mother was a horrible woman, a part-time barmaid and full-time drunk with six kids, all from different fathers. Rayleen was the oldest, and she didn’t even know who her father was.
She did, however, know who her mother’s boyfriends were. That’s because most of them made a point of visiting her late at night, once her mother had passed out drunk. By the time Rayleen was sixteen, she’d learned to defend herself, and she was doing whatever she could to get out of there for good. Her dream was to be an actress, and she waitressed at a truck stop out on the highway, trying to make enough money to go to California and pursue a film career.
Then one day a customer strode into the truck stop, a man wearing nice clothes and with an expensive haircut. As he chatted with the tall, beautiful waitress, he explained that he was a filmmaker from New York, in the area to scout out filming locations.
Rayleen had learned long ago to trust no man, but this guy seemed different. He never made a pass at her, for one thing. Instead, he encouraged her dream of becoming an actress but said he thought she should start on the stage, in New York, rather than out west in L.A.
“If you live in New York, I can use you for some film work, too, if you’re interested,” he’d said. “But I think Broadway’s where you really belong.” Before he left, he gave her his card and said if she ever made it up to the Big Apple to give him a call.
Three months later she did just that. In that very first conversation, he offered her an “extended audition.” She’d been thrilled, thinking this would be her big break.
“You’re okay with nudity, right?” he’d asked just before hanging up the phone, his voice insinuating that if she wasn’t, then she couldn’t possibly be a serious actress.
She had mumbled out some sort of reply, saying she might if it were “justified.” But she hoped the issue wouldn’t come up at all.
“Back then Raven was savvy in some ways but not in others.” Moonflower sounded like she wanted to weep. “In the end, that extended audition was recorded on film—and it involved nudity and more. The man seemed legitimate, so she’d let her guard down—acting out a scene with him exactly as directed. Afterwards, when she realized how he’d tricked her, it was too late.
“Oh, no.” Crystal’s mug of tea grew cold in her hands. “What’d she do?”
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Moonflower pressed her lips into a tight line. “Well, she started by begging the guy to destroy the film, but he refused. It absolutely killed her that she had trusted him. She’d even signed a release. There was nothing she could do.”
“What happened?”
Moonflower shrugged. “I’ll tell you one thing that happened, the day she walked away from that, she built a shell around her heart—a hard, thick shell that no one could ever crack. Dyed her hair vivid red, changed her name to Raven, and never looked back.”
“Poor thing.”
Moonflower glanced down at her mug, then set it on the small table beside her as she continued. “At least she landed on her feet. Stuck it out. Kept trying to pursue her dream. Sadly, all she wanted to be was an actress, but she had far more success as a model. She tried to do both for a while, but once her modeling career took off, the acting kind of fell by the wayside.”
Crystal leaned forward, elbows on her knees. “What about the film?”
“It never surfaced, at least not that she knew of. We discussed it in some of our earliest sessions, and eventually she seemed to work things through. At least she found a peace about it—or she had until a few months ago, when a letter came out of the blue. A blackmail letter.”
Crystal’s eyes widened. “After all these years?”
Moonflower nodded. “The person who wrote it said he had an explicit film of her as a young woman, and unless she forked over twenty thousand dollars, he was going to post it on the Internet. Her first thought, of course, was that the photographer himself was doing this for some reason, but she looked into it and learned that the man died years ago.”
“Wow.”
Moonflower nodded. “Her manager advised her to call the guy’s bluff, said it wouldn’t hurt her career, that in this day and age an explicit film could actually give her a career boost.”
“Wait—career? I thought she retired from modeling a long time ago.”
“She did. For the past ten years or so, she’s been living in L.A., trying again as an actress.”
“So is that what she decided to do? Turn the blackmailer down?”