Monster World

by Michael James Ploof

  When we leveled out, we shot across the water to the island. We’d pulled ahead a bit, and the Goblin King was still flying high.

  “We’re going to make it!” I said. “But we’re still going to have to lose them on the island.”

  Our pursuers were gaining on us again, but we were now less than a thousand yards from land. I saw thick jungle, rocky cliffs, and sandy beach, and I steered us toward that green, tangled haven.

  We had almost reached the island when something exploded beside us. The bat shrieked and veered to one side.

  “What the hell was that?”

  “The Goblin King’s spell,” she said.

  “Spell? Like magic spell?”

  “He is very powerful.”

  “That’s just fucking gr—”

  Another explosion nearly took my head off. The glittering green spell arced downward and hit the water, sending up a plume of seawater. I growled and pushed the bat into a dive, through the ocean spray, and into the jungle.

  Leaves and branches slapped my face as we tore through the thick foliage, and I prayed we wouldn’t get tangled in the vines draped from tree to tree. The bat maneuvered deftly, however, and dropped down under the thick canopy, where sunlight rarely penetrated. It was dark, and a musty smell was thick in the stagnant air.

  The Goblin King and one of his warriors were still in pursuit. With any luck, the third bat and rider were trapped in the vines, or better yet, maybe they’d slammed into a tree and died.

  “Look out!” Eva cried, and I veered as another green writhing ball of magic shot past my left ear.

  “I’m getting really sick of this asshole,” I said and yanked on the reins, turning the bat.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Fighting back,” I growled.

  I retrieved the pizza shovel, gripped the reins in the other hand, and screamed bloody murder. The Goblin King came into clear view. He was nothing like I thought he would look. For one, he was handsome. He was tall, with too-long arms and legs, like the Pumpkin King from Nightmare Before Christmas. His green skin shone like emeralds, and his gleaming eyes promised me pain. Sharp cheekbones and a high forehead gave him a hawkish look, and his black, pointed goatee gave him a devilish appearance.

  He cocked back his arm as we approached, and his palm glowed with magic. From the bat gliding beside him, the other goblin pointed a crossbow at us.

  The Goblin King released his spell at the same time his wingman fired. I blocked with my enchanted weapon, and both the spell and the bolt exploded on impact. We flew through the smoke and sparkling remnants of the spell toward the Goblin King.

  I swung at him as he passed on our left, and the pizza shovel should have taken his head off. But he leaned back impossibly fast and pulled a Neo from The Matrix, and my blade sailed over his hooked nose.

  I turned around abruptly, and so did the Goblin King and his wingman, and soon we were barreling toward each other again. Another spell erupted from the king’s palm, and once again I blocked it. I expected another magical blast, but instead he unsheathed an obsidian sword at least seven feet long and flew at me like an aerial jouster.

  A crossbow bolt zipped by, barely missing me, and Doughboy jumped off my shoulder and landed on the face of the Goblin King’s bat. I swung my blade, but the Goblin King’s mount lurched and spiraled downward. I watched their descent with mixed emotions—excitement that the Goblin King was out of the fight and fear for my buddy.

  The Goblin King, Doughboy, and the bat crashed hard on the jungle floor. The princess cheered, but the celebration was short-lived. The other goblin was hot on our tail.

  “Hold on!” I warned and pushed the bat into another dive.

  We flew through vines and tall ferns, over giant dead logs, and under leaning trees. The goblin stuck to us like glue. I decided to change tactics and steered for the canopy. The bat protested, but it followed my commands, and a moment later we emerged from the darkness of the jungle into the sunlight.

  I turned around, wind buffeting my hair. Any minute the other goblin would break through, and I meant to get the jump on him.

  “There!” I yelled and steered toward the goblin and his mount.

  He saw us coming, but we were approaching too fast for him to get away. He fired and the bolt got past my pizza shovel and thudded into my shoulder. There was no pain. A quick glance told me the bolt had stuck in the pauldron.

  “My turn!” I crowed.

  We flew past the goblin and swung hard. My target was the bat, and I scored a direct hit. The sharp, curved side of the pizza shovel sliced through the bat’s head, along his neck, and severed the wing at the shoulder. The bat and rider spiraled into the canopy.

  The urge to turn around and look for Doughboy was nearly overwhelming, but he had sacrificed himself to give us a chance to escape, and I wasn’t going to let that be in vain.

  “Poor Doughboy,” said Eva, and squeezed me a little tighter.

  “Maybe he survived,” I said hopefully.

  “Nothing could kill that little rascal, but I worry about him being all alone on the island.”

  “When this is all over, maybe I can come back and find him.”

  “But we don’t even know where we are. The gods only know where that storm blew us.”

  “We’ll figure it out once we find charted land. I remember a chain of islands on the map.”

  “I hope so. Do you think the Goblin King is dead?”

  “You would know better than me,” I said with a shrug. “How powerful is he anyway?”

  “He practices the ancient dark arts,” she said solemnly. “Those green spells he fired at us—I’ve never seen anything like them.”

  “Is magic common on this world?”

  “It’s rare but not unheard of. Magic was once common among all races, but the great wars of old nearly destroyed us all. There was a great cataclysm, and for a thousand years magic was lost to us. It has slowly begun to reappear. Our royal wizard Hydore is one of the most powerful of the human magi, but even he cannot summon the kind of magic the Goblin King possesses.”

  I realized just how lucky I’d been when I encountered the Goblin King, and just how stupid it was to play chicken with him. If that spell had hit one of us or our bat, we would likely be dead now.

  “But you fought the Goblin King and survived,” Eva said with reverence. “You are either very talented or very lucky.”

  “Maybe a little of both.” I glanced back, and the smile she gave me stirred my heart, not to mention my loins.

  We flew for hours, and the clear sky slowly filled with clouds. They didn’t threaten rain, but they did obscure the sun enough for me to lose track of it and my western bearing. I tried to fly straight and hoped we wouldn’t veer too far off course.

  The bat was getting tired. It flapped its wings less and less often, opting to glide on the currents. I didn’t know how much longer it could remain in the air, and I dreaded having the bat land on water. I had no idea what manner of sea monsters might haunt the ocean, and I didn’t know if the thing could float.

  “It’s getting so cold,” said Eva, clinging to me.

  “I know, but I don’t dare fly lower. The bat might decide it’s had enough,” I explained, my teeth chattering. My ears ached from the cold wind, and my eyes had shed so many tears, they were itchy and dry. It was often hard to breath, and my neck was getting sore from being bent forward so long.

  An excruciating hour later, I thanked the gods when land again came into view.

  “Land ho!” I pointed it out to Eva.

  “Oh, thank Celesta!”

  My stomach growled, and I ached all over as thoughts of food, shelter, and rest sprouted in my tired mind. I steered the bat toward the landmass, and the beast shared our excitement. It gave an ear piercing, stuttering shriek.

  The coast was rocky and violent, and a sheer cliff rose five-hundred feet above the water. Beyond that was a long rocky valley that steadily rose until it met tall tube-like
rock formations. We easily flew over the cliff, across the valley, and over the tall stones. Once we crested the ridge, the vast stretch of another valley spread out before us, speckled with rivers and ponds, and copses of short, gnarly trees.

  “We’ll put down there by the river,” I said and pointed at the spot.

  The bat didn’t need much coaxing to finally land, and it came in fast, flapping its wings and leaning back until I thought we might fall off. But we landed safely, and no sooner had I helped Eva down the short rope ladder and grabbed the supplies than the bat shrieked angrily, took a vengeful nip at me, and flew away.

  “Well, so much for flying all the way to your kingdom,” I said and sighed.

  “Good riddance,” she said, fanning her nose. “That thing stank.”

  “You got that right.” I scoured our surroundings, searching for a place to make shelter for the night. The clouds weren’t getting any darker, but they weren’t receding either. I had to assume it was going to rain and plan accordingly.

  A river snaked its way through the valley. It was shallow and clear, and I could see fish swimming in the deeper parts. The bank was flat and covered in small red stones, and there was a small island of rocks in the middle of the river, with a single stubborn tree growing at an angle near the far side. Copses of crooked trees dotted the land along the bank. Their gnarly branches were covered in peeling red bark that looked like crepe paper. Birds sang in the trees, which were flowering with white blossoms. I would have liked to make camp right there, but I had no tent and no means to make one. All I had were my weapon, backpack with two fur blankets, a water skin, and the food the monkeys had given us.

  “We’re going to have to hike to those rock formations and try to find a cave,” I said.

  She had taken off her shoes and was soaking her feet in the water, and she didn’t look pleased at the news. “Oh, but it’s so far.”

  “We can’t sleep in the open.” I filled the waterskin in the river. “It might rain, and we have no idea what sort of wildlife there is around here. And if the Goblin King—”

  “Yeah, yeah, I get it.” She huffed an exaggerated sigh and dried off her feet. “Why didn’t you land the bat over there in the first place?”

  “The bat landed itself. Come on, we’re burning daylight.”

  As we walked toward the wall of tubular stones, I cautiously tasted the river water. It was like pure heaven in my parched mouth. I handed the waterskin to her, thinking she would turn up her nose at it, but she drank greedily.

  It took us about half an hour to reach the stone formations, and I was heartened to find an abundance of natural caves and alcoves. I chose one that was about forty feet up along the ridge. It had a deep, dry cave, and I could see for miles from the entrance.

  “I’m so tired and hungry.” She sat on a flat stone just inside the opening.

  I searched the cave and found no evidence of inhabitants. My stomach growled then, I put down the furs and took out the dried meat, cheese, and the monkey snacks.

  “Get something in your belly and rest awhile,” I urged and tore off a piece of the tough jerky.

  “I want warm food,” she said as she hugged herself and walked over to me. She plopped down on one of the furs and absently nibbled the piece of meat I handed her. “And it’s so cold. It’s only going to get colder tonight.”

  “I know.” I finished my piece of meat, ate a chunk of cheese, then washed it down with a long swig of water.

  “Where are you going?” she asked when I got up and strapped the pizza shovel to my back.

  “To see if I can get more food.” I loaded the crossbow. “I’ll gather firewood too. With any luck, I can start a fire. The deadwood around here looks pretty dry.”

  “You’re going to leave me alone?”

  “Just for a little bit, and I won’t be far. If anything happens, just give a holler.”

  “Hurry back please,” she said, and the fact that she’d said please wasn’t lost to either of us.

  I smiled, but she hastily turned her attention to the food.

  I handed her the dagger. “You killed with it; you might as well keep it.”

  She took it without a word, and there was a haunted look in her eyes.

  I climbed down from the ledge. The clouds still obscured the sky, and it was steadily getting darker. Not only that, but the wind had picked up, and the temperature was dropping.

  I decided to gather firewood first in case it started raining. There was no shortage of deadwood, and I gathered as much as I could and brought it up to the cave. When I went inside to dump my load, Eva was snoring softly on a fur blanket. I put the wood down and covered her with the other blanket, then went to get another load.

  After I’d gathered enough for the night, I went in search of a game trail. I didn’t know what kind of animals lived here, but I assumed, given the similarities between Tarth and Earth, there would be some form of rabbit or hare.

  A narrow path leading out of a briar patch made my heart surge, and I hid behind a big rock to wait for something to come along.

  I’d done a lot of hunting in New York. Where I came from, around the Lake George area, almost everyone fished, trapped, hunted, or all three. I was used to waiting for hours in a blind, and I was used to not seeing anything all day. There was a meditative aspect to hunting. When I was out in the woods or in the bush, all the bullshit in society melted away. It was just me and nature. My mind slowed down, the senses were heightened. I listened to world around me, learned from the wind, and I was sharp and focused.

  I leaned against the stone for at least an hour and thought about home. I was surprised to discover I didn’t miss it all that much. I didn’t miss the traffic or the crowds of tourists that haunted Lake George this time of year, and I didn’t miss the hoops that had to be jumped through on a daily basis, like paying bills. I did however miss the food and the beer.

  Oh, what I wouldn’t have given for a beer right about then.

  Movement caught my eye, and I held my breath. Just peeking out from under the briar bush was a huge rabbit with ears that must have been ten inches long. I couldn’t believe how big the son of a bitch was or how thick its legs looked. The sight of the furry brown creature made my mouth water, and I imagined the thing on a spit.

  Stay cool, Jake. Easy now.

  I took careful aim and waited for the rabbit to walk into the line of fire. It seemed hesitant, but rabbits always are. I could barely see its nose working overtime as it sniffed the air, and I thanked the gods I was downwind from it.

  Finally it hopped once, twice, three times, then stopped to consider the world.

  I squeezed the trigger slowly.

  Twang!

  Thud!

  The scream of the rabbit shattered the silence, and I emerged from my hiding place and nocked another bolt as I ran toward the spasming creature. When a rabbit is injured, they sound like human babies, and it is unsettling as hell. I also didn’t want other predators to hear it. When I got close enough, I silenced it with a shot to the neck.

  I jumped for joy and pumped my fist in the air.

  Once I had properly honored the rabbit, I slung it over my shoulder and hurried up to our camp. I couldn’t wait to show the princess what I had provided, and I was determined to start a fire.

  On the way there, I grabbed a few handfuls of dried grass and crumbly moss, and snapped a nice straight stick off one of the trees. I intended on using to try and start a fire. I grabbed another, thicker branch to use as a spit, should I be successful in getting the fire started.

  “Eva?” I called as I approached the cave entrance. I didn’t want to scare her by suddenly showing up in the mouth of the cave.

  When she didn’t immediately answer, I dropped my load and pulled my pizza shovel from my back. Something rustled inside the cave, and my heart sank. My mind raced with terrible scenarios, and I cursed myself for having left her alone.

  I clenched my weapon and moved forward.

 
Some light spilled into the cave, and I stuck to the right side so my shadow wouldn’t be so obvious as I crept forward. If something had happened to Eva, I didn’t know what I would do. Not only did I not want to see her come to harm, but I didn’t want to be trapped on this planet for the rest of my life. I sniffed the air, but I didn’t smell monster stench. All I scented was a mix of lavender and roses from Eva.

  “Eva?” I whispered when I saw the lump in the middle of the cave.

  She rolled over and yawned. “It’s about time.”

  “Jesus, I thought something happened. You didn’t answer when I called your name.”

  She grinned at me. “Were you worried?”

  I ignored her and went back for the rabbit. When I returned, I dropped my kill on the stone ground beside her.

  “Ack!” she cried and reeled back.

  “I thought you’d like that,” I said and laughed when she glanced at me angrily.

  “You killed a poor bunny?”

  “Sure did. Ever have rabbit? It’s delicious and greasy, just what we need right now. I just need to start a fire.”

  I gathered some medium-sized stones and made a fire ring, then I set up my fire-making tools. She watched curiously as I worked and asked me what I was doing at every turn.

  “I’m going to rub this stick against the plank,” I said as I cut a slit in a flat piece of deadwood. Once I had the gap as wide as I needed, I placed it on four stones, one in each corner, and stuffed dried grass and moss under it.

  “I’ve never seen fire made like this. Are you sure that you know what you’re doing?”

  “Watch and learn, babe.” I spun the straight stick in the gap in the plank with my palms.

  “That isn’t working,” she said.

  “It takes time.”

  She hugged herself. It was steadily getting colder, and the wind blowing into the cave was chilling. The sun hadn’t yet gone down, but by the look of the dark sky, it would soon.

  “Why don’t you try something else?”

  “Because this is the only way to do it without a fire starter.”

  “Why don’t you have one?”