“I’m not the celebrity. You are. I show up naked, they’ll call the police.”
“Think of all the women you could turn out while in prison.”
“Vivi, you can’t be serious. I know you want everyone to believe you’re this…” Christina trailed off, waving her hand up and down in Vivi’s direction. “That’s fine if that’s what you need to do. But know that I’m not wearing that dress.”
Vivi sighed, pressing her fist into the mattress. “I respect your stance, I do, but why is this a big deal?”
Christina opened her mouth to shoot off a knee-jerk reply but stopped herself. How many times had she had to try things on growing up? Or wear something “acceptable” to make her seamstress mother happy? Too many. Femme wasn’t her thing. She wasn’t that daughter. That was Michelle. And going back to that for a woman she was screwing? Hell, no. “It’s a big deal because I don’t do femme for anyone,” Christina said flatly.
There wasn’t even a flinch at the rebuttal. She and Vivi hadn’t talked about the kind of dating they were doing. So far it only had one thing missing from it to be a true Hollywood relationship—rock and roll. Sex and drugs were aplenty. That was partly why Christina had agreed to be Vivi’s plus one for this event. Award shows sucked but the after parties were worth the trouble.
Vivi didn’t let her gaze waver from Christina’s when she said to Cherlydam, “Can you guys give us a sec?”
“Sure,” her crew said in unison.
Curious, Christina leaned to the side to watch the flock of blondes file out of the bedroom. They didn’t take the clothing racks with them. She wished they had. Before Christina could draw her full attention back to the starlet, Vivi was pressed against her, her mouth seeking.
And this is why I haven’t left, Christina thought.
She balled her hand in Vivi’s hair and answered the need in kind. At some point in their relationship, the heat between them would cool down. But until then, Christina was game.
She shifted onto her back so she could flip Vivi’s strapless bra up. She caught the handful. Christina softly squeezed until she could pinch the pert tips. Vivi moaned into her mouth, then pulled away.
Her eyes were bright. A few tendrils of hair framed her face. “Can you behave now?”
Christina tensed, the haze vanishing as soon as it descended. “Behave?” Christina spat out the word as her temper flared to molten hot.
She’d thought they were getting back to the reason they were together. Instead, the promise of sex was being used to control her.
Vivi tucked a hair behind her ear, her expression impassive at the heated tone. “I figured you were sexually frustrated and needed a release valve.”
“No.”
“Okay, then it’s the actually fitting. I know you hate all of this. You’ve kind of made your opinion known by sulking on my bed for most of the fitting. I thought you understood everything that goes into—”
“I do understand.”
“Then you should get that I have to go to the awards show. That I have to dress for the occasion. It’s going to be long, hot, and feel pointless. I want you there because you’ll make it fun. Trust me. I’ll make it fun for you, too.”
Christina’s shoulders relaxed a fraction into the mattress. That was exactly what she wanted to hear. Wasn’t it? Still, she couldn’t really get comfortable with being manipulated. “I get that you have to do this. It’s part and parcel of being on a hit show. That’s not my problem, entirely.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“You want me there dressed up like someone I’m not. I didn’t agree to that. I’m not going to smile for the cameras. They can just catch my good side.”
Vivi tilted her head. “Which one is that?”
Christina smirked. “All of them.”
Vivi threw her head back and laughed. The unfettered action was a sight to behold. She lowered her chin, her lashes looking long and soft against her tanned skin.
“So modest,” she said, practically a purr. “It’s what I like about you.”
“There’s a lot to like about me. Still not wearing the dress.”
Vivi cupped her pussy. “Question: What did you think you agreed to?”
Christina’s scalp tingled at the possessive touch. Her breasts suddenly felt heavy and full. She covered Vivi’s hand and added pressure. “More of that.”
“And that’s all?”
She opened her mouth to give the answer she always gave. The answer involved the various things Vivi could do with her mouth and fingers and a promise to return every favor.
A timid knock at the door only made Vivi turn her head. “Busy. Unless you’d like to watch.”
Cherlydam didn’t pop their heads into the doorway, but one replied, “Your agent called me. She’s tried your phone a couple of times.”
“Give me a second.” Vivi brought her focus back to Christina. “We’re not done arguing.” She fixed her bra and slid off the bed.
Christina wasn’t wearing the damn dress. There was no argument to finish. But now she wasn’t sure what she and Vivi were to each other. The disagreement felt like a fight—the kind you have with someone you’re building something with.
Hell.
Did she want a real relationship? Not just hooking up at certain times and going places together, but a relationship. Things like compromise were involved. Or meeting parents.
Hell.
Vivi was fun but unrepentant about her ambitions. She wanted the Hollywood dream and had done the work to be a star. She knew a pretty face would only get her so far. She had to be hungry. And she was.
Christina respected the hell out of Vivi for making that clear even in this small way. But, really, did she want a relationship that came alongside the bright lights and need to conform? It would mean more days like this. Likely more disagreements. And make-up sex.
Definitely a pro.
On the other hand, she hadn’t fully considered what publicly dating an up-and-coming, celebrity “It” girl would mean. She’d never been on the receiving end of the spotlight. She was a long-in-the-tooth production assistant, for goodness’ sake, and liked it that way. Her life wasn’t about stability or career goals.
But did it really matter what had happened to the fun affair Christina was having with Vivi? It was starting to look like they wouldn’t even survive their first fitting.
TANEESHA
Michelle’s sigh rattled through the speaker on Taneesha’s cell phone next to her on the couch. Taneesha had gone home early after making up some excuse about stomach troubles. She couldn’t sit in her cubicle a moment longer. Not today. Not when she kept getting shut out from her own team and blocked from making even the smallest contributions. It was too much.
So she’d sprawled on the couch and called Michelle for moral support. Taneesha needed a voice of reason to tell her to stay the course. Or something—anything at all that would dislodge the knot in her stomach. Things hadn’t gotten any better at work since she “showed up” Steven in front of the CEO of Starwisp. The man could hold a grudge better than any Aries woman, and Taneesha should know, being one herself. She crossed her legs to place her laptop on her knees.
“There has to be a middle ground,” Michelle finally said after listening to the ten-minute grievance. “Just keep your head down. You have bills to pay.”
Which was true, and that only made Taneesha feel more hopeless. She clicked open World of Warcraft and frowned at her phone. “Then what the hell am I supposed to do when the person I answer to—the one who is supposed to give me assignments—simply won’t? I’m not getting work to show just how good I am.”
“Ask for more work.”
Like she had in the meeting, when she’d gotten shot down? She rubbed a hand over her forehead, trying to ease the beginning of a tension headache. “How do you do it? How do you not go into your office with both middle fingers raised high?”
“Because doing that would get me fired. I play the game
.”
How many times had Taneesha heard that adage? “That’s it?”
“Yes and no. My boss is currently making me bend over backward for a misogynistic blowhard. It sucks and frustrates me, but I play the game. One day I’ll be in charge.”
“Miche, they barely remember my name, all the while telling me I’m a valued employee. They would rather give me a title that sounds important instead of an actual position in the company is. It’s like they think I might get black girl cooties on the code and screw something up.”
Michelle laughed. “What can you do?”
She looked at her computer screen again. “At the moment, play World of Warcraft.”
Taneesha scanned the list of the characters, better known as alts, trying to decide what she was in the mood for. She didn’t have the patience for anything under level sixty. Her demon hunter didn’t have decent enough gear yet to do player vs. player or even dungeons.
“You still there?” Michelle asked.
Taneesha sighed. “I’m here. I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired. It’s starting to feel like my only existence is being mad at the assholes and then having to explain why I’m mad.”
Michelle remained quiet for a second then sighed, too. “Make a plan.”
Exasperated but amused, Taneesha shook her head. “Michelle…”
“I know.” Her laugh sounded self-deprecating. “I always say that. But when you think about your job, what do you wish you could do? What do you see yourself doing when you walk through those doors? Make a plan on how you can do it.”
At the moment, Taneesha’s ultimate fantasy was going into work and being ruthlessly honest to every coworker who questioned her skills or made a joke about women being dumb/not being able to drive/not being able to code, much less find their ass with a map and flashlight.
She’d take immense pleasure in knocking stuff off the desks of people who acted surprised that she knew her father or that her parents were married. The extra special treatment would go to anyone who told her to watch her tone or attitude because if she did, then people would be more open to listen. She’d probably double-park in their reserved spaces and forward human resources every “off color” joke they had emailed her.
That wasn’t what Michelle meant, but it’s what Taneesha had imagined countless times. There was no point in going to HR to complain. She’d be there more often than she worked if she listed the countless ways her coworkers overlooked her. Worse, she knew it had nothing to do with her skill and everything to do with the fact that she was born with a vagina and that vagina was also brown.
“Breathe,” Michelle said. “I can hear you blowing steam from here.”
“I am. The more I think about it, the madder I get. I figured if I got it off my chest, I’d feel better. Still waiting to feel better.”
“You know you have every right to be angry, don’t you?”
Taneesha did know. Her paycheck didn’t include making people feel comfortable about their clueless biases. They certainly weren’t paying her enough to swallow the bullshit they served on a daily basis.
Michelle said, “You’re quiet. That’s not a good thing.”
Taneesha didn’t want to be the kind of person who blew up at innocent bystanders, especially friends. So she took a breath. And another. Then her phone beeped. She checked for the text. Bobby wanted to know what she was doing after work. She shot him a quick reply telling him she was home, on the phone, and about to settle into World of Warcraft. She stared at the phone, waiting for Bobby’s quick reply.
“Neesha!” Michelle said.
“Oh, sorry! Bobby was texting me, probably trying to see if he could bum dinner from me.”
“Well did you hear what I said? Are you feeling better?”
“No.”
“Is there anything I can do?”
Taneesha didn’t want Pollyanna reassurances that told her to pull herself up by bootstraps. Her bosses and coworkers kept cutting her shoestrings and acting like they were innocent while hiding the scissors behind their backs.
She thought of all the things Michelle could utter to reassure her, but she knew nothing would suffice. “Say this sucks. This sucks balls. Tell me I’m awesome. Don’t tell me everything is going to be all right if I just work harder. How much harder do I have to work?” She tried again to breathe and beat back the tears that stung at her eyes. “I’m just tired, Miche. I’m so damn tired. And angry.”
Taneesha waited for the response.
“This sucks donkey balls.” Michelle rarely cussed, and definitely not while at work. This was as tough as her language could get.
Taneesha sniffed, then laughed. “I actually feel better now. Say it again. This time with more feeling.”
“This sucks hairy donkey dick!”
Taneesha pressed a hand to her stomach and laughed a little harder. It felt good. Felt like the first laugh she’d had in a while.
“Still, make a plan.”
“You were so close. So close.”
Michelle laughed. “A leopard cannot change her spots.”
“I know and that’s why I love you.” Taneesha considered her next words while switching servers to look at more of her characters. She figured she might as well lay everything out there since she and Michelle were speaking so candidly. “It’s not my business, but I’ll just say: Lay off Aditi. She’s developing an eye twitch over this second book, and your anal retentive nature is not helping.”
Taneesha finally clicked on her fully leveled Hunter. She’d just go and change the specialty from marksmanship to beast mastery for the day. She’d take less direct damage and would be able to concentrate on bigger mobs.
Michelle made a humming noise. “Can no one see my side of things?”
Taneesha shook her head. “What is your side?”
“I have an author who isn’t doing her job.”
“I’m not saying you’re wrong,” Taneesha said. “I’m saying maybe you’re treating her like an author and not like a friend. Too often. It’s starting to wear on her. On you both. You’re tense as hell about the whole thing. It’s bleeding over into your friendship.”
Michelle huffed. “As a friend, shouldn’t I tell her not to screw this up?”
That was why the entire situation was complicated, at best.
“Yeah.”
“As a friend shouldn’t she for a second think about how this might hurt me?”
“Yeah.”
“Stop saying that.”
“Sure,” Taneesha said, and then grinned.
Michelle laughed. “You brought this up and now you want to be an unbiased party. Not going to happen.”
“I can and I will.”
“Fine. You done? Did you say your piece?”
“I did, and I’m not going to pick sides in this fight. I’m not. I’m being Obi-Wan. If there’s a disturbance in the Force, then I disappear again.”
“I have to go.”
“World domination is in your plan. I understand. Though you could stick around to play some WoW with me.”
“Maybe tomorrow. My plate is just too full today. Love ya.”
“Love you.”
Taneesha should have felt better, yet her anger about work continued to simmer. Ever since the takeover, she’d tried to swallow it down, but things kept getting worse. She was determined to let herself fall into the game, to get away from thinking about work. In the digital world, she could fight evil with a sword or a bow. The bad guys always lost. When a good guy died, there was epic cinematography to detail it. That wasn’t to say she didn’t find faults with the games, or gaming period. It was why she’d gone into game development. Her code could change the world. If only she could do her job without obstructions. Yet she still believed it was possible. She had to. Otherwise, getting out of bed and going to work didn’t mean a thing.
Taneesha minimized the game to play music in iTunes instead of enduring the thematic song that played on a loop. Finally ready to play, s
he first checked to see if her alt’s guild had any planned raids. Nothing until the weekend. She cued up to a battleground. The goal was to earn as many honor points as possible, in order to buy heirlooms for her demon hunter.
It didn’t take long for chaos to ensue and for one particular player to find it amusing to follow her around. She killed him every time he tried to come her way, but after ten minutes of doing that repeatedly, she was getting annoyed. Having to kill the lame-ass warrior kept her from enjoying the PVP battle. Something about his name tickled her memory, though—so much that she looked up the name after the run was over.
Taneesha checked her guilds with various alts and found no connection. The only other possibility was that she’d seen the name at work. Her coworkers had put together a list a few weeks back for anyone who wanted to play and needed a buddy. It wasn’t an official work list, mostly because it was WoW and not one of the company’s games. Yet, one by one, everyone had been invited to play, and had even been invited to join a guild. Everyone except for Taneesha, that is. The only reason she knew about the list was from overhearing some coworkers talking about it. Steven had been bragging about being a badass, taking fellow members on raids and doing the most damage.
But the world couldn’t be that small, Taneesha reasoned.
Still she pulled up the guild’s information and checked the list against the names of the characters her coworkers had listed. Names and alts had been added in chronological order. The first person was the last person to sign up. All the usual suspects were there from the art department and the coders. In all it wasn’t a lot of people, but given that a person can have up to eleven characters on every server, there was a lot to go through. Surprise, surprise, she found the character’s name on the last page. It was one of Steven’s. He did seem like a guy who would find it amusing to antagonize another player just for kicks. He probably killed quest givers in newbie regions. Of course he’d find the one female alt on the field and do his level best to take her down. He was likely pissed he hadn’t been able to, but this was Steven. He’d have talked himself into believing it was really a guy behind the computer after all.
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