by Jude Ouvrard
Presley comes over to where I’m standing with Cam, and he offers Cam a tight smile. There are still issues between them, but I think once Presley understands Cam only wants to be friends now, they can settle the differences between them. Presley holds out his hand to me and I take it, gripping his fingers fiercely. “It’s time, Abbie.”
He leads me towards the doors of the church, and I begin to tremble.
Chapter SEVENTEEN
Abbie
SETTLED AT THE front of the church for Mom’s funeral service, I’m surprised by the amount of flowers and friends who are sitting here with me. Mom’s portrait is surrounded by white roses. It’s a memorable picture of her. She looks great but mostly, happy.
Dwayne’s family offered me their condolences before the ceremony. Most of them I have only met once or twice.
When Presley squeezes my fingers and stands up. He gently smiles at me when he sees the unspoken question in my eyes and leans over to kiss my temple.
''Don't worry, love, I’ll be back in just a few minutes. I promise.”
Presley strides to the front of the church, his tattoos hidden beneath a somber black shirt. The pastor greets him and smiles warmly when Presley approaches the piano. I realize he's going to play for Mom. He hasn't even touched the keys and I’m already tearing up in preparation. He moves the piano bench silently and sits down. Placing both of his hands on the piano keys, he turns to peek at me when he starts playing.
The Dying Swan.
I’m sobbing by the time he’s played the third note. He remembers. He's perfect, and he’s mine. We had only just started dating when I’d told him about this song, and the meaning it held for my mother. He knows how I feel about it. It's a precious memory that I shared with her, and now him.
Alicia comes to sit beside me, putting her arms around my shoulders. She comforts me, and it feels good to have a friend supporting me.
''It was my mother’s favorite song when I was young,'' I whisper to Alicia. ''This is the sweetest thing Presley could have done. I'm so grateful to have him.''
''He loves you, Abbie, and this is what people do when they're in love. They never stop showing how much they care.''
''I know; I just need to get used to this-- someone caring so much about me.'' I know he loves me, but sometimes I’m still astonished by how much.
''Yes, you do.” She grins. ''He can play exceptionally well…Presley is so talented in so many artistic things.''
My eyes shift towards Bentley. He's in tears. I think it’s because he's proud of his son, or perhaps it’s the memory of losing his first wife. Either way, he’s doing nothing to hide it and my respect for him grows, knowing he’s not afraid to show the way he feels.
He and Presley have had some difficulties in the past, but I think Bentley definitely wants to make amends. I’m hoping that in time, Presley can forgive his father. I only wish that I could have met Bentley under different circumstances, but perhaps if he and Presley can work out their differences, we can spend time with Presley’s Dad and his step-mom in the future. My eyes return to Presley, as he plays the last notes of The Dying Swan. He turns to look at me, smiling timidly as he begins a new piece. I recognize the song immediately. Tears in Heaven, by Eric Clapton, another one of Mom’s favorites. Presley didn’t talk to me about this. I assume he has been working with Dwayne to select songs to play. This one was played at Dad’s funeral, and the memory of losing him, and now Mom, reduces me to a sobbing mess. Alicia tightens her arms around me, tears forming in her own eyes. Dwayne's sitting with his parents, crying for the loss of his wife. It’s obvious he loved her. I hope Dwayne finds happiness again one day.
My heart is broken in so many ways. Both my parents are gone and I’m not sure how to deal with this.
A hoarse voice startles me; I don’t realize where it’s coming from initially, as my eyes are brimming with tears. Alicia hands me a tissue and I dry my eyes. When I glance up again, I see it’s Presley.
Alicia whispers into my ear ''I can’t believe he's singing front of a room full of strangers. We normally have to beg him to hear his voice. He's doing this for you, Abbie.''
I’m so honored that he’s doing this for me, and for everyone who loved Mom. Alicia’s words suddenly hit me. He's making such an amazing effort to be everything I need. I’ve never heard Presley sing before. He’s only played piano for me once. His voice is soothing; it’s deep and husky, but the sound radiates through my chest and my heart. Soon, I have chills shooting all over my body.
I can't take this anymore…sitting so far away from him makes me ache to be near him. I stand up and start walking toward him. I intend to stand beside the piano and watch him, but as soon as Presley sees me, he moves over on the piano bench to give me some space, never missing a note. He looks at me with a timid smile. I kiss his cheek, placing my hands in his lap.
“Thank you so much.'' I say, as I watch him play.
I see it. A single tear slips from beneath one of his closed eyelids. He's trying to keep control of his emotions. I wipe the tear away with my thumb, and he opens his eyes again.
The song ends, and everyone applauds as if they had been attending a concert. All I can think about is Mom – the time we wasted apart, how I should have contacted her. I don’t want to live with regrets but today, it’s difficult. She loved me, I know. It should be enough for me to grieve peacefully. Our last days together were everything I needed. I love her.
''Love doesn't even cover half of how much I need, worship, and want you.'' he whispers, loud enough for only me to hear.
Presley stands up and offers me his hand. I follow him back to the pews, where his family sits. After we sit down, Presley kisses me. It’s not a simple kiss, but one filled with passion and longing. It crosses my mind that it’s barely appropriate for a funeral, or even a church, but I don’t care. I can feel Presley’s body shaking. He's going through something of his own. I want to know what it is, so I can help him, too.
''Are you alright, Presley?''
He nods. ''I am now. I just—Bee. I... I just...want you with me. Move in with me, or I’ll move in with you, but I can't bear the thought of spending one more night without you by my side.''
''We'll think about it, and make a decision together, okay?'' I whisper.
The pastor concludes the service with a prayer, and we move outside to stand in the front of the church. Presley holds my hand so tightly, as if he is afraid that I might run.
''Relax, Presley; I'm never going to leave you.''
''I know.''
He presses his other hand against his chest. ''My mom–she left me, Abbie. She broke my father’s heart, and today it feels as if I'm finally saying goodbye to her, as well as your Mom.''
''I'm not leaving you. I love you, don't you forget it,'' I murmur against his cheek. ''I'll marry you, Presley. Tomorrow, if you want, or in a week, or a month.'' I smile warmly.
''You’re strong, Abbie.''
I place my hand on his chest, feeling his beating heart beneath my fingertips. ''You are, too.''
I lean in to meet his lips again, and we kiss. The service was perfect. I'm sure Mom is happy, wherever she is. As we walk outside toward the cemetery, I’m calm and in control. There are so many graves around us. So many persons went through the same emotions I’m feeling. The reality is so sad. I know this is the final goodbye, but I have Presley beside me. He keeps me strong. Under the warm afternoon sun, the last rose is placed on my mother’s coffin. They slowly lower her into the ground. We're all quiet. Presley and Alicia are on either side of me. I need them for support. Presley whispers into my ear, “I’m here for you, now and forever.”
''I need you.'' I say repeatedly.
We walk through the cemetery, holding hands, and I feel at peace.
After years without communication with Mom, the anger I was tormented by has been replaced by a sense of peace that soothes my heart and soul. We all have our reasons for what we do, and I believe Mom obviously had some iss
ues of her own. The last few days has made me think and accept our situation. I’m grateful that we had a little time together before she died, and I know that wherever she is, she is better now.
“This morning, Dwayne gave me something for us both.” Presley announces quietly. “I wanted to wait a while before I gave it to you, but you seem so relaxed, I think it’s okay if I do it now.” He retrieves something from his pants pocket and holds up his clasped fist. He opens his hand before me. Against his palm sit two rings.
I stare at them for a minute, hardly daring to breathe. “Those are my parents’ rings.”
Presley smiles. “Would you like to wear your mother’s ring?”
“Yes, I think I’d like that.” I smile, even though my heart is still heavy. Knowing this was my mother’s ring saddens me. “Dad had good taste. It’s a pretty ring.”
“I’ll get you one of your own later, love.” Presley says, as he places the ring on my finger.
“I have you, it’s all that matters, Presley.”
We kiss under the branches of a tree, holding hands and my heart beats full of love.
''Come on now, you two lovebirds, we have reservations to keep at the restaurant.'' Bentley informs us.
We follow Bentley to a fancy restaurant and Cameron joins us too. He has been quiet ever since our discussion this morning, but he smiles every time our eyes meet. At the restaurant, Cam sits beside me, and he's the same old funny Cam again, the one I enjoyed spending time with.
I’m relieved that he finally gets it. We’ll be friends for as long as we live. He understands that I’m with Presley now; he accepts the connection Presley and I share. Cam and Presley are getting along better now, which makes it easier on me. I hope in the near future they’ll become friends, but I’m afraid that might be asking for too much. Everyone around the table seems happy, even though we’ve just attended a funeral. I try to keep track of the conversation, but I don‘t say much. I’m too tired to participate. I want to stay in my own little bubble with Presley. He rubs my hands and shoulders every once in a while. Having him close by is enough to make me feel better. He's my guardian angel; I hope he knows that.
I’ll always need him.
Presley
It's good to be home. I’ve missed the west coast more than I thought I would. South Carolina offers very nice weather. It’s warm and the beaches are breathtaking–but it’s not for me. Abbie and I are staying at my place for the moment. We haven’t discussed what we're going to do in the long term. I know she likes her place and wouldn’t like to give it up. I want to give her time to heal before we make any decisions about where we’ll live on a permanent basis. I know she's still sad, and thinks about her mother a lot, but she's strong. She's catching up with work, and she hangs out with us as much as she can. To be honest, I think she's trying to keep busy, to keep her mind off things.
Abbie has told me she misses her mother more now than before, and Erin’s death has also brought up memories of her father. She’s dealing with a lot right now and I’m doing everything I can to make it better for her. We’ve been back home for three days now. In those three days, Abbie’s done all the laundry, cooked all our meals, and cleaned the apartment. Which I don’t mind, even if it wasn’t dirty. Abbie says it relaxes her. She also went out and bought me a ring, after we discovered her father’s ring wouldn’t fit my finger. She didn’t want to get it sized and I understand her reasons. It’s probably the only thing she has from her father. The one she got me is white gold with a single diamond, and it’s perfect. She even had our names engraved on the inside of the ring. It says ‘P & A Forever’. I think it was absolutely sweet of her, and it adds something special to the ring. I’ve sworn to myself I will never take it off.
Tonight, we're planning to hang out at the Lucky 13. Joshua, Alicia, Joy-Anna and Derek will all be there, so it should be fun. The guys from the Ink Me tattoo shop are supposed to stop by with their girlfriends. I haven’t seen Levi or Kyle in a while, so I’m looking forward to it. Since Levi’s bachelor party, we haven’t heard from the guys much. Abbie had some errands to run, so she plans to meet us there.
When she announced her plans, I spoke. ''Bee, take my car. I’ll get a ride with Joshua or Ian.''
''Are you sure? I mean, it’s your baby...'' She smiles, giving me time to change my mind. She knows how much I love my car, and no one else has ever been given permission to drive it.
''You are my baby. My car is only...my mistress.'' He grins and winks.
Bee narrows her eyes. ''Oh, no, Presley Williams…you did not just say that.''
''I'm afraid I did, Mrs. Williams.'' I hand her the keys and kiss her goodbye. God, I miss her touch. Since we’ve been back from South Carolina, we haven’t spent any time together. Intimately, I mean. She’s needed to rest and hasn’t seemed to want it. I know I do, but I don’t want her to feel pressured.
''I need to run by my apartment to pick up a few things. I’ll meet you there, alright?”
''Yep. I can’t wait to see your cute little ass on the dance floor.''
''In your dreams, baby, only in your dreams.'' She kisses my lips briefly, grabs her purse, and reaches for the door.
''We’ll see.'' I say, knowing she doesn't enjoy dancing, but she's not bad at it. She’s got moves, but Abbie’s too shy to be seen dancing in public.
The door opens almost as quickly as it closed and Abbie pops her head through the doorway. ''You didn't mention it, but...I like your new tattoo. I’m looking forward to a private session with you soon.'' She blows me a kiss and winks. ''Bye, now.''
She's the best fiancée in the world, she really is. She wants me to tattoo her! This is fabulous. I can't wait to talk about it more seriously with her. What does she want? Something big, or small? Black and grey, or colorful? Hidden or placed somewhere obvious, where everyone sees it? My mind is going crazy. I’ve never been this excited about doing a tattoo. I’ve tattooed girls I’ve dated before, but this–this is so much better. I want it. Badly. I can imagine Abbie with a nice tattoo on her shoulder, or maybe half a sleeve, or perhaps one on her ankle. I could spend all night drawing designs for her. I start some sketches with a big smile on my face. I love tattooing, and knowing I’ll be tattooing Abbie makes it even more special.
My apartment suddenly feels empty and cold. I don’t want to be on my own, so I head over to Joshua’s apartment to hang out with him and Alicia until we're ready to leave.
“Tonight is going to be great.” Alicia declares while giving me a glass of water.
“I agree. It’ll be good to hang out at the bar. A change of scenery is always good.”
“I’ll be good for Abbie.” She adds and I nod in return.
Alicia's excited about tonight…she's convinced it will be good for Abbie. She thinks it's time Abbie gets back to normality. I know Abbie needs to grieve for her mother’s death at her own rhythm, and I’m prepared to give her all the time she needs. I had a hard time when it happened to me. Mine was a different story, but it still took some time before I could go back to my normal life. I was never able to say goodbye to Mom. The last time I saw her, I was very young, and I was holding onto the thought that she would come back one day. Discovering she’d passed away, and knowing I’d never see her again, was the start of a tough period in my life. I want Abbie to take all the time she needs, to recover from her own Mom’s death.
The bar is crowded, and the music is loud. It's going to be a fun night. Derek, Joshua, and I grab plenty of shots, sharing them with the girls. I just wish my girl would get here, already. I’m already feeling the effect of the alcohol on my body. It’s good to let loose once in a while.
''Presley?'' A familiar voice calls my name from across the bar.
I turn around, and to my shock, Kelly is standing in front of me. This is a nightmare. She looks wasted, and her clothes…well, shit, she looks like a stripper. She’s wearing a very short red leather skirt, with black, knee-high boots and a cropped tank top that only just covers h
er breasts. I can’t believe this. She never dressed so trashy when we were together. I’m suspicious that she is up to no good.
I cross my arms over my chest. ''Kelly, I thought Joshua made it very clear the other night. You can’t hang out here. Just leave, already.''
Kelly wavers on her feet a little and offers me a snide smile. ''So you finally dumped that little bitch of yours? Or did she break your heart?''
I shake my head in disbelief. She isn’t going to give up.
''Neither. Abbie's on her way. Actually, we're planning on getting married, Kelly. You should go now, before you embarrass yourself any further.''
She laughs hysterically ''Presley fucking Williams is getting married?''
I nod, my anger increasing by the second.
''Is she pregnant? What’s the rush?'' She snatches Joy’s shooter from the bar and slugs it down, then waits impatiently for my answer. ''You have it bad for that bitch, don't you?''
Joshua appears by my side, just in time. I was about to kick her out myself.
''Kelly, it's time for you to leave. Come on, let’s go.'' Joshua says, holding her arms and firmly pushing her toward the door.
Kelly struggles against him and shrieks. ''Wait! I’m with Donna and Nathan, at least let me tell them we‘re fucking leaving.''
Donna and Nathan are here? I search the crowded room for them. It's normally easy to find Donna. Her hair is pink, the exact shade of watermelon bubble-gum, and Nathan is the pierced lip guy, standing next to her 24/7. They’re both trouble and have addiction issues. Drugs, mostly. When Kelly is playing with them, it can get dangerous, but I don't care anymore. It's her life, her problem, her shit. Not mine. I'm happy to see them all leave the bar. I just hope that one day she will let it go and leave me the fuck alone. I’m not interested in her, and that isn’t going to change.
I buy another round of shooters, and glance around the bar. I’m getting anxious, Abbie should be here by now. I don’t want her to worry about Kelly. She doesn’t need to know that bitch was here. She has enough to deal with right now.