by Lindsey Hart
The three of them chatted happily, talking about how excited they were to be in Vegas. Hank had been there before. Twice. He’d worked sound for a band who thought they were going to make it big but eventually broke up. Jordan could tell that Cora was interested in Hank, though she pretended otherwise. Effie, he wasn’t sure about. She was quiet, adding to the conversation here and there. She wasn’t sure about wondering The Strip and he could tell she never drank. Her pale blue eyes darkened and became less focused with every passing minute and every sip of the gin and tonics she ordered. He figured she’d loosen up as the night went on.
Jordan tipped his beer and took a long swig. He hadn’t added much to the conversation since Effie was seated beside him and never turned to look at him once. Her back was stiff and straight, and he had the distinct feeling that she would have been much more comfortable seated beside Cora.
Their waitress, a young blonde woman who looked more than ready to call it a night, came around. Her eyes were tired, with bags underneath and her lips turned down. She either hated or job or was working a double.
Finally, because he had no choice, Jordan reached out and grazed Effie’s bare arm. She started at the contact and immediately leaned further away though his touch had been whisper gentle. Her light blue eyes, eyes that reminded him of a warm summer afternoon and a cloudless sky, pierced straight through him.
“What- oh.” She blushed fiercely then when she realized that she, basically his only method of communication short of banging on the table, had been ignoring him for the better part of an hour. Her eyes softened and to her credit, didn’t break away. He tried to ignore how beautiful her pale face was with those twin spots of color riding high on her cheekbones. “Would you like another drink?”
Jordan nodded. He left it at that. She could order whatever the hell she wanted, as far as he was concerned. He didn’t care, he just wanted to get the night over with.
It’s what I get for trying to be normal. For interacting with people who have no interest in knowing me or being friendly. Effie would never have asked me to come if I wasn’t her boss and she thought it was something she should do to be polite.
She ordered another beer for him, another gin and tonic for herself and then Cora and Hank ordered more drinks. Both doubles. Judging from the rate they were going it would be an early night.
“So, Jordan…” Cora started after the waitress had gone.
He turned his head her way, but she blushed the same way Effie had and dropped her eyes. He could literally read the obligation all over her face. Obligation to try and include him once they’d all realized he’d been sitting there unnoticed the entire time.
“Where did you grow up?” Effie filled in for her friend. Her pretty lips, a delicate shade of pink and soft looking, like the petals of a rose, turned up in a forced smile.
He thought about lying, but it was in his book so he opted for the truth. He signed back to her. Outside San Diego. On a farm. Small town called Montville.
Effie spoke for him while the others listened politely.
You probably already know all of that. You’re forced to hear the show every other night.
His attempt at a joke fell flat, but then again it was often hard to convey sarcasm or humor with just your hands. Cora laughed politely and then she and Hank were off, talking to each other about sound equipment and bands and tech stuff. He could tell Effie was as lost as he was. She finally turned to him since she had no other option.
“I’m sorry,” she leaned close and whispered. “I’m not usually so rude. I just didn’t even think…”
He signed back to her below the table. No problem. I’m used to it.
Effie shook her head. “No. It is. I invited you and I haven’t been a very good companion.”
Doesn’t bother me. Most people just assume that because I’m mute, I have nothing to say anyway. He regretted what he’d signed right after he’d done it. She obviously couldn’t tell if that was a joke or if those words were meant to be bitter.
Her eyes softened further. It was a fortunate chance that he glanced at the table top, where her hand lay flat, just in time to see a small tremor pulse through it. She was aware that he’d noticed, and she carefully tucked her hand in her lap.
He moved his eyes back to her face and he couldn’t help but be captivated by her effortless beauty and grace. She wore almost no makeup at all yet she was incredible. Flawless. Her skin was a delicate light hue, as pure as porcelain. Her blue eyes, blonde lashes and blonde eyebrows gave her a gentle, almost fragile look. He loved her lips. They were both expressive and dainty, like he’d noticed before, petal soft. The urge to touch her skin, her lips, her cheekbones, the ridge of her jaw, to see if it was all as soft as it looked, took him by surprise. He wasn’t normally drawn to people. No, he usually liked to put as much distance between himself and others as possible.
Effie was different. She had a magnetic force, a compassion and gentleness and understanding in her eyes that was inviting and attractive. She might not have been the traditional kind of beauty, but she was beautiful to him.
For as much as that matters. Stop staring at her. She probably already thinks I’m creepy. Attraction has absolutely no place on the tour. The last thing he needed was to be sued for sexual harassment. Just another reason coming out tonight was a mistake.
Effie cleared her throat delicately. She reached up self-consciously to tuck a strand of white blonde hair behind one small ear. A tiny pearl drop earring was the only jewelry she wore. He hadn’t noticed it before since her hair was covering her ears. He kept himself from staring below her neck since he knew that would only make her uncomfortable. He’d taken a few minutes to look at her earlier, when they’d been on the bus waiting for her friends and when they were walking. She had the body of a nymph. Tiny and thin, but still womanly. She was effortlessly graceful, like a dancer or a sprite. That’s what she reminded him of most. A fairy.
“I know what you mean. My sister is deaf. People used to treat her like that too. Like there was something wrong with her. She didn’t like to talk because she was afraid she’d sound silly. She obviously couldn’t hear herself and kids used to be really mean about her speech when she was younger. She went to a special school at first, to learn how to talk properly. She really sounded fine, at least to me. Maybe I was just used to her since she was my sister. It made me so angry, how awful people could be.”
Jordan stilled, taken by surprise. He didn’t know her sister was deaf. It would make sense since people didn’t normally just learn ASL without a reason. Effie was also one of the most adept lip readers he’d ever known. He knew she did it sometimes when she couldn’t see his hands up there on stage, though he tried to be careful that he was always in her line of sight. Sometimes she watched the screen in the back, he imagined, but there were some venues where it wasn’t possible to have one.
Thank you, he finally signed. It felt completely inadequate to thank her for her understanding and her kindness. For actually sitting there and talking to him. Fuck, I’m so damn pathetic.
Effie picked up her drink and tossed it back. She swallowed hard after, which told him she wasn’t normally a drinker.
“I don’t do this, normally. I… work. A lot. Back home, I did. And obviously, on the tour, I would never take the chance.”
This is different. It’s Vegas. The city of regrets.
She smiled a real smile and strangely enough, the cadence of his heart changed. The tempo increased the way it did when he first got up in front of the crowds who came to hear him speak. Or not. He smiled to himself again over the irony of it. He was a motivational speaker who couldn’t even talk. Not one word.
“I don’t have many regrets,” Effie admitted. She dropped her eyes and fell silent.
He realized she hadn’t meant to say that out loud. Is she already drunk after three or four drinks? He figured she could be if she normally did not drink. He was feeling the beginning of a nice buzz himself. It had been a
long time since he’d had a reason to go out and have a beer. Or anyone to go with.
“What about you?”
She didn’t want to ask that either.
Yes. I should have said no. I can’t talk about this.
She had mercy on him and didn’t ask what they were. Didn’t pry, didn’t ask him if she’d find them in the pages of his damn books.
He liked that about her, he decided. Her quiet humility and the way she knew to stop. The questions she didn’t ask, even if she probably wanted to.
“Are you guys ready to head out?” Cora finally raised her head and realized that he and Effie were still there. She had the grace to blush again. “I want to walk the other half of the strip.”
Effie groaned. “Good thing I’m wearing good shoes. We’ve already walked forever.”
“That was half an hour. There’s still a ton of things to see.”
“You can see it all from here. It’s just lights and people acting crazy.”
Cora laughed. It was a pretty, melodic sound. She was an attractive woman, shapely, beautiful even, but she couldn’t hold a candle to Effie.
“Come on, Effie. You don’t want to go back to the bus, do you?” Hank goaded. It was clear he didn’t want to call it a night.
Surprisingly she turned to him. “Are you good?” He nodded, and Effie blinked like she hadn’t really expected him to agree.
Cora grinned. “Okay then, let’s go.”
Jordan pulled out his wallet and pulled a couple hundreds out. He set them down on the center of the table. The other three froze, suddenly silent and awkward.
“You don’t have to pay for my drinks,” Effie said quietly.
It’s fine. I want to. He shrugged. I can write it off as an expense anyway.
“Drinks?”
He nodded. She shook her head slowly as Cora and Hank stood. They’d obviously decided it was alright to have a few free drinks and some wings on their boss’ tab.
They back on the busy sidewalk and neon-lit street when Effie touched his arm to get his attention. She didn’t need to touch him. He was fully aware that she was there. That gentle graze of her fingers on his arm burned right through the cotton dress shirt he hadn’t changed out of. As usual, it was done up all the way, the collar keeping prying eyes away from the scars on his throat.
“If you want to write something off, you need a receipt.”
He shrugged. Don’t worry about it.
“Thanks. For them too.” She indicated Cora and Hank, who walked side by side up ahead. “It’s a good thing you changed your mind and came after all or I’d definitely feel like a third wheel right now.”
They’re a couple?
Effie hesitated for a second. She surprised him by signing back. No. She says she’s not interested in that, but it’s pretty clear she is.
People don’t always say what they mean.
“I know.”
They walked for what felt like forever in comfortable silence, something Jordan wasn’t exactly used to. When long silences involved him, they were generally odd and awkward.
Cora and Hank walked fast, either from excitement or on purpose. They ducked into some liquor store and came out with a few bottles of straight hard stuff. Vodka and gin. Cora let them catch up and handed over a bottle of gin, smiling wickedly.
“Are you serious?” Effie groaned. “Haven’t we had enough drinks? I can barely walk a straight line as it is.”
“This is Vegas! Three drinks are just a start.”
“I’m pretty sure it was four and the way they pour here they were probably all doubles so more like eight or ten.”
“Jordan’s only had a couple beers. Give it to him then.” Cora laughed before she spun around. She brazenly reached out and took Hank’s hand. He seemed to have no problem with it and they sauntered off ahead again.
“What are we going to do with this?” Effie eyed the bottle dubiously. “It’s a damn two six and it’s heavy.”
I can carry it.
“And sign with one hand?”
He shrugged. Like I said before, anything I have to say, you’ve probably already heard up there on stage.
Those beautiful blue eyes swiveled to his face. Effie sighed gently. “Somehow I really doubt that’s true.” She turned as soon as those twin spots of color appeared again, and he had the distinct feeling she hadn’t meant to say what she just had. She kept the bottle in her hand.
They walked on, passing huge hotels, impressive structures, water features, greenery and all manner of people and cars. It was just past midnight and it was clear that The Strip was just waking up.
Jordan resisted the urge to put out an arm and protect Effie from the stumbling drunks and swarms of people. It wasn’t his place and she seemed to dodge them well enough on her own.
He was surprised when she stopped and undid the seal on the bottle. She arched a brow. “We might as well drink some of this. It wouldn’t be so heavy then. My buzz is starting to wear off anyway. Maybe it will kill some of the pain in my feet and back.”
He figured he could probably have a couple more drinks and still be sober enough to make sure they both got back to the bus safely. He nodded and reached out after she took a long swig. She grimaced and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.
“That’s strong with no mix.”
She handed the bottle over. His fingers closed around glass that was warm from the heat of her hand. It made him feel strange, his stomach oddly cramped. His groin felt heavy and hot and he purposely averted his attention, tipped the bottle back and drank back the gin.
It wasn’t his poison of choice and he had to stop himself from spluttering. He passed back the bottle, which had a good eight or nine ounces missing.
“That’s better.” Effie looked around, trying to peer through the throngs of people. “I have no idea where Cora and Hank went.”
Jordan scanned over the tops of heads, down the sidewalk ahead of them. He finally shrugged.
Maybe we don’t want to know.
Effie shuddered. “Ugh. They probably only left me alone because you were with me. I hope they wouldn’t have done that otherwise. I would be pretty intimidated trying to find my way back.”
There are cabs.
“Yah. That’s probably what I would have done.”
When Effie realized they were truly alone, just the two of them, she suddenly became shy. Her eyes flicked downwards, to the concrete sidewalk.
“Do you want to go back to the bus or keep walking? I don’t know that I need to go any further. You can see pretty much everything from where we are.”
The Strip is pretty much just The Strip all the way down as far as I’m concerned. Unless you want to find somewhere to play poker or back jack.
Effie giggled sweetly. The sound was gentle, at odds with the pulsing world around them. It wrapped Jordan up, rushed over him like a warm trickle of water.
“No, that’s fine. I don’t think I’d be any good at either.”
Her eyes were back on his face then, sparkling, beautiful, utterly irresistible. Her lips looked so soft and alluring. The magnetic pull he’d felt pretty much all evening was back, stronger than ever. She was standing not more than a foot away…
Jordan didn’t know what he was doing. He was filled with fear and nervous apprehension. He knew she’d push him away or tell him to fuck off after or berate him, but he couldn’t stop.
He stepped closer and reached up, barely daring to touch the delicate, beautiful, dainty little jaw. She was warm, so very warm, burning right through his hand, up his arm and straight to a soul that was far too lonely.
She froze. She didn’t move away. Her lips parted in shock, or perhaps, strangely enough, in invitation. He couldn’t make himself stop. He didn’t want to stop. His head bent. He knew it was wrong. Wrong for thousands of reasons.
For the first time in years, he had the courage to put himself out there, to make a move… and was absolutely shot down.
CHAPTER
5
Effie
Effie took a stumbling step back, heart racing, palms sweating, pulse ripping at the side of her throat. People passed her on the sidewalk, cars whizzed by on the street. The whole city was vibrant, alive, pulsing, but she felt like her world had suddenly ground to a standstill.
No! He’s my boss! If I let him do that now, I’m afraid I’ll never stop it. It would never go anywhere anyway… I can’t lose this job. Everyone back at home was so proud of me for getting it in the first place. If I lost it like this… I would never live it down.
She took another step back, hating herself for it. Her body ached. The heavy throbbing in her chest and stomach and lower, in places she had no business feeling it, made her want to step back into Jordan, wrap her arms around his neck and kiss the breath out of his lungs.
She wasn’t ready for that. Not now. Not ever. This was supposed to be a friendly night out with Cora and Hank. It was never supposed to turn into a romantic interlude that she might secretly want, but would never dare risk losing her job over, so she pretended it didn’t happen.
Her eyes flew about wildly, finally landing on the only thing she could think to use as an escape. The seediest looking club she’d ever seen. She pointed it out, afraid that if she actually looked at Jordan she’d see the burning intent behind his soulful eyes, she’d come completely undone.
“Do you want to go in?”
It’s almost last call, Jordan signed. He refused to look at her, taking her cue.
He tried to pretend nothing happened, but even without looking him in the eye, she could tell she’d wounded him. He was too proud to admit he’d tried it and failed and she was too embarrassed to admit that she’d mercilessly shut him off. With anyone else, it would be so simple. Why him? What is it about him that has always drawn me in and still fascinates me? She had to admit that she’d pulled away because she didn’t know how to deal with her own feelings.