by Diana Palmer
His face went rigid. “I don’t have to beat up a woman to feel like a man.”
“It’s nice to know for sure, though.”
He could understand how she might feel that way. He didn’t like thinking about it. He sipped his coffee and put the cup on the desk, watching her with a faint smile. “I don’t suppose you might like to kiss and make up?” he asked unexpectedly.
Her shocked eyes met his.
“Oh, nothing heavy,” he clarified. His eyes were watchful, but teasing and oddly tender. “It would do you good, to be kissed in a way that wouldn’t hurt you or scar you.”
“I don’t ever want to be that close to a man again,” she said miserably.
“Sure you feel that way, now,” he returned, his voice still soft. “But it isn’t natural to let it continue. It would be a pity to waste those maternal instincts you used to have. Do you remember when Mary Gibbs brought her baby into your father’s store, Coreen?” he added wistfully, as if the memory was one he cherished. “You’d stand there and hold that little boy, and your face would glow.”
“But, you never saw me…” she began.
His eyes lifted to hers. “I never stopped seeing you,” he replied bluntly. “I watched you all the time, even when you didn’t know I was around. My God, honey, you still don’t understand, do you?”
She shook her head.
“I’m forty years old,” he said softly. “You’re barely twenty-four.”
She just looked at him. It still didn’t register, and her eyes told him so.
He let out a rough sigh. “I’m sixteen years older than you are,” he said heavily. “You don’t realize, you can’t realize, what a burden that age difference would become.”
Her eyes slid over his lean, tanned face. “I’m nothing to you,” she said simply. “So what difference does it make? I don’t hate you, but I don’t love you, either. You made sure of that. You’re safe, Ted,” she added without expression. “I’ll never be a threat to you, or any other man, ever again.”
She turned and started out of the room. She hadn’t even heard him move when she saw his arm slide past her and push the office door shut with a hard snap.
Too nervous to turn, she hesitated. He had her by both shoulders all at once, and the next minute, she was standing with her back to the door and a furious Ted towering over her.
“Which doesn’t mean that I’m not a threat to you,” he replied with glittery pale blue eyes. “I’m so damned tired of being noble…!”
He bent and moved his mouth square over hers with an economy of motion that left her no time to anticipate it.
She gasped under the warm, hard crush of his lips and her hands went automatically to his shirtfront to push.
He lifted his mouth just enough to allow speech, but when he spoke, his lips were still touching hers. “I’m not going to hurt you,” he said tenderly. “Not in any way at all. I’m not even going to hold you. Try not to fight me, sweetheart. Just this once, let me kiss you.”
It would be fatal. She knew it. But the sweet pressure of his mouth on hers was nectar. It had been years, and she’d loved him so much. Their time had already passed, but this tiny space of seconds was like a reminder of what could have been.
She didn’t fight. Her lips brushed against his in a slow, gentle glide that became, eventually, insistent and deep. But he didn’t hold her or imprison her. Only their lips touched, for seconds that seemed endless.
When he finally lifted his head, she was breathless.
His pale eyes searched hers solemnly. “That’s how it could have been,” he said huskily. “And even that is just the beginning.”
She managed to shake off her languor and shook her head. “Don’t torment me, Ted,” she whispered bitterly.
He scowled. “Torment you?”
“I can’t go through it again,” she whispered, wincing. “He tormented me with you. He told me what you said when you came to visit us,” she added, looking up with anguished eyes. “That you’d only played with me before I married him, that you’d never wanted me anyway, because I was so thin and boyish, that I wasn’t woman enough…”
His eyes closed. “Coreen…”
She pulled away from him and opened the door.
“It wasn’t true,” he said roughly.
She looked at him over her shoulder. “But, it was,” she said sadly. “You told me so yourself, that night at the dance.”
“I lied,” he said bitingly.
She smiled sadly. “It’s all right, Ted. It was all a long time ago. But don’t…don’t try to make me care for you again. We both know that you have…new interests, now.”
She was gone before he made the connection. Lillian. She thought he was involved with Lillian. He could have cursed himself for bringing the woman here in the first place. He’d fouled up everything. Coreen wouldn’t let him near her. She’d believed Barry. She thought Ted was only playing. For a minute, he felt total despair. There had to be a way, some way, to show her that things were different now. He just didn’t know how.
As it turned out, Topper was the bait that lured Coreen out of the house. She enjoyed watching the trainer work the young filly on the track out behind the house. While she watched Topper, Ted watched her.
She was blooming here, with no one to hurt her or torment her. Day by day, her complexion turned rosy and she began to smile. Her blue eyes lit like fireflies and she began to gain a little weight as well.
She was standing on the lower rail of the track, watching Topper run, when she felt Ted behind her. She didn’t have to turn and look. She knew when he was close by. It was like intuition.
“The sun’s hot,” he said, lifting her down by the waist. “Don’t stay out here too long.”
“Oh, Ted, don’t fuss, I’m having…oh!”
When she turned, the bandage around his arm shocked her speechless. It was bloody, but he looked amused at her horror.
“Bull gored me, that’s all,” he mused. “Nothing to worry about.”
Her hands trembled as she touched the bandage. “It hasn’t even stopped bleeding! Come on.” He didn’t budge. She caught him by his good arm, her face contorted with worry. “Ted, come on! Please!”
He let her drag him into the house through the back door that led into the kitchen. She held his arm over the sink and unwrapped the makeshift bandage. There was too much blood even to see the damage, and thank goodness she wasn’t squeamish.
She bathed the wound very gently, and then held pressure over it, wincing at the pain she must be causing him. But after two minutes, the bleeding hadn’t stopped.
She looked up into his eyes worriedly. “It’s cut a vein,” she said. “It won’t stop bleeding. You have to go to the doctor!”
He smiled gently at her. “Coreen, I’ve been gored before,” he began. “I know what to do.”
Her jaw set. “I’m taking you to the doctor, Ted, you might as well stop arguing because I’ll call an ambulance if you don’t.”
He opened his mouth to argue, but the paleness of her complexion and the wild look in her eyes stopped him. It touched him deeply that she was that concerned. And he liked the new show of spirit. She’d been subdued for so long now that he’d despaired of her strength ever returning.
“All right, Corrie,” he said, using the familiar nickname for the first time since she’d been here.
She didn’t notice. She was terrified that he was going to bleed to death. If only Sandy or Mrs. Bird was here! She had no one to help her.
Ted dug out his truck keys and handed them to her. “Can you handle it? It’s a long bed.”
“Yes, I can drive,” she muttered, herding him toward the big red-and-white truck. “And I won’t back it into a barn or a ditch.”
He chuckled. “Okay.”
For a man who was bleeding to death, he certainly was cheerful! She got him into the truck and climbed in under the wheel, demanding the name and address of his doctor.
She didn’t falter
all the way to town. Her eyes kept shifting worriedly to the soaked towel around his forearm, but he was amazingly unconcerned. Just as well, she thought; she was frightened enough for both of them.
At the doctor’s office, she led him inside and gave his name to the receptionist, who knew Ted and smothered a grin at the sight of him being led around by this small, determined woman.
But when she noticed the way he was bleeding, she called the nurse and got them right into an examination room. Dr. Lou Blakely came in, wearing a white coat and a grin on her pretty face.
“You’re Dr. Lou Blakely?” Coreen asked.
The willowy blond woman chuckled as she began to examine Ted’s wound. “Lou is short for Louise,” she explained. “What happened to you, Ted?”
“A bad-tempered bull. She wouldn’t rest until she dragged me here,” he muttered good-naturedly, nodding toward Coreen.
“She did the right thing,” Lou said, frowning. “You’ll need stitches. How about your tetanus booster?”
“Current,” he said. “Barely.”
“You’ll need another. Betty!” she called to her nurse. “Bring some sutures and iodine and a tetanus hypodermic, will you, while I check on Mr. Bailey in room three?”
“Right away” came the reply.
“I’ll be back in a minute,” Lou promised, stepping down the hall.
“You can wait outside if you’d rather not watch,” Ted told Coreen, who was sitting stiffly in a chair by the examination table.
She looked up, her face almost tragic. Tears rolled down her cheeks. “If you want me to…”
He let out a sharp breath. “Corrie!” He held out his good hand and she took it. Her lower lip trembled. “Oh, honey!” he whispered huskily, his eyes glittery with feeling. “Honey, don’t cry! I’m all right!”
“It’s bleeding so,” she whispered brokenly.
He pulled her head to his chest and pressed it there, overcome by tenderness. Tears in her eyes affected him violently. His hand contracted in her hair. “I’m all right!” he said huskily.
Lou and the nurse entered together and Coreen had to let go of Ted while they worked.
Lou smiled at Coreen. “He’s tougher than he looks. Honest.”
Coreen nodded, not trusting her voice.
They finished, finally, and Coreen went out with the nurse, Betty, while Lou gave the tetanus booster to Ted.
“How long have you been married?” Betty asked, oblivious to the fact that Coreen was wearing Barry’s wedding band, not Ted’s.
“Oh, I, uh…”
“Not long enough,” Ted replied, sliding an arm around her shoulders. “Come on, baby, I’ll take you home. Thanks, Betty.”
“Sure thing, Mr. Regan.”
“You let her think we were married,” Coreen protested when they reached the truck.
“Betty’s new here. And explanations take too long.” He paused at the passenger door and looked down at her with quiet, soft eyes. “You’re still wearing his wedding band. Why?”
She twisted it on her finger. “I thought if I took it off, you’d think it was one more black mark against me,” she said with resignation.
He caught her hand and wrenched the ring off, glaring at it. He dropped it in the sand and ground it under his heel, staring into Coreen’s shocked eyes. “But…”
He bent and put his mouth over hers in a brief, hard kiss. “Drive me home.”
He got into the truck and closed the door. She hesitated, looking down at where the ring had been. But she didn’t try to pick it up. Whatever had been, her marriage was a thing of the past. She had to put it out of sight, like the wedding ring that signified it. Was that what Ted had meant with the gesture?
She drove the truck back to the ranch, silent and thoughtful.
When Sandy returned from work, she was astonished at Ted’s refusal to see a doctor without prodding.
“You idiot,” she fumed at him over supper. “I try to save you from lung cancer by hiding your cigarettes and here you go trying to get tetanus! Thank goodness Corrie was here!”
He was watching Coreen. “Yes,” he agreed. “Thank goodness she was.”
Sandy put down her fork and sipped her hot tea. “Ted, have you checked on the apartment for me?” she asked.
He lowered his eyes to his plate and toyed with a bit of steak. “I haven’t had time, Sandy. I’ll get around to it in a day or so.”
Sandy glanced toward Coreen and rolled her eyes.
“You know very well that Corrie doesn’t need to be on her own all day while you work,” Ted said surprisingly. “At least she’s properly looked after here.”
“I’m much better,” Coreen protested. “I don’t hurt nearly as much when I move around, and I’m not dizzy.”
“You’re still in a state of shock, though,” he replied. “You’ve been through a lot. Too much,” he added shortly.
“He’s right,” Sandy agreed. “You aren’t really unhappy here, are you, Corrie?”
There was a hesitation. Coreen glanced shyly at Ted. “I like watching the trainer with Topper,” she confessed. “If I move to Victoria, I’d miss that.”
They both smiled. “You’ll stay, then,” Ted said.
“Yes, thank you, for now. But I should be able to get a job soon,” Coreen added slowly. “And find a place of my own.”
Ted put down his fork and glared at her. “What’s wrong with staying here?”
“But I can’t,” she told him. “Ted, I’m not part of the family, I’m a financial burden you’ve assumed until I reach twenty-five. You don’t have to…”
“Oh, hell, I know I don’t have to,” he muttered. “Have you thought about what you’re qualified to do? And how much strength it’s going to require, working an eight-hour day? And what it will cost, even in Jacobsville, to rent rooms?”
She’d tried not to think about her situation. It showed in her face.
“It’s a big house,” he coaxed. “Sandy and I are all alone here. You’re company for her, the best friend she has.”
“But…”
“Corrie, just get well,” he said gently. “You’ve got an allowance from the legacy that will more than take care of your odds and ends until you’re completely well. Don’t think about tomorrow. There’s plenty of time for that.”
“Listen to him, will you?” Sandy said, smiling. “Honestly, I’ll go crazy if you leave now.”
“If I’m not in the way,” she faltered.
Everyone knew that meant “yes.” Ted started eating again, and his smile betrayed just a little smugness.
The trainer was an elderly man who’d worked with Thoroughbreds all his life. He had a son named Barney who came to visit on weekends, and who noticed Coreen very quickly. He was a sweet-natured man, not terribly educated, but kind. She warmed to Barney quickly and began to spend time with him when he came on the weekends to visit his father.
The problem began when Ted started spending more time at home and noticed the amount of contact Coreen was having with his trainer’s closest relation. He didn’t like it, and he stopped it. Coreen missed Barney and asked his father why he hadn’t come back.
He told her that Ted had arranged a nice job for his son, and that Barney was over the moon about it. But Coreen wondered if it had been a benevolent gesture on Ted’s part or something more. It didn’t occur to her that he might be jealous; she simply saw it as one more way he’d found to get at her.
She had to know, so she went looking for him that same morning. She found him in his office, talking on the telephone. She started to back out, but he gestured impatiently for her to come in.
He was giving somebody hell over the telephone. He finished with a curt demand and hung up before the person at the other end of the line had time for any outcry.
“Well?” he demanded, and the leftover anger in his pale eyes made her stand very still.
Chapter 7
Ted saw her apprehension and forced himself to calm down. He leaned back in h
is swivel chair with his hands behind his head and stared at her patiently. “What can I do for you?” he asked.
She hesitated. “Barney’s dad said that you found him a job in Victoria.”
He nodded slowly, and began to look more unapproachable. His silver hair caught the light and glittered like metal. “So?”
She didn’t know how to answer that. She wanted to ask if he’d sent Barney away deliberately because she was spending so much time with him, but that might sound as if she were accusing him of being jealous. Heaven knew, she didn’t think that was the reason!
“Go ahead,” he invited.
Her eyebrows arched. “Go ahead and do what?”
“Ask me if I did it to keep him away from here.”
She folded her hands in front of her. “Did you?” she asked.
His pale eyes in one glance took in her body in its pale pink short-sleeved knit top and close-fitting jeans. She was gaining a little weight, and she looked pretty. “What?” he murmured absently, distracted.
“I asked if you sent Barney away because he was spending so much time with me.”
His eyes narrowed and grew cold as they levered back up to meet hers. “As a matter of fact, I did.”
Her lips parted on an expelled breath. “Oh. I see.”
“Do you?” he replied. He leaned forward suddenly and got to his feet. “You might remember that I hired his father, not him.”
“You don’t have to justify yourself,” she said in a subdued tone as she turned away. Bitter memories intruded on the present, and her voice was almost absent as she murmured, “Anything that I like has to go, doesn’t it, even people? Barry once had a dog shot because I stroked it—”
She was stopped in midsentence by the steely lean hand that caught her arm and spun her around. She gasped at the suddenness of the action. Nor did he let her go when he had her standing stock-still.
“I didn’t have the damned man shot, I got him a good job,” he said through his teeth, and his pale eyes were flashing dangerously at her. “I do nothing to deliberately hurt you! Stop tarring me with the same brush you used on my cousin.”