by Nicole Hite
"We are the number one magazine within all of your publications. I'm not sure where we need to improve. Is that not good enough?"
"Why do you feel this intense need to not only fight me on this, but to control this conversation? Sometimes things are out of your control, Harper."
"You want to know why I'm so defensive?
"Of course."
"My career is the only thing I can control. I can't control my destiny, or fate for that matter, but I sure as hell can control my career. I am the one that holds the cards when it comes to whom I allow in my life and how they affect me. I know this now.
“Luca, I had a pretty disturbing childhood. My father was verbally abusive to my siblings and me. His interpretation of love was telling us what pathetic and lazy kids we were. I was working three jobs in high school just to support our family and, yet, I was still lazy. Sweet irony, huh?"
Vivienne couldn't understand why she continued to talk, or reveal her deepest secrets for that matter. The words spilled from her lips, as the tears began to build up, threatening to crack her hardened interior.
"Look, I couldn't do anything about my father not loving me, but I sure as shit can control my career, my life and who I fuck.
“I may seem anal retentive, but, to me, it keeps me from losing my mind completely. What little insanity I still have. The more I feel things are out of control, the more I'm thrown back in time. A time where I was a scared little girl trying to protect my siblings from a verbally abusive asshole."
Vivienne had never spoken of her childhood with anyone. Even her therapist never got the full story of what really made up Vivienne Harper.
"As an older sister, I could have and should have done something. That’s just another reason why I do not allow myself to feel too deeply about anything, or allow anyone to deter me from my goals. If I teeter off that rock, I spiral out of control. You. You make me teeter, too, and it makes me feel unstable. Something I haven't felt in a long time."
Luca had twisted his head, staring at the ceiling in disbelief.
"My downfall is not being there for my siblings. I should have stayed in state for college. I should have gone to community college, and taken them out of that household, but I ran away like a coward. That burden has drilled itself into my soul ever since."
As she lay there with her head lying gentle against her pillow, the tiny tears began to threaten their existence.
"I know they hate me. Shit, I hate myself. I tried to make up for it by removing them from the house after college, but I fear the damage had already been done. Poor June-bug. She was my baby. My littlest one. She wouldn't even let me hug her when I left her at our aunt's house. I fear she will never forgive me."
Luca just lay there, taking in her words. A single tear escaped her eye as the memories and pain spilled out of her uncontrollably.
"Every night, I cry over them. I haven't heard from any of them in so long, Luca. I have nightmares that our father found them. In my nightmares, they blame me for their shitty childhood. Because, let's be honest, they never got to have a childhood, thanks to me. I was so selfish.
“I used to think our father loved them the most because he always yelled at me. As I got older, I realized he screamed because I tried hardest to love him. I tried everything to make him feel something besides hate and anger, but it consumed him. I was such a moron. They were the ones who couldn't fight back. They didn't have a voice. I was so envious of them. I was such an idiot for thinking that now."
Taking a deep breath, she slowly let the built-up emotion escape.
"So, to answer your question, I like control because it's the only thing preventing this already cracked heart from shattering."
Without a word or explanation, Luca sat up from the bed. He never made eye contact, but, instead, started putting his clothes back on. His actions were cold and dismissive. A feeling she hadn't felt in a long time. A feeling she had never wanted to feel again - rejection and disapproval.
Luca stood from the bed, grabbed his keys, and walked out of her bedroom and out of her life. Had he actually cared, she felt he would have stayed. But he clearly didn't, which only solidified what they truly were - acquaintances. Strangers in the night.
She had finally opened up to the one person she had connected with, and he had walked out on her when she needed him the most. Her heart was already cracked, but Luca? He shattered it completely. How was she going to recover from another devastating blow?
She had given herself, both physically and emotionally, to this man and he walked out on her. It wasn't enough to loathe him for trying to manipulate the magazine, but to invade her mind and body? This was something different all together.
Work had always been her sanctuary for when things became too much for her, but, even now, he had ruined that for her. He had taken away the last place she felt totally safe, and now she was left vulnerable and exposed.
Viv felt ashamed and juvenile for thinking this would be different.
8
"You got some s'plaining to do."
Sitting at her desk the next day, Vivienne's mind was clearly not in the mindset to work. She kept replaying the events from last night over and over in her head. Watching Luca get up, and just walk out, devastated her. She had never allowed outside forces to cloud her judgments and yet here she was, crying over her Cheerios.
Her one and only concern these days should be her magazine. Speaking of which, she needed to find out if Ariel was able to convince Owen to aid her.
Picking up her phone, she dialed Ariel's temporary extension.
"Vivienne? Is that you?" Ariel questioned, with an odd tone in her voice.
"Who else would call from your extension?" she specified, almost sarcastically.
"You just...never call me. You always yell for me when you need me. Excuse me if I'm a little shocked right now," she muttered.
"I didn't want to yell across the office for this. Can you come to your office?"
"Sure thing. Give me five," Ari answered, waiting to get scolded again.
"That's fine. If you need ten, that's okay as well."
"What the...?" Ariel had cut herself off, as she started to question what was going on. First, Viv called her and now she was actually giving her options instead of demands. Something was definitely wrong.
Propping her elbow up, Viv leaned on the desk with her chin in hand. Her mind was so murky, she was marinating in an ominous haze. She had always been one step ahead of things growing up, but, for once, she was completely at a loss for what to say or do.
"Vivienne? Viv? Harper?!" Ariel shouted to snap her out of the fog she was suffocating in.
Breaking out of it, Viv replied, "Ari. Thanks for coming." She felt completely out of it as she greeted her.
"No offense, but you look like shit."
"Thanks for the honesty. I'm not sure I appreciate it, though."
"What I meant to say is, you look overworked and tired. Did you get any sleep last night? Is everything okay?"
"Eventually it will be. That's kind of why I called you in. Did you talk with Owen about helping me?"
"Yeah. He said he's available anytime today. Just let me know what time, and I'll shoot him a text, letting him know what time to come here."
"See if ten is good. I want to get this wrapped up and taken care of by the end of the day.
"Can do, Vivienne," Ari responded, as she left her to her own devices.
Ten till ten, and Viv heard a knock on her door.
"Entrée," she voiced.
Stepping through her door was a fairly attractive gentleman covered in tattoos and a beanie. Ariel had done well for herself. Viv had never really been into the tattooed, scruffy, pierced type, but Owen made it look good.
Under his arm were two messenger bags of what she could only assume were laptops and equipment.
"Vivienne Harper, this is Owen Peters," Ariel introduced.
"Pleasure, Ms. Harper." He politely extended his hand to her.
"Okay, I can deal with that. So, what's the problem, Viv?"
Looking at Ariel, and then to Owen, "What is said in this room stays in this room. Got me?" She requested from the two.
"Oookay," Ariel responded, seemingly confused more now than ever.
"I think someone has been tampering with my computer." She looked at the two, almost feeling silly for saying it out loud. "I need to know I'm not crazy. I have a routine every month when it comes to submitting the paper, and, somehow, the incorrect drafts were sent to proofing. That never happens to me. I keep a file on my computer, and back it up on my USB drive. My computer files seem to be the old versions, yet, my USB files are not tainted. I just need answers."
"You called the right person. Where's your computer and USB drive?" Owen requested.
"They're both on my desk. Well, Ariel's desk."
"Got it," he affirmed, as he made himself comfortable in the leather chair.
Whispering to Owen as Ariel went through her cabinets, "You know, you should be really proud of your girlfriend. She's an amazing asset to this magazine. She's going to be a great Editor in Chief one day. Just don't tell her that," Vivienne chuckled.
"My lips are sealed." He winked at her.
Vivienne paced the office for a while before her and Ariel crashed onto the couch together.
"How long has this been going on, Viv?" Ariel questioned.
"Since Luca got here," she answered, almost ashamed, considering.
"Do you think he had anything to do with this?"
"I hope not." She looked fairly upset.
"You really like him, don't you?" Ariel asked, sympathetically.
"I wish I could deny it, but I do. We had an incredible night, and I allowed myself to open up to him. And, you know me, I don't open up." She felt disgusted and upset.
"So, why would he do this? He has nothing to gain by damaging our paper. His job is to see it succeed, not destroy it."
"That's what I can't put my finger on: why?
"Perhaps, we need to give him the benefit of the doubt. It could be a mistake," Ariel offered.
"It could, but it's not," Owen finally spoke up from his digital coma.
"What do you mean?" Vivienne asked, as she stood up to stand near Owen. Peering over his shoulder, Owen began to point out the discrepancies.
"It looks like a couple days ago, an administrator logged in under your name and reverted drafts for your documents. Had you not saved them to a USB, it would have been lost forever. He is extremely clever, but not clever enough."
"Was he trying to set you up for some fall?" Ariel questioned.
"Why me, though? What did I ever do?"
Immediately, her stomach started to churn at the sickening feeling rising from within. He seduced her to get closer to him while all the while trying to destroy her in the back scenes. His mission and visit seemed to become clearer and clearer. He didn't want to take down Empire; he wanted to take down Vivienne.
That didn't explain the clear connection between the two last night. She felt it, and she knew he did as well. That, or he was one hell of an actor.
"Do you know anyone in Bethany, Indiana?" Owen questioned.
"Why?" She immediately perked up.
"He talks to them a lot. Do you have offices there?" Owen asked.
"No, we certainly do not," Vivienne's blood began to boil at the news. Never in a million years would she have connected the dots had it not been for Owen.
"Are you okay, Viv?" Ariel questioned.
"I'm good now. I know exactly how to handle this. Thank you kindly for assisting me, Owen. I will have a corporate check drawn up for your services."
"That's really not necessary, Viv. I was happy to help Ariel's boss."
"Owen. Take the check. I won't offer it again," she encouraged, as Owen packed his belongings to leave.
Vivienne escorted the two to the door, shutting it behind them.
Trying to collect herself, she felt much more then rage at this point. She felt hurt, sadness, anger and a whole array of profanities. When she said she would die for HER magazine, she meant it. No one, not even Luca Manning, was going to destroy her career and her baby.
Composing herself, she stood straight, cracking her neck from side to side. This was not going to be pleasant and, yet, she refused to be a little bitch about it just because she felt something for the guy.
No, Vivienne Harper was the boss here. Not Luca Manning.
Cranking the door open with a thud, Vivienne stormed the hallways of Empire Magazine. As if she had regained her lady-balls, she heard the ruffling sounds of employees scrambling to get out of her line of fire. This was a bitch on a mission.
Without giving Luca the common courtesy of knocking, Vivienne burst through HER office door.
"Vivienne..." he began as he covered the receiver of his cell.
"When were you going to tell me you knew my sister, June?"
"I'll have to call you back," he said into the phone, hanging it up.
9
"There's just one problem..."
"That's probably a good idea," Vivienne indicated, as she stood like a giant in front of him. Stronger than ever before, she promised herself she would listen before automatically judging. But, honestly, that was going to be terribly difficult given the present evidence.
"I can explain..." he started.
"Well, I am alllll ears, Luca. I told you things I have never told anyone else. I told you about my siblings, my childhood, and you said nothing. Not a damn thing. That seemed like the perfect time to say something, don’t you think?"
"Fair enough. You are right. I should have said something."
"But..." she coaxed him to finish.
"It was a sticky situation, Vivienne."
"How did this even happen? No one reaches out to anyone in Bethany unless it's for a reason," she asked, confused.
"She reached out to me. We've known each other for years."
"Why? How?"
"When I first met June, we were both in a rough situation. Did you know your aunt passed around the time June was sixteen?"
"I had no idea. All I knew is she was being taken care of, and had a house over her head, food on the table and clothes on her back."
"We met years ago when we were in the foster care system together. I think that's a huge reason she resented you. She thought you knew all along, and had just abandoned them just like your father had."
"I had no idea, Luca. I never would have allowed them to go into the system. They must truly hate me."
"We stayed in touch over the years. Always making a point to keep tabs on one another. Your sister is exceptionally manipulative. Once she found out what industry I went into, she made her move, I suppose. She had the money, I needed it. She hit my vulnerable button, and I gave in."
"So, it was just about the money?" she questioned, as she crossed her arms across her chest.
"At first, yes. She told me horrible things about what you did. She said you purposely left them with your father, so he could physically and verbally abuse her and your siblings."
"But that's completely untrue." Her heart crumpled at the thought of June-bug going to such extent to destroy her.
"As soon as we talked the other night, it was a clear indication that she was deceitful. Her plot for revenge was only fueled by the abandonment issues she harbored. Her bitterness for you was evident in her every wish and command."
"Did she ask you to sleep with me?" Vivienne probed, dreading the answer.
"Hell no. I was immediately attracted to you when we first met. We are very similar creatures, Vivienne. We know what we want and we go after it. We also know what it's like to work from the bottom to get to where we are today. Not many people can relate to the struggles of clawing your way to the top under difficult situations," he listed, as he stood to walk over to her.
"Then, w
hy did you leave the other night or not say anything, for that matter?"
"I panicked. I was furious for what June had done, and it made me sick to know I was potentially ruining someone's career for what, money? We come from very similar backgrounds, Vivienne. I suppose that's why I was so drawn to doing the assignment in the first place."
"How could you possibly relate, Luca?" She looked at him, aggravated, as he continued to approach her.
"My father abused me for over ten years. He would come home after a drinking binge and beat the shit out of me for no plausible reason at all. See, that's also how June found me throughout the years. Not to mention due to the foster care system. I have a record - assault and battery."
"How do you have a wrap sheet?" she looked confused.
"One night I just...snapped. I was sixteen years old when my father came home one night, looking to start a fight. I took a Louisville slugger and just went to town. I nearly killed him, Vivienne." He tried to close the gap between the two of them.
Taking a step back, Luca could see the terror in her eyes.
"Vivienne, you have to know I would never hurt you. That was the one and only time I lost control. I spent years in therapy after that day. I was shipped to a foster home where I met your sister. We were damaged kids just needing a friend. It kills me to know that everything she told me was a skewed version of the truth."
"This is completely fucked up, you know that right?" She cringed as she looked at Luca, longing to touch him. All she truly wanted to do was curl into his arms and cry.
"I understand how crazy all this sounds. What we felt last night was real, though. Can you really deny that?"
"You practically got me fired, Luca. It's good I have an amazing staff, incredible friends and a lethal work ethic."
"No shit. Those saved me from making the biggest mistake of my life."
"Have you talked to June? Does she know you couldn't go through with her little plan?"
"I was about to when I was so rudely interrupted." He tried to give her a smile.