Begin Forwarded Message
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the little therapy tool kit i send to friends:)
It’s been a rough year
ps I made a bunch of sweet potato pie, it is here, come over
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hi love,
so so good to see you and hang last night!! I know I know I owe you another email about book things but I’m sending this stuff before I forget!
Ok, so, this my therapist, here’s her email address. Like I said, I love her, and I think you’d like her. She also has a lot of colleagues she’s happy to recommend. Also, a friend highly recommended this woman.
I usually use Psychology Today to search for a new psychiatrist (if I’m looking for someone to also prescribe my medication) or psychologist (if I’m already working with a doctor prescribing my medicine, and I’m looking for talk therapy). You can filter by insurance, by gender, by specialties, by faith, etc. Therapy for Black Girls (therapyforblackgirls.com) is also AMAZING. Both databases have doctors’ bios, information about their experience and their approaches to treatment, contact info, and sometimes rates.
If you let me know specific things you’re looking for, I am happy to help search, because I know this is the WORST part, especially if you’re, like, in it. And remember, it seriously is like going on a first date or a job interview or something; you’re seeing if you can work together, get each other. You don’t have to just settle, and it’s worth taking the time to find a good fit—trust me.
When I’m searching, I find it helpful to write a little paragraph about what I’m looking for when I reach out for a consultation. That way I can just copy and paste, and it doesn’t feel like a whole uphill thing every time.
Here’s the one I used this last go-around, just as an example:
I’m searching for a psychiatrist to aid me in talk therapy and medication management. Though I’ve been in therapy and taking antidepressants fairly steadily for the past fifteen years to treat my depression and anxiety, I recently moved and I’m looking for a new psychiatrist. Collaborative and long-term treatment with a doctor is very important to me, and an ideal therapist for me is one who is insightful, culturally sensitive/aware (as a black American woman, my place in society intersects with my depression), and sensitive to my busy and unpredictable schedule as a working writer. If you’re accepting new patients and think we may be a good fit to work together, I’d love to talk about your method/philosophies and costs. If you do not prescribe medication, I’d also like to know if you work with any psychiatrists to collaborate on my medication management. I can be reached at this email or the number in my signature. Thank you!
I’m happy you’re doing this. I’m here to help in any way I can. I’ll check in soon!
xoxoxo love you
mp
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
There is no way I can thank everyone who made this book happen; who influenced so many versions of me between then and now. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for my parents, who never once let me fall, and who have accepted me again and again. I wouldn’t be as strong as I am without my many therapists over the years, especially Susan, Catherine, Genevieve, June, and Wendy.
Nick and Katie, there are no words, but if there were, they’d be this book. Thank you. Nick, for everything, forever; and KT, for all the hugs and eye rolls and crying sessions and adventures and for mailing the Yellow Notebook as soon as I needed it. Y’all helped make this book and this person.
Infinite thanks to my warrior-agents Dan & Tina, for helping me—making me—do the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and with so much grace in the face of my whiny resistance. You made me into someone I’d never thought I’d be. And huge love to Laura and Ava of ICM, too, for lighting the next steps.
Kate Sullivan, what an eye you have. Every edit and question and suggestion pushed and challenged me, and I’m so grateful to you for giving me the space and time to make a good book into a great one. Alex Hightower, you’re the best editor/supporter I could ask for! Thanks for cosigning emo references and black girl jokes. And eternal gratitude to Beverly Horowitz, Jillian Vandall, and the entire Delacorte Press team for welcoming this poet to your family.
For all the infinite moments, thanks to Kirsten, Luke, Bestfriend Zach Andrews, Courtney, other Courtney, Drew, and everyone who made me a mix or let me pick the music. Thanks and apologies to my high school class and its various characters. Every episode made an impact on me—the good, the obnoxious, the hilarious, and the ridiculous. (No hard feelings?)
Thank you to Kaz and Parks, for letting this weird little writer bloom.
To Jami Attenberg, for being the teacher and sister I always wanted. To Julie Buntin, for the guidance and encouragement and glasses of wine from the very beginning of this process. To Adam Dalva for all the close and generous reading. To Shira Erlichman and Diamond Sharp for the strength. To my always-supporters—Clea, Angel, Vivian, Alex, Leah, Tommy, Harlan, and the husbands—for keeping me afloat and cheering me on and making me laugh and giving me permission. To Tampa Bae Mike Matesich, for teaching me the difference between “Morgan Parker writing a novel” and “a Morgan Parker novel.”
Coco, I love you. Here’s the book we needed then, and here’s to everything we’ve overcome, hand-in-hand.
Thomas, thanks for the name Malcolm, even though I never knew you called dibs. Thank you for all the jokes and pep talks and drives. This is for you, and for us.
To everyone I forgot: I’ll get you in the next one.
Finally, to all my readers: hang in there. I love you.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Morgan Parker is the author of the poetry collections Magical Negro, There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncé, and Other People’s Comfort Keeps Me Up at Night. Her work has appeared in numerous publications, and she is the recipient of a National Endowment for the Arts Literature Fellowship, winner of a Pushcart Prize, and a Cave Canem graduate fellow.
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