by Jodi Payne
Gale smelled great. Aubrey figured he must have showered right before coming out to Charlie's. Every time Gale kissed him Aubrey was assaulted by the sharp, clean scent of soap and aftershave and the barest hint of good, honest sweat. Their mouths clashed, their tongues tangled, and they fell together on Gale's bed, both of them breathless and grinning like fools.
"My fucking boots,” Gale grunted, lying on his back and struggling with them.
"Your boots and my goddamn jeans,” Aubrey answered, writhing desperately as he pushed them down over his hips. He chuckled at the way the two of them made the bed bounce and shake without anything remotely sexy going on.
Finally, Gale's boots hit the hardwood floor with two loud thumps, one right after the other. “Yes, your goddamn jeans. Oh, look at that cock, standing up so fine for me. Jesus.” Gale shoved at the fabric and Aubrey's jeans finally slithered to the floor with Gale's boots. Gale bent low over Aubrey's hips. “May I?"
"Fuck yes,” Aubrey answered, shoving gently at Gale's head. Gale nuzzled him, Aubrey's cock first and then Aubrey's balls, before circling his tongue around Aubrey's sac and up the length of his erection. “God, yes."
"Mmm. God, yes,” Gale agreed, and took the head of Aubrey's cock into his mouth. He closed his fingers around Aubrey's shaft and stroked, making deliciously raunchy noises in his throat.
It seemed like Gale was really enjoying himself, the way he tasted and touched and licked and teased Aubrey, taking his own sweet time. Determined to make a good night of it, Aubrey relaxed and let Gale do as he liked, let himself be led down a winding path toward his orgasm instead of pushing and taking the lead like he usually did. “Fuck, that's good,” he heard himself say, and his friend Gale seemed to agree.
It started slow, need twisting and spinning randomly in his gut, but little by little as Gale intensified his efforts everything started to narrow down to Aubrey's aching cock and the hot mouth around it. He tangled his fingers in Gale's hair. He lifted his hips off the bed a little, and then a little more until he knew he was begging with his body. “Oh, God. Fuck. Fuck, yes!” He babbled and Gale moaned back at him, swallowing him deep.
Aubrey tumbled headlong into his orgasm, feeling his body rock at first and then buck and clench and go still as he shot into Gale's mouth. Gale didn't balk at swallowing, taking every damn drop and then some, encouraging Aubrey's cock to stay hard even after Aubrey had nothing left to give him.
Moments later, through the dim fog of afterglow, he felt Gale's strong but gentle hands push at his hips, coaxing and turning him onto his stomach, and Aubrey firmly shushed the part of his mind that protested; the part of his mind where his misplaced pride lived. He'd expected more of a fight, but he was thrilled to discover that he was actually able to let it go. No inner struggle, no angst, no second thoughts about it. His mind and body seemed to easily accept, for the first time in his life, that this particular encounter was about feeling good, about having a good time. It had nothing to do with which one of them was bigger, stronger, or more masculine. No one needed to win at this game, the goal was for both of them to reach the finish line.
He groaned as he felt Gale's slick fingers sink into him.
"Okay?” Gale asked him.
Aubrey nodded. “Okay. Yeah,” he sighed. “Totally okay. Great.” He pushed back to meet Gale's fingers, letting himself enjoy the pressure and the slight stretch. “Good."
Gale chuckled. “Good.” He slipped his fingers in and out, moving them in circles when they were inside, and Aubrey bent one knee up and out to the side to give him more room. “More?” Gale asked.
Aubrey nodded, panting. “More. Yes."
"All right, Aubrey. I'm hard as hell, man, and I'm trying to be patient, but I'm seriously hurting back here."
"Hear ya',” Aubrey said. “I'm good. Come on, fuck me, Gale."
"Oh, I do like they way you talk, friend."
Gale's fingers disappeared and an empty foil wrapper landed up near Aubrey's head. Moments later he could feel Gale's cock nudge at him, gently at first and then a little more insistent. “Ready?” Gale's voice sounded hot and rough. “Fuck, please tell me you're ready."
"Go.” Aubrey nodded and Gale sunk right in, steady and deep.
"Fuck. Jesus, you're tight, Aubrey, fucking beautiful,” Gale was saying as his thighs finally made contact with Aubrey's ass.
It had always been a struggle with Aubrey if he was going to end up taking cock up his ass. That was how he'd always thought of it. Not as sex, not when he was on the receiving end, but as something to be endured until it was his turn to get off. Gale was taking it easy, talking to him, rocking them together with his long, purposeful thrusts, and Aubrey started to arch and moan and push back, finding he wanted this, wanted more, wanted Gale to move faster.
"You're as easy as they come Aubrey, I fucking love it,” Gale said, the humor in his voice as real as the need. “Oh, God.” Gale started moving faster. Gale pulled on Aubrey's hips until Aubrey was able to get his knees under him.
And oh, Aubrey liked that. It gave him a little more control over the depth, let him meet each of Gale's thrusts with as much or as little force as he wanted. It also gave him the ability to change the angle of Gale's thrusts and that turned out to be the best part of all.
"Shit!” he shouted as he helped Gale nail his gland. “Jesus! Right there. Right ... there!” He held still then, tangling both his fists in the sheets and dropping his forehead to the mattress, letting his body take the brunt of Gale's heavy, forceful thrusts while Gale slammed into that sweet spot over and over and over.
His cock ached again and he reached for it, grunting and stroking himself. Gale was making hot, sexy noises behind him; cussing and begging between moans and sighs. “More, Gale! More! Fuck, I'm gonna come. Oh, shit, Gale! I'm gonna..."
"Now, cowboy. Nownownow!"
Fireworks exploded behind Aubrey's eyes as he came, the thrusts behind him steady and heavy and pushing Aubrey's cock through his own fist for him. He felt the steel inside him jerk and the thrusting stutter and then there was a long groan and a heavy weight against his back and ass.
Cowboy.
When the light show faded there was nothing but Kelly in his mind. Kelly's warm face, his smooth, tan skin, his beautiful body, his grass green eyes. Kelly, the only person that had ever inspired Aubrey to be a better man. And Kelly's lips were moving. They were telling him to come on home.
Chapter Twenty Three
Aubrey remembered clearly the time when he believed that Kelly deserved better than someone like him. He'd been angry and controlling and selfish. He'd had something to prove to himself, to the world, and to Kelly, about strength and needs and desires; about masculinity and love. He'd had a chip on his shoulder the size of Texas. And he'd never expected anyone to accept him because he never could accept himself.
He didn't feel that way anymore. He was sober now, he was capable of holding down a job, and he was in love. He'd been places that he'd never expected to go, mentally as well as physically, since the day he'd left Kelly and the farm behind. The endless highways and twisting country roads had left his mind and body well traveled and he felt it. He was tired, as tired as he'd ever been, but he felt optimistic for the first time in his life.
He was on the road by dawn with a tank full of gas and the few things he owned packed into the truck bed. It was a long drive, several days through Denver, Kansas, and Missouri, which gave him plenty of time to think. He crashed in his car along the way, having less than three hundred dollars to his name and even that was dwindling fast between food and fuel. Finally back in Tennessee, he stopped at a motel about half a day from Haley's farm. He endured the disapproving look from the counter clerk to pay a day rate so he could shower and shave, change his clothes, and catch a few hours of sleep.
He'd been completely confident about his decision since the moment he'd made it. No second thoughts, no doubts or misgivings, not one single impulse to change his mind in the days since he
hit the road.
Until now.
He was less than an hour from Haley's farm. Less than an hour from his past, from the place he associated with some of his best and some of his worst moments. Less than an hour from Kelly, and the anxiety was really settling in. He had butterflies in his stomach, his palms were damp, and he couldn't quite sit still, even driving. It had been a cold day and it was getting colder as night came on, the setting sun was casting bright pink and purple light on the few stray clouds and the rest of the sky was turning a deep night blue.
But all Aubrey could think about was grass green eyes.
The ‘what if’ scenarios started up on the long country road out to the farm. What if Kelly really did have someone else? What if Haley wouldn't hire him back? Aubrey finally leaned down and flipped the radio on to distract himself. It worked, though, mostly because it took him a while to find a radio station. He'd forgotten how hard it was to get anything but talk out here. The sky was growing dark as he settled on public radio, and then the tall iron gates of Haley's farm rose out of the dry, dusty roadside.
He flipped on his headlights as he headed up the drive, though really he hardly needed them. Every bump in the road, every pothole in the dirt, every curve was so familiar he probably could have driven it with his eyes closed. He even remembered to steer off to the right a bit just as he pulled through the gate up by the mares’ barn, so he wouldn't hit the tree roots there.
A couple of men, neither of whom Aubrey recognized, stuck their heads out of the barn as he pulled up. One of them made his way toward the truck and Aubrey stayed put, letting the guy do just what Aubrey would have done had a stranger pulled up after dark.
"Howdy,” the man said, touching his hat in greeting. “What can I do ya'?"
"I'm looking for Kelly Ayers,” Aubrey said in the friendliest tone he could manage.
"Oh, yeah?” The guy grinned widely. “No kiddin'?"
Aubrey raised an eyebrow. “Uh, no kiddin'. No, sir."
"Well, he's up in the barn, but he didn't mention no one comin’ t'call."
"I'm a friend,” Aubrey said.
"I just bet you are.” The guy turned away and shouted up to the barn as he made his way back to his friends. “Kelly, there's a guy here t’ see ya'."
There was some hooting and hollering, and some laughter, and then Kelly appeared, slapping a few shoulders and squinting into Aubrey's headlights. Damn, but he looked good. Worn jeans, flannel shirt and a field coat, beat-up hat, dirty boots and all. Aubrey's chest ached for him as Kelly took a few steps toward the truck.
"Don't stay out too late, son!” a familiar voice shouted. Ray appeared in the doorway and there was a familiar face to go with it.
"Shut up, Stedman,” Kelly shouted back at Ray over his shoulder.
Aubrey remembered himself and reached out to shut the engine off, the blinding headlights going out as the engine quit. Kelly stopped in his tracks and Aubrey figured he'd recognized the truck. Aubrey stepped out, closing the heavy door behind him, and jammed his hands in his pockets. He looked at Kelly and then at the ground, and then back at Kelly again, but Kelly stayed silent, staring at Aubrey like he was a ghost.
"Hello, kid,” Aubrey said, finally unable to stand the silence any longer.
"Jesus Christ,” Kelly replied just loud enough that Aubrey could hear him. “Jesus fucking Christ."
"It's Aubrey, actually. You forget already?"
"Shut up, you bastard, and let me think."
Aubrey started to protest, but then he shut up. He'd had hours of driving to process this moment. Kelly had had something closer to one minute. The kid stared at him for a while, searching his eyes, looking over his face, his body, and then back to his eyes again. Kelly took a step toward Aubrey, his face still serious, and reached out and laid a hand on Aubrey's arm.
"You're real."
"Fuck, I hope so."
"You're okay?"
"Better, now.” He smiled at Kelly.
Kelly still seemed kind of shocked. “You ... look good."
"You look great, Kelly."
"Aubrey!” Ray's voice interrupted them and Aubrey looked up over Kelly's shoulder to see Ray coming toward them, followed by a handful of other men he remembered well. “Goddamn, Aubrey, it's good to see you.” Ray extended his hand and when Aubrey took it, Ray pulled him in for a quick, manly hug.
Kelly stepped politely out of the way and Aubrey felt a twinge of guilt, but the kid smiled and shrugged when Aubrey gave him an apologetic glance.
Aubrey was hustled up to the barn where he was treated to some grub and a lot of talk about what had been going on since he left. Some of the guys had moved on, but there were several new cowboys and hands and they seemed like a good-natured group. Ray was ruler of the roost, it seemed, having been there the longest and knowing Aubrey the best, and he had the most to say. Aubrey was really enjoying the warm welcome, but before long he found he could barely keep his eyes open. If several days on the road with only a few hours’ sleep at night hadn't worn him out enough, a few hours of friendly talk, the hearty beef stew, and thick, crusty bread had finally done him in.
He regretted being so tired, though. It was nearly midnight and apart from his arrival, he and Kelly hadn't gotten a chance to say three private words to each other.
Nate, one of the new guys—well, one of the newer guys, Aubrey was the “new guy” now—took Aubrey's empty bottle of root beer from him. “So are you stayin’ on, Jacek? Or just passing through?"
Aubrey could feel Kelly look up, and then the kid turned those eyes on him and Aubrey swallowed before meeting them with his own. “Hope to be stayin', friend,” he replied.
Those beautiful green eyes lit up like a fucking Christmas tree.
"Right, then,” Ray's voice interrupted, again. “Come bunk up with the group of us, Jacek, and tomorrow I'll take you down to talk with Haley and we'll see if he will find you something to keep you busy."
"Oh, I can sleep in my truck,” Aubrey said, and glanced at Kelly, inviting him to come along.
"Shut up, Jacek. Ain't gonna let a brother sleep in his damn car. Plenty o’ room."
Aubrey sighed, defeated, but beside him, Kelly snorted out a laugh.
Chapter Twenty Four
Aubrey paced on the porch of the Big House, arms crossed and trying not to look as impatient and anxious as he felt. He could see Kelly in his peripheral vision, hands in his pockets, leaning against the side of the house. The kid was watching him and chewing some kind of sweet smelling gum. Aubrey couldn't ignore the kid completely, so every now and then he'd look in Kelly's direction and shrug wordlessly. Kelly would just shrug back and grin at him.
Completely helpless to Ray's deeply ingrained southern hospitality, Aubrey had spent the night up in the loft with the rest of the guys. They'd given him a top bunk, up above a solid chunk of cowboy that was damn near as wide in the shoulders as he was tall. They called him “Packer", though Aubrey hadn't figured out if that was his last name or a nickname. From his bunk he couldn't see Kelly at all, which in the end he figured was a good thing for his libido, though it didn't help him sleep any better. He spent a long time lying awake, trying to pick out Kelly's snoring among the cacophony of heavily breathing, sleeping men.
He hadn't been able to, and in the morning Kelly told him in the brief moment they'd had alone that it was because he hadn't been sleeping either.
It wasn't fair, the way they had to remain so goddamn chaste as they stood there on Haley's porch like a couple of kids in the doghouse waiting to see the principal. Aubrey tried to find patience, telling himself that there was all the time in the world for them once these few details had been worked out, but it was a practically useless endeavor. Aubrey's fingers itched to touch Kelly, his body longed to hold Kelly and smell him and taste his mouth. Kelly's presence seemed to have gravity of its own; it was strong and tangible and it was all Aubrey could do stay out of the constant, magnetic pull of the kid's eyes while he waited for Haley t
o call him inside.
He looked over at Kelly again and the kid made a rude gesture, indicating that he had to piss, then pointed up to the barn. Aubrey nodded reluctantly, and watched until Kelly disappeared from view. Kelly was gone a while, longer than Aubrey could really stand, it seemed, and he found himself panicking a little bit inside. He stared up at the barn like maybe he'd made Kelly up; as if maybe all of this was another hallucination, a wishful flashback brought on by Aubrey's detoxification.
But just when he thought he couldn't take the wait any longer, Ray opened the screen door.
"Come on in, Aubrey."
Aubrey glanced up to the barn once more, but, not seeing Kelly, he followed Ray into the house.
"Well, well. Look what the cat dragged in, Thelma.” Haley smiled from where he sat in a big easy chair by the fireplace. His left hand was in a cast and his right foot was wrapped in an ace bandage and was propped up on a stool.
"Aubrey!” Thelma hurried across the room to him and tucked her hands around his biceps, smiling. “Lord, you look tired, Aubrey. Are you eating? Oh, it's so good to see you again,” she said, and then went up on her toes and planted a light kiss on his cheek.
Aubrey smiled back at her. “Howdy, ma'am. You're looking as beautiful as ever."
Thelma eyed him. “Nice try, Aubrey, but you're still in the doghouse for leaving us in the first place."
Aubrey shrugged. “I believe I was handed my hat, ma'am."
"Oh now, you know Haley,” Thelma chided just above a whisper. “If you'd waited a week he'd've changed his damn fool mind.” Thelma winked at him, and Aubrey was a lot less worried about whether or not he had a job after that. “And besides, you never answered my letters."
"I read them, ma'am. I read every single one.” He'd kept them, in fact, unwilling or unable to let them go.
"I know, Aubrey.” Thelma smiled warmly at him.