by Jodi Payne
"Because I miss you,” Aubrey repeated absurdly, his eyes tearing up. He tried to keep the emotion out of his voice, but doubted he succeeded. “I wish things were different, that I was different,” he said. “I'm sorry, Kelly. You have no idea how sorry I am."
"I don't need you different, cowboy."
"Kelly.” Aubrey sighed. “I think maybe I need some help."
"Fine. Tell me where you are."
"I'm ... out west."
"Where? There's a lot of country out there, Aubrey."
Carl appeared out of nowhere and leaned on the phone booth. He smelled of liquor and his eyes were bright. “Got time?"
Aubrey shook his head no.
"Aubrey,” Kelly said. “Come back."
"Who's on the phone?” Carl stepped closer.
"Kid, I ... hang on a minute.” Aubrey tried to cover the receiver. “Later, Carl. I'll come find you, okay?” Carl rolled his eyes, but he relented, taking a few steps back and Aubrey put the phone to his ear again. “Sorry."
Kelly had apparently overheard. “Who's Carl?"
Aubrey waited for Carl to head back into the bar. “He's ... just this guy."
"Is it serious? Are you're fucking him? Jesus, Aubrey, why didn't you tell me?” Kelly sounded upset, angry. “Sure, I get it now. You just get on with your life ... with him. You don't owe me anything. Let me go."
"He's married,” Aubrey blurted out. He just needed to, all of a sudden. Needed to level with someone, confess his sins.
"What? Married?” Kelly stammered. “Like, to a woman?"
"That's right.” Aubrey grinned ruefully, feeling a kind of manic anxiety spread through his body. He started to shake nervously and coughed to cover his emotion. “Yep. That kind of married."
The silence that fell before Kelly replied was painful. “Shit, Aubrey, what are you doing?” The kid's voice held more pity than worry, and Aubrey couldn't listen to it anymore.
"I don't know, Kelly.” He shrugged as if Kelly could see him. “I don't know. But if his wife ever finds out, someone is going to seriously kick my ass,” Aubrey laughed, knowing it sounded nervous and strained. “Again."
"Jesus, baby, come back."
"I'm so sorry, Kelly."
"Please?"
Aubrey could feel his heart beating hard in his chest and a familiar ache in the pit of his stomach. He started to just hang up, but changed his mind and put the phone back to his ear. “I gotta go."
"No, no!” Kelly pleaded. “Aubrey, don't hang up, yet. Not yet! Please? Aubrey?"
Aubrey only hesitated for a second. He hung up the receiver quickly with shaking fingers, wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands, and went into Handlebars to look for Carl.
Chapter Seventeen
Once Aubrey discovered that Carl liked it rough, fucking him became much more interesting. They still took turns, and he still didn't like bending over for Carl, but Carl usually came so fast that Aubrey barely had time to object. On the other hand, Aubrey had far more experience and usually rode Carl deep and hard, making Carl howl and grunt and sob like a baby before Aubrey was through, and then thank Aubrey for it after.
They'd just finished a nice Sunday dinner with Sue; she'd made them chicken pot pie and served a hot, crusty bread and they'd each had a couple of cold beers.
"Smoke?” Carl asked, standing up and stretching.
"Yeah,” Aubrey nodded, also standing. “Hey, Sue, that was outstanding. Thank you so much."
She smiled and nodded at him. “Always a pleasure to have you, Aubrey,” she told him. The baby, who seemed to be developing more of a personality every day, was flirting with him from her arms.
"She just gets sweeter every time I see her,” Aubrey said, reaching out to pat the child on the head.
"Come on, Aubrey. Bring your beer if you want."
"Just might do that.” Aubrey picked up his beer and followed Carl out to the barn. “My turn,” Aubrey whispered hoarsely at the man's back as they walked, his cock lengthening along Carl's hip even as he said it.
Carl chuckled, slapped himself in the ass, and picked up the pace. “I'm ready."
The house was a good distance from the barn and they were both a little winded by the time they got there, but Aubrey didn't waste a minute. He pushed Carl against the wall of the stall they regularly fucked in and Carl grunted and started to undo his jeans. “Do it like last time, Aubrey. Fast and hard, over and over again like last time? God, I loved how I felt in the morning. I could feel you for a whole day."
Aubrey laughed. “Why Carl, I do believe you've become a slut.” Carl's words had an effect, though, and the image of having nailed Carl over a couple of stacked up bales of hay made Aubrey's balls ache and his cock harden further with need. Aubrey rolled on a rubber and pulled a tube of lube from where they stashed it in a corner as he watched Carl step out of his jeans, turn his back to Aubrey, and place his hands flat against the wall.
"You know,” Aubrey licked his lips, watching the way Carl spread for him. “Whatever happened to that callous, horny bastard that poked his dick in my face while chanting ‘no penetration'?"
"Don't you dare talk to me like that!"
"Tsktsk, Carl,” Aubrey drawled, stepping up behind him and pressing his straining erection into the soft flesh of Carl's ass, “my turn, my choice."
"Just shut up and do it!” Carl ordered.
"Fuck you, Carl.” Aubrey shoved two slick fingers up Carl's ass.
"Jesus Christ!” Carl shouted to the rafters and Aubrey grinned.
"Like that, slut?"
Carl's arched his ass back toward Aubrey's fingers, and Aubrey's mouth went dry.
Over the past few months Aubrey had actually grown to admire Carl's body. And why not? He had a nice round ass, strong thighs, and his chest and back were tan and sculpted from hard work. He'd even grown to appreciate Carl more sexually. Carl had become fairly uninhibited and up front about what he wanted and how he wanted it and he gave Aubrey everything Aubrey asked for, too. The man would never be a real lover, especially not as long as he remained in his marriage, but there was something to be said for teaching someone exactly what you liked. As a fuck buddy, Carl wasn't a bad way to get off at all.
Aubrey stretched Carl until Carl was moaning. When the man spread his legs wider and his body started to rock back into Aubrey's touch, Aubrey removed his fingers and stepped close to Carl's back, nesting his cock in the warm pocket between Carl's thighs. “Want me?” he asked, whispering roughly in Carl's ear.
"Fuck, yes!” Carl's tone was almost pleading. “Aubrey ... come on, man."
"Beg.” Aubrey ordered, playing with him.
"Beg?"
"Beg,” he repeated. “Plead."
Carl snorted indignantly. “I'm not going to beg you, Aubrey."
"Then I guess you can find yourself another man to stick his cock up your ass."
"Aubrey..."
"I can't hear you!” Aubrey stepped away, grinning, watching how Carl physically leaned farther away from the wall, seeking Aubrey's heat.
"Jesus Christ. Fine. Please."
"I'm sorry?'
"Please?” Carl sighed.
"Please ... what?” Aubrey taunted. “Take out the trash?"
"Please fuck me."
"Ah, now we're getting somewhere.” Aubrey stepped close and slid his fingers into Carl's hole again.
"Ah! Yes!” Carl arched back at him. “More, Aubrey."
"More?"
"Fuck! More, please.” Carl was panting now, riding Aubrey's fingers slowly and his cock stood out stiffly from his hips. “Please, fuck me! Aubrey! Jesus, I'll say anything you want, just please..."
Aubrey grinned, pulled his fingers out, and took a step back, tugging Carl's hips with him. He pushed the head of his cock inside Carl and past the tight ring of muscle, making Carl groan and swear. He eased himself in deep until their bodies were pressed together, but he didn't take off like a rocket the way Carl had begged him to. He decided instead to take i
t slow and see if he could really make Carl scream.
"More. More!” Carl arched his back as he tried to force Aubrey to move faster. “Oh, God, Aubrey."
"Hot when it's slow, yeah?” Aubrey certainly thought so. Carl moaned and his fingers curled into fists against the rough wall, making Aubrey grin knowingly as Carl's unspoken submission set his blood on fire. “Never had it like this, have you?"
"Aubrey, please,” Carl begged, this time without any prompting.
Evidently, Carl found the slow pace frustrating, but his protests were weak. His body writhed and his head rolled on his shoulders as Aubrey took him, sliding in balls deep and then out again, taking up a rhythm that was nothing like the frantic fucking they usually dove right into. Every stroke was meant to count, nudging Carl's prostate gently each time Aubrey buried his shaft in the heat of Carl's welcoming ass.
It went on for a long while. By the time Aubrey started to tremble with a need he could no longer control, the shadows were long on the walls and the streaks of sunlight that cut through the stall were a deep golden color. Carl had already come once and he seemed on the verge of another orgasm; he was drenched head to toe with sweat and even though Aubrey had lowered them both to their knees a while ago, Aubrey had an arm around Carl's waist to help support him. Aubrey picked up the pace until his hips were thrusting urgently and their bodies slammed into one another, Carl's ass making muted slapping sounds against Aubrey's thighs. He pulled Carl close to his chest and held their bodies tightly together, shaking hard as his climax surged through him, drawn right up from his toes. Carl shivered and cried out, his cock spurting like a fountain into the soft bedding.
They stayed there, bodies locked together until Aubrey's vision cleared and he could move again. He rolled his hips, letting his spent cock slip from Carl's body, and groaned as he sat back on his heels. Carl whimpered at the loss, and turned his head, catching Aubrey's mouth with his own.
Aubrey pulled back and blinked at him for a second, but then kissed him back gently, and Carl moaned into his mouth.
Their kiss lasted only a few seconds, but it was just long enough for it to stun them both. Carl pulled away slowly, still trying to catch his breath. He looked damp and tired and very well-fucked. “Fucking hell, Aubrey. That was ... Christ, what the fuck was that?"
Aubrey, thinking there just might be hope for him after all, grinned and started to answer, but was interrupted.
"Looked like sex to me, Carl,” a woman's voice cut through the sunlight and the haze of hormones, making Carl gasp and Aubrey sigh and shake his head. “How could you?” Susan asked simply, and then turned and left the barn. Aubrey wasn't sure which one of them she'd been speaking to.
"Shit,” Carl started to panic and scrambled for his clothing, pulling his jeans on haphazardly and stumbling after Susan at the same time. “Go home, Aubrey. I'll talk to you soon. I'm sorry."
Aubrey nodded, taking his time about getting dressed again. So much for that.
Chapter Eighteen
He'd expected the knock at his door the following morning, but what Aubrey hadn't counted on was the burly man that kicked at it hard enough to knock the damn thing down and the scowling posse that was behind him. The only man he recognized was Carl, who looked like he hadn't slept at all, and had obviously been through a fight of his own. The combination made Aubrey very uneasy.
"I've ... been instructed to tell you,” Carl said in a resigned but warning tone, “that you need to get out of town, Aubrey.” Carl's eyes told Aubrey other things that he clearly couldn't say out loud. “Right now."
Aubrey glanced at the men standing behind him, searched his face for a moment, and then nodded, careful to keep his own tone neutral. “All right, Carl."
After that, Carl stood mutely leaning against the kitchen counter until Aubrey's truck was packed. Those boys made quick work of stacking his suitcase and a couple of boxes in the truck bed for him. Aubrey studied Carl's face and the angry, purple bruises every chance he got, but Carl said nothing more to him. Not one blessed word. Aubrey figured he was damn lucky he was being allowed to leave in one piece. Whatever Carl had said to these men to earn himself the beating instead of Aubrey had secured Aubrey his freedom, and he decided to respect that for what it was and not to say anything either. Aubrey whispered a ghost of his gratitude on his way out the door, but he had no idea whether Carl had heard him.
He'd driven even farther north this time, across the state line into Wyoming. When he couldn't stay awake any longer he pulled in at a truck stop where he bought a bottle of whiskey and paid for a night in the motel in advance. The next day he asked about a job at the filling station there and picked up some minimum wage work. It had him out in all kinds of weather and at all times of the day or night depending on his shift, but it paid for his room and his whiskey and that seemed to be all he could bring himself to care about anymore.
He didn't try to contact Carl. He felt responsible, but helpless to do anything about what happened. He'd considered trying to get in touch once or twice, but he figured if that posse of Susan's “friends” had an eye on Carl and Carl was toeing the line, it was better not to risk it. Aubrey had only been there a short while, after all, and he figured he'd be forgotten if he just let it go. They'd been wrong anyway, both of them horribly wrong, and he was sick enough about it without hearing how miserable Carl was, too.
And if Carl was miserable, he could only imagine how Kelly must feel. Nobody had forced them apart but Aubrey's idiotic pride. He was a coward to leave town without considering what had happened between Kelly and him, the kid was right about that. Aubrey was doing what was easiest when trouble knocked at his door, picking up and moving on, telling his troubles to a bottle of whiskey that couldn't talk back. He knew he had a genuine problem with that bottle now, and that doing what was easy meant losing himself to it.
He got laid pretty regularly, working where he did. Lonely or just plain horny men driving rigs on regular routes, coming in for a night here and a night there on their way to someplace, and stopping by again on their way back home. None of them wanted anything more from him than sex and Aubrey liked it that way. Slowly but surely he lost track of days and nights and booze and sleep, keeping to himself and blending in to the place until he was pretty sure he was invisible.
He probably could have gone on that way, pumping gas and fucking around, at least until the alcohol got him. But someone or something finally intervened, jarring him awake with a message as sharp as a slap in the face.
It was a sunny Sunday morning and the air was crisp with winter on the way. Aubrey had been on duty since before sunrise and was just coming off his break, bolstered by a shot of whiskey, when the large, gooseneck horse trailer pulled in. It didn't stop anywhere near the pumps, instead it pulled rather awkwardly and too fast into the lot near a grassy area where travelers usually walked their dogs. Two men jumped out of the cab and hurried to the back end.
Squinting into the sunlight, Aubrey could see the trailer was rocking slightly and knew there was trouble. A deeply ingrained instinct took over and he left his post at the pumps without a second thought, jogging across the parking lot to see if he could help. One of the men was shouting to the other as Aubrey arrived.
"Ho ... ho there, girl. Joey! Can you reach her through the feed window? Get hold of—” The trailer rocked again and the guy changed his plans. “Never mind Joe, we gotta get ‘er out o'there."
"Can I help?"
The guy who was shouting the orders stared at Aubrey for a moment, apparently confused by his sudden appearance.
"Sorry,” Aubrey said. “Saw the trailer rocking from the station. Used to run a horse barn."
"Well, then. Hell yes, friend. Second one in on the right, she's panicked. I'm Len, this here's my son, Joey.” He tugged the loading ramp out and seated it securely, then shifted and put his hands on the bolt lock holding the loading doors closed. “Get clear you two, in case they bolt."
Joey tossed Aubrey a lead rop
e and he and Aubrey did just that, standing a few feet away on either side of the trailer, each ready to rope a horse or hook their lead onto any part of their halters that they could manage. Len threw the bolt and jumped back as the doors swung open and Aubrey keep himself clear as they flipped around to hit the either side of the trailer loudly. Both of the rear horses were a little keyed up and stumbled out backward, slipping and failing to get decent footing on the metal ramp. That was just as well, as it slowed them down enough that Joey and Aubrey were both able to secure their leads, get the animals clear, and tether each horse to the far side of the trailer where they'd be secure and out of the way.
The panicking mare, however, wasn't so cooperative. Joey dove into the trailer to help the animal that was next to her get clear of the trailer, and then Aubrey, without a thought for his own safety, hurried in to help the distressed animal. She was throwing her head and squealing, but Aubrey managed to get a lead on her. He reached up and grabbed one sensitive ear and she ducked her head toward him, giving him the leverage he needed to pull her nose down so they were eye to eye.
"Shh. Relax. Just relax, sweetheart. Shh. That's a girl.” Aubrey's practiced tone was smooth and soothing, meant to calm and reassure the mare. She took a minute to respond, but even as he fought with all his strength to hold her head down, he kept his tone steady and quiet and his words languid and low. Finally, though she still rolled her eyes at him and bared her teeth some, she snorted and her squealing stopped. “There now, there's a girl. That's the way.” Without changing his stance or his tone at all, he signaled to Joey. “Joey, you come on in here and free that left hoof. Quickly now, but move quietly. Hush, little girl, it's all right, now.” Aubrey let go of her ear and gently stroked her under her eye to help keep her calm.
Joey did exactly as he was told and got out of the way quickly so that Aubrey could relax his grip a bit and let the mare right herself. Still talking, his voice almost like song, he led the mare out of the trailer and off onto the grass where she was shielded away from the traffic. He watched her leg as she went, but she wasn't favoring it. Seemed like she was okay.